| What a man over 45 looks for in a relationship.
Posted: 5/4/2008 6:52:47 AM | ...All the duties and chores that are included in a Working, Loving Relationship..!!
From mowing the grass...to taking out the trash..!!
Naturally . . a Meaningful Relationship will have its share of Romance, Too..!!
I'm looking forward to singing some of my favourite Love-songs . .
and dancing with a Lady that I can dedicate my Life to . . !!!
* A 1-Man-Woman . . for a 1-Woman-Man...!!! *
. .   . . | |
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| What a man over 45 looks for in a relationship.
Posted: 5/4/2008 7:24:06 AM | LOL
Mackevinized, my thoughts were the same as yours.
What's to discuss here? 
Well, I guess someone could say they're looking for a friend/mate who tend to make:
their parents wish they'd never visit
dogs slink away
cats yeow and run from the room
old people cry and wet their britches
children pass out from fright
people run to other side of road
babies scream and turn blue
and last but not least...
landlords take them to court for painting all the walls/ceilings black and peeing in the corners!
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| What a man over 45 looks for in a relationship.
Posted: 5/4/2008 7:53:50 AM | Whoa Nelly! Note this was a statement not a question. And not a broadcast as was noted on here. And the list was actually an accumulated list from a men's health
magazine. But let the masses storm the tower.
I had a feeling this would stir up ridicule for no other reason than primal trivial
tribal intolerence.
Your opinions are appreciated because we all have bellybuttons.
Good Grief!
Skunxster!
Take Care!
It is far better to grasp the universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring.
Carl Sagan | |
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| What a man over 45 looks for in a relationship.
Posted: 5/4/2008 8:48:08 AM |
Here is what I look for.
1. I look for a woman who may not necessarily put me first, yada yada.
2. However, I need to rank within the Second or at a minumum Third.
3. I also look for a woman who is not so much into herself, yada yada , most importantly the man in her life.
4. This is what I am willing to do and I would hope I will be able to find.
5. As I see it, chemistry is important, but even more important are
6. loyalty,
7. integrity and
8. devotion.
OK so I broke it into segments and paraphrased but Seems rule # 1 is in conflict with rule #3
If you design a form, it would be easier for the babes to fill it out.
These qualities will often make up for 100% chemistry which anyone knows is impossible anyway.
Go back and read Cinderella again and learn about kissing toads and the knights of the roundtable.
Then tell me chemistry isn't real.
Check out cosmo and playboy, They know everything about real relationships. | |
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| What a man over 45 looks for in a relationship.
Posted: 5/4/2008 9:00:08 AM | Things that come to mind:
Mutual acceptance and respect
Financial responsibility. Not how much you have, but how you manage whatever it is you do have.
Willingness to express feelings, share ideas and conjure up mutual dreams.
Alcohol is not a necessity to having fun.
If you're still concerned with your parents approval, your family dynamics are out of wack.
Decorating? I don't care... as long as you have somewhere I can sit.
If you have pets and/or children you know loving them is sometimes not letting them have everything they want, but making sure they have everything they need. | |
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| What a man over 45 looks for in a relationship.
Posted: 5/4/2008 9:11:23 AM |
Whoa Nelly! Note this was a statement not a question. And not a broadcast as was noted on here. And the list was actually an accumulated list from a men's health
magazine. But let the masses storm the tower.
I had a feeling this would stir up ridicule for no other reason than primal trivial
tribal intolerence.
Your opinions are appreciated because we all have bellybuttons.
Good Grief!
Skunxster!
Take Care!
...Don't take it to heart, you know what this place is like...besides, it can be very entertaining to watch the masses storm the tower
...maeflowers | |
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| What a man over 45 looks for in a relationship.
Posted: 5/4/2008 7:22:52 PM | Hi Everyone,
well I'am 52 yrs old and beats the H-ll out of me what they want they want young 35 yr old women because they are not as mature with their life like us older ones, they want sex on the first date if they buy you a beer NOT!!! also they are not as well kept like us ladies we are far better looking, more attractive we take care of ourselves, and we are more young at heart. they havn't a clue what they want.. they name stuff thats high school... On the other hand we know what we want and I havn't seen one yet that I'am interested in..they have no personality, don't dance stand holding the wall up like high school, don't open the wallet. don't smell clean and look presentable. And They have The Nerve to tell us and make lists of WHAT THEY WANT !!! I DON"T THINK SO. They need to go to Brawney Boot Camp !  | |
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| What a man over 45 looks for in a relationship.
Posted: 5/4/2008 7:50:36 PM | A number of years ago, I was sitting around a fire with a buddy, sipping back a few wobbly-pops. We’d both been single for quite a while and conversation got around to our ‘perfect woman’ – the qualities of a woman that would be the perfect match for each of us. I was so sure with my description – her interests, age (approx.), personality, professional focus, hobbies, demeanour, approx. height & weight, even hair and eye colour. And do you think that anyone I’ve wanted to get close to since that day has been even close to that ?? – nope. Hardly a single detail has even been remotely similar. I learned from that day on that preferences, lists and criteria for what I want in a relationship are a waste of time, a waste of thought. As Nickphilosoph said in post 10 – “Affairs of the heart do not work that way.” For me anyway, it’s not about what I want in a relationship, but why I want the relationship. I‘ve always thought that the onus should be on me, not her. Am I looking to fill a ‘hole’ in my life? Am I really just wishing to add the companion, that amongst my peers, I seem to be the only one without? Do I want someone to share my interests with me and fill those lonely times that we all face, or have I just met someone that has nothing to do with any of these personal needs and desires? That’s what I want in a relationship – someone who causes me to throw all my preferences out the window, someone who makes me want to redefine my priorities in life, someone who turns out to be nothing like what I thought she would be, someone that a little voice inside me whispers: “She's the one.”
cdn guy | |
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| What a man over 45 looks for in a relationship.
Posted: 5/5/2008 2:37:23 AM | wow OP impressed I am all that and more....
So guessing you are all those things too.... lets set up a date and a wedding quick, cos I am not letting you go.
Me - I am looking for a man that dates first and go from there. Smile | |
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| What a man over 45 looks for in a relationship.
Posted: 5/5/2008 5:33:38 AM | It's an interesting topic and there have been a lot of great posts (like Gary) and funny posts about it.
I think companionship and the ability to laugh and have fun together is a major quality that most people should look for in relationships as they get older. That's the quality that I see the most in successful relationships that last. Of course, honesty and mutual respect and caring are necessary, too.
In the most loving relationship that I had, he was looking for qualities like the OP. Honesty, a sense of humor, the ability to compromise and to be respectful of each other, kindness...........someone who valued a home and being a couple as much as he did. Being attractive was about seventh on his list ......... he wanted someone who looked decent but he knew that as a couple get attached, they get more and more attractive to each other with familiarity. And he knew that if the caring and laughter and respect for each other was there, the sex would be, too so that was low on his list. He was willing to wait for that while the getting to know each other and the attraction and affection developed ......... I think he was a pretty smart guy! I know that all his relationships (in his 70 plus years, he had three) lasted decades.........  | |
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| What a man over 45 looks for in a relationship.
Posted: 5/5/2008 6:57:10 AM | I'm looking for the "it" factor. Don't ask me what it is - I'll know it when I feel it.
I try to avoid making checklists as they just constrain the possibilities. Besides I hate "shopping".
Life is like a box of chocolates ya know..... :) | |
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| What a man over 45 looks for in a relationship.
Posted: 5/5/2008 8:28:39 AM | ^^^^
well I'am 52 yrs old and beats the H-ll out of me what they want they want young 35 yr old women because they are not as mature with their life like us older ones There's always one bitter old nut that should make others of her sex cringe because of her "honesty always" and "communication is key."
Since when does "mature" = paranoid? | |
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| What a man over 45 looks for in a relationship.
Posted: 5/5/2008 2:56:20 PM | I agree with Skunk12pu
I'm not sure how to put all of that nice stuff into my profile. Should I just come out and give examples of how nice I am? I open doors for the elderly and disabled. I am nice to the neighbourhood kids and pay them for chores. They say "hi" as they run by. I've taught children with autism and that takes a great deal of patience. I've raised two nice, independent, intelligent kids into adulthood. They're happy to visit and they don't want to return to live with me until they're 30. They love me. My kids' friends love me. Pets like me. I am even nice to telemarketers. (I say no thank you.) My house is decorated and"calming". My home looks fresh and lived in, not like I'm ready to move out of my college dorm or I've "staged" it for sale. I have a cool garden.
Should I say all of that? | |
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| What a man over 45 looks for in a relationship.
Posted: 5/5/2008 5:06:59 PM | | Regarding Number 5 on the list...For some of us, how we decorate our place depends largely on budget, time, etc. I would rather spend my time pursuing the interests listed on my profile then on decorating (I don't spend much time at home, anyway.) I am not Martha Stewart. But, if you would like to hire Martha to come decorate my place...hey, I'm game! | |
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| What a man over 45 looks for in a relationship.
Posted: 5/5/2008 8:00:08 PM |
Yea, the OP is gonna be single a long, long time.
...Somehow, I don't thinks so. A lot of what he has to say makes sense. When observing members of the opposite sex, I watch how they treat people, children and animals. It tells me a lot about their personality and whether or not I want to get to know them . Most people enjoy being around, postive upbeat individuals, negative people are too draining...they take away all one's good energy.
I cannot tolerate arrogance, rudeness or bullies...turns me right off. We all have a want list and I know what I don't want.
...maeflowers | |
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| What a man over 45 looks for in a relationship.
Posted: 5/6/2008 12:52:40 AM |
I'm looking for the "it" factor. Don't ask me what it is - I'll know it when I feel it.
I try to avoid making checklists as they just constrain the possibilities. Besides I hate "shopping".
Life is like a box of chocolates ya know..... :)
I totally agree, but I keep losing that guide and end up with the nuts! lol
Not really, but as u know .. 'I can't help mysef'. :D
OT - Do "All" men over 45 want a relationship let alone the same thing in one. I figure us women all want some'thing' or someone different .. And ya know what else I think? Well, since you asked I'll tell you! lol I figure when Love bites you = all those wish lists, musts and even your taste in chocolates flies right out the window! lol We really don't seem to have my choice who we fall for, only who we stay with ..
A.S.is
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| What a man over 45 looks for in a relationship.
Posted: 5/6/2008 5:51:56 AM | Start with Chemistry . . and how well you Dance together . .
Do you dig each others sense of humor...?
Enjoy holding hands...touching...tickling...??
Communication is pretty much a given . . along with how each compromizes and
accept Pleasing each other with the Little Chores...!! | |
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| What a man over 45 looks for in a relationship.
Posted: 5/6/2008 6:39:25 PM | All right, I will try to answer with my own truth about what I look for in a "relationship". 
I want a woman that will explain to me at length what she means by "relationship" and listen to me explain what I mean so that we are at least pointing to the same thing with this word that denotes nothing but connotes everything that is important to her (or me!). If she is not willing to talk about this sort of thing near the start, I can only assume she would rather test my ability to read her mind about what she wants and expects. If that is so, time to go  because I have proven many times over that I do not have even a sliver of ability to do that.
A part of this is talking about what we will do when one or both of us gets upset with one another, because I know we will. It seems to me it is better to build some rituals we can use when things go astray rather that just taking it for granted that we will do something constructive in the heat of the moment. 
Next I want a woman who has her own things that interest her and will leave me alone while I do the things that interest me. Added to that is that we give each other our complete attention when we are doing things together. I do not want a lady that needs to get in the midst of everything I do and I don't want to be in the midst of all that she does. I do want to have some things in common that we do together and both enjoy without reservation. 
That's it, that's my list. All that other stuff is things I might notice, but I don't see them as important. And, ahem, I don't make it a practice to hang back, observe and judge as suitable or not a lady I just met. I believe I won't learn a darned thing about her unless I jump right in and engage in some way. However I do thank those that talked about this, as some of my first meetings felt more like an audition for an acting job than an actual conversation with a real person. Needless to say, I never got the part. | |
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