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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?      Home login  
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 Ignorancisbliss
Joined: 4/25/2008
Msg: 376
wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?Page 16 of 21    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21)
You get the thrill of being w/ an older woman.

 decent_m
Joined: 1/31/2008
Msg: 377
wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/15/2008 7:32:35 PM
As mentioned in an earlier post my beautiful wife was older than me. If that makes me a clown 4dutyandhumanity then hand me the red nose and oversized shoes
 Sharzi
Joined: 10/6/2007
Msg: 378
wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/15/2008 9:43:43 PM
4dutyandhumanity wrote:

****** What a self-serving load of b.s. You would think true love doesn't go away just because you're older, given that you're looking for guys substantially younger than your stated age of 50, which you're also lying about. ******


This is exactly why I don't date men over 46 anymore.... nasty, condescending, and angry pretty much sums it up. Instead of simply asking me why I have 50 on my profile or why I date younger men, you choose to attack me instead. I would never treat someone like that, and especially someone I don't know. I have a feeling so many older men are so touchy because women in the age range they're looking for are looking for younger men. But maybe we wouldn't if men over about 45 or 46 were a little bit nicer. Sorry, but I've had my fill of being treated like this by men around my own age. And, I'm not the only one who is experiencing this. All of my friends and women from work are telling me the same thing.

I do have a real problem with men my age because most of them act like you.

Sharzi
 Sharzi
Joined: 10/6/2007
Msg: 379
wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/15/2008 9:55:43 PM
ladyc4 wrote:

******perhaps some women report themselves as being younger because have found that a significant number of men their own age are rigid, judgemental, set in their own ways as solid as cement, it's their way or the highway...?? ******

Thank you!!! Exactly. The attitude of the guy who responded to my post is exactly the sort of thing I come across all the time with men around my age or older.

I date men who are younger because I've never been treated as badly as I have been by men over 46. I promised myself I would never go out with anyone older than that again. I have made exceptions and every time I have, I've been sorry.

I report myself as 50 because the men in the age range I date never seem to search over 50. I tell any man interested the very first time we talk that I'm 53. I'm not ashamed of that or trying to hide it.... just would prefer to come up in searches for men in the age range I prefer.

My experiences with men over 46 have been horrible. I've been called fat right to my face, told they didn't like my makeup or perfume, my hair or even the shoes I wear. Rudeness seems to be the norm. They have been rude to waitresses, impatient in just about every way.

Also, many times men around my age haven't updated their look.... still wearing those huge glasses they bought in the 80's, have the whole combover thing going on, dressing like my father, and I am just not attracted to that. And I'm for sure not attracted to that attitude.
Sharzi
 4dutyandhumanity
Joined: 4/20/2007
Msg: 380
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wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 5:48:05 AM
^^^^^^^^^^^^

I know this is hard to hear ... but you lot having a tough time being attracted to guys your own age ... we're having the same problem with you. Try getting over yourselves.

50 year old bodies, 17 year old attitudes - not pretty.
 galonthemt
Joined: 10/31/2007
Msg: 381
wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 5:56:18 AM
I am very honest about my age, and date younger because that is what asks me out. I guess the men I'm meeting are not as superfical about an aging body as you are 4duty. Gee could they actually find something attractive about my personality. I am fit, and active and no I dont date babies, but I do got 10 years younger. An I personally dont have a problem with men my age if they have a positive attitude and dont have remote syndrome. OR A BAD ATTITUDE................
 Wishes Granted
Joined: 3/6/2008
Msg: 382
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wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 6:30:36 AM

50 year old bodies, 17 year old attitudes - not pretty.

Why would someone with a less than perfect body and an apparent ancient, outdated attitude throw such stones? *shakes head at the hypocricy*

I'm thinking the Op doesn't appreciate you hijacking this thread with your own totally unyielding agenda. If lying about age bothers you as much as it apparently does, then why not start your own thread about it... where you can insult people under your own time?
 Bikeman_
Joined: 10/8/2005
Msg: 383
wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 6:42:39 AM
I can almost understand why a man or woman explicitly posts their age as being different that what it really is. To attract someone who they feel is appropriate. Fine. Age just is a number. But if you think about it, if someone has not included you in their search because you are 53 and they typed in 45-50, you in essence believe you are somehow going to "enlighten" this person.

I think the better strategy is instead of sitting back waiting for someone to contact you, you proactively do the profiling and look for a partner who attracts you. A 53 year old I think is more likely to find an amenable 45-50 year old suitor this way instead of having someone stumble into their profile and then have to explain things.

I might be wrong, I have no evidence on my end because I haven't misrepresented my age and I'm pretty flexible regarding age ranges of women to date.
 Wishes Granted
Joined: 3/6/2008
Msg: 384
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wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 6:56:26 AM
^^ I agree. I don't want to mis-represent. I would rather feel that someone contacted me knowing how old I actually am. However; I understand the premise of this thread and why some of the women do not state an actual age... Some people however, can only see one opinion.. Their Own and are unwilling to concede anothers arguement... Those types, no matter how old, I prefer to keep my distance from.

Edit to 4doodyandinhumanity msg 390... once again, you prove my point!
 someonesx
Joined: 9/25/2007
Msg: 385
wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 7:08:02 AM
I agree with bikeman and wishes granted and I have my accurate age on my profile because I don't want to have to explain later...I'm not thin so that alone is already a huge "negative" for me where the male fish in this pond are concerned...

I do however, have to agree with Sharzi about men's attitude especially men my own age up to 55...most, not all have a ridiculous list of must have's about age, size, looks when they themselves are certainly not GQ models...

If I see they have an age range on their profile showing less than their own stated age, I will point out to them that they are being hypocritical in not being willing to even consider someone their own age and are seeking someone as much as 8-10 yrs younger...

I very bluntly tell them, if you're not interested in even giving a person your own age an opportunity to get to know, don't ask me to give you a chance either. You don't want to date someone older and while I would, its ARROGANT HYPOCRITES like you I'm not interested in...then I put them on block and wipe the "jerk dust" off my hands and keyboard

edit:VVVV4duty Newsflash for you, there are younger men looking for older women...and there are also men that aren't so narrow minded to only think someone younger than them would be suitable to have a relationship with...

you have a right to your own choices; but you don't need to insult anyone and say they are living a fantasy...heck I could say the same thing about men older thinking they can get younger...for some of them, it would be only a fantasy :rolling my eyes at you
 4dutyandhumanity
Joined: 4/20/2007
Msg: 386
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wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 7:10:59 AM

Some people however, can only see one opinion.. Their Own and are unwilling to concede anothers arguement


Hello pot. Meet kettle.

Yes, swarms of early forties men are dying to meet early fifties women.

I wouldn't be interested in meeting you either - fantasy-land is too far away.
 4dutyandhumanity
Joined: 4/20/2007
Msg: 387
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wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 7:13:46 AM

If I see they have an age range on their profile showing less than their own stated age, I will point out to them that they are being hypocritical in not being willing to even consider someone their own age and are seeking someone as much as 8-10 yrs younger...

I very bluntly tell them, if you're not interested in even giving a person your own age an opportunity to get to know, don't ask me to give you a chance either. You don't want to date someone older and while I would, its ARROGANT HYPOCRITES like you I'm not interested in...then I put them on block and wipe the "jerk dust" off my hands and keyboard


Exactly right. And that goes for women too.
 Bikeman_
Joined: 10/8/2005
Msg: 388
wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 7:18:46 AM

Yes, swarms of early forties men are dying to meet early fifties women.
It doesn't take a swarm of men to satisfy one woman. Just one man, one woman. I'm a guy in this demographic and have no issue whatsoever dating a woman in her early fifties, given we have compatible interests and mindsets. Have a nice day!
 NCRosebud
Joined: 2/15/2008
Msg: 389
wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 9:30:08 AM
4dutyandhumanity...I posted on this thread some time ago and still feel strongly that it is one thing to "lie" about your age to attract more views (which I personally would not do, but whatever floats your boat)...however, I feel strongly that once contact is made, the truth should be told RIGHT AWAY. The fact that this went on for so long without the truth being divulged is beyond me.

That being said, OP is giving this relationship another shot. Only he can determine whether his issue was really her age or her lie. It's conjecture for each of us.

However, your comment
Yes, swarms of early forties men are dying to meet early fifties women.
is way off base. I hate to break it to you, but I'm 59 and, on average, am contacted twice a week or more by men in their 30's and 40's ....and probably once a month on average by some in their 20's. I always kindly thank these "young men" for their emails, and inform them I'm looking for a seasoned man, much closer to my own age. Very few go without a protest email or two. I actually added a bold section at the beginning of my profile asking that the younger set not contact me unless they look like George Clooney!

So, don't fool yourself thinking young men don't want older women. Like everything else, it's preference. ...and some may be looking for a sugar mama! ...but definitely, the interest is there for whatever reason.

Rose Mary
 easyoneverything
Joined: 1/27/2008
Msg: 390
wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 11:08:08 AM
"...perhaps some women report themselves as being younger because have found that a significant number of men their own age are rigid, judgemental, set in their own ways as solid as cement, it's their way or the highway...??"

____________________________________________________________

Too True! I find many men in my age group to be quite inflexible. They're looking for a partner to share all of the activities and interests they've posted, but try some of yours? Forget it!

I happen to have posted my real age because I believe that there are some men out there within my age range who are a) not looking for someone half their age and
b) have kept themselves updated and physically attractive. I'd prefer to date a well-preserved 55 year old than an out-of-shape-out-of-date 40 year old any day. But these fish are not plentiful.
 anyoneoutthier
Joined: 3/19/2007
Msg: 391
wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 12:42:31 PM
SHARZI

I am sorry you have had bad meetings with some men over 50 but i am offened by your saying all men over 50 is that way and we are not. i have went out with 3 ladys since my wife passed away and each one has said i was a perfect gentleman, and my daugther tells me I need to act a little bad and its not in me, i dont even know how to act that way so. Just a question if you want to answer if you dont that is ok but is thier something you could be doing to have men act that way? Granted even if you did that dont give them the right to treat that way.
 Sharzi
Joined: 10/6/2007
Msg: 392
wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 5:34:29 PM
4duty wrote:

******I know this is hard to hear ... but you lot having a tough time being attracted to guys your own age ... we're having the same problem with you. Try getting over yourselves.

50 year old bodies, 17 year old attitudes - not pretty. ******


I don't need to get over myself 4duty.... I don't think I'm anything particularly special (to all but the one who will find me so), but I do deserve respect because I treat people the way I would like to be treated.

50 year old men don't have the best bodies either. For me, it has nothing to do with that anyway. Attraction comes more from a smile, the eyes, and a kind and loving nature. I actually prefer stocky men.... don't give a damn about physical imperfection ... but I do care that someone doesn't treat me like I'm beneath him... as you seem to have no problem doing.

Sharzi
 Sharzi
Joined: 10/6/2007
Msg: 393
wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 5:39:18 PM
anyoneouttheir...

I wasn't talking about all men over 50... just the ones I've had the unfortunate misfortune in having gone out with, or anyone who acts like 4duty.

There are always exceptions, and it sounds like you fall into that category.

I'm a really nice person, fun to be around, and very patient and easy going. I have just walked into a restaurant and the guy would be rude to the waitress. After some light conversation, I've had men tell me they didn't like my makeup or felt I was fat, etc. That was totally unwarranted. I would never talk to someone like that.

I'm holding out someone who is a nice guy.

Sharzi
 4dutyandhumanity
Joined: 4/20/2007
Msg: 394
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wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 7:35:40 PM

50 year old men don't have the best bodies either. For me, it has nothing to do with that anyway. Attraction comes more from a smile, the eyes, and a kind and loving nature. I actually prefer stocky men.... don't give a damn about physical imperfection ... but I do care that someone doesn't treat me like I'm beneath him... as you seem to have no problem doing.


Hmmm ... am I the one with a dating age range that ends seven years below my actual age? Nope.


I hate to break it to you, but I'm 59 and, on average, am contacted twice a week or more by men in their 30's and 40's ....and probably once a month on average by some in their 20's.


You know, I live in a college town, full of twenty-somethings. I don't think many of those young ladies are interested in me, and I don't think many of the young men are interested in you. I have no idea what email you're getting, how sincere the inquiries are, or whether they'd turn into dates. I'm from Missouri on this one (ie, show me).

Anyone notice how 'guys over 50 only want to sit on the couch and watch movies' morphed into 'guys over 50 are closed minded'?

And I ain't giving up my comb-over and my polyester leisure suits for nobody.
 ramdael
Joined: 3/29/2008
Msg: 395
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wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/19/2008 8:11:48 PM
sharzi ur on the money i have said 4 a long time that men at this age look like my father haha...but want women hlf their age ...so what to do????? just keep lookin he is somewere and we shall find each other. As 4 beeing rude i dont know if its an age thing or just bad manners? any opinions?????
 ramdael
Joined: 3/29/2008
Msg: 396
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wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/19/2008 8:21:08 PM
4duty.. u realy look like my dad and its not just the polyester its ur energy field ...its hard to find someone at the best of times so when we get older its even harder...but youth is 90% attitude 10% look and age have nothing to do wiz attraction.
 Goddess of dreams
Joined: 5/12/2007
Msg: 397
wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/21/2008 6:09:14 AM
Probably what I am going to say has been covered already.

I just think

1. she must love you so much that for the fear of losing you she kept her real age all these time .... and she must have had a reason …the reason is you leaving her…. And the fact that, you now think you won't be able to reach your goals together because of this age difference...proves she was right…..who is to say you won't reach your goals… but your assumption.


2. if she would’ve told her correct age at the first place the chances of you two getting together probably would have been close to zero. before knowing her age you were interested enough to go all the way to be engaged and now you are not sure, this proves you NEVER would have considered getting to know her if you knew her birth age.


3. She must look much younger than her birth age for you not suspecting it all this time.

4. Probably most people won't give their correct age on most sites for a good reason, "it's not wise to do so".

5. As much as people say age is just a number … don't believe it ... it's really more than a number and people do judge each other or even discriminate because of age.

Only one thing can determine whether you will or will not stay with someone like this lady and that's not her age it's the strength of your love for her ….all the rest is really insignificant.

Another point what if you were her and she was 8 years younger????….do you think she should think and feel the way you do???? Do you think it’s fair if she says it would be harder to reach your goals because of your age?????
 Enchanted107
Joined: 12/10/2007
Msg: 398
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wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/21/2008 6:31:34 AM
ladyc4 wrote:

******perhaps some women report themselves as being younger because have found that a significant number of men their own age are rigid, judgemental, set in their own ways as solid as cement, it's their way or the highway...?? ******


Yup, sharzi/ladyc4. That is my observation too. Why is it that men over 50 act that way? I have just had a run in with one. I find I am having better rapport with younger than 50. It is unfortunate that the reason I am attracted to them is the very reason I should really stay away from them. And yes, if the ladies try to improve in their looks, why is that men, who normally look older than their age, have never bothered?

With exception, I am tired of a father figure.
 4dutyandhumanity
Joined: 4/20/2007
Msg: 399
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wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/21/2008 9:05:42 AM

4duty.. u realy look like my dad and its not just the polyester its ur energy field


Yeah, ramdael - how about y'all post a photo of yourself, so we can see what you look like - a current photo, btw. Or at least one of 'ur' energy field.



And yes, if the ladies try to improve in their looks, why is that men, who normally look older than their age, have never bothered?


What - you want guys to wear make-up? If you mean staying in shape, some people work at keeping themselves in shape, and some don't. That cuts across both genders. Go to the mall and have a look around.
 dave4754
Joined: 1/11/2007
Msg: 400
wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/21/2008 9:17:23 AM
Wow, what an incredible slice of human opinion on this topic of age.
Sharzi,,, I went to your profile and looked it over, you are a very attractive woman and as for your profile well it reads right there that you are not a Barbie. Great, no surprise then when you meet, only a jerk would say you are fat! As for your not recieving emails from people over 50 well again you are up front ... right on!

I posted this as I was really hurt and noone to turn to in the small town i live in. The opinions expressed here helped to make me feel human at least in that I SHOULD still love her as only her age changed. The Fact is though I have been LIED to for a very long time over very intense conversations concerning time, something she has less of than she told me. This takes time to absorb, analyse and why should I when I was so honest with her about everything, she asked about all of MY dates, relationships etc. Where was her honesty, why not be forthright with me.

It is true that if she had told me she was 8 yrs older I probably would not have continued dating her, that would have been my loss as this lady has taught me many things. However, if she would have told me around the first month of our engagement I might have felt better and willing to continue marrying her, other issues since have come up regarding totally honesty and her ability to see things only from her perpective. This and the age are the reasons I regret to say will spell the death knell for this relationship, I am hurt and sorry for any hurt I have caused but we are still talking and she still is a great catch. Age does matter .........to some!

Honesty for the most part seems to matter (as expressed in this thread) TO ALL!! Be honest and good luck fishing, thanks for your comments

Dave
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