| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/15/2008 9:58:41 AM | | No the thought has crossed my mind also when I was asked to move in with someone older. 1st of all she did lie. Once a liar in my book always a liar. It is a big red flag. She is not secure with her self to be honest so feels the need to lie. I say dump her! | |
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| The First Lie is the worst Lie
Posted: 5/15/2008 10:15:24 AM | When someone chooses to lie about their age, even the ones that have a header stating their age and in the body of the text they so, now that you've read this far, I'm really 55...or whatever. If you chose to ignore that this person is a liar and also assume this is an isolated incident, don't go crying to anyone. My experience shows about 20% lie.
Greg | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/15/2008 10:57:36 AM |
4dutyandhumanity, Im curious why you have on your profile....."Actually, you can fib about your age, but phony pictures are just rude" Yet your stance on this thread has remained strong and one quote "You don't like the fact that lying about age matters - well, it does. Be honest or accept the consequences". Ha ha..Busted! Nice catch decent m.. I've tried looking at 4duty's profile, but it's been hidden. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/15/2008 6:22:20 PM |
4dutyandhumanity, Im curious why you have on your profile....."Actually, you can fib about your age, but phony pictures are just rude" Yet your stance on this thread has remained strong and one quote "You don't like the fact that lying about age matters - well, it does. Be honest or accept the consequences".
Easy question to answer. I went through a period where, of four women I met, three had shaved a few years of their ages. Unlike 'Jane', they told me right away, and they'd only subtracted three years. I figured if I was going to be a stickler about age, I might as well give up online dating, since most women seem to be unable to honestly state their ages.
This thread is making me reconsider that - I'm finding the thought of a woman together enough to present herself honestly as being kind of hot. On the other hand, the ladies on this thread, who seem to spend most of their time staring into malfunctioning mirrors (you're aging too, girls), are making 'true love' sound a lot like manipulation. Hey Dave - if you were 61, do you think Jane would be interested in *you*? I doubt it.
As to those who can't find 'appropriate' men their own age: you can have all the momma's boys, and all the clowns who go after older women because women their own age tell them to go to hell. Send decent_m and email and find out which category he falls into. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/15/2008 9:43:43 PM | 4dutyandhumanity wrote:
****** What a self-serving load of b.s. You would think true love doesn't go away just because you're older, given that you're looking for guys substantially younger than your stated age of 50, which you're also lying about. ******
This is exactly why I don't date men over 46 anymore.... nasty, condescending, and angry pretty much sums it up. Instead of simply asking me why I have 50 on my profile or why I date younger men, you choose to attack me instead. I would never treat someone like that, and especially someone I don't know. I have a feeling so many older men are so touchy because women in the age range they're looking for are looking for younger men. But maybe we wouldn't if men over about 45 or 46 were a little bit nicer. Sorry, but I've had my fill of being treated like this by men around my own age. And, I'm not the only one who is experiencing this. All of my friends and women from work are telling me the same thing.
I do have a real problem with men my age because most of them act like you.
Sharzi | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/15/2008 9:55:43 PM | ladyc4 wrote:
******perhaps some women report themselves as being younger because have found that a significant number of men their own age are rigid, judgemental, set in their own ways as solid as cement, it's their way or the highway...?? ******
Thank you!!! Exactly. The attitude of the guy who responded to my post is exactly the sort of thing I come across all the time with men around my age or older.
I date men who are younger because I've never been treated as badly as I have been by men over 46. I promised myself I would never go out with anyone older than that again. I have made exceptions and every time I have, I've been sorry.
I report myself as 50 because the men in the age range I date never seem to search over 50. I tell any man interested the very first time we talk that I'm 53. I'm not ashamed of that or trying to hide it.... just would prefer to come up in searches for men in the age range I prefer.
My experiences with men over 46 have been horrible. I've been called fat right to my face, told they didn't like my makeup or perfume, my hair or even the shoes I wear. Rudeness seems to be the norm. They have been rude to waitresses, impatient in just about every way.
Also, many times men around my age haven't updated their look.... still wearing those huge glasses they bought in the 80's, have the whole combover thing going on, dressing like my father, and I am just not attracted to that. And I'm for sure not attracted to that attitude.
Sharzi | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 5:48:05 AM | ^^^^^^^^^^^^
I know this is hard to hear ... but you lot having a tough time being attracted to guys your own age ... we're having the same problem with you. Try getting over yourselves.
50 year old bodies, 17 year old attitudes - not pretty. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 5:56:18 AM | | I am very honest about my age, and date younger because that is what asks me out. I guess the men I'm meeting are not as superfical about an aging body as you are 4duty. Gee could they actually find something attractive about my personality. I am fit, and active and no I dont date babies, but I do got 10 years younger. An I personally dont have a problem with men my age if they have a positive attitude and dont have remote syndrome. OR A BAD ATTITUDE................ | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 6:30:36 AM |
50 year old bodies, 17 year old attitudes - not pretty.
Why would someone with a less than perfect body and an apparent ancient, outdated attitude throw such stones? *shakes head at the hypocricy*
I'm thinking the Op doesn't appreciate you hijacking this thread with your own totally unyielding agenda. If lying about age bothers you as much as it apparently does, then why not start your own thread about it... where you can insult people under your own time?
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 6:42:39 AM | I can almost understand why a man or woman explicitly posts their age as being different that what it really is. To attract someone who they feel is appropriate. Fine. Age just is a number. But if you think about it, if someone has not included you in their search because you are 53 and they typed in 45-50, you in essence believe you are somehow going to "enlighten" this person.
I think the better strategy is instead of sitting back waiting for someone to contact you, you proactively do the profiling and look for a partner who attracts you. A 53 year old I think is more likely to find an amenable 45-50 year old suitor this way instead of having someone stumble into their profile and then have to explain things.
I might be wrong, I have no evidence on my end because I haven't misrepresented my age and I'm pretty flexible regarding age ranges of women to date. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 6:56:26 AM | ^^ I agree. I don't want to mis-represent. I would rather feel that someone contacted me knowing how old I actually am. However; I understand the premise of this thread and why some of the women do not state an actual age... Some people however, can only see one opinion.. Their Own and are unwilling to concede anothers arguement... Those types, no matter how old, I prefer to keep my distance from.
Edit to 4doodyandinhumanity msg 390... once again, you prove my point! | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 7:08:02 AM | I agree with bikeman and wishes granted and I have my accurate age on my profile because I don't want to have to explain later...I'm not thin so that alone is already a huge "negative" for me where the male fish in this pond are concerned...
I do however, have to agree with Sharzi about men's attitude especially men my own age up to 55...most, not all have a ridiculous list of must have's about age, size, looks when they themselves are certainly not GQ models...
If I see they have an age range on their profile showing less than their own stated age, I will point out to them that they are being hypocritical in not being willing to even consider someone their own age and are seeking someone as much as 8-10 yrs younger...
I very bluntly tell them, if you're not interested in even giving a person your own age an opportunity to get to know, don't ask me to give you a chance either. You don't want to date someone older and while I would, its ARROGANT HYPOCRITES like you I'm not interested in...then I put them on block  and wipe the "jerk dust" off my hands and keyboard 
edit:VVVV4duty Newsflash for you, there are younger men looking for older women...and there are also men that aren't so narrow minded to only think someone younger than them would be suitable to have a relationship with...
you have a right to your own choices; but you don't need to insult anyone and say they are living a fantasy...heck I could say the same thing about men older thinking they can get younger...for some of them, it would be only a fantasy :rolling my eyes at you | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 7:10:59 AM |
Some people however, can only see one opinion.. Their Own and are unwilling to concede anothers arguement
Hello pot. Meet kettle.
Yes, swarms of early forties men are dying to meet early fifties women.
I wouldn't be interested in meeting you either - fantasy-land is too far away. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 7:13:46 AM |
If I see they have an age range on their profile showing less than their own stated age, I will point out to them that they are being hypocritical in not being willing to even consider someone their own age and are seeking someone as much as 8-10 yrs younger...
I very bluntly tell them, if you're not interested in even giving a person your own age an opportunity to get to know, don't ask me to give you a chance either. You don't want to date someone older and while I would, its ARROGANT HYPOCRITES like you I'm not interested in...then I put them on block and wipe the "jerk dust" off my hands and keyboard
Exactly right. And that goes for women too. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 7:18:46 AM |
Yes, swarms of early forties men are dying to meet early fifties women. It doesn't take a swarm of men to satisfy one woman. Just one man, one woman. I'm a guy in this demographic and have no issue whatsoever dating a woman in her early fifties, given we have compatible interests and mindsets. Have a nice day!  | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 9:30:08 AM | 4dutyandhumanity...I posted on this thread some time ago and still feel strongly that it is one thing to "lie" about your age to attract more views (which I personally would not do, but whatever floats your boat)...however, I feel strongly that once contact is made, the truth should be told RIGHT AWAY. The fact that this went on for so long without the truth being divulged is beyond me.
That being said, OP is giving this relationship another shot. Only he can determine whether his issue was really her age or her lie. It's conjecture for each of us.
However, your comment
Yes, swarms of early forties men are dying to meet early fifties women. is way off base. I hate to break it to you, but I'm 59 and, on average, am contacted twice a week or more by men in their 30's and 40's ....and probably once a month on average by some in their 20's. I always kindly thank these "young men" for their emails, and inform them I'm looking for a seasoned man, much closer to my own age. Very few go without a protest email or two. I actually added a bold section at the beginning of my profile asking that the younger set not contact me unless they look like George Clooney!
So, don't fool yourself thinking young men don't want older women. Like everything else, it's preference. ...and some may be looking for a sugar mama!  ...but definitely, the interest is there for whatever reason.
Rose Mary | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 11:08:08 AM | "...perhaps some women report themselves as being younger because have found that a significant number of men their own age are rigid, judgemental, set in their own ways as solid as cement, it's their way or the highway...??"
____________________________________________________________
Too True! I find many men in my age group to be quite inflexible. They're looking for a partner to share all of the activities and interests they've posted, but try some of yours? Forget it!
I happen to have posted my real age because I believe that there are some men out there within my age range who are a) not looking for someone half their age and
b) have kept themselves updated and physically attractive. I'd prefer to date a well-preserved 55 year old than an out-of-shape-out-of-date 40 year old any day. But these fish are not plentiful. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 12:42:31 PM | SHARZI
I am sorry you have had bad meetings with some men over 50 but i am offened by your saying all men over 50 is that way and we are not. i have went out with 3 ladys since my wife passed away and each one has said i was a perfect gentleman, and my daugther tells me I need to act a little bad and its not in me, i dont even know how to act that way so. Just a question if you want to answer if you dont that is ok but is thier something you could be doing to have men act that way? Granted even if you did that dont give them the right to treat that way. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 5:34:29 PM | 4duty wrote:
******I know this is hard to hear ... but you lot having a tough time being attracted to guys your own age ... we're having the same problem with you. Try getting over yourselves.
50 year old bodies, 17 year old attitudes - not pretty. ******
I don't need to get over myself 4duty.... I don't think I'm anything particularly special (to all but the one who will find me so), but I do deserve respect because I treat people the way I would like to be treated.
50 year old men don't have the best bodies either. For me, it has nothing to do with that anyway. Attraction comes more from a smile, the eyes, and a kind and loving nature. I actually prefer stocky men.... don't give a damn about physical imperfection ... but I do care that someone doesn't treat me like I'm beneath him... as you seem to have no problem doing.
Sharzi | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 5:39:18 PM | anyoneouttheir...
I wasn't talking about all men over 50... just the ones I've had the unfortunate misfortune in having gone out with, or anyone who acts like 4duty.
There are always exceptions, and it sounds like you fall into that category.
I'm a really nice person, fun to be around, and very patient and easy going. I have just walked into a restaurant and the guy would be rude to the waitress. After some light conversation, I've had men tell me they didn't like my makeup or felt I was fat, etc. That was totally unwarranted. I would never talk to someone like that.
I'm holding out someone who is a nice guy.
Sharzi | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/16/2008 7:35:40 PM |
50 year old men don't have the best bodies either. For me, it has nothing to do with that anyway. Attraction comes more from a smile, the eyes, and a kind and loving nature. I actually prefer stocky men.... don't give a damn about physical imperfection ... but I do care that someone doesn't treat me like I'm beneath him... as you seem to have no problem doing.
Hmmm ... am I the one with a dating age range that ends seven years below my actual age? Nope.
I hate to break it to you, but I'm 59 and, on average, am contacted twice a week or more by men in their 30's and 40's ....and probably once a month on average by some in their 20's.
You know, I live in a college town, full of twenty-somethings. I don't think many of those young ladies are interested in me, and I don't think many of the young men are interested in you. I have no idea what email you're getting, how sincere the inquiries are, or whether they'd turn into dates. I'm from Missouri on this one (ie, show me).
Anyone notice how 'guys over 50 only want to sit on the couch and watch movies' morphed into 'guys over 50 are closed minded'?
And I ain't giving up my comb-over and my polyester leisure suits for nobody. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 5/19/2008 8:11:48 PM | | sharzi ur on the money i have said 4 a long time that men at this age look like my father haha...but want women hlf their age ...so what to do????? just keep lookin he is somewere and we shall find each other. As 4 beeing rude i dont know if its an age thing or just bad manners? any opinions????? | |
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