| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/11/2008 6:46:00 PM | | I just fell into this topic but I'm going to toss my two cents worth. I personally don't like doritos (please don't hold that against me). As for age.....some say it's a number, but which number one picks shouldn't be one that another wants to hear. I used to always look for an older man (when I was much younger)...now as the years go by, I find somewhat younger men have more energy and more interests in common. Lying about one age is not nearly as bad as lying about being married to someone else If you care about someone and it's mutual then age shouldn't matter (never thought I'd be saying that!!! ) If you find someone you want to spend your life with....then why question the age...but I would question the honesty. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/12/2008 7:52:52 AM | | I think it would depend on the motive behind the lie. Was it a little white lie or deceitful. I don't think that just because she didn't tell you how old she really is would make her untrustworthy. Everyone has lied at one time or another. There's a big difference between a little white lie and deceiving someone. I think if you really love her, you could forgive the little white lie. As far as the age difference, that would be entirely up to you how important that is to you. Are you willing to throw away a good thing because of the age difference. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/12/2008 8:57:30 AM | mmmmmm well my initial view was... "wot's up wi ya you have found yourself a woman who obviously looks good, turns you on and you are happy with" BUT then I start to question well why not admit the age. Afterall age is just a number. I think your issues lie with her not telling you, would you have not dated her if you knew beforehand she was 8 yrs older?
Suppose I would try and understand why but at the end of the day she deceived you, even though not in a sinister way like sleeping with someone else, but it does beg me to question her honesty in the future.
Hope you manage to sort out in your head what is right for you.
Lingerxxx | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/12/2008 9:35:16 AM | If you had met outside of a dating site, their would be no knowledge of her age. You would have to go by initial attraction, chemistry, personality and eventually compatability. Age would not come into play unless it was your attitude towards conforming to societies views of what is "the acceptable age difference". Yes there was a lie about age on her part, but that doesn't mean she is deceiptful in other areas of your relationship, otherwise why would you propose to her. You wouldn't get engaged to someone based solely on their age! Is it the lie, or is it your views about what an acceptable age difference should be between men and women? If I met someone I would rather want to know that they were compatible, or maybe I should ask them their age first, just so I can fit into societies acceptable standards!! NOT.
Maria | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/12/2008 9:41:32 AM | lol. Some lies can seal a relationship.
One of my sisters has always been selfconsious of her age, and always looked younger than she was. My brother introduced her to one of his friends (now her husband) who is 7 yrs younger. They saw each other a few times and the age thing came never came up. But my sister started to really like this guy.
The way she tells it, she was standing on the deck at his cottage one night trying to get the nerve to tell him that he was too young for her. She was sure he'd run once he found out how old she was. She was 46 and she figured he was about 35, so she just blurted it out. "I'm 46 years old." he said "So, I'm 31." lol. Apparently, he had to catch her from falling off the deck!  | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/12/2008 11:28:08 AM | | Many people would think they are lucky to find someone who loves them and they in return love. Love doesn't come along with an age limit. If your uncomfortable with her age, she would be lucky if you walked away. You said she looked younger, well in case you haven't noticed. The trend is a younger guy with an older women. Why did she lie? Maybe she could tell you were not comfortable with her age. I "lied" one time, I came clean shortly into the relationship, he was fine with it. Guess he was there because of me, not what others might think of him being with a women older than him. I am sure you know the term MILF well I think you found one and she won't be alone long. You hold yourself up pretty high, you have NEVER lied? If you were less than honest did you want to be forgiven? If not, toss her out the next man will love her too. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/12/2008 2:30:21 PM | | At the start if you new then for me age would have been no big deal. But the lying yeah big deal. Sorry but were old enough now to know better. By know we know it hurts. Look how long she new and loved you so much not to tell you. Something to really think about.. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/12/2008 5:14:40 PM | A woman who lies about her age is misrepresenting a material fact. She is perpetrating a fraud. If she lies about her age she can and will lie about other serious facts about herself.
Do you really want to be in a relationship with a liar wondering whether she is telling the truth about being "out with the girls", how much she is spending, and so on? | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/12/2008 5:26:23 PM | The trend is a younger guy with an older women. Some people aren't influenced by trends. This isn't a "trend" anyway; it's sort of being promoted by the entertainment industry, it's basically a distorted feel-good story to sell to older women.
If you were less than honest did you want to be forgiven? If not, toss her out the next man will love her too. I can't see any guy "loving" a woman who lied when answering basic fundamental questions. At best a guy will "tolerate" her. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/12/2008 5:59:08 PM |
A woman who lies about her age is misrepresenting a material fact. She is perpetrating a fraud. If she lies about her age she can and will lie about other serious facts about herself.
Do you really want to be in a relationship with a liar wondering whether she is telling the truth about being "out with the girls", how much she is spending, and so on? Oh lighten up guys.
I wouldn't give two shits if a woman lies about her age unless it's warped. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/12/2008 6:08:36 PM |
t is extremely rare for a person to lie about one subject, and one subject only, and to be completely truthful about everything else.
So how about if a guy lies about his height? What if he says he is 5' 9" and you are 5' 6"--when you meet him, you wear three inch heels and tower over him like an Amazon.
Once a liar, always a liar? | |
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lucela
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Joined: 5/23/2008
Msg: 437 | |
| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/12/2008 6:09:20 PM | | u honestly have to ask yourself do you love her any less because of this? The lying is a major deal breaker but in my eyes it is over something petty, eight years is nothing in the grand scheme of things. She possibly felt she had to lie, maybe she liked you that much that she was scared to tell the truth in case you werent interested or she felt insecure about her age. At the end of the day she loves you and you love her and that should be enough x | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/12/2008 6:18:40 PM | | It depends on how entertaining it will be to listen to more of her BS during the rest of the date...... but these days mostly... if someone from online has misrepresented themselves... I will just say never mind and split. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/12/2008 6:49:01 PM |
So how about if a guy lies about his height? What if he says he is 5' 9" and you are 5' 6"--when you meet him, you wear three inch heels and tower over him like an Amazon. That's a different scenario than what was presented here in this thread. The OP's lady misrepresented her age for 1 1/2 years, six months of which were during engagement. Of course a lady can exercise height prejudice if a guy lies about his height and she notes upon meeting that he is shorter than her "requirements". One professed early white lie is one thing--perpetuated lie is different issue. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/12/2008 7:03:37 PM |
One professed early white lie is one thing--perpetuated lie is different issue.
Ah, I see--there are graduations of lies. Gotcha. If a man lies about his height, OF COURSE he wouldn't lie about anything else. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/12/2008 7:38:02 PM | | When I was 30, I dated a woman who stated she was single when she really was divorced. That's a white lie. She was concerned a 30 year old guy didn't want to get involved with a divorcee. She told me this on our 2nd date. I dismissed it and requested that she need not hide facts like this from me, I liked her for who she was right now. It's not a graduation of lies, it's a matter of effectively communicating what one's dealbreakers are, and giving someone an opportunity to change, looking for a different behavior pattern. I was flattered that after that 2nd date, we shared lots of great thoughts and great times with each other on subsequent dates. The guy who lies about his height likely does that because he experiences lots of knee-jerk rejection; still that's not a great strategy for a shorter than average guy. He likely isn't going to get much further than a 1st date with that misrepresentation. Without somebody doing a background check or rifling through one's personal belongings, it's lots easier for a person to deceive their partner about their age well past a first date, in this instance for 1 1/2 years and six months of engagement. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/12/2008 8:07:03 PM | Her real age in itself doesn't change her as the person you fell in love with, what's changed is your perception or image of who you think she is.
Or maybe who you wanted her to be.
She found herself trapped in her lie about her age. She sensed early on your potential disapproval of her white lie, as time went by the truth became harder to admit to.
No doubt many hints were dropped which showed her what your reaction to her lie would be when it came to light, which prevented her from admitting she'd knocked several years off her age.
Your reaction when she finally did confess is predictable. She knew and expected to be dumped and she was.
So why post on here, you obviously got the result you were hoping for. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/12/2008 8:38:59 PM | | Why are all the old...sorry, older women on here so defensive about this topic. The poster above makes a lot of ASSumptions. Perhaps, like many women, she is insecure about her age and chose to lie right off the bat and then got stuck in a lie because she lacks moral character. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/12/2008 8:57:12 PM | | I have a big issue with lying all together. I met a jerk on here in March who claimed to be 51 years old - I'm 46. We "dated" for just over 2 months and I found out that he lied about his age via the Internet. Ah, the Internet...such a marvelous invention. We haven't been seeing one another since the end of March - he dumped me for someone he met on here who dumped him before he started seeing me. I was the "rebound" girlfriend. While he was dumping me, I confronted him about his age and he said that he did it because he looked and felt younger - feel younger I can see, look younger, I don't think so. He had that crepey, elderly skin - he shouldn't have that type of skin at the age of 51 - I know plenty of men around that age and their skin isn't like that. I'm pretty sure that he was over the age of 60 or almost 60 - this is per the site I found his information on. He didn't tell me what his true age was. I really didn't have an issue with his age - it was the lying. (He calls them "white lies".) So the point is that, once they lie about one thing, it makes you wonder what else they lied or will lie to you about. BTW, he's a part-time actor and NO ONE trusts them! | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/12/2008 10:35:02 PM | The issue I have would not be the fact she fibbed about her age, because obviously the age thing doesn't matter because you didn't realize how old she really was.
What bothers me is the lie.
It's one thing to lie about it... like maybe for a week or something, testing the waters and what not and then come clean. But she waited a long time [till your proposal or marriage?] that's too dang long.
If she lied about that, was else has she lied about? What else is she waiting to tell you? | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/13/2008 7:06:01 AM | Age is literally a number EXAMPLE: girl meets a guy who is 25 she adores him and he adores her she is only say 19 she says she is 22 I MEAN C'MON IF LYING ABOUT AGE IS THE ONLY THING YOU GOTTA WORRY ABOUT DON'T STRESS!!!.... could be alot worse it's when they lie about where they have been who they been with that is the concern so if it is only a lil few years she/he probably only lied to be with you as they knew you may think different it doesn't change how people feel towards one another as long as it aint no pedofile type shiet then go for it if it is only like 5 years who knows you could be with your future wife/husband YOU WILLING TO LOSE THAT?????? go for it sus it all out make sure that's the only thing they lied about and if the feelings strong make it work and make it official when the time is right thats just how I would act in this situation don't take my advice personally as my advice has only landed me with immature silly cheating girls do what you want
I truly hope all of our advices are usefull and you choose a result that bests suits you both....
OBSENE..... | |
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to me it would be a deal breaker. But....You have to do what you feel is best. 
