| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/13/2008 7:06:01 AM | Age is literally a number EXAMPLE: girl meets a guy who is 25 she adores him and he adores her she is only say 19 she says she is 22 I MEAN C'MON IF LYING ABOUT AGE IS THE ONLY THING YOU GOTTA WORRY ABOUT DON'T STRESS!!!.... could be alot worse it's when they lie about where they have been who they been with that is the concern so if it is only a lil few years she/he probably only lied to be with you as they knew you may think different it doesn't change how people feel towards one another as long as it aint no pedofile type shiet then go for it if it is only like 5 years who knows you could be with your future wife/husband YOU WILLING TO LOSE THAT?????? go for it sus it all out make sure that's the only thing they lied about and if the feelings strong make it work and make it official when the time is right thats just how I would act in this situation don't take my advice personally as my advice has only landed me with immature silly cheating girls do what you want
I truly hope all of our advices are usefull and you choose a result that bests suits you both....
OBSENE..... | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/13/2008 9:50:44 AM | Lies---people have different viewpoints but the bottom line is if someone feels the need to lie to you before they met you...then they have issues they should resolve.
Met a man on here who said he was in his early 50's. His yahoo profile had him at 61 when I asked all at once I became the bad guy..the usual POF had messed up his age and then he couldnt change it.
Then he said that some people wont consider you if you are in your sixties, Well isnt that their right? If someone wants to limit their possibility to finding someone by age....then to me it is their right to be shallow. Sometimes you can forget you are a year older etc...but this guy was 8 years older, we spend 20 min one night after he brought up the subject of people being older than their pictures..he was telling me how the pictures were within the last year. He is a good example about how if they lie about age then they will keep lying to you. He said he was new to the site and wasnt sure he liked it, that he hadnt met anyone. A few days after the age thing this woman posted a testimonial about what a great kisser he was.
I met another man, outdated picture who said he was 57, but the more I talked to him the older he sound, his taste in music, age of his son (43) etc. then he made up a myspace profile and listed his age as 55, when I asked him he said it was just age and didnt matter..if someone will lie about a FACT, age, height, maritial status...they will lie about anything, imagine what they will say about how they feel!
I just dont understand the concept of trying to rope someone in with lies...if you met the person and like them you will always be torn about their honesty. I cant imagine how it would feel to met someone and then have them not like you based not on what you lied about but the fact you lied, lies would seem to be counterproductive. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/13/2008 10:50:18 AM | Age is just a number!!!
U must love her to propose to her.
I think u can love and embrace that shes older than you are.
When I was 14 I told a guy I was 18 it really blew up in my face but we stayed together for 3 years.
Now looking back Im going to be 22 and hes going to be 29 this year it doesnt seem to matter as much.
Im usually with guys 7-10 years older it doesnt affect much. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/13/2008 2:20:03 PM | | I married my x in 1980 thinking she was one year older then I was. As time went on questions would come up, drivers license, passports, etc. Finally she admitted being eight years older. For me, the actual number wasn't nearly as important as the lie. If a person would lie about something so trivial, do you really want to hitch your wagon to them for life not knowing what other lies might come? | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/13/2008 4:47:20 PM | Hey Bikeman I am confused:
"Of course a lady can exercise height prejudice if a guy lies about his height and she notes upon meeting that he is shorter than her "requirements". One professed early white lie is one thing--perpetuated lie is different issue."
Just because the height thing is no biggie to you doesn't mean it isn't exactly the same thing here. The only difference that I can see is that once you meet him you're pretty sure he's not 5'9" for obvious reasons! Not so if a woman is 8 years older and looks 10 years younger.
So when men are caught in a blatant lie that they cannot hide, women are exercising 'height prejudice" but when women admit a lie they told out of some sense of integrity (eventually at least) she's a damn liar and never to be trusted again? Hmmm, seems a bit of a double standard to me. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/13/2008 5:08:48 PM | "LIES"
Performed and written by The Knickebockers 1965
Lies, lies, you're tellin' me that you'll be true
Lies, lies
That's all I ever hear from you
Tears, tears
I shed a million tears for you
Tears, tears
And now you're lovin' someone new
Someday I'm gonna be happy
But I don't know when just now
Lies, lie-ies
A-breakin' my heart
You think that you're such a smart girl
And I'll believe what you say
But who do you think you are, girl
To lead me on this way hey
Lies, lies
I can't believe a word you say
Lies, lies
Are gonna make you sad someday
Some day you're gonna be lonely
But you won't find me around
Lies, lie-ies
A-breakin' my heart
Someday I'm gonna be happy
But I don't know when just now
Lies, lie-ies
A-breakin' my heart
You think that you're such a smart girl
And I'll believe what you say
But who do you think you are, girl
To lead me on this way hey
Lies (ah!), lies (yeah baby)
I can't believe a word you say
Lies, lies
Are gonna make you sad someday
Some day you're gonna be lonely
But you won't find me around
Lies, lie-ies
A-breakin' my heart
I said, baby, now (breakin' my heart)
Oh, yeah, you're still breakin' my heart (breakin' my heart | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/14/2008 12:58:24 PM | Wow! this topic has gone on for 19 pages. LOL Just thought I'd throw in my .2 pesos. Since the OP has decided to continue his relationship with that woman says something, that being that he has gotten over it. But what I have a problem with are the posters here who seem to view what she did as some kind of high crime. LOL C'mon people there are far worst things that she could've hidden from him like being a fugitive felon, not being divorced, or worst. Those are issues that have far more devastating consequences than lying about her age. Since we don't have her side of the story, we don't know why she didn't tell him her "true" age. But I'm willing to play devil's advocate here and say that maybe the men in her age category are not what she's looking for (obviously) or maybe it's because men are always looking for younger (which is all relative I guess) than themselves. Sixties and 70s years olds can be healthy, but maybe she's not ready to be a nurse to someone and wants to be able to spend far more time having fun with her man than being his nurse.
Some men in their 40s and 50s are looking for the 20-30 somethings and would not even entertain the thought of a woman who is in her 60's even if she does take care of herself. The fact that the OP couldn't tell the difference is an indication that this woman looked much younger than 62. Believe me, if you really love someone the fact that she's 8 or even 10 years older shouldn't matter. The only time that should hurt the relationship is if the guy was looking to have children and obviously both of them are out of the baby-making years (well, a guy can always father kids if he has lots of swimmers LOL). Lying about health, marital status, financial status, criminal past or whatever is far worst, folks.   | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/14/2008 1:03:21 PM | ^ Oh sure it's fine to base a serious relationship on a lie, especially if otherwise he wouldn't be interested in her. She only deceived him because she liked him, and wanted to build a life together. Once she had him too emotionally involved to adhere to his basic common sense, she did the moral thing of course, which was to come clean. She deceived for him months, because she cared.
I would be fine with it, as long as she doesn't mind that I lied about being rich, single, and not addicted to a stripper named Chastity.
8 years? couldn't she have gone for a more conservative lie - say 4 years.. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/14/2008 1:16:52 PM | hmm I know there is a difference between...body age and real age. Perhaps in body age you are older then her...
she did fess up and tell you at the expense of possibly the relationship, give her that.
the rest is up to you and how much you love her. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/16/2008 9:17:46 AM | | Who cares age is irelevent if your happy with her enjoy your time together otherwise if your going to fixate on a silly number let her go and be happy with someone who likes her for her and not her age....... | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/21/2008 4:41:25 AM | OP....ummm...unless you are on autopilot..how did she maintain the fiction of being eight years younger than she actually is?
To have done thatm she would have had to tell numerous lies and not have you met any members of her immediate family (including her children,if any).
IMHO, the problems in your relationship are more related to the lack of communication between the two of you than just her penchant for deception alone.
She may have been able to initially "fool" you into thinking that she was younger...but for her to have maintained that deception in a relationship long enough for things to get the engagement stage,tells me that the two of you apparently rarely talk about serious matters.
Or if you do, that those discussions are likely tense and very short-term.
Bottom Line...you both need counseling ASAP for things to go forward.
If the counseling works,maybe the relationship will. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/21/2008 10:46:44 AM |
So when men are caught in a blatant lie that they cannot hide, women are exercising 'height prejudice" but when women admit a lie they told out of some sense of integrity (eventually at least) she's a damn liar and never to be trusted again? Hmmm, seems a bit of a double standard to me. No double standard. A guy lieing about his height and a woman lieing about her age are both liars. The guy's lie is usually readily apparent unless he is wearing lifts. The woman's lie isn't readily apparent. Nonetheless they are both lies. A woman exercising height prejudice often prevents her from finding a compatible partner, much like a guy (or a woman for that matter) exercising age prejudice.
Never said the woman lieing about her age is never to be trusted again. Find where I said that--you made that up. That is a judgment call for anyone. The bigger issue is the continued lie. Personally I don't think it's a big deal. I recommended to the OP to carefully consider all his girlfriend's personal qualities, the qualities that initially attracted him to her, before making a rash decision.
The liar rationalizes their lie one way or the other. They aren't meeting enough potential dates, so they embellish their demographics. Of course it's best not to lie. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/21/2008 11:06:11 AM | Wow, what a kick-ass liar.
I didn't see where you said how long you'd been together, but hey.. after all the time you spent together.. considering you've proposed... it's amazing to me that she never once slipped up in conversation with regards to her age.
That there is a talent for lying, I think. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/21/2008 1:30:50 PM | If one lies about age, maybe one lies about smoking. Or using drugs. Or being married. Or having a disease. Or...whatever.
Would I tell a dying person that "everything will be okay" to help soothe? Sure. Not here, though. Telling lies is not okay in matters of the heart. Trust is needed.
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/21/2008 3:45:12 PM | You cant avoid the fact that she has lied to you.
So, if she has told one lie then she is dishonest.
So, how many other lies has she told ?
I think I would be letting her go and finding someone who is more honest. | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/21/2008 4:31:06 PM |
98% of women lie about their age and weight. Its expected.
Being common doesn't make it right. And in all honesty, those who think it's expected probably deserve to be lied to. More often than not, people only get away with what you let 'em.
If it's so easy to lie about something silly like age.. you can bet they'd have no trouble lyin about other more vital things.
Be happy you have someone socially functional.
Lying does not make one socially functional.. the need to lie in and of itself makes them obviously unable to socially function without fibbing. | |
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| what if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/21/2008 5:01:44 PM | I could not have said it better!
I see things in black and white. And it amazes me how people are downplaying a lie! After reading most of these post, you can certainly tell who may or may not have a problem telling "fibs" (((cough)))
Signed,
53, proud of it and lovin it! | |
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| wat if she lied about age....... do you continue anyway?
Posted: 6/21/2008 5:18:12 PM | Hey Dave, I had a similar experience when I met a woman on line, in a chat room, back in the days when real people went there to actually meet people.
We exchanged photos and I must say she was so very beautiful. We also moved on to talking on the phone, and she had the most beautiful Italian accent. This went on for months. We didn't see each other right away as I lived on the east coast and she on the west.
But we talked each day on the phone, and the more I talked to her the more I fell in love with her. So eventually I wanted to meet her, as she had expressed the same love for me as I felt for her.
So we made plans for me to fly to California within a couple of weeks. Then she started to act funny about my coming to see her. She confided that the photos she sent were not of her, but of her sister who had passed away several years before.
I told her that I fell in love, not with her photo, but with her. I asked that she send me a real photo, which she did. Regardless to say, she was not an attractive woman, although she did have lovely eyes. She was overweight, with bucked teeth. She just was not the type of woman I would have ever been interested in at first blush.
But then I started to ask myself was I so shallow that looks were more important than the person I had come to love. After much soul searching, I decided that I was not the kind of man who would be so shallow as to reject a wonderful, kind, funny, intelligent woman, simply because she did not look like a supermodel.
We met and it was the most wonderful, and exciting time of my life. She was so wonderful to be with and I was completely at ease with her, in public and in private as well. She was a wonderful lover, and a great person to be around in any situtation.
We spend the better part of two years together, but then my financial situation changed, and I could not longer afford to court her long distance, and her job make it impossible for her and her family to move east.
Regretably, we had to let things go. I still think of her and we do check in with each other from time to time. But I found out something very important about myself. I am not a shallow person and when I tell you that intelligence, wit and a sense of humor are more important than good looks, then you can believe me. Good luck with your decision.
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I could see if it was a few years ..like say She said she was 58 or somthin...........but that's stretching it a bit pumpkin.
