| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/8/2008 6:03:49 AM | | Juliet... Hospice in my area does offer home health care. A doctor just has to declare them within 6 months of death to qualify for the program. The LBD Caregiver Group I belong to online has the Hospice document that a doctor has to fill out, to get a patient into the program. Mother is not eligible for Hospice yet. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/8/2008 6:29:54 AM | wondering1960.....Your 28? Wow you have so much growing up to do.
springazure.....Seems it different down here. Hospice is usually a place where a dying person lives out their remaining time ( For the terminally ill). We do have 'at home services' which is the field that I work in where we help the client on a day to day basis.
I must add that this whole thing must be very difficult for you. Good on you for caring for your mother.  | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/8/2008 6:34:25 AM | um juliet...
where do you get the idea to knock me for having a morbid sense of humor??? back off i never said anything to you lady don't insult me ever again
frigging ppl | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/8/2008 6:52:32 AM |
that be wicket....was the body bloody? ......How is that humorous? Like I said you need to grow up. Don't insult YOU? YOU insulted the poster, sorry but it's NOT a laughing matter.
Back to the OP.....Why did you choose the field of work that you are engaged in? Were you not told of the things you may endure? As I said IF you can't handle your type of work then you need to find other employment. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/8/2008 7:50:54 AM | might wanna start getting use 2 ur position as a healthcare provider my dear..
the first time i had 2 clean someone after they passed on (many yrs ago).. i almost fainted.. told my boss at the time 'if this person moves or reaches out & grabs me.. i`m outta here!'.. since then i have gotten many deceased clients/residences prepped & ready '2 go' 2 the morgue.. in time u`ll get use 2 it blonde.. have no choice right?!..
oh i hafta ask.. what does moving back 2 spain & getting out 2 see the world hafta do w/cleaning a dead body?..  .. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/8/2008 8:01:43 AM |
Is someone going to have to wash her down?
do u have someone from a home health care agency (preferably someone on a palliative care team) coming in 2 help u out spring?.. if so.. then that person would be responsible 4 getting ur mother ready when she passes on.. at least thats what i had 2 do when i was on the palliative care team.. i was called in when the person was in the final stage of their life 2 provide them w/ care & give them comfort right up until the very end.. and plz don`t feel 'morbid' 4 asking a question like that..  .. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/8/2008 9:43:28 AM | | Hospice here at least has always offered in home care. And these days they are not just caring for terminally ill pts. They are starting to kind of branch out. There are still criteria that need to be met, and it is a little different than a regular home health care agency, but now (again, here at least), pts don't always have to be terminal and with a 6 mo prognosis. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/8/2008 4:51:03 PM |
Hospice I don't believe actually work outside of their hospice. A hospice is a place where people live out their dying time.....
With all due respect juliet, hospice is not a place, it is an organisation that provides services for the terminally ill. Criteria for hospice admission varies from state to state, but basically the services provided should be the same, to care for those who are terminally ill until they pass away.......... | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/9/2008 2:21:10 AM |
With all due respect juliet, hospice is not a place .....Arha! I understand now! It's a different country different name for things I guess. Hospice downunder is a place or should I say a number of places where the terminally ill are cared for until they pass. I actually work for a company who does the home visiting where we send nurses, care aids, physio's etc etc to the persons home. The more needy even have care aids who sleep over at the persons home.
No worries.....just different names for different things! | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/9/2008 2:30:21 AM |
What would you do in my situation?
Learn to grow up! I'm normally more understanding but as london lass said you entered into health care knowing you are going to see and deal with all sorts...it goes with the job!
If I were working alongside you I'd be concerned with the vibe and attitude you are passing onto those you are meant to be caring for (and their relatives).
Take a few days off, go somewhere on your own (away from your usual haunts) and actually take the time to think about what you do want in life, and can do.
Good luck. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/10/2008 10:14:35 PM | It will be entirely your choice. I did it for my mother, my grandmother and my aunt, as the last sign of my respect and love for them. I also dressed them, fixed their hair and put on some make up before they went to be cremated.
You may find you want to, or you may be to overwhelmed to do it. It's all variable on what happens towards the end and how you feel. Do not let anyone make you feel bad about your choice, but think carefully about it. You won't get that second chance.
Often with dementia, unless there is a terminal situation on the table, hospice may not be around to be there to help. This is sad, but it is the reality. I pray you have good friends and family to help you get through it. Don't be afraid to reach out for as much support as you can, and try to make sure you have time daily for yourself. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/10/2008 10:40:17 PM | Unlike the movies you have watched, the dead patient will not get up and eat you, not tonight, not EVER! A dead person is a lot more harmless than certain alive ones! Why don't you get to work, save some money and travel the world like you wish, if your parents are not willing to cough up the money? Life is what you make it dear!
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/11/2008 2:53:15 AM | | when i was 17, my mother died of lung cancer. i was in the room when she died, and it didn't really affect me. i was waiting for something profound, but nothing happened. people react differently to situations, but its not weird to have a heightened sense of your own mortality, after experiencing a death. death is something that we have desensitized ourselves with through modern media, but its also something that we have kept to a minimum through religion and whatnot. its no surprise that every modern religion offers some form of afterlife, while previous religions just didn't. it's hard to comprehend that one day we won't be here, but its a good thing to have something like this happen because it makes the little things matter even less, and it helps you to redirect your thoughts to the things that you really do want to accomplish. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/23/2008 12:02:09 PM | | op i can't see your problem. i sat in a room while a woman died when i was 18 and it' upset me yes but it's another persons tradgedy not mina...i think ur bahaviour seems abit extreme. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/25/2008 6:06:54 AM | | springazure-jump over to the australian forum and check out pookies very detailed and very compassionate thread on all things to do with dying etc | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/25/2008 9:14:35 AM | My best friend is a social worker and she describes to me in detail the neglect of some of her clients. The open liesons and bed sores that she has to examine and report. Some people are so large they cannot leave home and the nurses dont clean them properly.
I do wildlife rehab and rescue so death has been a part of my kids life as long as they can remember. My daughter is going to be a mortician and a great business women with quite customers. The first one is always the hardest but you should look at being a florist if death hits you this hard. You will see the dead after they are clean and made up. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/25/2008 2:19:46 PM | I agree with london lass
You took the last respectful act toward another human being, and made it all about you.
If you cannot perform your job with dignity and compassion, you need to get out of there girl.
If what comes around, goes around, Maybe someone will be traumatized while cleaning your body for the last time and be grossed out by it. I wouldnt have the patience to have you working under me. It takes a special person to work with dying people, the elderly, disabled and sick. I dont think your special enough. | |
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Naamah
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Joined: 11/22/2007
Msg: 47 | |
| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/26/2008 2:28:34 AM |
Seems it different down here. Hospice is usually a place where a dying person lives out their remaining time ( For the terminally ill). We do have 'at home services' which is the field that I work in where we help the client on a day to day basis.
Juliet, I nursed my husband at home until his death because he didn't want to die in a hospital, and I'm in Australia, and it was definitely a hospice that assisted us. Karuna Hospice in Brisbane.
We got a referral through the palliative care section of the hospital, but the hospice itself was a private organisation who provide an entirely free service and rely on donations to do what they do. They did offer a bed with them if need be, but they still called the at-home service 'hospice care'. They probably did the same sort of thing you do...sent a nurse daily to check my husband's pain pump, or more than daily if we struck any difficulties with anything, they taught me what to watch for and what to do for him and how to do it, and they coached me on what to expect, they provided medications (although some we still had to get scripts for through the hospital but they would tell me what they needed), they equipped us with nursing paraphanalia like a bowel kit even before I knew we'd need such a thing and basically set us up with all we'd need. They had 24 hour phone assistance available to nurses and doctors, and they instructed me on their required record-keeping. They were absolutely brilliant!
I am sure they would have come and washed him had we asked, but his favourite Aunt(a retired nurse) asked me if she could wash him as a last caring act. She chatted to him lovingly as tears rolled down her face, calling him darling, and it was one of the most touching things I have ever seen a person do for another person. I am glad it wasn't done by some anonymous stranger who was all freaked out about 'washing a dead patient'. (No offence OP...just how I feel about it..and yes I think you might be more suited to a different career.) Also, as per an earlier comment, we were not required to have police in attendance after his death at home given the situation...just a GP to verify death.
To the lady nursing her Mum at home...definitely enlist the help of people who do this sort of thing to prepare you and guide you. After my experience I would say that caring for your loved one til the last is one of the most significant things life will ever ask of you. It's hard... for me the hardest thing I have ever done...but far from being a burden it was the most worthwhile thing I have ever done for another person, to be able to let him live out the last of his life as he wanted. Some of the experiences we shared in those last weeks were the types of human to human connection we don't share very often in our sanitised and institutionalised world. Personally I think of it as an honour that my husband had that much faith in me that he trusted me to look after him when he was at his most vulnerable...him putting himself in my hands so trustingly was every bit as great an act of love as it was for me to care for him.
jump over to the australian forum and check out pookies very detailed and very compassionate thread on all things to do with dying
That's one of the most useful and compassionate threads I have ever seen. Pookie is an amazing woman. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/26/2008 3:29:27 AM | Helping with a persons preparation for the afterlife is a privelage. Would you have been as unset if you had to wash a unresponsive person, severly disabled person, or quadraplegic.
I think your a brat | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/26/2008 1:35:22 PM | OP you know that when you wash a body you become a conduit of sort for the decedent's journey to the afterlife. There have been stories of spirits who don't fully channel through their washer, leaving a little bit of themselves behind. Some body-washers have been known to take a whole new personality and establish new mannerisms as a result of the decedent's spirit establishing itself inside their new host. So be aware of this acclimation process. Good luck and I hope this person was a tender, loving person or you may be needing an exorcist rather than a counselor. | |
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