| do men REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys?
Posted: 5/7/2008 9:42:48 AM | Probably already stated. (who has time to read all the responses) but there's a woman for every man and visa virsa. The problem comes when you're attracted to men who aren't attracted to you.
Some men love a woman to do what he does and love it. To me that's ideal, but others would prefer one who does girly while he does guy things.
Who knows what makes us all what we are and think the way we do?
The good news is, there's a drop dead hot guy who'd die to be with you right now. The bad news is he's on another dating site and lives 3000 miles away. | |
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| do men REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys?
Posted: 5/7/2008 10:28:37 AM | > (OP) I've always in advance warned my dates of this
Right, everyone just loves dates which start out with a warning statement (or an ultimatum). Really gets things off on the right foot...
He/them is probably waiting somewhat anxiously for the other shoe to drop, to get the true downside of dating you, because something like a warning is really a promise. Hence the walking-on-eggshells response. No one knows where the trip wires are unless you give them the complete map to the minefield. Best just to keep you at arms length and hope to avoid the possible consequences.
If you're really Ok with having a "strong personality" and being a "tomboy", why would you be issuing warnings in the first place?
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| do men REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys?
Posted: 5/7/2008 10:39:01 AM |
I hear you guys say it all the time, but is it true? I am very upfront , very honest and can be crass at times Then there are those who wear their crude and cruel attitude like a badge of honor. We--men, in general--don't play dat. You're from NYC; I lived there for a few years. You will forever have difficulty if you apply that tough-as-nails persona that NYers love to brandish and apply it to people and situations in other parts of the country/world. It just won't fly in Atlanta, for example, nor in Montreal (even though they are much like NYers than they wish to admit).
There's a fuzzy line between strong, as in pronounced, and strong, as in Limberger. Don't be the latter; a sexual diet limited to tits and clits is great for a guy, but might be stultifying for a woman, tomboy or not.
As far as hangin' with a woman that's a surrogate male friend, no thanks...I can get a male friend whenever I want, complete with the belching, farting, ball-scratching, f-wording, sport-watching-opinionated cuss...don't get me wrong, I like a woman who enjoys what I enjoy, but there's a limit. Further, I've noticed that this kind of woman has a real tough time engaging and talking true feelings. She usually covers it up by being tough/guylike. I figure that any woman who has more difficulty expressing her emotions than your average dude...not a good sign. | |
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| do men REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys?
Posted: 5/7/2008 10:45:59 AM |
as long as you dont pee standing up its cool~
True dat. Dudes made me sign an afidavit that I will never pee standing up before they approved my honorary membership in the ManClub (so that I can post on this board).
On a serious note, strong personality and being tomboy are two rather different things... You say that you are blunt... sometimes there is a danger of being too blunt.
I am all for honesty, but one can be honest without hurtig feelings of other people.
Honesty and respect, that's a combo that most of the (sane) people won't have a problem with.
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| do men REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys?
Posted: 5/7/2008 10:52:37 AM |
As far as the tomboy thing, I have said it once and I will say it again, for me a complete tomboy isn't attractive. A tomboy that went a little girly is ideal for me. If you can get ready in 10 minutes to go for a hike or something like that one time and be able to clean up well and carry off a nice dress, done up hair, makeup, etc to be girly when the situation calls for it. If you don't have the ability to show your feminitiy and show your sexuality then a guy will naturally put you in the friends bucket because you don't show up on the attractiveness radar
I have to agree with this. I am a tomboy...grew up living on a farm and was the only girl.
Now I know how to work on my car, and use just about any power tool handed to me. But sometimes you also need to takea step back and tone down the tomboy. I know when to let a man help me....because just like any other human being in this world, they want to feel wanted and needed.
I can dress up when the occassion calls for it, and if it is something I am doing for the man I am with, I actually do it with a smile on my face, because I feel like I am giving something special to him.
I also don't have a problem in telling a man what I need or want out of a relationship, but in a respectful manner. I am always concious of the effect my words and actions will have on someone else.
I suspect it may be more with your personality coming through ...the way you word things, the way you carry yourself. I am a tomboy and while it was rough going in my 20's, at 42 I am having no problems finding wonderful men to date. | |
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| do men REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys?
Posted: 5/7/2008 11:19:45 AM | | I have nothing against it. I prefer it. IMO it shows your more grounded and not high maintainence. You have no problem with getting your hands dirty and can call it how you see it. Besides something about a woman who is comfortable with a cap and jeans when its time "to go out" is hot to me. | |
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| do men REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys?
Posted: 5/7/2008 11:57:33 AM | No. We're all immature little pusses who can't stand a woman with a brain. Despite saying over and over every time this topic comes up that we like strong women (not to be confused with cranky jerks with inflated senses of self-importance and abusive attitudes) we're really lying to you, and will eventually admit the "truth" if you just keep asking until we tell you what you "know" is actually true.
Happy? | |
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| do men REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys?
Posted: 5/7/2008 2:42:44 PM | | I love women with strong personalities because we always have something to talk about even if most of the time we might be debating. I feel that having a woman with a strong personality helps me stay on my toes and makes me a better person. As far as tomboys, they're awesome. You know that if you want to go hoop or something, they won't mind doing it with you or even watching. They also understand how important watching football on Saturday, Sunday, and Monday Night are for us. | |
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| do men REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys?
Posted: 5/7/2008 2:53:57 PM | Some guys do REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys. Some men REALLY don't. Some mend pretend to REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys because it gets them laid. Some men find some women that REALLY adopt the behaviors of a strong personality and tomboys in order to mask deeper feelings of insecurity as well as to feel part of their immediate social group and who really only want a guy to facilitate the facade. Some men REALLY find someones true nature behind the facade of a strong personality and tomboy to be unattractive. Some men REALLY find it somewhat offensive when a woman tells a guy how to behave towards them or how to interpret her actions rather than allow them to decide things for them self.
Some men REALLY wish monkeys could fly and build motorcycles. | |
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| do men REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys?
Posted: 5/7/2008 4:20:15 PM | I'm hoping that the OP is nothing like this, buf from experience:
I once stuck a few months with a woman who described her self of being "bolshy". It was a long distance thing, & we could only see each other at weekends. She would phone up mid week "being very upfront, honest & crass at times", for TWO hours detailing everything that she thought I had done wrong. She would talk to people as if they were dirt. She would look down on people. When I was no longer prepared to listen to her on the phone she sent legthy emails saying that everything I did was wrong. I had to text or phone her every single day. If I didn't she would have a problem. She was not happy unless she had a problem about something, & if she couldn't find a problem about something she would invent a problem about something. She was an expert in turning everything around so it was my fault. She would phone check up on me. If I was not sat at home alone then she would have a problem. If I phoned up her to ask how she was doing - then according to her - this was me checking up on her. ....
So, I am hoping that you are nothing like the above. But this is the reason why I disliked this .upfont, bloshy, crass woman. | |
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| do men REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys?
Posted: 5/7/2008 5:56:46 PM | ok let me explain a bit more. Yes I am a bit of a tomboy but like I said I clean up nice (and do it quickly). As for being crass, I suppose I used the wrong word. I just meant that at times I say exactly what I'm feeling. I am brutally honest, but not bit chy. I've never really had issues getting along with people. Its not that I have a tough as nails or negative attitude, and I don't pout if I don't get my way. I was in a six year long relationship, so I definitely know how to compromise.
I guess that I am just a bit disappointed that some men are so old fashioned and close minded that tomboys turn them off. Men are always complaining that women dont know what they want, but I do and thats apparently a turn off as well. | |
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| do men REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys?
Posted: 5/7/2008 5:57:54 PM | General rule of thumb - we attract what we project.
For example - if you behave like a wuss, then you'll be treated as such or.... if you act like a guy's pal you'll be treated like a guy's pal...
On a side note... that might be related to what you're saying (or not)... a red flag goes up for me whenever I hear w oman say she has more guy friends than girl friends - in my experience I've found that such generally means that the value she puts in herself is tied to the amoutn of attention she gets from men, which is one of the biggest motivators for infidelity...
Caveat - I'm not saying this is true of all women who have more guy friends than girl friends, but it certainly is something I've run into a bit too often... | |
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| do men REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys?
Posted: 5/7/2008 6:00:13 PM |
Yes I am a bit of a tomboy but like I said I clean up nice (and do it quickly). As for being crass, I suppose I used the wrong word. I just meant that at times I say exactly what I'm feeling. I am brutally honest, but not bit chy. I've never really had issues getting along with people. Its not that I have a tough as nails or negative attitude, and I don't pout if I don't get my way.
Well, heck, if you lived in southern California, I'd be e-mailing you for sure!
Yes, I really do prefer tomboys, and the women I've been most attracted to throughout my life have been the ones who are assertive and, yeah, tomboyish. I've dated women who are quiet and demure and have been bored out of my skull every time. | |
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| do men REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys?
Posted: 5/7/2008 6:12:02 PM | I hate to say this, and perhaps I'm not reading you correctly.
I guess that I am just a bit disappointed that some men are so old fashioned and close minded that tomboys turn them off. Men are always complaining that women dont know what they want, but I do and thats apparently a turn off as well. But this sounds very closed minded (about other people's preferences) and very negative. If you are projecting this kind of attitude (with similar statements) it might explain the guys not sticking around. | |
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| do men REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys?
Posted: 5/7/2008 6:24:38 PM |
I guess that I am just a bit disappointed that some men are so old fashioned and close minded that tomboys turn them off. Men are always complaining that women dont know what they want, but I do and thats apparently a turn off as well.
Here's the thing... some men will find it attractive, others won't. No matter who you are, how you look, and what you do not ALL MEN will be attracted to you... Why is that so difficult to accept?
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| do men REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys?
Posted: 5/8/2008 12:33:09 AM | [I guess that I am just a bit disappointed that some men are so old fashioned and close minded that tomboys turn them off. Men are always complaining that women dont know what they want, but I do and thats apparently a turn off as well.]
Are you disappointed that some men are old fashioned and closed minded and complain women don't know what they want or disappointed that the men you find attractive (and attract) are old fashioned, closed minded and complain women don't know what they want? Do you feel the need to be judged as attractive by every type of guy?
Are you the type of person that basically believes the world, government, and society would be great if it was all run by angels and robots rather than human beings? I know I do, but my robotic angel machine is busted. I took it into the shop with my broken give-a-damn, but they had to order parts. | |
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| do men REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys?
Posted: 5/8/2008 12:40:28 AM |
So what do you guys have against tomboys with strong personalities?
Nothing, unless they are rude. My ex. claimed to have a strong personality, but sometimes she was just an arrogant ***** over some very trivial issues.
In your case? I don't know much about you, but if you lived near me I'd probably contact you. | |
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| do men REALLY like girls with strong personalities and tomboys?
Posted: 5/8/2008 1:47:47 AM | Of course not all men like a certain type of person; we are different and have different tastes.
For me, a strong personality is fine. But I'm not going to deal with a spoiled brat that things its her way or no way, or a high maintenance person. Many "strong" women think its all about them and that they always have to have their 2 cents into everything. Sometimes their point of view really doesnt' matter and it's not about them at all. Many "strong" women are just arrogant and spoiled. It's kind of like someone that brags all the time about their money or looks, and then they tell people how confident they are. Usually these people are very arrogant and deep inside very insecure.
I'm a strong man, and I've always been a leader since I was a little kid. But being a leader and being strong also means I am confident enough to know when to keep my mouth shut, to be submissive at times, and to be understanding and caring. Strong people are usually good givers and they look at others before themselves because they are confident and secure. My point of view and feelings dont matter sometimes and its not all about me. | |
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