online dating service

Free Dating Site    

REGISTER | MAIL/PROFILE | HELP | NOW ONLINE | SEARCH | RATING | FORUMS | SUCCESS STORIES
Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest 100% free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > do I ask, where this is going?      Mod Threads Home login  
Page 2 of 2 1, 2
 Author Thread: do I ask, where this is going?
 ripley65

Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 26
view profile
History
do I ask, where this is going?
Posted: 5/8/2008 8:27:40 AM

I dated someone a couple of months ago (not from here, but from another site) and after 8 dates it ended (I got tired of her using me for free meals!)


How was she using you for free meals? Im guessing you were the one who kept asking her to dinner.



from the OP:
Yes, we have kissed on our departures. I see it as dates, I'll confirm that they are dates the next time I see her


Good luck with that! Id be interested to know how you approached the subject and what she says.
 jamesdeanny

Joined: 12/28/2007
Msg: 27
view profile
History
do I ask, where this is going?
Posted: 5/8/2008 1:04:55 PM
Wrong, wrong, wrong...

You have this backwards, dude. It should be HER (not you) that brings up the "where is this going?" Take it SLOW. You can NEVER move too slow. Only she knows when she's ready to move things to the next level. Hang back, enjoy the moment and if she's really into you, she'll bring it up in time. This is a good test to see how into you she really is.
 Katyguy63

Joined: 7/18/2007
Msg: 28
view profile
History
do I ask, where this is going?
Posted: 5/8/2008 7:10:33 PM
I have to agree with James Deanny on this one. Patience is the key. She's probably just doing what you ought to be doing. Being patient and letting nature take it's course.

Maybe you should examine how YOU feel and what YOU want out of the "relationship". As men, we are often results oriented and want to know exactly where we're headed and when we're gonna be there. That doesn't always work with relationships. You should proceed in the direction you WANT the relationship to go. She'll either go with you, or let you know that she doesn't want to go that direction.

Look at it as if you are both inner tubing down a river. You are together, it's peaceful, the scenery is great and your each enjoying yourselves. Where will you end? What difference does it make right now? This is the river you are on, so you should enjoy it while it lasts and savor the moments. Sure there are other Rivers you could be on with someone else, but you are on THIS one right now with her.
The future will take care of itself....Ok, that is probably a 4 on the analogy-o-meter, but hopefully I've made my point.
 shebot

Joined: 4/22/2008
Msg: 29
view profile
History
do I ask, where this is going?
Posted: 6/11/2008 12:57:55 PM
Mr. Vitamix, I think you need to spend a few minutes in the female moccasins. ...

He says that the woman he is seeing has children. That means that in order to have a date with him, she needs to make "arrangements" that may involve time, many phone calls, and money including hiring a sitter or transportation or whatever. Chances are that it is "costing her money" to make herself available for a date with him. My children are teenagers, and although they no longer need a sitter, it costs me $35-45 in pizza and Blockbuster money to make myself available to go out to dinner with a man.

Further, if a woman has children at home, she is not likely to "waste" time on a date just to get a free meal. Time for a working mother is a very scarce commodity. Spending an entire evening with a man you don't see something great in, just for a free meal, isn't a realistic trade-off. She only there because she enjoys the guy's company and wants to get to know him better.

Patience will reap better rewards....
 HulaH

Joined: 7/4/2007
Msg: 30
view profile
History
do I ask, where this is going?
Posted: 6/20/2008 6:18:17 PM


She's probably wondering the same thing but doesn't want to push; so do both of you a favour and bring up the conversation. It is always better when both parties know where they stand.


What she said.
Page 2 of 2 1, 2
 
Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > do I ask, where this is going?