| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/8/2008 7:23:19 PM | Time will reveal his true intentions..in the mean time, enjoy looking at eye candy and having attention paid to you...
and stop obsessing about being a not thin person,.sheesh you're giving us "fat chicks" a bad rep in these forums  (we are all beautiful in our own ways...some of us just have more layers of "beauty" so it makes it harder to see-so maybe he has better eyes than most!)  | |
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/8/2008 7:31:18 PM | What do you do ??
Just enjoy it.
I'm a big guy, with less than GQ looks and I don't have Trumps bank account, but every now and again a beauty surprises me. I stopped calling the optomitrist, and decided to enjoy the delusion. You only go around the planet once.
PS... My stepdad had every girl 16 to 80 drooling over him and he got upset everytime my Mom went on a hardcore diet | |
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/8/2008 7:41:42 PM |
poeticbliss wrote:
> What do you do when you meet a man who is so stunningly gorgeous and he
> is showing you tons of attention? Now I know some men like larger women,
> but this absolutely terrifies me! Especially as a larger women... I immediately
> rush to the conclusions that A) He's just looking for sex and thinks I'm an
> easy target, B) He has vision problems C) He has low self-esteem, D) He has
> a BBW fetish...
So lose weight.... because that apparently seems to be an issue
you keep coming back to over and over again. But God forbid you
should do that because then you'd be out of an excuse for why things
apparently are the way they are.
Beyond that, and this truly is a serious question: what exactly is it
going to take from some guy before you finally start to think, "This
guy like me for me"?
Apolinary | |
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/8/2008 8:03:10 PM | | seriously?..........no seriously?.............hmmm I think he may have a BBW fetish.......well in that case it seems you are in luck since you consider yourself BBW. Another thing, if he was just some dorky looking guy that you thought "should be into you" would you rule out the idea that THAT guy just wants sex? Serisouly woman, you need to stop getting in your own way by creating reasons NOT to hook up and potentially be happy with this guy and go for it. Stop getting in your own way by making excuses on why this guy "shouldn't" like you. That is for HIM to worry about. Not you. | |
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 4:24:11 AM | I have a very good friend who is breathtakingly gorgeous (think Redford, Newman). Women fall all over themselves chasing him, breathing heavily. I think he got tired of it by the time he was 13. His women tend to be "not all that" looks-wise. And believe me, if he was just out for sex, he wouldn't have to go looking: just stay home and answer the phone.
Don't ruin a (possibly) great thing by fussing about it. Do what you'd normally do -- make sure he is who he says he is, and then just enjoy it.
Good luck.
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 4:50:06 AM | | The only one who knows why he's paying attention to you is him. If it were me, I wouldn't worry about it, I'd enjoy the attention, I'd get to know him and then I'd have my answers -- which would be a lot quicker and easier than asking myself a million questions and trying to reach any conclusions without having the facts. | |
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 4:52:15 AM | I think the issue is not this guy, but yourself. I think most of us feel somewhat the same with someone drop dead gorgeous obviously pursuing us but we tend to keep these things to ourselves and have little conversations with ourselves about getting a grip.
You automatically assume that he could not have discovered he likes you? You have bigger problems than this guy and if you maintain this attitude you won't have to worry about this long. | |
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 5:03:38 AM | | Why are so many women so self conscious just let him know you are interested and if he has a pair he'll ask you out. Guys who just want sex probably wonl;t be that interested in you and probably won;t want to take you out. so talk to hima nd let him know how you feel. and that you want to get together even if you have to ask him out. its a real turn on whena woman goes up to me and asks me out. | |
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 6:26:10 AM | Dear poeticbliss, you missed an obvious possibility. He's after your money. There is an male equivalent of the female gold-digger.
ketch | |
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 6:35:45 AM | Poetic Bliss... have you met this guy in person? I don't see any details regarding this... often people confuse emails with a budding relationship.
Do not make the mistake, though, of putting people in "leagues". Who assigns such nonsense? People are people and proceed as you would in any relationship with hopeful openness and enough caution to avoid being an idiot. | |
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 8:55:51 AM | wow; women complain about the guy not being good enough looking in some posts, and then others complain the guys are too good looking. no wonder women have never been president in the U.S. yet! | |
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 9:17:18 AM | | If you met him here on POF he'll get the message since it lists the last 5 posts on your profile. Just remember beauty is in the eye of the beholder. One man's junk is another man's treasure and so forth... The BBW fetish is the funniest, 'cuz it sounds like you have a "handsome guy" fetish, LOL. | |
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 9:22:01 AM | BAH!! i had this happen once. i was talking to a hottie on here, and i thought "no way hes gonna be this hot in person".....
 hole crap, i was so tongue tied....i was blushing and started having flashbacks to my first year in high school when i saw "the love of my life"....LOL...
i was just honest. i told him his looks made me flustered and he would have to give me a minute, while disregarding any drool or words i were to wrongly pronounce. he laughed and then HE got a little shy from the "compliment". 
you don't have to be on guard - hes probly just a humble hottie, more attractive then some, but still likes to give attention. | |
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Mizzi
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Joined: 5/2/2008
Msg: 39 | |
| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 9:31:10 AM | Hang on a minute. I really like your pretty face and your great profile. If I was a guy I would be interested. You not only look lovely but you have an intelligent humerous outlook.
Bald or not bald take things lightly and be friend first and foremost and see where things go.
You are an attractive intelligent woman. Put yourself and how you feel first and everything else will fall into place. You are no fool and you will see through this guy if he is not genuine.
Omg can we see his pic, you lucky lucky girl!!! Have fun xxxx | |
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 9:52:55 AM |
There's an easy fix to this.
If you really think he shouldn't be attracted to you, give me the guy's name, phone number, a headshot, and as a favor to you, I'll head over to his place with a bottle of champagne and try to "reason" with him.
LOL
OP, it sounds like you're having some negative self-perception issues since your weight keeps coming up in your posts. Relative hotness is such a fleeting concept, don't fret over it. If you do, he'll catch on and he won't be interested any more. | |
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:58:01 AM | It seems to me that no matter how someone advises you your own insecurities will destroy any chance of a possible relationship. There doesn't seem to be a winning situation. If you are always on guard, he will never get to know you. If you are on guard at first, then let your guard down, he may see you as a completely different person and think you are playing games. If he is just looking for sex then he justifies (to you) and reinforces your insecurities and guardedness inhibiting the potential for the next guy. Or, if you do have sex, you become more guarded waiting for him to dump you since he got sex, thereby pushing him away with your guarded actions.
Of course he could be an angel in disguise rather than a human being with his own fallible thoughts, ideas, motives, and inability to read your mind.
If I meet someone that is stunningly gorgeous (assuming you mean attractive or you are attracted to) and shows me tons of attention? I enjoy the attention in and of itself. I try to observe how this attention and behavior reflects or supports who they are rather than how I interpret how they may think I may be. I also reciprocate the attention, and show I appreciate it. | |
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 12:23:51 PM | | Give the guy a break ! Beauty's in the eye of the beholder, perhaps other women think him plain, perhaps he's self-consions too, perhaps he like you for you, perhaps he's just a normal man looking for something special and fancies he's found it with you? There are no certainties in life, but if you go into a relationship full of suspicion for someones motives it isn't going to work. Innocent until proven guilty of something, credit him with the benefit of the doubt... just don't labor his "looks". Short of using his own face to knock down a wall, he can't really do anything about them. If you make it a big deal and for some reason give him the impression you feel remotely insecure because of his physical attractiveness it'd be bad. Men like confident women, comfortable in their own skins.... | |
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 12:33:23 PM | | Be yourself, since that what seems to have attracted him in the first place. Be as cautious as you would be with anyone you just met - not paranoid, just alert. Don't underestimate your appeal and see what else he's got going on besides great looks, cuz that's really not enough from either one of you. | |
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 12:40:09 PM | | Could it be that he's been with all the "gorgeous" women, and he hasn't found substance with them? I know some beautiful women who coast through life on their looks because lots of men will do anything to be with someone beautiful. But you can't find happiness that way. No matter how beautiful or rich someone is, eventually their looks or money doesn't compensate for a bad or lack of personality. While they are enjoying what their money and beauty get them, they often haven't got a clue what real happiness is. | |
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 12:45:53 PM | | To the OP, "Dont analyze this event in your life"...Enjoy it...Maybe this guy finds you beautiful.. | |
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 12:54:38 PM | The fact that you may or may not have a few pounds to lose isn't a "be all end all". I have a good friend who was Miss Plus America 2004, she's still a successful plus sized model, and she's gorgeous and sweet. She'll make a great wife for some very lucky man one of these days...
I've also learned not to put too much stock in this "out of my league" thing. I've been fortunate enough to date several gorgeous women, some I met here on POF. Before that, had I met any one of them in a bar, I would have immediately decided they were out of my league and wouldn't even have approached them. Now, I've learned not to worry too much about that... Obviously they have a reason, or reasons, to want to be out with me, and that's good enough for me...
Relax and have fun with it...
Mark
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 1:09:56 PM | Could it be that he's been with all the "gorgeous" women, and he hasn't found substance with them? I know some beautiful women who coast through life on their looks because lots of men will do anything to be with someone beautiful. But you can't find happiness that way. No matter how beautiful or rich someone is, eventually their looks or money doesn't compensate for a bad or lack of personality. While they are enjoying what their money and beauty get them, they often haven't got a clue what real happiness is.
I couldn't agree more laffintalk. People who coast through life on their looks don't have to question "what went wrong with my last relationship?" Why do that when it's just SO much easier to just snap their fingers and "presto", they have another one?
Often there is a REASON those gorgeous women are single, and sometimes it's because they are total divas, or narcissists, or man haters, or crazy, or gold diggers, or players, or whatever else. Like it says in my profile, I'd trade 10 beautiful divas for one pretty sweetheart any day of the week...
Mark
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 1:14:23 PM | OP: It's your rampant insecurity that's going to run this guy off, not your overweight frame. You have two choices: 1) Accept the guy's interest at face value until/unless he gives you a reason to doubt his motives, or 2) Lose whatever weight you think you might need to lose so that you don't have to worry about the guy's motives. Simple enough?
File this self-pity/paranoia thread under "gift-horse" or "mouth"! | |
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| Help-- he's TOO attractive!
Posted: 5/9/2008 1:17:56 PM | maybe he goes for personality?
Maybe he does really have low self esteem. Ya know how sometimes you see these really ugly men with beautiful women... or hot men with not-so-attractive women.... when i was in school, one of my professors said that you look for someone that compliments you... Meaning your drop dead gorgous so you find someone that isnt so hot. OR your an ugly guy and you think your hot so you find a hot girl. the whole thing is rather confusing. Like i dont like to talk much, im more of a listener, so i want someone who will do most of the talking for me!
But i say GO FOR HIM!!!!! If hes so gorgeous, he could get laid by some other hottie... who cares, bottom line is HE wants YOU!!! | |
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