| what would you do, seriously...
Posted: 5/11/2008 11:30:18 AM | It sounds to me like you gave the guy way too many chances. And it all started with the second one. Personally you seem like a really attractive girl that can do MUCH better. Consider yourself to be lucky. Most people find out they're with the wrong person after they have a kid or two. You can make a clean break and put this jerk behind you.
Good luck! | |
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| what would you do, seriously...
Posted: 5/11/2008 11:45:22 AM | no matter how wonderful their words of being 'sorry' may be, and making amends blah blah blah...actions do indeed speak a helluva lot louder than those shallow words which are just lies. its tuff to try to think with ones brain when heartstrings are attached...and its painful too to let go of all those hopes and dreams you had for each other. but if you dont...your sanity will suffer for sure. like many other posters have already said...it is a trust issue not to mention respect too. he has no respect for you. he has no respect for himself, except a false one. people of this ilk are simply...a loser...
good luck hon... | |
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| what would you do, seriously...
Posted: 5/12/2008 3:10:05 AM | | Seriously you deserver better than that. Leave him and be done with it. Cutting ties can be hard but better to rip the bandage off quick now than slowly over time. Myself personally I have a zero tolerance policy on cheating. If someone cheats on me there are no second chances, period. Besides a sense of self worth much of that comes from the fact that I would never cheat. I mean really, I don't understand what's so ****ing hard about staying faithful to someone. | |
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| what would you do, seriously...
Posted: 5/12/2008 3:34:11 AM | How much is too much?.......i would have been gone the moment i saw him texting/emailing others.....
your relationship now will be void of trust. Is this really OK with you?..why are you still there?
you know, its more painful being with someone in this situation, than being alone you know.
and if you let him get away with it...............and getting away with it means you stay with him.............he will just continue like this for the rest of your time together. sooner or later, you will break down.
the sooner you get out he better my dear
many regards | |
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| what would you do, seriously...
Posted: 5/12/2008 3:40:15 AM | Hi there OP,
Right here it is pure and simple... You are 23 and have your whole life in front of you. Second off, you are a stunning girl and by the sounds of things have let someone do the whole abuse thing on you and he knows exactly how much he has damaged your self esteem.
Some folk not only operate on double standards, have their proverbial cake and eat it, but also commit the most unforgiveable crime of all robbing the self esteem of others to boost their own.
Answer is this, hard though it is, MOVE ON and find yourself a decent caring guy, who will enable you to grow, give you love, make you feel secure. However, first of all before, even meeting another guy, you need to work on yourself. Build up your self esteem, find out who you are and what makes you feel happy as a person.
Once you have worked on yourself, you will attract the right guy and not someone who robs you of your own identity.
Good Luck - you can do it girl......
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| what would you do, seriously...
Posted: 5/12/2008 3:42:31 AM | mixkitty, you'll know what choice is best for you when you start believeing in yourself again and when you start to value your own life and your own happiness. I'm not telling you to leave him because I believe in doing all I can to fix a relationship and not run out during hard times. However, don't underestimate the happiness and satisfaction you can achieve by depending on yourself and taking control of your own life. Only you know how much you can handle in your current situation. Dating sucks no matter what age you are but becareful of what you're using as an reason to stay and an excuse not to go. I don't know how many years you've been together but were they all for nothing? If the two of you can't fix what's going on then personally I think the true waste would be staying in a marriage only for the sake of the scary unknown. Best of luck and get strong girl!  | |
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| what would you do, seriously...
Posted: 5/12/2008 4:15:15 AM | | when the trust is gone so should you be. don't end up like me staying with a man that lied to me all the time and getting more depressed and lacking in confidence everyday until the only comfort you find is in food and drink and you end up fat and once there all men treat you like you are rubbish. i left mine taking my 2 young children 14 years ago after ten years of marriage. i didn't even dare to try to date anyone again till last year. | |
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| what would you do, seriously...
Posted: 5/12/2008 4:33:27 AM | | I would run, run, run. I agree with the person who said he sounds like a sex addict. And if he is e-mailing men for sex, he is either bi or gay. Do you want to be married to a bi or gay man? For some people that works. But what DOES NOT work is his lying and cheating. Unless you are into swinging, I would say get out now! Good luck! | |
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| what would you do, seriously...
Posted: 5/12/2008 5:07:11 AM | One day, you WILL be divorced.
Don't you think you would rather do it at 23 than 33? Or 43? Or 53?
How many years of unhappiness are you willing to sign up for?
He never should have gotten married.
If you stay, you would be hurting yourself. You already know that.
You are only five years older than my daughter. I would tell her the same thing! I would hate to see her (or anyone) have such a life! | |
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| what would you do, seriously...
Posted: 5/17/2008 7:57:13 AM | | Hey why you block me. I cant figure out what your email meant . I never emailed you before I heard from you. I have written you many responses and still am confussed as to want you meant or for wht reson I was blocked. I am a gentalman and I wa hurt by this. I wish I knew wht I may have done to offend you . If I have then I am soory..Just wish I knew what I was sorry for.lol. Allan | |
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| what would you do, seriously...
Posted: 5/17/2008 8:38:07 AM | I'm sorry you are going through all this... You know? What your husband is doing is really too much... I know a divorce is very difficult and is a decision that takes courage and deep thinking, I have been there; but maybe you should consider it...
Good luck honey  | |
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| what would you do, seriously...
Posted: 5/17/2008 8:48:11 AM | | You need to kick him to the curb... He sounds like a sick puppy. And once a cheat, always a cheat.. | |
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| what would you do, seriously...
Posted: 5/17/2008 8:51:43 AM | All the "time and money you have invested" aren't going to matter if he gives you HIV now are they?
Is time and money more important to you than being with someone who is trustworthy and shows you respect? You decide. | |
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| what would you do, seriously...
Posted: 5/17/2008 9:26:12 AM | Hi MK,
As a healthcare worker I am putting this to you. The present research/statistic shows that HIV is rising in the Heterosexual population, This is mainly due to spouses and lovers going elsewhere and contract HIV and take it home. Please LOVE YOURSELF and get out as fast as you can from this situation. Don't walk, RUN.. run for your life luv.....Money and time is just that. Cut your losses.. you are young... Maybe you should take a look in one of those HIV /AIDS ward and you will understand. That man has shown nothing but disrespect for you.. Well it is about time to respect and love yourself ..
Good luck | |
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| what would you do, seriously...
Posted: 5/17/2008 2:54:34 PM | | The question you have to ask yourself is, is he worth throwing more money and time at. He has already shown you he isn't going to change. If it were me I'd cut my losses and run while there is still time. But that's a decission you have to make for yourself. Good luck in whatever you choose. | |
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| what would you do, seriously...
Posted: 5/17/2008 5:47:32 PM | | Emailing women AND men for sex? I'd be packing my bags for good. Nothing positive can come from that situation. Cut your losses. | |
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| what would you do, seriously...
Posted: 6/1/2008 7:26:48 PM | hi,
there's no sense in reasoning this strange behavior of his....he's into some nasty lifestyle and it's esculating...2 options, u either leave him & start anew or stay with him & put up with all this & continue to get hurt over and over and over again...
sorry to hear about this...hope you walk thru the doors of realization to start a new life and say goodbye to the old... | |
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