| Only getting twenty emails a day. I must be doing something wrong.
Posted: 5/11/2008 9:49:47 PM | Hank, I rarely read anyone's profile if it's longer than two paragraphs, but I read yours in a matter of a few minutes and I enjoyed it a lot. I completely disagree with anyone who recommends cutting stuff out in the spirit of brevity.
I think the length and idiosyncrasy works as a good filter for you; it really discourages people from writing you boring or impersonal messages.
Do you have any pictures of you with the cat, or even just the cat by itself? I'll bet if you put one up and captioned it with something pertaining to the story, it just might encourage one or two more people to (at least) search your profile for the relevant section. In so doing, those same people might enjoy the cat story so much that they'd read the rest. I don't guarantee that this would work, but considering the time you spent writing your profile, I think even more people should be taking the time to read it. This course of action would, of course, reduce you to being one of those creepy people with kitty-cat pictures in their profiles, so maybe it's best that you skip it. Cat pictures seem to read as "committed to a life of loneliness punctuated only by the sounds of my twelve feline companions."
I have to ask, have you read the book/seen the film Wonderboys? You share your bathrobe writing habit with its main character.
One last question: The word "osculate," as far as I know, means "to kiss." "Oscillate" means "to swing with steady rhythm." I thought "oscillate" was the word you were looking for, but I could be wrong. | |
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| Only getting twenty emails a day. I must be doing something wrong.
Posted: 5/11/2008 9:54:22 PM |
Do you have any pictures of you with the cat, or even just the cat by itself? I'll bet if you put one up and captioned it with something pertaining to the story, it just might encourage one or two more people to (at least) search your profile for the relevant section.
That is an excellent idea. Wish I'd thought of it.
I'd remove my advice to delete that horrible story if you had a pic of the now-happy kitty with you. | |
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| Only getting twenty emails a day. I must be doing something wrong.
Posted: 5/12/2008 4:51:40 PM | Deuce: Thanks for the review. Glad you liked it. I do want to rework the train story - a little trimming, I think. Don't want to change of ending, though. It's an example of my strange luck. The story is not about what it seems to be about. It's not about the train wreak. I want the reader to see how lucky I was not because I didn't get killed; but because I hadn't spilled my coffee. I really wanted that coffee.
Added photos: I took this bare-chest shot where I extended my gut. Looks like I have a huge beer gut. Didn't fit my personality, so I decided against posting it. It's a funny photo, though.
Gottabegreat: just go to the top of the profile review page, click "start new thread," type out a request for a review. And I'll go have a look.
Thanks Molesworth for catching the error. I fixed it as soon as I read your post. Thanks for the review. I make some comments about a kitty photo, next...
UrsulaMajor: for you, I might add the kitty photo. I'm not keen on the idea; but I might put one up while I have the cat story on the profile (I really want to replace it with the Sloe Gin story - probably will, in time. Not sure if you remember that one). I'm allergic to cats so I gave the kitty to a friend (and the lady I took it from never call to ask about her cat). When I have a day off, I'll have to drive out with my camera. Maybe. | |
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| Only getting twenty emails a day. I must be doing something wrong.
Posted: 5/12/2008 5:55:57 PM | I'm lazy and this topic, plus your profile, is way too long. Think of it like a starting resume, put the best of the best things into it, and keep it down to a page. Only in this case, keep it down to 1/2 a page.
People want instant gratification, and why spend an hour reading your profile when there are probably 3 thousand others in their match set alone? Just the sheer sight of that profile is going to turn people away. It's too intimidating IMO. | |
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| Only getting twenty emails a day. I must be doing something wrong.
Posted: 5/12/2008 6:14:43 PM | Thanks for the review Nate.
People want instant gratification
I wouldn't be interested in those types.
Just the sheer sight of that profile is going to turn people away. It's too intimidating
Nor would I be interested in anyone who would be intimidated when confronted with a couple of pages of words.
Thanks again for taking the time to read it. You did read it? | |
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| Only getting twenty emails a day. I must be doing something wrong.
Posted: 5/12/2008 10:08:12 PM | Love the profile - makes me want to change my own boring shortie right away!
Love the stories, you are a great story teller.
You asked for comments on spelling, so here goes: I would not put 'racing passed' in the train story, I would put 'racing past'.
Now I'm hanging my head in shame as I've just shown myself up for a natural-born nit-picker.
I also like your suggestion about seeing what someone is like by looking at their forum posts.
So thank you, thank you and thank you again. | |
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| Only getting twenty emails a day. I must be doing something wrong.
Posted: 5/13/2008 11:16:52 AM | You Lucky Bugger!
I think I have received about twenty since I joined this site - over a year ago.
I can't even get them to write me back after I take the time to write them.
That's okay because I'm not lonely, only alone, for the time being.
If I got 20 a day, it would probably confuse me ;-)
Maybe I shouldn't be so honest in my approach on this site, maybe I need to play games on this site, maybe but NOT - it isn't me - what you see is what you get.
If I only get one more email - it might be the ONE.
I'll take quality over quantity any day! | |
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| Only getting twenty emails a day. I must be doing something wrong.
Posted: 5/13/2008 1:10:04 PM | Shervo, I was joking about the 20 e-mails. In my opening post I confess and admit it is really just one - but it's really two. Of that, 25% are first timers, the other 75% are from people who've written to me before or are writing about a forum post I've made (or someone I know from the forums). I will say I've received a response from every first contact e-mail I've ever sent - um, well, I've never actually sent one (except to forum posters), so I can truthfully claim I've never got the dreaded read/delete.
Noharminaskin: Thanks, glad you like it. Past or Passed? Now I'm not sure. I checked "The Elements of Style" but could find it. I looked on the web and found this:
If you are referring to a period of time before now or a distance, use “past”: “the team performed well in the past,” “the police car drove past the suspect’s house.” If you are referring to the action of passing, however, you need to use “passed“: “when John passed the gravy, he spilled it on his lap,” “the teacher was astonished that none of the students had passed the test.” Remember that no matter however you have ”passed the time” you have never “past the time,” not even in the distant past. http://www.wsu.edu/~brians/errors/passed.html
I can't decided if I've used it correctly, but I'm thinking you are correct and it should be "past." Then again, the train was passing past me.
Thanks, Nursinggrl. Oh, Deuce, it's not in jest. | |
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| Only getting twenty emails a day. I must be doing something wrong.
Posted: 5/13/2008 1:42:58 PM | I'm apparently a worse nit-picker than Noharminaskin:
"Past" is confusing because it's an adjective, noun, preposition, and adverb. In the expression "racing past," it's an adverb because you mean "racing onwards." "Racing passed" implies that "racing" is the noun, rather than the verb.
\/\/\/\/Well, that simplifies the issue!\/\/\/\/ | |
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| Only getting twenty emails a day. I must be doing something wrong.
Posted: 5/13/2008 2:46:58 PM | | I liked the profile... a lot! I really feel like I know you, like you're the gruff uncle that scares off kids for fun (while secretly adoring them). I don’t know, I could be wrong, but I have two uncles like that and I've charmed my way into their wills nonetheless. Wow to your stories, people with stories are the best kind to know. The things that people do in front of practical strangers!!! That cat-lady must have been a real piece of work to wig out in front of you! So what did you name the cat? | |
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| Only getting twenty emails a day. I must be doing something wrong.
Posted: 5/13/2008 3:33:46 PM | | Thanks nerdsauce. The cat's name is now Marshmallow. I don't know what the cat's name was before. As far as being the gruff uncle, well, I'm the favorite of the nieces and nephews who are aways in trouble, but I think I scare the rest of them. | |
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| Only getting twenty emails a day. I must be doing something wrong.
Posted: 5/13/2008 5:27:24 PM | | I would shorten the text, turn more into the camera and lose the glasses, but that's me. I kind of have a sense for what women want to see from us guys, and that is mostly your face. Maybe older women really are attracted by clever wording and long biographies, but I assume they too would like to see what you look like a little better. | |
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| Only getting twenty emails a day. I must be doing something wrong.
Posted: 5/13/2008 5:39:56 PM | aw Hank...I love it! (from one long-profiler to another and yeah mine is long for a reason...that is how I am...I communicate and love to do so when inspired with the right muse).
I *got* the part about not losing the coffee.
If I was your neighbor-lady or something...I'd probably do ya for life. LOL
I am looking for love-with-sex and it seems to me you are looking for like-with-sex.
Ce La Vie (but I am anti-french) lol and we aren't here to talk about the differences...but about your profile...I digress. LOL
Mole: I am so impressed by your command of grammar and such. I hang my head in shame. You've remembered your education...it's nice to see that intelligence.
~Lizzie | |
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| Only getting twenty emails a day. I must be doing something wrong.
Posted: 5/13/2008 9:31:34 PM | You know I loved all your profiles including this one. You're the only guy I know who can make a whole story to make a point. Instead of just telling us your lucky, you have painted us a picture of the train wreck to prove it. Great job as per usual.
Instead of telling us you have a big heart you show us with the cat story.
You're almost apologetic about not being a great romancer, but trust me you should not try and give off that vibe. I would find a good carpenter infinitely more endearing
than a guy who brings me flowers. Retile my floor and my heart is yours! That's gold!
Maybe it would help to leave off that part about not emailing ladies first. Just let them
email you anyway...no need to tell them you might be too shy to make the first move.
I have a problem with using TWO stories in ONE profile just to make a point of using all the avaliable characters allowed. I would suggest expanding on one or the other, and leave one for your future revision. HeHe. Just jesting with ya. You know I Love Ya, and still have a serious secret crush on ya!
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| Only getting twenty emails a day. I must be doing something wrong.
Posted: 5/14/2008 3:18:29 PM | Thanks, Serendipitous, for having a look. I'm blushing, now. Maybe I'll send out some letters. I probably should. I did have a profile that was just one long story. I didn't get many responses - of course it could of been the story I picked.
Hi elizabethnotliz, I read your long profile. You've got some good stuff in there - I mean, really good.
Kreuztraeger: there is a photo of what I normally look like, looking directly at the camera, right in the profile.
Thanks again, everyone. | |
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| Only getting twenty emails a day. I must be doing something wrong.
Posted: 5/14/2008 4:59:01 PM | You're very welcome, always glad to help a gifted writer!
I did have a profile that was just one long story.
I remember it well, and it's still your best one in my opinion. The Casino story
is my all time favorite profile, and it's what captured my attention.
I'm glad you'll be sending out messages! It would help to include a real descriptive
paragraph about the type of lady you would enjoy dating. It's important to give
the reader an idea if she matches up to your expectations or not.
Also perhaps you could set your age ranges? It let's your audience know if they are
within the demographic you seek. In other words narrow all that down for your
readers to satisfy their *need to know. *
Hope this is something you can work with. Always a pleasure out! | |
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| Only getting twenty emails a day. I must be doing something wrong.
Posted: 5/15/2008 1:39:03 PM |
Get rid of those glasses.
What's wrong with the glasses? I spent a couple of hours looking for just the right glasses for that photo. I think they make me look quite studly, actually.
I once put that photo up for rating. Everyone rated me a ten. I was at the top of the Hot 500 list. I finally had to take myself out of the rating game - all these 20 year old women were writing to me looking for sex. I couldn't keep up with all the e-mails. Honest. | |
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| Only getting twenty emails a day. I must be doing something wrong.
Posted: 5/15/2008 1:55:08 PM | | Wasn't the topic, about must be doing something wrong? Now in this statement your claiming Rated a 10 and can't keep up with the e-mails.....Should the topic have been about someone to rate your Story.....I think maybe your attempting to write a book and getting the opions of others to see if they enjoy reading your story......Which would it be. | |
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| Only getting twenty emails a day. I must be doing something wrong.
Posted: 5/15/2008 2:22:19 PM | Okay, I lied about the photo rating. Not everyone rated me a 10. I think I also got a couple of Nines.
The idea of a profile review is to have people tell you what they think of your profile. I thought it was good - doesn't mean others would see it that way. So I wanted to know what others thought. If the majority of the reviews didn't like it, I'd have to reconsider the profile. | |
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