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| Is there such a thing as a confirmed bachelor???
Posted: 5/20/2008 8:09:54 PM | I am 47 and I doubt I would ever get married , just never got on my "to do list " in life. Seen way to many falling apart all around me , I have known several with over 20 years that faded away. Times have changed , not like my parents day when people stuck together through thick and thin and MADE it work.
I have had several longterm common-law relationships , 6 yrs( had 2 kids) , 3 yrs and last one was 8 years ,so no commitment phobia here ,just seen to many people give thier hard earned money to divorce lawyers ,who dont give a damn anyways...
I have been single now 3 years by my choice , dont NEED a woman for anything, I cook ,I clean , do my own laundry and hang it on the line..no probs. I dont even have the urge to date right now , just enjoying life the way it is and not desperate to change anything...  | |
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| Is there such a thing as a confirmed bachelor???
Posted: 5/20/2008 8:17:58 PM | Commitment phob, Peter Pan Syndrome, Momma's boy....who knows.
The female equivalent of this is;
career harpie
humourless fem nazi
bubbleheaded blonde
overprotected princess?
Sticks and stones can break my bones but words will never hurt me. | |
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| Is there such a thing as a confirmed bachelor???
Posted: 5/20/2008 9:05:01 PM | are there men who want to spend the rest of their lives dating? Or are they just not finding the right woman to settle down with?
I don't plan to spend the rest of my life dating, but I'm not going to jump into a marriage the way that most folks seem to. If I get married, it will be once. The financial cost of a divorce for a male with a good job is absolutely frightening to me.
Let me put it this way- if I enter into a contract to purchase a car and it doesn't work out, I'm out of luck for a few years. If I enter in to the wrong contract with a woman, I may be out of luck for decades.
So I'm hopeful that I'll find someone I want to make that move with; but I won't force it just to avoid being single. | |
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| Is there such a thing as a confirmed bachelor???
Posted: 5/20/2008 10:44:44 PM | I think alot of men have issue with the whole idea of a woman's wedding ring being the equivalent of hitting the legal lottery.
Most of the single guys I know are in no rush to get married.
Many of the ones who've been divorced, plan on never getting remarried.
Many of the ones who've never been married, have seen enough divorces to seriously question the value of getting married.
You women aren't around when we're sitting at the local bars or games talking about this stuff, but the truth is, more and more of us have decided that the upside/downside risk is too out of whack.
The fact is, if you're in a LTR with a woman (or even several Short term relationships), what exactly does a guy have to gain if he gets married? Then measure what he has to lose if he gets divorced?
Toss in that the more successful you are, the greater the penalty for an unsuccessful marriage, and suddenly the smarter, more successful men (who happen to be pretty good at risk assessment... it's part of what made them successful), start drifting from the position of Certainly, to Probably, to Maybe, to Not likely, to No way in Hell.
I'm not quite that jaded personally, but then I would need a pretty spectacular woman for me to seriously consider tying the knot... and even then, she'd better be ready to spend some time with some lawyers.
Now if they removed the disproportionately punitive system from Marriage and Divorce, then you would probably see a lot more men going back the other way... unfortunately, that's just not that likely.
In the meanwhile, increasing numbers of men will just bide their time and either say, "I'm picky", or "I'm waiting for the right one", or simply "I like being a Bachelor".
Wanderer | |
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| Is there such a thing as a confirmed bachelor???
Posted: 5/21/2008 1:33:22 AM | Married ? Today ? You must be kidding OP.
Every guy who gets married and then divorced gets taken to the cleaners. No man walks away with half of what he put in. God help him if there are children blessing the union that didn't last too.
It's enough that we're on the hook for all kinds of things by simply living with a woman for two years or more , no matter what the situation is like afterwards. Marriage ? Only if I plan on dying before the divorce papers are signed.
That's not just cynicism talking either. I personally don't mind the idea of getting married at all. Then reason kicks in and I remember that in no way do I stand a chance of getting anything considering the misandric laws the courts enforce. Men simply get cheated in the event of a divorce and since women initiate the divorce %70 of the time, it would be silly to voluntarily enter into such a risky proposition. There are no real benefits and only everything to lose.
No way. | |
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