| Seperated is NOT single......or is it?
Posted: 5/17/2009 6:18:12 PM | | I agree with all you other smart people but now more inportant stuff. Anyone interested in Yank tix which come with the Audi club. These are field level close to the field. The Yanks gave me some extra instead of giving me back money and I will sell them cheap. Thanks Lance Wallach I have a few games left in sets of two. | |
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| Seperated is NOT single......or is it?
Posted: 7/12/2009 9:56:19 AM | | In my book, if you are separated there is no guarantee that you will ever actually divorce. I've run into this situation before where someone I was dating never intended to get divorced and was still basically supporting his wife. Unfortunately I didn't realize that until too late. I'm more cautious now. | |
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| Seperated is NOT single......or is it?
Posted: 7/27/2009 7:22:02 PM | This is something that really angers me.
Separated=Married. There is NO difference. Until you are divorced, you are married.
And divorced is not exactly single, but that topic is for another thread.... | |
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| Seperated is NOT single......or is it?
Posted: 8/10/2009 8:15:00 AM | I am not a New Yorker, but hope to travel to NY again someday... I feel that if a person is seperated they are not single; they are still in most cases legally married, even if they are not living with the other person;, so they can't legally say they are single;
I don't like it when I get these ignornant men messaging me saying they are single, when they are actually just divorced and therefore can not pretend that they have lived a life of a single person- when in fact they were married and are seperated or divorced.. That really makes me angry..!
I have never been married and have no interest in marriage...! Dating or friends is fine, but that's all I want..! | |
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| Seperated is NOT single......or is it?
Posted: 8/12/2009 10:03:40 AM | The problem is that this question is not an easy one to answer. You can answer technically - yes - someone who is separated is still married.
But what about someone who is living apart but is not divorced because of extenuating circumstances? For example - I was separated for 3 years while my divorce settlement was negotiated - during that period of time - should I not be allowed to date and have relationships because I was "still married"? Of course that is not the case. When I signed my divorce financial settlement - it then took another 6 months for the divorce to become final - and when it did I did not even find out for another 3 months until I happened to call my attorney and ask if it ever went through - that is how much of an afterthought my divorce was!!
The problem is not in what separation means - but what it connotes. Someone will always assume for the purposes of a profile here that "separated" means that the person is not available for a relationship because they could always go back to their former spouse. In many cases that is ridiculous. Also - I know couples that have divorced but financially they have been unable to separate their living arrangements and still live in two portions of the same house - what is THAT called??
The question should be - are you in a relationship or not in a relationship - and separated is NOT being in a relationship.
Lou
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| Seperated is NOT single......or is it?
Posted: 8/16/2009 7:00:34 PM | if you click the check box for limiting who can email you and you check the:
Married(Blocks prefer not to say, married or living together)
area, it does not exclude Separated. I as a separated individual would LOVE to see another box that allows women to avoid me. I'm serious. If a woman does not want to talk to a guy who is honest about a legal relationship, then so be it. I have seen many women who mark themselves as "divorced" but state in the about me section that there divorce is almost final. Mine is as well, and once it is, I will change my setting to Divorced. I'm sure the reverse is true as well that women find guys making the same claims, but I don't read the guys profiles so...
All that said, individuals can decide if they consider another person available or not. Emotional availability is not based on a legal definition. And separated is just that, a legal definition. It the happens to be after marriage but before divorce is finalized. If papers are not filed, you are married, if they are you are legally separated. | |
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| Seperated is NOT single......or is it?
Posted: 9/5/2009 1:59:03 PM | | I think it's single. If the barrier between you and being divorced is not of your own wishes, there's no difference. Some marriages are meaningless and some "single" people's hearts may forever belong to some person who dumped them that they were never married to. | |
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| Seperated is NOT single......or is it?
Posted: 9/12/2009 6:49:41 AM |
"separated and single"! Isn't that an oxymoron?
That's an oxymoron in my book!!! I really don't care to get into the middle of a someone else's divorce proceedings while dating them.
And divorced is not exactly single, but that topic is for another thread...
You are so right there. Some are are divorced, only by paper however in their heart they are still "attached"
Also single to me means you have never been married, divorced means you were married once, but no longer. When I see a man in his say his mid 40's or more and is listed as "single" and looking for long-term it makes me wonder if they know HOW to commit in a relationship. | |
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| Seperated is NOT single......or is it?
Posted: 9/17/2009 5:41:26 PM | | I am legally separated. NY will not grant me a divorce for a year. I put separated in my profile because I do not want to lie. Yes it may keep some people from messaging me but I am married on paper ONLY. | |
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