| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/24/2008 4:01:25 PM | | I have to agree with yu zopz. I dont know how many times I've chatted with someone for quite sometime on the intent of meeting someday...and it just never happened. Those people just want to chat and enjoy having a string of people to chat to. This is a DATING SITE...that's what its all about. It's just a medium to meet and screen people your interested in. It hard to really get the just of a person typing in a little box. I contact someone, chat a few lines then ask if they'd like to talk live. You can tell a lot by a persons voice...like when they start to studder when you ask if their married..LOL. | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/24/2008 4:41:38 PM | I don't like talking on the phone or giving out my number, but I don't mind meeting quickly. I think it's easier to tell if you are interested in someone in person than over the phone or internet.
If there's no attraction, you haven't wasted any time falling in love with emessages.
Nutt | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/24/2008 6:01:08 PM | **Bet you any $$$ majority of the guys (can't say ALL) who wanna meet up so soon, wanna see what the chick looks like....
Is she hot?
Does she even LOOK like her photo?, etc
We all know guys aren't chatty, and they won't wanna 'waste' their time getting to know someone that well, by chatting, if they could potentially find out the chick isn't as she appeared, or seemed to be.. .. ..don't get me wrong.....guys could see a 'smokin' chick's photo, and wanna meet up BECAUSE she's hot. . . .. I have guy friends.....I've met people in person, from online, and when the guy pretty much says "I wanna meet up because after it's all said and done, you still dont "know" the person.....put 2 and 2 together ;)
Hope that helps! | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/24/2008 6:14:39 PM | Wow! You're immaturity and lack of life experience is screaming..... I agree sometimes it is too quick....but other times it seems to make sense after one or two conversations on the phone to meet in person....after all the chemistry both physically and emotionally will be evident almost immediately, so why waste time????
Just have the good sense to meet in a very public place and let someone know where you will be.......Keep your EYES open.... | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/24/2008 6:20:26 PM | | I have had the same requests, some make it pretty clear what their intentions are, and I tell them that I am not interested. Others, I just tell them that I am not comfortable meeting them that quickly, and they either understand or they dont. A lot also depends on the kind of conversations we have had, I would never meet anyone the first night we started to talk, but would consider meeting after a bit if our conversations compelled me to think that there could be something worth persuing with him. | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/24/2008 7:15:29 PM | | I so agree....messaging is not a true respresentation of a persons' personality....and then there is the chemistry factor....it's ok to speak once or twice on the phone...then meet casually.... | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/25/2008 8:45:27 AM | All the time. Don't let anyone fool you. Generally it's a sign of their desperation, and most guys who send those kinds of messages send them out in spam-form to a dozen girls.
And for people who say "blah blah some people really want to meet"... well duh, but whatever happened to getting to know someone a little? is that a bad thing? The internet can be a big bad scary place for women, there's absolutely no reason a woman shouldn't do a little background and get to know someone before they get together, even if it's an intimate encounter. Do you walk up to random guys in the bar and say "let's go screw right now" with no conversation? (Some do, but MOST DO NOT). Again, it's a matter of knowing what you want and respecting yourself enough to do the due dilligence to find EXACTLY that. | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/25/2008 8:47:45 AM | | I like to make it quick to meet ..I've wasted so much time talking online or on the phone .and when you go meet them there's nothing there .very few and far between you might make a friend .I kinda only want to know the basics .that way we have more to talk about when we do meet .and body language you can read .... | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/25/2008 2:36:34 PM | When I was on here, I was asking for a date by the second or third email. I don't do the whole email for weeks on end gig. I mean if you are that cautious, insecure, stand-offish, then we probably wouldn't click anyways. I mean you're driving your own car to a public place, what am I going to do, pull out an oozy in the middle of town and start mowing down people?
That and it gets boring typing my life story over and over again. Hell, the girl I am with now emailed me one time and asked for a date the next night. Been with her ever since. She doesn't play around and neither do I. | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/25/2008 3:11:37 PM | My belief is that the best way to get to know somebody is to meet them face to face in a public place that isn't too noisy.
To much gets lost when communicating with email. You can't see a person's body language and how they 'hold' themselves.
So having said that, when I first came on this site, sometimes I would ask some questions and ask to continue the conversation over coffee or doing something interesting either on the 1st or 2nd message.
But now, I've modified my approach and the earliest I'll ask is the 2nd message. It's more interesting to get a bit of a dialog going at first.
And I'll start off by asking or making a statement about something that jumps out at me in the woman's profile.
This has lead to some funny/memorable email conversations... like one I had discussing the merits of Nutella vs Nifty.
Most women seem to prefer to email back and forth first. But there are a minority that have my point of view that the best kind of interaction is face to face interaction. | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/26/2008 6:44:09 AM | It all depends on the person and how they view dating. I've noticed that a lot of people on this site (men as well as women) only look at the pictures and skip reading the profile. Because of that, I like to chat through a few emails first before giving out my number. When I feel comfortable and think that there might be a connection I consider giving out my number. Then I like to talk a few times on the phone before meeting in person. To me, tone of voice says a lot.
Not only that, there are a lot of psycho people in the dating pool so I'm kind of hesitant to give out my number in the beginning or to even meet in person until I feel I know a little more about the person. I know you can't know everything about a person through chat but I do believe in most cases you can tell a lot about a person after a few messages. For example a guy contacted me (from another site) and asked for my yahoo ID so we could chat. Nothing in his profile made me leary so I gave out my ID. We chatted briefly later that day (two whole sentences, I was fixing supper so didn't have time to chat at that point). When I got online the next day he messages me demanding to know why I didn't get back online, why I was playing games with him, etc. Yeah, that after saying 2 sentences to the guy the day before. He reeked of control freak to me.
Personally, there are just some things I that turn me off in a person. Because of some people not reading profiles, I want to make sure a person doesn't have those "qualities". More specifically... if a man doesn't like children it won't work out with us, if a man is wants more children it won't work out with us, if he is a smoker it won't work out with us (not knocking smokers but I personally can't handle being around smokers for various reasons), and I personally refuse to even meet someone who is only seperated and not completely divorced. I like to know things such as this up front because I don't see the point in wasting time or money on a date if there is no chance of the relationship going any further. | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/26/2008 6:50:51 AM | | AND SO WHAT YOU GOING TO HIDE BEHIND A COMPUTER YOUR WHOLE LIFE FOR MEN IF THERE IS NO PHYSICAL ATTRACTION WE DO NOT PERSUE AS IN WOMEN TO ME IF YOU DO NOT MEET I DO NOT WISH TO PLAY THE EMAIL GAME OR IM I WANT TO HERE YOUR VOICE LOOK INTO YOUR EYES SEE IF THERE IS CHEMISTRY BEFORE IT GOES ON AND ON SAVE TIME FOR EVERYONE MEET AS SOON AS POSSIBLE DOESENT MEAN SEX RELAX IF YOU WERE IN A BAR YOUWOULD GIVE A NUMBER EVEN IF IT WAS A FAKE ONE SO WHAT GET OVER IT | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/26/2008 6:53:10 AM | | this is a dating site.....not a pen pal site....whats the point of endless emails back and forth...if you really want to see if there is a connection between two people...meet them face to face...and try not to assume that if we want to meet you,,,,that it always means we want to jump your bones....just want to see if we're waisting our time or not | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/26/2008 10:23:36 AM | latefall said """That and it gets boring typing my life story over and over again. Hell, the girl I am with now emailed me one time and asked for a date the next night. Been with her ever since. She doesn't play around and neither do I."""
Yet, your profile says you are looking for women. See, that's the kind of thing I like to weed out before I waste my time on an actual meet. | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/26/2008 10:30:41 AM | If you are free right now what is the issue? As long as you make sure you ask a few questions and know who you are meeting. I personally like a few emails and calls to get a good feeling. This can be done quickly or a few days. I am not into playing games or getting into a dangerous situtaion. This is all one huge hisk.
Take a cell, tell someone where and who you are meeting. Tell them when you are to return. Always, always, listen to that inner voice. Get there early and get his car tag. Write it down. Just be safe. Or have a friend close by. Many ways to get this started.
Some are just free at the moment and want to meet that new friend. After all we are on here to meet people. Right? | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/26/2008 10:44:24 AM | There is nothing wrong with meeting even on the same day if you both are free.
Wouldn't you rather have a drink and TALK to the guy than get carpal tunnel while trying to decipher if he really is the way you're picturing him??
Come out for happy hour, invite your virtual stranger and SEE WHAT YOU'VE GOT!!
IMO - men declining a meeting with woman in a public place citing "safety reasons" are funniest of them all.
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/26/2008 10:51:36 AM | Are you really that naive? If any guy contacts you, one of his motives is to eventually get you into bed unless he's gay! I can't see anything wrong or evil about this; this is just human nature at work!
However, giving out a phone number or asking to meet immediately without some conversational foreplay is the mark of an unsophisticated man. Finally, how sweet he is can't be determined without doing some dating!
The Eagle | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/26/2008 11:10:14 AM | | I met someone once on the same day we exchanged our first email. We had a great time, and saw each other several times after that. I knew his full name, address and phone number before I left the house, and for some reason, I felt very safe. But, I've never done that with anyone since. I guess I followed my gut instincts, and in that case they were right on. | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/26/2008 5:28:37 PM | | I just find it difficult to maintain a dialog via email, and that the person I am in contact with may not always appreciate it is going to take me a little time with sorting out my spelling to give my response . | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/26/2008 5:35:13 PM | Why wait forever? I think that the whole point of Dating is to meet someone that you know that you have an instant attraction with not just for the physical aspect but the personality as well. Not all men think that right of batt that they want to sleep with someone right away.
Its taking CHANCES. I have met numerous people for quite sometime & it is taking CHANCES whether it would end into just being Friends or more than that. What do you have to lose? Meet them in a public place, meeting for coffee or for a nice walk @ Stanley Park/English bay area. Life is too Short to worry and sweat about the small stuff. Go meet them, Take a chance, take a risk. | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/26/2008 5:38:42 PM | hi calichick25,
i would say just go for it.. what have you to lose honey?? as has been previously said you can always just leave... i dont see the point of loads of emails and phone calls etc.. cos in my experience you think someone sounds really lovely on the phone/ emails etc.. and then disappointed when you meet... it avoids that completely as no preconceived ideas..... .we all different in person and its about perceptions, plus for the big liars out there age/ weight.. etc you are not wasting your time on calls etc.. i usually suggest a lunch meet for coffee/ drink or light lunch... depending.. anyhow good luck.. xx | |
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| Guys asking to meet with you immediately
Posted: 7/26/2008 5:39:32 PM |
Message: I believe messaging and talking to people on the phone is a waste of time because, your whole perception of them in person is going to be totally different.
A lot of guys believe this and don't/won't play the email/phone game.
It's not a game, though. Many women just feel safer, and it allows us to get to know a guy, first. I've met several 'men' in person, but not before taking time to get to know them, here, first. And, I'm very glad I took that time to get to know them. Some turned out to be full fledged stalkers, some turned out to be married, some turned out to be people who had severe anger issues, and yet, others, turned out to be really nice fellas that I eventually met. Those who are in a rush...take a hike. I'd rather take my time to get to know someone, as opposed to being stalked, killed, raped, maimed or even yelled at because I disagree with someone. And, if anyone doesn't agree with that...well, that would have me wondering if they wouldn't agree to waiting, if I didn't want to jump in the sack right away too. No thanks...I'll be nice and patient, and remain safe, instead of a statistic. If someone else, like the poster above disagrees, so be it, but better safe than sorry! ;) | |
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