| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/16/2008 4:52:12 PM | In a relationship you have to deal with a woman who spends most of her time being unhappy because her life is not how she wants it. She wants more money, more excitement, more security, more status. She wants a new car and a bigger house. She wants you to do things she is thinking of without her having to tell you what they are. She is happy maybe three days each month, and doesn't like sex nearly as much as she did at first. She needs to be happy to like sex, and she is only happy when she thinks she has finally found the one for a great relationship. That lasts a week. Then she realizes it's not like a movie, the guy is real, life is the same, and she is stuck in a relationship that didn't fix her emotions. So she goes back to being unhappy only it's now your fault, and there is nothing you can do about it.
But when you're single, you can come online anytime you feel sad and look in on the forums at POF and remember why you choose to be single. You can read hundreds of complaints about men, unhappy expressions and wholly unrealistic relationship expectations. The only problem is you don't get laid, but you didn't have that in a relationship either. Choosing to be single is the same as saying it's not worth it.
Women are born with a natural ability to attract men and make men joyous and content. But they are themselves impossible to satisfy. And so men chase after women in hopes of being joyous and content, which we would be if women were ever happy, and were good companions who loved sex. This hope is an illusion. Men are not born with a natural ability to attract women or to make them happy. Men can only serve women as beasts of burden so that women can raise children. Young men go that route and try hard to make it work. Kids get born and raised, life continues. But in terms of the happiness we started out to find, it's just not there. That is why they make beer.
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/16/2008 6:55:06 PM | The only good point, as I take it, is that since he is not rejecting you for another woman, you can continue to date him, or do whatever it occurs to you to do to him, as long as you remember that he is not wanting anything more. I'm just going to linger on the edges of his beloved single life and annoy him like a fly, till he admits that really I am THE ONE. Unless someone else asks me out for this weekend
i know when i was single i was not looking for "the one".i was looking for enjoying life and going out with girls.if "the one"came around i would go with it.of course i seldom told women that i figured out early that you will get none if you say you are not hunting down"the one."
i found that most ladies did not understand why you would date someone with no thought as to if it would be forever. | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/16/2008 7:11:30 PM | | It means they have not found the one. They will date, and might sleep with many different women... but has not found one to hook them. | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/16/2008 7:49:47 PM | | For me it means I haven't ran into a gal that has blown my socks off. I could choose to be with a gal that doesn't make my heart leap out of my chest, so in that regard I am choosing to be single. But that's just me, someone else probably has a different answer. | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/16/2008 11:15:01 PM | A couple of things:
1) I like how the females have jumped on board to fill the poster in on what a guy means when he says something.
2) As with just about everything else, it means different things coming from different people. here's a concept: how about you ask the guy in question what he means?
I for one agree with Lizard: I am not actively pursuing anyone at this moment.
One thing stated on the previous page REALLY irks me: the person who said
I think it's akin to married guys who "choose to eat salads". It's not REALLY a "choice".
I find that very offensive and want to let the poster of the above in on a little secret: there are guys in this world who do what they want, when they want, and for the reasons THEY choose. To make a statement like the above just goes to show you just how little you know about MEN. Maybe your experience is with PW'd wienies, but there are some of us out here who live our lives by our own rules, no one else's...... | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/17/2008 8:22:15 AM | It means, simply--without the torture of nano-analysis so many women engage in in a vein attempt to understand that men are NOT complicated--that he chooses to be single.
Since educational systems, government social programs, major media networks, TV shows and movies have engaged in a propagandistic campaign of improving the self-esteem of women, thereby in effect of making them the centers of the political, financial, entertainment and social universe...it's perfectly understandable that women don't have a clue about men.
After all, the aforementioned entities have spent nearly 50 years and trillions of dollars re-packaging men as "evil" or "rapist" or "potential child molester" and of course members-in-good-standing of "The Patriarchy." It stands to reason that women have a bias against men and eschew male values and mores.
Yet, as Rentahusband--great name, DOOD--implies, women's sexist prejudice against men needs to be held up to the light of day for what it is. Go ahead and replace "Black" or "Jew" or "Hispanic" in any spot you've placed the word "men." If it makes you feel uncomfortable on a visceral level, then you are now aware of how many men feel about this brand of institutional and socially-condoned and encouraged prejudice.
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/17/2008 8:40:02 AM | > He says he chooses to be single
It's the male/Relationship equivalent of a woman saying she's totally frigid -- to you (the OP) at least. You ain't gettin' into his head no matter how hard you try or want to. | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/17/2008 1:23:31 PM | | it means we got sick and tired of it all, meaning the dating scene, the head games, etc. and need to take a serious indefinite break to clear our minds and get ourselves together again. | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/17/2008 5:52:16 PM | | He's single by choice? Does that mean he's celebate or that he dates women? If celebate, then you may as well presume he has spiritual or other intangible interests. If he goes out with women, he would probably get along better (or longer) with women who also want to stay single by choice. Next Q is Do they mean "single" forever, or not? And if not, will their individual personal habits stray beyond any reconciliation? | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/17/2008 5:53:45 PM | | Op,for me it means i havn't found anyone i would rather be with than without after getting to know them,i like peace and quite with little conflict as possible,life's too short for it. | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/17/2008 6:15:39 PM | I think he meant from a number of alternatives to cull, to elect, to opt, to pick (out), to single (out), to decide, to make the choice of stay single, or to have the desire/inclination/wish/preference of being single...
But, if he is emotionally stable he meant to have a cake and eat it too, not being a real man, is a mama's boy/sexually repressed/insecure/afraid of commitment/intimidated by a real woman...
According to Freud... he just wants a pony. | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/17/2008 6:57:54 PM | ^^^^^^ 
Your comment, Cubanguy, reminds me of that weird play, "Equus." [shivering from the chilling aspect of a naked young man running with horses] | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/17/2008 7:15:31 PM | | There is 96 F in Vegas today, I won't put my clothes on... but, don't worry I have a donkey and is not blind. | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/17/2008 11:02:54 PM | The guy is trying to inoculate you to his commitment phobia.
"I choose to be single" is a polite spin on "Wanna be my **** buddy?" | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/17/2008 11:05:12 PM | "Choosing to be single is the same as saying it's not worth it."
Exactly, I choose to be single because finding a gf and maintaining a relationship is just not very high on my list of priorities I have so many other things going on in my life why put unecessary pressure on myself? Finding a gf is just more torouble then it's worth and right now I just can't be bothered. My atattude will probably change in the future and if I met someone that really blew me away I'd probably date them but I'm not actively looking for anyone right now. It's just not a priority. I do what I want not what the masses expect me to do. | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/18/2008 2:16:51 AM | | It means what it really means. The person is single and they wish to stay that way for whatever reason. | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/18/2008 5:38:17 AM | So far the concensus seems to be:
50% say: it means what it means 
50% say: it means he wants a romp in the hay 
Thanks for the advice all! 
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/18/2008 9:19:54 AM |
So, given that you just meet someone and that is the answer they have given you, then there is still potential for developing a relationship then?
I mean, in a man's mind, you guys are automatically ruling out any chick that comes along?
No, not automatically. What it means is that most of us enjoy our lives as currently constituted, and that it would take one very special woman to change it. | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/18/2008 9:41:03 AM |
50% say: it means what it means
50% say: it means he wants a romp in the hay
Try again. According to my calculations, your split is fantasy. | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/18/2008 9:44:22 AM | | it means he has had many offers but turns them diown,, being picky ,, he flirting with you........ | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/18/2008 9:50:13 AM | | in my mind, it means just that, he chooses to be single. he does not want a relationship at the current time, and wants time to be himself and to be free... thats all | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/18/2008 9:59:21 AM | Poster, I think it means...you are not the one he is going to take serious. Cause if you were, and you had knocked his socks off, he would NOT have said "I choose to be single."
If that doesn't bother you...then it doesn't.
But if you want something serious with this guy...you probably won't get it.
I hope I have not upset you...but it's the same advice I give myself. | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/18/2008 10:05:35 AM | | I choose to be single because I have learned that even if women are good to be with at times, an ongoing relationship is begging for trouble. It has nothing at all to do with whether she is the right one. There is no right one. The problem is that for men and women a relationship means entirely different things. The women's version is not possible for a man to enjoy. And likewise, so that at best you end up stuck managing a kind of mutual compromise, and unhappy. It's not about finding the right one, it's that a relationship is not a recipe for happiness. Being single is so you can enjoy life, and then spending time with women is one of the things to enjoy. Or not, depending on what else you might want to do that day. | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/19/2008 9:10:40 AM | Poster, I think it means...you are not the one he is going to take serious. Cause if you were, and you had knocked his socks off, he would NOT have said "I choose to be single
this may be the case..but i know i had times in my life were i felt the same as this dude.i assure you no woman would of changed it. | |
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| He says he chooses to be single
Posted: 5/19/2008 9:32:54 AM | | I think it is important to be honest with yourself. And determine if you really think some guys are single because they want to or choose to. Because I'll say I am single without question because I prefer it at this time. Mainly because I have always been in relationships and find them restrictive. I don't like the feeling. Now I've dated women who were more carefree but when we got serious she started acting funky again. I'll elude a women if I think she is going to be a problem ie., attitude, always trying to find something to argue about. Also I find over the years I've gotten pickier. I am also use to doing things by myself so I'd have to get use to having a women around again which in the past has slowed me down. Now if I can find a women who is sweet, smart, have her own career and income, and who is interested in some things that I am I'd be flexible very quickly. Other than that. I think some guys are single because they might not appeal to some women. | |
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