| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/18/2008 8:34:18 AM | You're absolutely right, rivereye, as is galonthemt....it's amazing how complicated some people (the steerers, not the posters, lol) can make the simplest things.
It's all in the delivery - always has been, imo.
Actually, if most all sentences between couples started with 'gee honey....', the world could be a lot happier place.
HnH 
edit @ nicky down below....ain't that the truth on the originality of the thread, lol! | |
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| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/18/2008 8:36:18 AM | | Sounds to me like a woman that knows what she wants. Since they say they didn't realize they were doing it , its probably just an impulse act, such as leaning yourself in the direction you want the car to go. I don't think its worth getting upset about. See the humour in it and laugh it off. | |
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| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/18/2008 8:36:40 AM | OP, I have to say...you should get a Gold Star next to your name simply for not posting a redundant thread. This is possibly the most original topic I've seen in a long time...lol
I can't say I've ever had a woman steer me around by the thumb. Usually if we're walking somewhere and she wants to head me in a certain direction, I get a 'shirt tug' or she'll just grab my hand and outright pull me over.
The thumb? Never happened or if it did, I hadn't noticed.
Perhaps you could start thumb wrestling them? | |
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| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/18/2008 8:53:35 AM | It actually works very well when holding hands and trying to get through a dense crowd.
The leader merely presses their thumb gently into the palm of the follower's hand indicating the direction s/he is going.
^^BG^^ | |
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| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/18/2008 12:20:15 PM | Batgirl,
This isn't really all that subtle, and it involves a tight grip on your s/o's thumb with your thumb and forefinger. More of a proprietary grip, as it were. | |
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| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/19/2008 10:39:09 AM | Nicky2tone,
They'd always win at thumb wrestling, because my thumb is already pinned!
Batgirl, with all due respect,I believe we are experiencing something entirely different, this is more of a bridling grip on the thumb. | |
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| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/19/2008 10:45:53 AM | | I've never tried leading by the thumb. I certainly would be a lot less obvious than a leash and collar. ;-) | |
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| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/19/2008 10:52:46 AM | this sounds annoying.
then again i really don't tolerate anyone trying to physically move me rather than asking. I dated a girl who liked to try and push me in the direction she wanted me to go, and it wasn't physically abusive obviously as she was quite munchkin sized - it's just irritating, not all that respectful either. She was never girlfriend material anyway but when I broke things off with her she asked if it was because of this while trying to plead her case and I said honestly, it certainly didn't help. | |
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| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/19/2008 10:52:46 AM | there is the difference between a firm handshake, a "squeeze your fingers "handshake and a limp handshake. that is the only analogy that i can muster up. either she is a control freak or you are not listening to where she wants to go. sweaty hands is definitely a thought and if it's also feet--i'd ask my physician what to do with that!
i find it very odd that this has happened to you with more than one person. | |
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| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/19/2008 11:25:47 AM | Nah SerenityCW,
We usually already knew where we're going, and my palms weren't sweaty. I'm always open to suggestions, but I'd be reluctant to start holding hands if my hands were all clammy. This is just this weird "steering thing, and I felt compelled to ask because it had happened so frequently.
To be honest I'm surprised it happened to me so much and to others so little. It's not like a brigade of males are standing up here saying "Yeah, that happened to me, too." I had no idea it was such a unique and unusual experience.
...And when I think of all the abuse counseling I missed... | |
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| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/19/2008 5:21:08 PM | | Depth Perception.........or should I say lack of......you are being steered in the right direction....Don't take it personally. | |
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| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/19/2008 7:22:43 PM | Tu-ez,
I can only imagine, but it sounds painful, and everybody would be pointing and laughing, too.
Well, Boredbroad, if your S/O did it to you, you might tend to take it personally. After all, relationships tend to be pretty personal. | |
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| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/19/2008 7:37:43 PM | This is the strangest thing I have heard of here on POF...really now...but..., I read this.... logged off...and... came back...and hey.. you know something.. my EX husband use to twist arms...wrists...and yes.. do the Thumb Rudder thing to me....how odd that I recall that now.
Don't know how to read that.... he was a controlling type... I didn't realize that til after the end of the relationship...but.. anyhow.. it hurt when he twisted my thumb... I remember it now...and I did pull away..but didn't think much of it at the time.
well Im not going to get psychological here...just..well it is a control issue... she is leading the way...directing your movement...could possibly be a sign of things to come. | |
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| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/19/2008 9:10:58 PM | | watch how your hands connect. there are two ways, like when you clasp your own hands. choose the one that puts your hand "leading" or hold hands on the other side maybe to gain some leverage. this is a strange topic but i have paid attention to hand holding configurations. try it. and failing that, do that thing where you like squeeze her hand with your knuckles, keeps her honest. from the title i thought this was going to be about thumbs up butts lmao | |
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| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/19/2008 10:01:09 PM | It's the same as dragging you by the arm. Same thing. If you don't like it, shake your hand loose every time, she'll get the message.
On the flip side, men grab women by the shoulders and point them in the direction they want them to go. Is this any less rude? | |
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| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/20/2008 2:43:41 AM | Hi Western Rose,
It appears we should introduce some of my former S/Os to your ex, they seem to have common interests.
Just call me crazy,
I think for the thumbs up the butt topic you're looking for the other "thumb rudder" thread
WackMC,
I would say the thumb rudder is probably a little less obvious,personally, I never felt inclined to force a particular venue down my S/Os throat, if she didn't want to come, generally it was her loss, but I could muddle through solo when I had to. There was no need to drag,push,or steer her into a place she didn't want to be. Generally I found it easier to discuss where we were going, and make plans from there. | |
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| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/20/2008 11:24:02 AM | | I've never heard of the thumb rudder thing but my ex did lead me and I led her in return at times. It was a little more obvious though, if one of us wanted to diverge we'd either say something or just start walking towards whatever it was. Worked pretty well as long as I was paying attention to the widening gap between us and the eventual arm yank if I wasn't. | |
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| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/20/2008 10:29:14 PM | Intriguing.
Be pro-active. I often steer with a hand on the back of the neck, or sometimes under the arm. It sounds bad and sometimes when I contemplate what I am doing, it does seem kind of odd, almost like prisoner control, but never had any dramas with it and it is quite a good steering method. If I ever find myself slipping a wrist bar in for steering, then I will worry. | |
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| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/20/2008 11:02:19 PM | I would rather chew off both my thumbs then put up with anyone who thought this was
a great way to run a relationship. | |
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Naamah
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Joined: 11/22/2007
Msg: 49 | |
| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/22/2008 7:02:04 AM |
as you are walking, and the woman grabs the base of the guys thumb in a lock, and starts "steering" the direction you're walking
How silly. I would never do this! I expect my partner to follow 10 paces behind me and his thumbs simply wouldn't stretch that far.  | |
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| steering with the thumb rudder
Posted: 5/22/2008 7:06:37 AM | | I think I do this.. no I don't realize it, but my bf said that I point at where we are suppose to walk or drive.. haha.. woopsies! | |
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