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Posted: 5/23/2008 2:34:56 AM | Hey, I've done some reworking of my profile and would like some 3rd party interjections and suggestions (constructive if at all possible).
Do I really project being a douche with a heart of gold... or should I retool for extra douche?
Thanks in advanced for any future potential input.
War and hate,
the g man | |
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Posted: 5/23/2008 6:45:38 AM | You definitely project a number of things, douche being one of the more lighter descriptives that could be used.
So I’m going to lay this out flat for you here. As a Friends or Hang Out profile, although at 27 I’d be weary if you said Hang Out, it stinks but in a rotting fish and blueberry jam sort of way. You’ll attract flies. In terms of dating or a relationship, and ESPECIALLY Long Term you are shooting yourself in the foot. I think a profile should be an accurate representation of who a person is and you shouldn’t waiver too far from this that not even you recognizes who you are based on your profile. But your profile is disgustingly negative, quirky at times but generally unfunny, and other times you portray yourself as repulsive. The only thing missing is the chronological account of every zit you may have ever popped, or a masturbation log, two firsts I’m still waiting to see on this site and I will NOT be shocked when I do!
A normal person on here has limited potential matches and those are whittled down much further when you weigh in preferences, chemistry and so forth. You can cut that list in half about 7 times based on your profile. I’m sure you want to attract only someone who will be down with all that you’ve got to “offer” and that’s cool but you will likely be waiting a very long time. You’ve been here almost four years so that should be testament to what you have in store. Behave this way and continue to use that profile and you’ll be a lonely man for a long time. On a positive note you’ll have a death grip!
Your whole profile made me feel like it was one giant attempt to come off as funny as balls and unfortunately it didn’t do it for me. It did not, however, disappoint on the headline or from your OP.
If you are serious about finding a lifemate I’d strongly suggest you go and read the Profile Writing Tips and then come back when you’ve reworked it again. Or leave it just the way it is. But what you have now will not work, as it's bordering on offensive. | |
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Posted: 5/23/2008 8:06:33 AM | ^^^ What he said. Times two.
About the only other kick I want to take at this particular cat is that the name 'giggleparts' made me think that I was going to be opening a thread started by a female. Could be a detriment since you have a M4W profile. | |
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Posted: 5/23/2008 10:19:24 AM | Actually, a masturbating log would be kind of funny...
Yeah, I've had my share of email, a few dates, and even a long-term because of my profile writing ability. I don't really try to be funny... I am by my nature, so maybe it comes over the top sometimes. I can agree with you that it might be a time to change it up and go a different angle. How can you not find someone going back in time and beating up Scott Baio funny?
What's interesting is... I am showing me. It's just one side of me.
Aren't we all repulsive in some way? We all have our nose pick in the car moments, no matter how attractive we are.
I guess... when I think about profiles, all you see is the same bs, again and again.
You know... I'm down to earth and like grey's anatomy... It seems so derivative and lame.
How does one show their goofy side, but not in a bad light?
I'll take what you say under consideration, though. Also, the super negative tone of the first 2 posts has really got me licking my wounds... | |
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Posted: 5/23/2008 10:20:11 AM | | @bookrat - I thought the name was cute and irreverent... like me. | |
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Posted: 5/23/2008 11:25:39 AM | Why would you need an "angle" at all ?
I thought you liked being yourself. Angles don't belong on a straight shooter, right?
But I liked your profile really. You went off on a tear a few times, but you somehow reeled yourself back in, in time. | |
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Posted: 5/23/2008 11:30:59 AM | I don't mean angle in a bad way, I mean, how I would tackle the profile... the general slant or attitude. I'm not one of those guys... and I am a straight shooter. That's really been part of my difficultly with women in the first place (not the only difficultly).
It's like... people say to be yourself... but, then you get slammed for it... confusing. | |
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Posted: 5/23/2008 12:18:06 PM | No one is slamming you OP. We are merely telling you how your profile may be perceived. That's what a review is. Profiles like yours are becoming more and more common as people use this place as an outlet instead of MySpace, especially with MySpace cracking down on users hard. We really cannot add a whole lot of input to improve a profile like this without tearing it right down to the foundation and rebuilding it but then we wouldn't be keeping true to it's roots. You are who you are. All I can say is tone it down. Read it back to yourself a few times and ask yourself if this is the best possible representation of who you are. If it is then perhaps it's best just to fine tune it and leave it as I suggested. But to say you are a douche with a heart of gold says you are poser, because a) douches don't have hearts of gold, which is why they are douches, and b) your bad-boy image that you portray with the confidence/arrogance and the long hair and lifestyle is thrown out of a moving vehicle because you have exposed yourself as a softy. Women catch these cues easily. You need to decide who you are before you can really put this to paper.
As I mentioned before I'm sure it'll work for you to a degree. I know a girl very well who LOVES long hair. The guy could be 5'7" and three bills, with a face that looks like someone tried to put out a fired with a screwdriver on it, and she'd be all starry-eyed. She's go0-g00 for goldilocks. And you have an air of confidence to you, which is what attracts women to bad boys in the first place. But it'll take a unique woman to get past that profile of yours to want to message you.
Your difficulties with women are also something you should seriously consider. If it's you that is turning them off then you need to evaluate what's important to you. If you want a relationship and to have someone to love and care for in your life then maybe you need to consider possibly correcting some of your behaviours.
I can see how my tone may have come off a tad negative but it's not. I don't think you are an azz or that you are not a decent or funny guy in real life. I just think alot of what you are saying is a front, perhaps because of an illusion that this is what women want... someone who shoots from the hip and pulls no punches. Yes, true to an extent. But there are other variables to that equation. | |
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Posted: 5/23/2008 12:24:09 PM | I think I'm biased. I've seen your forum posts and already formed an impression of you, so I 'get' that you're doing your version of the "anti-profile."
The "anti-profile" takes certain negative traits and amplifies them for comic effect. I have my own version of one. There are some undertones of self-loathing in there, which I embrace and yet still find funny.
Call me sick, but your profile makes me want to date you. Maybe it's true what they say, "like likes like."
Some women out there...not a lot, but some...may respond to your 'anti-mating" call. Still, you do have your work cut out, searching for them. | |
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Posted: 5/23/2008 1:13:44 PM | @deuce98 - See, now that was a good post. Now you don't sound like a hater (or whatever the common vernacular is now). It's funny you think I come across as a 'bad boy' .... that's a first. I'm really not... I'm not a partier, I'm not a hurler of whiskey bottles, and I don't snort cocaine off hookers asses... In fact, since I've grown out my hair I get more misconceptions of who and what I am, than ever... Yet, I like the hair.
The douche with a heart of gold thing... it makes sense if you think about ironic comparison... or just straight up nonsense. It's all about the conflict of the heart, mind, and soul.
I'm pretty unassuming, yet can crank it up several notches above outlandish. That's part of who I am, it's not an act.
I tend to be lighthearted.
I can also be very serious.
I have a vast reservoir of knowledge, both applied and theoretical to pull from and this leads to an odd mixture in a person.
I'm not really a bad boy... at all. Yet, I have learned through my 27 years of life, that I need to be me and that also means I'm not interested in taking crap from people, or worrying about what every little thing is going to make someone think of me... But, there has to be a balance with this kind of mentality... like with all things.
There was a time where I had a lot of personal and ... well, nice things in my profile... but, I found that while it was nice... it wasn't the me I would want to project to the dating world. Perhaps, I should refine that concept and have both the zany and the soulful, once again.
I have met a few people in my life that can be total douches... yet, in the end, they come through in some way... for someone. | |
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Posted: 5/23/2008 1:22:12 PM | giggleparts
I have to agree with Ursula's perception on this, as I have also read some of your posts and have actually taken the opportunity to read your profile in the past.
If in fact, this is who you are, keep it as is. If it's not working, do some minor repairs and change it up a bit. Be yourself and I'm sure the right one will come your way, one that reads the content written and accepts and appreciates the person that you are.
Best wishes | |
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Posted: 5/23/2008 2:00:17 PM | I said you might be perceived as a bad boy because of the look mainly, but also because of your confidence exhibited in your written word. The douche with a heart of gold thing though is a bad oxymoron. It doesn't really work. Call yourself Cocunut then....hard, crusty, and mighty stubborn on the outside but soft and milky sweet goodness on the inside. Them ladies be wantin' to lick dem shitz.
I gotta ask though... you have all these weird song choices and some cool stuff. The Billy Joel surprised me but I accepted it until I saw the Carrie Underwood tune! It's a good thing you hid it at the bottom though! ;-) | |
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Posted: 5/23/2008 2:19:55 PM | Actually, I really like the Carrie Underwood song... there just something about it. A good song and a good singer are good... no matter the genre.
I like a lot of different music. Why just stick to one type, when there are so many good ones out there that don't fit neatly in one or the other... Why even pigeonhole yourself into liking only 1 or 2 genres anyway?
I happen to like cheesy 80's cartoons... and I love when they remake the songs using metal guitar.
I've had many headlines in my time... most of them were weird.
If you look at my pictures... you can clearly see I'm not a bad boy. I'm a big goof.... I can't help that I'm ruggedly handsome and so manly... it's a curse.
In-between posts, I'm fixing up my bathroom... I don't know why that matters... but, I have this tendency to be random. | |
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