| The boy next door
Posted: 5/25/2008 6:44:46 AM | | Is there really attraction to the boy next door? The type of guy that that puts effort into everything even though he will probably lose. There are genuine guys on here that are willing to drain the very life they have for the right woman but do womwn like this really exhist for the boy next door type? I happen to be one of those boys and am a little frustrated at what I can't find. Maybe I'm just to old fashioned in thinking. | |
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/25/2008 6:54:48 AM | | I can tell by your message that perhaps something has recently happened to you in which you believe there is no more hope. Maybe you've come across a **** or two (or maybe even 10). However, there are so many woman in the world, there has to be one for you somewhere. Maybe she's just "the girl next door" in somebody else's neighborhood.You just never know. If you're patient and weed out the women you're absolutely not interested in, the right one will eventually come along. | |
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/25/2008 7:16:50 AM | | I had a huge crush on the boy next door for years - fast forward to the future - had a short term relationship - he didn't turn out to be the guy I watched growing up! Too many hang ups and too much baggage! So what others saw from the outside was not what was happening on the inside! | |
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/25/2008 7:19:18 AM | | OP...yes women like this do exixt.... i would do anything (pretty much) for the guy i loved... as long as the feelings were mutual, im not going to be a door mat for some guy....... but what your asking is NOT unreasonable..... you just need to find the right person :)......GOOD LUCK! | |
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/25/2008 12:50:39 PM | Hmmm...well I would say, 'yes', that there is attraction to the legendary boy next door type. I would not expect him to drain the very life he has for the right woman though. What's that about?
You stay who you are. It can be frustrating and lonely. The one person will find you or you will find her. Possibly, you'll discover each other when you're not really even looking!
My boys next door are: to the left of me, 87 years old; to the right of me, 76 years old, and across the condo hallway from me, 33 years old. Damn! They're either too old or too young! I need some new neighbors!
Hang in there and chin up. It will all come about when it's supposed to.   | |
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/25/2008 12:54:16 PM | | I like the "boy next door" type, but not one that will drain his life for me...That is not MY description of a bnd... | |
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/25/2008 1:05:50 PM | | drain the very life I have for the right woman is a metaphoracle phrase meanning that I would do anything for her and treat her in every way that a could like a queen! Where I come from fathers raised there sons to respect, love, and devote his life to the right woman. | |
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/25/2008 1:08:12 PM |
Where I come from fathers raised there sons to respect, love, and devote his life to the right woman.
Well, that is a nice sentiment, but then I sure hope you expect the same for yourself in return then...  | |
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/25/2008 1:38:23 PM | What a great profile! And yes. The boy next door is great...thats what i like! That whole bad boy thing is scary.....I have kids and a job and a house and responsibility!
Respecting a woman is incredible! And being there for her is so very impoortant. I was brought up not to just say that you love, but to show it everyday. You and i would probably get along really well in that aspect...too bad we are so dang far apart!
Good luck to ya, cupcake! and keep on fishing! | |
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/25/2008 4:51:28 PM | Awe....the boy next door and apple pie...........the epitome of Americano men..............wish we had 'em here too.......*sigh*
OT: 'the boy next door' sounds so genuine...I would think they'd be in high demand? | |
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/25/2008 8:08:57 PM | You know that saying about girls - how there are girls you want to sleep with and girls you want to marry? IMO, that's exactly what we are talking about here in reverse.
Girls think they want a bad boy. Then, once they've been burned enough, they realize that bad boys are exactly that - bad - and that what they REALLY want is the boy next door. The boy next door is hot - but you have to be in the right frame of mind before you see it... and of course, by then, he's usually married.  | |
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/25/2008 8:50:46 PM | | If someone isn't interested in you, did you lose? Can you lose what you never had? I know many people aren't interested in someone who lives in a pity party and gripes about how badly they are always being treated. One, most women aren't looking to date boys. Two, there's not enough cheese to go with that whine, a woman could go broke buying that much cheese and still hearing about how awful you've been treated. Three, who cares about what didn't work, it didn't work, it wasn't for you, move on and find the right person instead of analyzing all the ones that didn't work out. It has nothing to do with being a good guy, it's about compatibility. Maybe you should be looking for the girl next door instead of the women who you've been trying to be with??? | |
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/25/2008 9:28:12 PM | | sometimes, the boy next door lives 3000 miles away in Fl.....*sigh*........................go figure......... | |
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/25/2008 10:09:42 PM | | Nope no boys, they must be at least 21 to date me. | |
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/25/2008 11:00:18 PM | LOL...the boy next door type is who their mom wants them to date. What they're looking for is someone with an edge...he doesn't need to be out of control, just something makes them go "hmmmmm".
OPie, you've got a great, 'nice' profile...but not many girls are going to read it and think "different" or "energy" or "fun". Keywords will be "sweet" or "nice".
I know, you got told your whole life just to be nice...but you're not trying to date your mom, aunts or grandmother. It's OK to be a nice guy...just don't push that as your first trait. Let that shine through as you get to know them. Focus on fun...on what makes you different (again, avoid the sugar coating) and most of else...express good energy in conversation, activities, etc..
And if you can't escape the nice guy persona, you're always going to be the one saying "I understand...but we can still be friends" when really you don't and aren't making the progress to understand why.
So let me bottom line it for you...whenever a girl 'knows' why she likes a guy (he's sweet, he's nice, etc.) she suddenly has the reasons to know why she doesn't like him. The best answer a girl can give about why she likes a man is "I don't know...there's just something about him." That's the person you want to be...the one that "there's just something about". Good luck.
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/25/2008 11:30:51 PM | In the home before this one, the boy next door was selling crack.
I can assure you that I was not attracted to him.
Besides, I am interested in men... not boys.
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/26/2008 1:55:22 AM | | Damn I guess i need to move. wait was that knock on the door. damn just the pizza guy | |
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/26/2008 3:00:02 AM | Quoted for truth...
I know many people aren't interested in someone who lives in a pity party and gripes about how badly they are always being treated. One, most women aren't looking to date boys. Two, there's not enough cheese to go with that whine, a woman could go broke buying that much cheese and still hearing about how awful you've been treated.
Dayna, you're my hero.
OP-would you date a girl that whined and cried that the "hot slutty" type got all the guys? Would you want one that complained, very loudly, that she was mistreated by guys?
Both of those types turn me off...QUICK. Course, maybe at your position...you'd take a microwaved ham sandwich.
Also:
The type of guy that that puts effort into everything even though he will probably lose.
Know what? that right there is your problem. Lack of confidence. Not even the uggos with low self esteem want a guy that lacks confidence.
1. I am a nice guy, that type of guy that you can bring home to your parents and can be sure that they'll like me. That's not arrogance, it's confidence.
First off, in your age group, most womens' parents will be senior citizens. They feel they're old enough to make their own decisions, so whether or not their parents like the guy they're dating is PROBABLY not going to enter their minds. It rarely enters mine and I'm a decade younger than you - Just ask my mom, she usually hates my girlfriends.
Also, having to SAY "That's not arrogance, it's confidence"...you have to POINT OUT that it's confidence? You're saying one of two things:
1:I don't believe this malarkey I'm typing.
2:This is the only thing I'm confident about.
I'm leaning toward #1, but #2 is a close...well...second. In a distant third, we have:
#3:If I had any confidence, I'd be confident about this...but I honestly don't believe this malarkey I'm typing.
I'm not making fun, or trying to demean you or anything...just pointing out what you might be missing. The first line in your "about me" also screams lack of confidence. You need to get that figured out before somebody else gets dragged into your train wreck of a life.
You need to work on your self image. | |
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/26/2008 8:08:02 AM | Maybe you can start a forum thread to promote yourself as a great guy who can't find a date?
I'll bet nobody else has ever tried to do that in the history of these forums.
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/26/2008 8:39:34 AM | | I would feel more attracted to the "boy next door" that to somebody seeking the thrills of life, as long as love and respect are present. | |
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/26/2008 9:44:27 AM | it's just a case of finding her op... i'm not sure where or whom your ideal woman is but there is aslmost certainly one out there for you. it's a case of not giving up hope and keep searching.
in answer to your question i'm sure alot of other women would agree that'd we'd love somone who would always go the extra mile for us. | |
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/26/2008 10:13:20 AM | I was once told by a gal pal the ideal boy next door is one who's bad enough not to be boring.
Be a good guy, not a nice guy. The difference? Don't mistake kindness for weakness.
OP, there's a defeatist attitude conveyed in your post. Do yourself a favor & work on developing your sense of self esteem. Make a positive change, If you always do what you always did, you'll always get what you always got.
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| The boy next door
Posted: 5/26/2008 11:54:01 AM | | Dude, that's probably the problem, the draining concept. While that is great once you're in a committed relationship, you need to tone it way down until you get there. Otherwise, you will smother them and my guess is you're coming across that way on-line, too and scaring them away. Chill out a little, let them know you a little bit at a time, not all at once. Women like some mystery and the bad boy a little. Even guys next door can seem mysterious and "bad", too. Give it a shot and good luck! | |
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