| Tell me what you think!
Posted: 5/25/2008 12:12:52 PM | | I would like to know what you all think of my profile. Is it going to far in the date section? Is it to crude. Are girls here going to know that I'm obviously joking? Does it read with a sarcastic tone to it? Tell me what you think! please be completely honest. I had friends telling me it's funny but then I have my doubts cause we kinda have a twisted sense of humor sometimes. | |
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| Tell me what you think!
Posted: 5/25/2008 12:17:54 PM | Nope. Not that funny. I don't even know where to start to tell you what to lose. Here's something you might do: Let your grandmother (or some similar elderly woman) read your profile, and ask her what she thinks of it. And then go through it, and ask her what you should take out. After she gets done smacking you upside the head you can get to work on editing it.
You can leave in these words: the, in, out, a, where, then, I , you.... | |
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| Tell me what you think!
Posted: 5/25/2008 12:18:05 PM | | Your about me section is pointless. How about actually saying something about what you do, things you enjoy, etc. | |
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| Tell me what you think!
Posted: 5/25/2008 12:24:02 PM | It doesn't make any sense, from the headline on. It doesn't even achieve...stupid. | |
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| Tell me what you think!
Posted: 5/25/2008 12:25:18 PM | | ok .. why the hell would I make an elderly women read my profile?! If you cant create constructive criticism your not being of great help. Even tho i did find your grandmother comment rather amusing. | |
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| Tell me what you think!
Posted: 5/25/2008 12:29:22 PM | | My comment was supposed to illustrate this: You need a filter!!! A filter that prevents everything in your BRAIN from being translated to your PROFILE! You need to make a good impression, OP, and your profile doesn't do this. It's not even funny. Think about what kind of person you portray, and know that some humor doesn't translate well to the written medium. The idea of a profile is to make women WANT to have contact with you, and it is totally inadequate in that regard at the moment. | |
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| Tell me what you think!
Posted: 5/25/2008 12:49:53 PM | I would like to know what you all think of my profile.
So far we didn't care for it.
Is it going to far in the date section?
Yes, IMO; definately too far.
Is it to crude.
Extremely.
Are girls here going to know that I'm obviously joking?
Some might, but you realise it won't me too many. Thereby, lowering your response percentage.
Does it read with a sarcastic tone to it?
Yes, too much so; IMO.
Tell me what you think!
We did in the simplest of terms.
please be completely honest.
Again, we were honest; so be careful what you wish for.
I had friends telling me it's funny but then I have my doubts cause we kinda have a twisted sense of humor sometimes.
They lied, and are now enjoying the last laugh; most likely at your expense.
I would suggest that instead of bashing the reviewers for giving their honest opinion, that you re~think the profile strategy that you are currently using. JMO. Try going to the profile writing tips at the top of this section; post back on this same thread with changes for round two.
Good luck | |
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| Tell me what you think!
Posted: 5/26/2008 9:01:15 AM | I like the profile. But then again, maybe it's because I have a similar sense of humour.
I don't really get your headline, but then again, I never know what to write in those things. | |
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| Tell me what you think!
Posted: 5/26/2008 10:23:32 AM | | OP, although this new profile is an improvement over the old one, good luck finding a woman who will even want to try to live up to your conversations expectations. I'm very intelligent, but if someone actually said to me "Blow me away with your conversational skills, you had better talk to me from a philosophical point of view." I would just be totally turned off. IMO just because you know things about existentialism, hermeneutics, phenomenology and positivism doesn't mean you have to start out a first conversation on these topics, or any other such philosophical bullcrap. It's just so freaking pretentious. And I would be totally turned off if someone expected such a thing out of me, especially right out of the gate. Good luck with this. And fix the spelling mistakes in your profile, they don't fit with your expectations in the intelligence arena. | |
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| Tell me what you think!
Posted: 5/26/2008 10:37:00 AM |
Everyone on this site seams to write a profile describing themselves. I scan profiles reading all the same thing. "I'm honest, like the outdoor, looking for something serious or no strings attached, someone I can have an intelligent conversation with.. blah blah blah." basically everyone is looking for the same thing. Is this what really works? Is this what I should do write a profile that will look like every one else's and just hope for the best.
Pointless drivel. DELETE By the way, if this was intended to be funny, it's not, if you really do NOT know, the answer is NO.
Everyone on this site seams to want the same thing; being able to carry an intelligent conversation. But I have yet exchange any witty or close to an intelligent conversation with anyone on the site so it's making me wonder what is an intelligent conversation? (anyone that was contacted don't take offense to this it's mostly an exaggeration of reality)
1. Small minds talk about people and maybe cars.
2. Average minds talk about the news and events.
3. Great minds talk about ideas and exchange them in order to grow as an individual.
You could be correct. But best left for first or second correspondence. DELETE
cause for me all they are is a box with wheels that bring me places.
Bring you or take you?
So maybe a little more about me. I try to stay active walking my dog, biking but I hate gyms cause I don't really understand guys that will go and pick up something to put it back on the ground. Seams like a waste of time.
We can prove through logic that the population of the universe is zero. So if we ever meet I'm probably just the product of your vivid imagination :P
This appears to be profound after reading what was previously written.
You have said NOTHING about what makes you UNIQUE, or what UNIQUE traits you seek in a woman.
Best wishes
OFCB | |
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| Tell me what you think!
Posted: 5/26/2008 11:20:58 AM | | I so have to disagree with you on the topics you consider to be intelligent. I like the term 'post-intellectualism'. Heard of that? Really intelligent ppl often try to tone their conversation down, not so intelligent ones try to impress you. I like to guess how deep the person is by not so many clues some one smart gives out. I have always been a book worm, when I was a teenager, I read half of my life non-stop,on a train, walking home from the bus stop, with the flash light under the blanket, past my sleep time, with mom checking on me....I'm not kidding! At the same time I always knew, that the woman is only smart when she is non-pretentious and its always better to look good, than sound smart . (And you can laugh inside yourself all you want at mens transparent attempts to impress you with their gargantuan brain). Otherwise its kind of a cute profile you have. | |
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| Tell me what you think!
Posted: 5/26/2008 11:38:35 AM | So what exactly is your angle here OP? You are seeking Other Relationship but to most that means you want a piece of azz on the side from your wife. But you have no wife. So what are you looking for then, because you’ve made no effort to inform the reader.
What you have done is insulted the reader by basically telling them their presence on your profile is a complete waste of 5 minutes that they’ll never get back in life. You’ve put down the whole process you are here to participate in. Most people who read your profile, IF they finish it, will say “then why the hell are you here?” and for good reason. Most of it is a rant, and a negative one at that. And then you pose a complete joke for a first date where this is where women look to for some validation on their thoughts. They read over your profile and get a good feeling but the first date is what brings it all home, and you decide to mock the reader once again.
If you are serious about meeting someone I’d suggest you go read the Tips threads in the forum here and take another go at it. You come across as a bright individual. Just a friendly tip… make sure your pictures don’t have you with beautiful women and try to avoid beers, especially captions about beers. We all drink alcohol for the most part but when you accentuate it the way you did it says that it might be ultra important in your life. Just a thought. Anyhow, take another crack at it. You may be familiar with this one, but “Sorry, Please Try Again”. No free coffee for you.
EDIT.
It appears I've only seen the softer side of this profile. And to echo Nursegirl, if you are going to proclaim to be an intellectual and demand an unprecedented level from a woman then you should be sure your azz is in check as well, as you've got a plethora of spelling, grammar, and syntax concerns within your text. And as someone else mentioned, smart people don't say they are smart and force intellectual conversations, just as comedians don't tell you they are funny as balls. They show you. So go ahead... show me. The challenge is on my friend, and I'm a tough nut to crack. | |
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| Tell me what you think!
Posted: 5/26/2008 12:52:42 PM | Thanks all for the constructive criticism. It's still a work in progress and I don't think it'll ever stop. I do have to fix some syntax and grammatical mistakes. That's my French Canadian self that always had trouble with grammar in any language. Somethings I never could grasp.
You may be familiar with this one, but “Sorry, Please Try Again”. No free coffee for you. Funny I love it .. copywrite that shit right now!
Other Relationship cause I don't fall in any of the other option I see in this at the present time. It'll change soon. Hey!... I'll take that piece of azz if it ever comes to that I'm open to it but not really the priority hence why it's not intimate encounter either. | |
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