| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/1/2008 6:43:04 PM | I've heard a lot of women want a man who works hard. Does this always mean working hard at his job? Or at life in general?
The reason I ask is because it's been pointed out to me that my attendence habits at work aren't the greatest. Not that my work habits are horrible, but, I'll be late on a regular basis, and leave early from my job also on a regular basis. I have amazing job stability (even if it is a sh!tty job), my boss loves me, and am up for a raise within the next couple of weeks...but I rarely put in more than 35 hrs a week (even though I could and I would have more money if I did). I make enough to cover the bills, and basic necessities for my girls and myself, with usually enough money to have a little fun on the side. I also don't complain about not having money (as it is a choice I make), I simply state the fact when asked if I can do something that I don't have the money. As far as I'm concerned there are more important things to life than working and money.
So basically, how important is money to you? If you have enough to pay the bills and live a decent life, does it really matter? | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/1/2008 6:51:26 PM | I think you have the right attitude about money, & I agree with you. Family and friends are more important than money in the bank. As long as you take care of all of your (& your kids') needs, and have enough to do the fun things that you feel are important, then I think you have enough!
I think the hard-working comment is just a result of some women finding that some men (NOT ALL) have not been hard-working, but lazy or irresponsible. To me, as long as a man isn't constantly unable to take care of needs & reasonable amounts of "extras" like an occasional dinner or movie or something similar, then I don't care how much money he makes/has.
I think if someone asks you to do something you can't afford, for a date or meeting, you could just let them know you don't have the budget for that & suggest something else that you could afford at the time. That way you are letting them know that it isn't just an excuse not to go out with them. As they say, some of the best things are free! | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/1/2008 7:30:20 PM | While I don't agree with poor attendance and being late, I totally agree with the rest of your post.
There are indeed a lot more important things in life than work and money IMO. Time is what is most precious to me...not material possessions...not money...not fancy clothes...just time.
And it's the one thing I never seem to have enough of. So even if I had the choice of taking a $150,000 job tomorrow or be retired at a fraction of that salary, I'd choose retirement.
Even if that job came with a Mercedes and a big fancy house, and retirement only came with a shed and a bicycle, I would still choose retirement.
I'm serious. I've had it. At this point in my life I just want peace of mind...and time. To each their own.
JMO | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/1/2008 7:43:07 PM |
While I don't agree with poor attendance and being late
Poor attendance was probably a bad choice of words, I go to work everyday I am able (minus sick days, the girls being sick - and not being able to find a substitude for daycare, or important appointments that can't be made out of work hours). Being late, I don't agree with it either really. I usually make an effort to be on time, although some mornings it is difficult to get moving and it's nice to have the stability not to have to worry about it. The fact that I could easily be able to put in 40-45 hrs, yet I only put in 35 was moreso the point.
Thanks for the replies so far,  | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/1/2008 7:51:10 PM |
Working To Pay The Bills
I think if you earn enough to keep you and your girls happy and healthy, that's what's important..
You choose to make your family a priority, which is what I think a lot of people don't do anymore...it's good memories that the girls will remember, not memories of you always working.
I insist on having at least one "mental health day" off for myself, every month from work. I could certainly earn more money every month, but I choose to look after me every once in a while, too... | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/1/2008 8:01:29 PM |
So basically, how important is money to you? If you have enough to pay the bills and live a decent life, does it really matter?
Nope...its his life, and they are his bills, same as my life and my bills are my problem. It would only matter to me if it should ever cost me anything... | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/1/2008 8:02:14 PM | So basically, how important is money to you? If you have enough to pay the bills and live a decent life, does it really matter?
Not really. I do work full time, but have choosen to take a position where the hours coincide with my child's school hours. I would rather be happy and live paycheck to paycheck then constantly stressed and not even enjoy the limited time I would have left to be a parent if I choose to work elswhere. As long as our basic needs are met, and we have some fun money left every month, I am good. | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/1/2008 8:26:21 PM | I agree completely and also think you have a good attitude towards this. I don't think I could ever last long with someone who was a complete workaholic, meaning all he did was eat work, breathe work, sleep work, etc. The old adage is true!; "Work to live, don't live to work".
I'd much rather be living paycheck-to-paycheck and HAPPY than be rich and unhappy. I don't need to live in a fancy-schmancy house, drive a fancy-schmancy car, wear fancy-schmancy clothes, etc. That stuff is unimportant. Your family's happiness (as well as your own) is what comes first. The rest are just mere luxuries I can and have been living without. Happily.
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/1/2008 8:35:09 PM | I was going to comment on the poor work habits but you cleared that up in a later post.
Money isn't everything and as long as you have money to pay your bills and don't spend more than you make, I don't care how much a person makes.
My problem is I seem to attract the guys that don't know how to handle/balance money and their wants. | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/1/2008 8:41:29 PM | | OP, you can always make more money but you can never make more time. Personally, I have no interest in a man who is a type A overachieving workaholic. | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/1/2008 10:51:42 PM | They want a man that works. The hard part is in bed. They want a hard man that works.
And buys flowers every now n then.  | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/2/2008 2:46:05 AM |
So basically, how important is money to you? If you have enough to pay the bills and live a decent life, does it really matter? To me, yes.
I'm very aware of the fact that individuals require additional monies for retirement than the governement pensions offer. So working extra to top up the savings for retirement is a very important aspect of life for myself.
Its all about balance. Money doesn't buy happiness, but it allows for a certain amount of security which in turn give peace of mind. | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/2/2008 4:35:46 AM | I realize your only 25 and I commend you for the extra time you are giving your girls but at some point you will have to think beyond today and have a plan for savings. Your girls will eventually grow up and hopefully be going to college, so you will want to have a plan for that. I know I know..... not something you want to think about now, but trust me I've been through it all and am now putting the grands through college. And it all comes much to fast.
So money isnt the most important thing right now. But when you get older ,and its not there it will cause stress. So even an extra hour or two a week, and putting that money away in a savings or growth fund for the future of you and your girls is smart thinking.
Good Luck | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/2/2008 5:48:34 AM | So basically, how important is money to you? If you have enough to pay the bills and live a decent life, does it really matter?/
Actually money is not important to me AT ALL but having money is very important
I love to have money to get rid of money
But overall I am sure a woman who sincerely cares for you doesn't want you to work hard for the money but maybe she wants you to work hard towards your life for a more comfortable life for you and the family and I am sure she would do the same. | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/2/2008 9:12:51 AM | Glad you cleared up the attendance thing because that would drive me insane. However I think there has to be a balance to life, between work, family and fun. I personally enjoy my career so I have to make sure I don't let it crowd my other phases of life. That doesn't make that a necessity for everyone else and I try to be very respectful of others' decisions.
Happiness in life comes in different forms and if you have found yours, you aren't living off of charity of the state or others, then it sounds like a good fit for you. The right person will see that you are happy with life and think there is real value in that place in life. | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/2/2008 9:55:58 AM |
Its all about balance. Money doesn't buy happiness, but it allows for a certain amount of security which in turn give peace of mind.
Money is for the rainy days, which I think is a lost concept for so many people. I'm glad my parents instilled this in me, as I'm now unemployed and I have absolutely no desire to look for work. If I kick up my frugal notch a tiny bit, I should easily be able to go a year without working and still enjoy some of the finer things in life. | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/2/2008 10:24:37 AM | | Late on a regular basis, leaves early on a regular basis and up for a raise soon? Let the rest of us in on this magical job! | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/2/2008 11:43:38 AM | Work ethic IS importnat to me. I don't really care about money..... but, I'd care that you are n't responsible enough to show up to work on time.... stay for normal work hours and work 40 hours a week. (to the other poster... 40 hours definately doesn't make someone a work-aholic) Leaves lots of time for fun and living life!
That's great your boss loves you but, you never know one day he might say "you're Fired!" You might push him/or her too far with being late and leaving early.
That's great you have enough money to pay bills... but, it would also suck if you don't ever save anything extra and you can't do some fun things because you don't work all the hours you should. | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/2/2008 12:54:24 PM |
I go to work everyday I am able (minus sick days, the girls being sick - and not being able to find a substitude for daycare, or important appointments that can't be made out of work hours).
Umm....sounds like your boss is pretty flexible there nocatch...maybe you really should put in an effort to be on time and stay to when you're supposed to.
However...that being said...Im all for as minimum amount of work for the maximum amount of money...which is why I now only work 2 days per week and still make more than the average weekly wage.  | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/2/2008 1:21:40 PM |
I usually make an effort to be on time, although some mornings it is difficult to get moving and it's nice to have the stability not to have to worry about it. The fact that I could easily be able to put in 40-45 hrs, yet I only put in 35 was moreso the point.
Wow,,you and your superior must either be buddies and he doesnt give a sh*t that you come in late and leave early or business must be doing very well and he doesnt care. I can honestly say that in every place ive ever worked at, lack of attendance was taken very seriously by management. Lack of attendance and often leaving early shows lack of dedication to your job and shows you cannot be counted on. Can you imagine if everyone at your work place chose to go in late just because it was 'difficult to get moving'? I dont know, maybe its becuz i was brought up with good work ethics and tho hell yeah i can agree there are times i just do not want to get out of my nice comfy warm bed, but its my job and i know people are counting on me to be there. | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/2/2008 1:38:10 PM | | well i don't fall for guys who are working all the time...theres making enough to live healthy then working to the point where the chick/dude is lucky to see there S/O due to the hours there working...its very annoying when you always have to hear "i love to go but i have to work" | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/2/2008 4:44:45 PM | OP - thank the lord that I'm not your employer. I wouldn't pay you for 40 hours when you only work 35. I'd pay you for the hours that you're working your butt off. You may get away with the monkey business with this employer, but the next one, you won't be so lucky. If you think you have job stability, you'd better think again. No one has job security, this day and age.
I'd like more than just "enough" to pay the bills. Nope, not looking for a sugar Daddy. I figure I can earn my own dough. What my goal in life is, financial freedom. The choice to work when I want, with whom I want, where I want, and basically have a HELL of a LOT more choices! | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/2/2008 5:00:14 PM | I think that when it all comes down to it, what matters is that you can take care of yourself and the girls.
I have always taken pride in working hard, and being able to pay my bills, and have some money to play with, each month. I also did not have children, so that makes all the difference. Do you only work 35 hours a week because you just plain don't feel like working 40, or does it have to do with caring for the girls?
The person who said you might want to work the extra 5 hours, and put the money away in an investment for the girls' education had a great idea! You can set up smaller RESP's to come directly out of your account, each month. (You set the amount, and you barely notice, cause it comes out at the same time as your other banking fees.)
Personally, I have always worked a lot. (60-75 hours a week, plus school) I enjoyed being able to support myself, pay for my schooling, go out if/when I was able, have investments, and being able to buy nice things. I didn't expect to work like this my entire life, and i'm in a position now where I can afford to work only 25 hours a week, if that's what I choose.
In a man, I think it's more about being able to work hard and care for his loved ones, rather than having a certain amount of money in the bank. Everyone wants to be able to live so they are not pinching pennies or deciding which bills they can afford to pay that month, but in a partnership (which is the goal for most people here) both parties are contributing, so our combined income should be enough to pay the bills, and put some away each month. That is the ideal situation.
I don't need to live in a castle or have fancy things to define me. I'd be thrilled to live in a plain house with great kids and someone who loves me. That's what's important. | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/2/2008 6:25:02 PM | how important is money to you?
well hummm w/the cost of living gone threw the roof!.. i would say its extremely important!..
As far as I'm concerned there are more important things to life than working and money
what could be more important then money & work?.. :41:..
need 2 go 2 work so u can have money 2 go out & support urself & ur children amongst other things right?..  .. | |
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| Working To Pay The Bills
Posted: 6/2/2008 7:36:21 PM | Although I was simply using myself as an example, I wasn't really expecting to have peoples opinions on how I handle myself or my own money. But no problem, I can accept your views. I'm happy with my situation, and have a plan for the future, which is all that really matters to me :) If anyone is really interested in hearing as to why I only work 35 hrs currently, please feel free to message me. I had it all typed out, but is technically off topic, and almost like broadcasting myself, but saved it for anyone who really wanted to know
Good to see that general consensus says money isn't a major issue to leading a happy life :D
edit :
what could be more important then money & work?..  .. need 2 go 2 work so u can have money 2 go out & support urself & ur children amongst other things right?..
I meant like spending time with family that you work to support. | |
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