| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/10/2008 5:48:22 PM | A lot of my friends have been married with kids for ages, and I'm still utterly uninterested in being married or having kids. I see them and I'm so happy it's not me. Sure, I'd like to have a lover and have some fun - but not marriage.
When you see other couples married for a long time with kids, do you feel happy you dodged the bullet, or jealous that they've been coupled a long time and you are still single? Do you wish you had what they have? Or do you feel like a bit of a freak that you don't want that "normal" lifestyle? | |
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| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/11/2008 4:24:53 AM | | I feel sorry for them, especially when they had to resort to buying a big bulky SUV, the woman obviously put on weight and the man generally looks complacent and beaten down. Im generalizing but I normally feel relieved that I've made the right choice. Oh, sometimes I give the husband a wink or a smile, just to make his day seem brighter. LOLOL | |
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| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/11/2008 9:21:26 AM | I feel happy for those who found the right person and make it a long lasting marriage.
I roll my eyes at those who end up divorced because they willingly chose someone whom they knew deep inside would not be a good spouse.
I feel bad for those who married and ended up divorced, when they both thought they would be ideal but realized they didn't gel as a married couple.
I also feel sorry for any children born, now having to deal with a broken family.
Do I get envious? Sometimes when it's the good strong couples. Most of the time though I see drama and more feel thankful I am not in that. I still believe in the idea of marriage, but it is something I will not rush into or take lightly.
It does make me concerned though for the state of marriage when I see married people tell me how lucky I am to be single an unmarried. How I don't have to deal with drama or lose all my money on the household and children.
It can't be that bad, can it? | |
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| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/11/2008 11:40:45 AM | It really depends on the couple...
The ones who get a long beautifully and obviously complement each other well I do envy....
The ones who are well on their way to divorce (whether they are aware of it or not yet), I am sooooo happy I didn't go down that road.
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| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/11/2008 4:46:18 PM | When I see a couple that's obviously married and happy to be so, I'm thrilled for them. When I see a couple that's obviously married and unhappy to be so, I'm sorry for them.
I think everyone's goal should be to live a healthy and fulfilling life with integrity. Whether that leads to marriage/kids or not isn't the important part. If that lifestyle doesn't fulfill you, then don't do it. There are other people involved and you should only go down that path if you find someone you'd like to walk it with. Marriage and kids isn't the end all be all of life, but if you find someone you'd like to share your life with and have kids with...why not? It sounds like a lovely experience with the right person. | |
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| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/11/2008 5:42:40 PM | I am happy for them if the relationship is based on love and morals. That is how it should be. Married for life through good times and bad. That is how the Creator meant it to be. I sometimes feel a little jealous because I never married nor had children. I feel a little cheated knowing it is a little late for me to have children. But meeting someone with well behaved children could be a blessing too. javascript:smilie(' ') | |
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| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/11/2008 11:23:28 PM | | It's just depressing... I think, that was supposed to be me! I am lucky in the sense that I still have a great relationship with my children, and a decent friendship with my ex. | |
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| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/12/2008 12:42:42 PM | | Since I have wanted a family of my own since I was 10 years old(tried but failed), yes I feel very jealouse. Sometimes I feel very close to giving up on having my own family. | |
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| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/12/2008 9:23:14 PM | I happen to have friends in good marriages. In fact all of my married friends are more successful (in my eyes) financially than most of my single friends.
I don't think anyone expects you to have children or take a spouse. That life may not be for everyone but for every person struggling in a marriage I'm sure there exists a couple that is happy and knows they made the right decision for them. | |
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| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/12/2008 10:02:40 PM | ~OP~ Maybe I'm odd in this regard, but I don't think anything when I see happy couples, whether gay/straight/poly-amorous/with children or without. That seems like a terrible waste of energy. I don't think I'm missing out on life because I'm single and have been for what seems a lifetime. My son is long grown and my life is my own, yet I don't regret how things turned out for me personally. "You complete me" is about the stupidest thing I've ever heard. I'd love to share my life with the right person, but I don't require that to feel fulfilled. If I'm fortunate in love in the future, great. If not ~ it certainly won't be something I agonize over. JMO  | |
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| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/12/2008 10:18:54 PM | I am with verygreeneyez
I don't waste my energy getting worked up on someone else's relationship.
If they are happy in whatever they choose to do then I am happy for them and I move on. I don't feel the need to get emotionally wrapped up in other people's relationships.
Some people feel the need to do that but I don't. | |
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| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/15/2008 2:12:56 PM | dosomething waived her right to remain silent and pondered:
When you see other couples married for a long time with kids, do you feel happy you dodged the bullet, or jealous that they've been coupled a long time and you are still single?
Perhaps "dodging the bullet" is what I think when I see young people who had no clue what they were getting themselves into, and are unhappily married with kids.
But I am in admiration (or maybe even envious) when I see a loving couple who has well behaved kids. It is rare, but it's a model that I would like to follow or attain. Some people see having a successful marriage and kids as a challenge that brings them pride and joy (yeah, that sounds cheesy, but I think you have to look at it that way to be happy with the sacrifices it will take). | |
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| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/16/2008 11:55:04 AM | It depends ....
If its a young couple in their early 20's I feel sorry for them because I can't help but feel that they rushed into marriage too soon regardless of how much they say they loved each other. If it's an older couple I don't feel so bad | |
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| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/17/2008 12:52:51 AM | I don't pay too much attention to people in that sense...I may notice the children and keep going...considering I have 3 heads to keep tabs on...LOL!
I like to see elderly people with their grandkids though, its like they are moving at different speeds...
Back to the point....I handle my biz and keep on moving... | |
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| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/17/2008 2:53:56 AM | | Not so good. I met a woman who broke it off with me because her kids didn't feel like leaving their friends. That's fine but I wish she would have asked this before she started to date. | |
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| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/17/2008 7:48:31 AM |
Not so good. I met a woman who broke it off with me because her kids didn't feel like leaving their friends. That's fine but I wish she would have asked this before she started to date. Sounds like a lame excuse! She probably just wasn't in to you enough... There's another thread going on in the forums about the "lamest excuse" you ever got. You should post your comment there! http://forums.plentyoffish.com/1673289datingPostpage3.aspx 
Seriously, it's irresponsible of someone in my opinion to start dating another person who's far away if that someone's not prepared to relocate (with or without kids). Some dating sites make that a Profile entry (e.g., will you be willing to relocate for the right person). Perhaps this woman was just looking to feel validated by dating someone... Almost sounds like a rebound incidence. | |
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| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/17/2008 8:31:15 AM | | Greenolives...........Of course I'm right wing. Success is built upon having a family to love more than yourself and making sure they have the tools to obtain their dreams too. | |
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| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/21/2008 1:45:52 AM | I feel a little jealous and sad, that possibly they've tapped into, found, or experience a depth of emotion, meaning in life, or interpersonal understanding that I may never relate to. I also feel happy and joy that the couple have possibly experienced, or are experiencing, these things especially if they love, and take joy in, their children. (In a non Michael Jackson way)
I don't want what they have, I would rather have/build my own. I do not feel like a freak or judge their life as a "lifestyle," to ascribe to but simply as their life. | |
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| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/21/2008 9:21:47 AM | Like most I don't pay a lot of attention to others since I'm living the life that I want.
Happily married couples are adorable to observe, miserable married couples make you want to poke out your own eyes.
I've BTDT with the married thing and to the outside world it looked blissful, but the fact was it wasn't.
I've found that I'm one of those women who makes a much better mistress than a wife. I need my own space. | |
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| How do you feel when you see married w/kids?
Posted: 6/22/2008 4:19:19 AM | | I'm happy for those who are happy and feel sorry for those who are not. I've never wanted children, but I have wanted to be married since I was about 16. I guess that's my problem -- wanting marriage and the joys of soul-to-soul until death commitment but sans children. I can understand why women aren't thrilled by that arrangement, but for me, it's always been more about finding a life partner than producing offspring. | |
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