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 elecbabe
Joined: 8/31/2005
Msg: 1
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Pretending to be a widow/widowerPage 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
I 've long had my suspicions that a very few people state widowed to get attention, but here’s the proof. Is it me just being over-sensitive, or is this a really crass thing to do!? Has anyone else experienced this?

Message to me:

Ahhhhhhh your so cute n lovely.....NO WAY are you in your 40's, you look my age ;). Let me send a pic to your email pls xx


Message to him:

Hi and thanks for your message. I couldn't help but notice that you are widowed. You are very young to lose someone. My sister died last July leaving her husband and 3 children, so I can to some degree relate to you. I suppose really I am a bit too old for you and I am looking for a proper lasting relationship with someone.


Message to me:

Ahhhhhh I feel bad saying this because of your sister but I was just playing...ive never been married or lost a partner

Im very mature for my age and you'd probably say im in my mid thirties if you see me, plus you said you like younger guys, you should give me a chance, let me send a pic to your email - mwah ;) xx



.....I did reply to this....but you get the gist of things!
 ~Kyn~
Joined: 2/15/2008
Msg: 2
Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 4:26:14 AM
He's a d!ckhead.


Im very mature for my age

I dunno any mature people who run around claiming to have a dead spouse.

 elecbabe
Joined: 8/31/2005
Msg: 3
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Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 4:31:46 AM
Yeah Kyn, that's what I thought. I did politely tell him he didn't exactly strike me as being very mature and he took it very well and apologised. I didn't say it for me though, I said it for the genuine widows/widowers who are just trying to get back on the dating ladder. It's got to be an attention seeking ploy!
 rdcnorm
Joined: 3/7/2007
Msg: 4
Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 4:37:19 AM
Some men and woman will do anything to gain attention of others, I would guess a man like that is far and few,, but like anything people lie, there are those who pretended to be in the service,, or impersonate a police officer,, con artists lurk in the shadows,, as they always will....it's up to us,,to figure it all out,, make good choices,,

by the way, his first email should have been a clue something was up,, there is no substance to that email,,
 stevelfun
Joined: 10/23/2005
Msg: 5
Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 4:39:57 AM
I was goin' to comment here about these types of people. However, they are SOOooo beneath comment.

What does that tell you when someone does things like this???

Apon reflection, these people have my sympathy - they need help.
 ceeceekitty
Joined: 11/6/2006
Msg: 6
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Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 4:50:28 AM
I'm very mature ........
sure and not into "head games".

And him confessing that he'd lied made you soooooooo want to get to know him.
NOT.

Sometimes I think there ought to be a hand with a boxing glove, on it, that would automatically pop out and punch a liar, the minute, they post a lie.
(Like the one Little Rascal's took out for a drive----yes, I've showed my age---
)

And everything else he had written is questionable.


ceeceekitty
 galonthemt
Joined: 10/31/2007
Msg: 7
Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 4:55:16 AM
Mature??????????? And being a window myself and having gone through 13 months of illness with my husband ,I resent that anyone would perpetrate such a lie. It's disrespectful to us that have been there...........................
 elecbabe
Joined: 8/31/2005
Msg: 8
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Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 5:03:33 AM
I agree galonthemt and I told him that in no uncertain terms. It's when people use tricks and lies like that that I despair of the human race!
 coarlan
Joined: 12/19/2007
Msg: 9
Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 5:07:40 AM
Well i am a widow.

if he sent me that message i wouldnt have even replied, proves hes a liar, and what else would he lie about?

coarlan
 Unclaimed_Meat
Joined: 3/30/2008
Msg: 10
Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 5:08:05 AM
Everyone (myself included) has been guilty of being insensitive.
But..... and it's a big but (<<<Hmmm reminds me of a different thread I was on yesterday, but I digress)............some people learn to be sensitive to others feelings, and some remain oblivious.
This was incredibly insensitive and I hope he has figured that out.
I can't imagine the pain of losing a spouse, but there's no shortage of pain in this world....
if you stick around long enough you will get your fair share.......
and then you will find out who cares about you.....
or you will stand alone and wonder why.

or ......He's a d!ckhead. .....LOL

I think Kyn may be more on track than me. Rock on Kyn !!
 afashionlady
Joined: 4/19/2008
Msg: 11
Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 5:12:37 AM

He's a d!ckhead.


Yes...what Kyn said...block and move on girlie!
 FishOwl
Joined: 12/4/2007
Msg: 12
Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 5:23:22 AM
I always wonder at the evolutionary recessives like this walking among us. Unfortunately, they are far more pervasive than first suspected and very difficult to detect. One wonders why he (?) -- after all, if one thing is misrepresented -- would start a hoax and then reveal it.

Interesting, what?
 Bob-O-Link
Joined: 9/24/2007
Msg: 13
Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 6:30:27 AM
Kyn is right on!
To pretend to be a widower when you're not is soooo wrong!!!!!!!!
We did not ever want to be where we are, but I look on my widower status now as a badge of honor! I took my vows seriously and stayed with her to the end, because she would have done that for me.
That guy is a complete liar, ***hole and a jerkoff.
Run, don't walk away, from a snake like that!
 ForumFilly
Joined: 5/14/2008
Msg: 14
Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 6:50:16 AM
Having been widowed in 1995, if someone did that to me, I would read them the riot act. Losing a spouse, or S.O. is not something to lie about. It is one of the most devastating things that can happen to a person. Someone so immature, cruel and dishonest is despicable and beneath contempt.
 Unclaimed_Meat
Joined: 3/30/2008
Msg: 15
Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 6:53:56 AM
Reminds me of a story I read about how many people claim to have won military honors.
Apparently, our current state of affairs is not conducive to truthfulness.
Good thing we are making so much "progress"....Geez I was starting to think the world was going to h*ll in a handcart......shows ya what I know.
 wizenjewels
Joined: 9/3/2007
Msg: 16
Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 6:55:03 AM
ive found it tends to be americans who just seem to be ignorant anyway!
 galonthemt
Joined: 10/31/2007
Msg: 17
Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 6:58:20 AM
ive found it tends to be americans who just seem to be ignorant anyway!



excuse me..........the OP is from England the same as you I don t think ignorance is limited to one Country......................That comment is just a little ummmmm ignorant
 EagleEric
Joined: 11/2/2006
Msg: 18
Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 7:06:03 AM
Don't you have any common sense? God many of you people are wackos!

The Eagle
 elecbabe
Joined: 8/31/2005
Msg: 19
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Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 7:10:37 AM
Wizenjewels

Sorry, but the man in question is indeed English.
Insulting an entire nation is not a good move!
 boots4852
Joined: 6/14/2007
Msg: 20
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Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 7:16:53 AM
i lost my husband of 37 yrs in february this year 2008 and i'd sell my soul to the devil to have him back, i can't beilieve that someone could sink that low to say that their spouse or partner has died that's the lowest of the low
i'm deverstated and really finding hard to get over my husbands death it an awful thing to happen to someone to lose your soulmate , the love of your life is soul destroying
and i don't think i will ever get over losing him
if prayers,wishes and dreams could come true he would be back in my loving arms where he should be,
we loved, adored and we were crazy about each other even after 37 very happy years of marriage and we were looking forward, when his life was snatched from us in 3 very short weeks i'm so lonely, sad, empty just want to be with my beloved tyrone
 *~*ChardyGirl*~*
Joined: 6/29/2007
Msg: 21
Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 8:29:45 AM
Thats really sinking low......
Very shameful behaviour......


 joannemeow
Joined: 2/10/2008
Msg: 22
Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 8:40:29 AM
boots, i am sorry for your loss. incredibly sad. and, yes, i have had several men tell me they are widowers. the last one put on this whole sob story of how he's a widower of 3 years and has never dated since she died, and he's raising his 13 year old daughter all alone. we continued to email back and forth. suddenly it became 6 years he was a widower! LOL. i was like, hey, pal 2 weeks ago you've been widowed for 3 years, now it is six. what gives?

NEVER HEARD FROM HIM AGAIN
 Diceman68
Joined: 6/25/2007
Msg: 23
Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 11:14:38 AM
Falsely claiming to be a widower is wrong in so many ways. Most men probably believe that it demonstrates an ability to commit, however, most women I have dated since the passing of my wife, seem to be more concerned with whether or not they will have to compete with the memories of my wife...

..and OP, you are very cute and lovely
 MoragDunn
Joined: 10/23/2007
Msg: 24
Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 11:24:26 AM
Despicable. Few and far between, I like to hope. Johnny Fairplay from Suvivor comes to mind! Except, he lied about his grandmother passing away.........

"Ahhhhhh I feel bad saying this because of your sister but I was just playing...ive never been married or lost a partner

Im very mature for my age and you'd probably say im in my mid thirties if you see me, plus you said you like younger guys, you should give me a chance, let me send a pic to your email - mwah ;) xx"

Some people will say anything to get laid!!!
 Blueskies123
Joined: 11/3/2006
Msg: 25
Pretending to be a widow/widower
Posted: 6/23/2008 11:40:59 AM
That's absolutely sick.

I've never lost a partner but I've lost both my parents..though that still doesn't by any stretch of the imagination compare to losing a spouse/partner.

Boots..my thoughts go out to you.
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