| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/7/2008 10:18:11 PM | Ok so I'm new to this site, and I'm really enjoying the forums, all the questions and answers, very help. Now it's my turn handle 
This might be a touchy subject for you men out there but I have to say SOMETHING.... In my past relationship (which has now ended) my partner was a young 27 year old, mentally and had a rather difficult time lasting more than 5 mins in bed. Now I don't know about you ladies...But that was very difficult for me to accept, is it just me or is this a deal breaker for relationships?
Opionions and comments appreciated!
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/7/2008 10:37:43 PM | Umm... Well i dont really suffer from that at all but i really could understand where your coming from.. i mean the first 5 min should be just warming up! did he try other things to help you along like performing oral for you first or toys you know some fore play before he jumped in there? I would have to say deal breaker i know sex isnt everything but BUT it is a major part of a relastionship!!! So if you cant enjoy something that is great and needed then it could just cause way more stress and not need arguments or embarressment for the guy....... thats just my opinion | |
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/7/2008 11:11:07 PM | | I never had any problems with this when I was 27.Now that I'm 44 years old I've had problems having an erection during sexual intercourse so I no longer have sexual intercourse but I still like to make a women happy.With my last girlfriend, I always enjoy giving her lots of oral and masterbating her with my fingers and dildos.This lasted a lot more than 5 minutes.I think a man should want to pleasure his woman but I think a man can still pleasure a woman without using his penis to do it. | |
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 12:00:37 AM | MMMMM yeah got to say that would be a deal breaker... In fact a major one.
And as far as just using toys and a tongue that is all fine and dandy, but the whole wonderful thing about intercourse is the complete connection and closeness that you can't get particularly any other way. Not having that would be a major kill joy for me, and I would feel like the whole act was really incomplete, cause as much as receiving is nice, so is the giving...
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 3:48:31 AM | First off this is not a bashing post of any kind but just my honest opinion relating to this subject.
A deal breaker? Just cause the guy cannot last a long time before he blows off the load? OMG how shallow have some women become in our day and age hell can all of some men become just as shallow if it is visa versa and our women let the flow go into the undies if we just lick your ear or finger you one time? 
Seriously here OMFG! If this is the new deal breaker in our dating world we live in today I see the sales of women's sex toys going way up due to alot of women not wanting to date guys who cannot last as long as they think a guy should. Haven't some of you "deal breaking women"heard of helping to train" you guy's penis to help him to learn to last longer? What ever happened to the long times of foreplay before ya go dipping into the pool of love? Whatever happened to women who got their men off a first time so he would last longer on the second run.
Hell when I was in my mid 20's my gf knew to get me off the first time due we were both so hot and horny neither of us lasted more that 5 minutes with out getting off but then on the second run it lasted a looooonnnnnnnnnnggggggggg time.    | |
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 4:31:13 AM | ^^^^^ Chuck-you made me chuckle!!
I was married to the marathon man-he could stay hard for hrs during oral copulation-but once he was inside of me-it was a three pump chump sorta experience. Now, before people start chuckling-he made sure ( or at the least tried ) to ensure I got off too.
Every person is different and though it can be frustrating to have to deal with a quick shooter-there is more to fullfilling sex than be pounded for hours. I enjoy foreplay-and after-play. Women, not all but some, can have multiple orgasms by different means-some men are content to rip one good one-than they have to wait awhile to re-load.
Suggestion to the quick shooters-rub one out before sex-while it's not a guarantee that you won't cum quicky, sometimes it helps. Also, switiching up positions helps too-pump slower-quick thrusting can lead to early eruptions. Bottom line- fast shooters would not be a deal breaker for me-what would be a deal breaker is if he never bothered to try to get me off at all- | |
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 4:39:03 AM | Yes in the past I used to be very premature, but I was very inexperienced then,but now I can at least last over half an hour on a bad night, sometimes longer on a good night, but for your guy to still be premature at his age ( 27) well maybe he is still lacks experience ? have you thought about that ? but eh in this day & age Im really surprised in his lack of sexual experience !!!
Best wishes From Tim | |
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eazk
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Joined: 9/8/2006
Msg: 8 | |
| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 4:40:26 AM | I think that when I was in my 20's and early 30's I had the same problem...5-10 minutes tops.
Now that I'm in my 50's I have the exact opposite problem, I can go for a long time, not cum, relax for a bit, then pick up where we left off. And on normal days this is not just a once a day thing. It all depends on the eroticism that goes with it...which then in turn reveals why the 5 minute problem when I was younger.
When I was younger...and an AFC with a wife who seemed to start her "Wow, I'm getting a headache" excuses an hour before going to bed, having sex was like a fantasy. As such...my fantasy mind at that time played it out and I orgasmed very quickly...as most good self-satisfaction fantasies will do.
Fast forward a bunch of years and I'm much, much more focused on my partner and her satisfaction...in fact, the more she responds positively (short of screaming and bucking which does tend to screw with the focus of the moment) the bigger and harder I get. The down side is that at some point after she's had several orgasms, I have to defocus on her and relax and have my own orgasm. That's not always an easy transition to make if you are really into your partner.
To me the difference here is whether you're focusing on yourself (your own fantasies) or your partner. I'm pretty sure of which one the girl prefers.
And Charles~...you're only 44...get thee to an MD and figure out what's going on. If it's not medical, you need to get some help inside your head. I'm not a Viagra/Cialis pill popping advocate, but if you need to prime the pump...anyway, your MD's Pfizer rep makes sure those MDs have boxes of samples so this shouldn't cost you.
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 4:43:39 AM | magical Mary Wrote " Bottom line- fast shooters would not be a deal breaker for me-what would be a deal breaker is if he never bothered to try to get me off at all-"
when we have had sex, my girl has not had her satisfaction, I reach for her toy & give her more oral to make sure she reaches orgasm too. Im not Selfish as far as sex goes.
Best wishes From Tim | |
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 5:58:12 AM |
Whatever happened to women who got their men off a first time so he would last longer on the second run.
Yes!!! When I've had partners that cum quickly, that is exactly what I've done... get him off orally and keep on him to keep him hard or get him hard again.... quite often he'll go for a much longer time the second, third and forth time around. 
Another trick to try is having sex in the dark.... most men are very visual and if you take that stimulant away, sometimes they can last much longer.
It is absolutely not a dealbreaker for me.... I consider it a compliment that he finds me so sexy that he can't control himself!! There are many, many other aspects of lovemaking/sex that can be enjoyed besides penetration. I will agree that I love the feeling of the closeness penetration brings, but it doesn't matter to me if that lasts 30 seconds or 30 minutes.... the closeness is still experienced.
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 6:13:44 AM | | A lot of guys may be upset with this statment but who cares I call it as I see it, Men are to caught up in there drinking buddies and video games to even think about, romance and forplay, just look at the beer commercials. In my mind romance and forplay is something that never stops. how many men come home and see there wife or girl friend in the kitchen and go put their arms around them and give them a kiss on the back of the neck and just hold them | |
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 7:02:10 AM | | I haven't had that problem since probably 18. Usually I have a hard time coming, so I tend to last for a long time. However, there are times that I am oversensitive, particularly during afternoon sex. But my gf now realize that at night we can go on for ever, really hard, but during those over sensitive afternoon sessions, both work at slowing it down. What that means is that you go slow, very slow, wait for her to come. The problem here is that then she may get crazy and want to head bang. Tell her to slow down, take a couple of deep breathes, and have a dry orgasm. This is something that both men and women can practice. Try to get a couple of the dry orgasms and at that point you will be a little more desensitized, so escalate until she comes. Even take a break and masturbate her. Done right, this over sensitivity can be turned into a couple of hours of bed activity. But don't just blame the guys. The girl needs to work with her guy into slowing down the action. The guy needs to realize that if he goes slow, very slow, it may drive her crazy. | |
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 7:16:05 AM | You must be really good...take it as a compliment.........
Maybe you should tell him about the Moustache Stall: When you're about to prematurely finish in the bedroom think of your favorite baseball players with a stache. By the time you get to Frank Viola you're guaranteed at least an extra 10-15 minutes! | |
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 7:40:20 AM |
Maybe you should tell him about the Moustache Stall: When you're about to prematurely finish in the bedroom think of your favorite baseball players with a stache. By the time you get to Frank Viola you're guaranteed at least an extra 10-15 minutes!
Dude, but couldn't this back fire? Think about it. Now you are in the stadium watching your favorite team and because you were thinking of baseball during sex, now that you are watching baseball all that comes through your mind is sex and now you have to deal with a raging hard on in public!!!
I don't know, I see a problem there. | |
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 7:50:29 AM | | What happens when she ages and grows a mustache of her own? She might even age prematurely. | |
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 9:13:19 AM | Some men are one shot wonders, and no matter how much begging, pleading, or gently suggesting will they go for a 2nd round. AND it doesn't have anything to do with the woman, that is just how they are, whether it is a mind set or what, that is just how it is.
I do have to agree with the poster that said well as long as he does what it takes to get me off, then it is good to go. That to is great, and why sex can be a deal breaker, it isn't so much about stamina for me, but rather if they actually care about their partner, and if anything they are doing is good for her.
There are guys out there that are in it for themselves, and if she happens to get anything, it is all secondary.
Fortunately that isn't the norm, but it is out there, and if sex is an important part of a womans life, as well as for a man, then it is a lacking in compatibility if their desires, or attitudes about sex do not mesh. | |
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 9:20:54 AM | Re the Opost
One of the first things aspiring men "lovers" of my generation learned was the crucial importance of "duration" (next to "erectability"). Via training our penis from the teen years, we have made sure that we reach an O as late as possible. It is all IME/IMO about training and control. | |
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 9:26:32 AM | Well... I must admit this concerns me.
I've never really had a sexual partner on a regular enough basis to completely figure out the control thing. I do the exercises when I'm alone, but the closest I've ever had to a regular sex life is once or twice a month.
I'd like to believe that, if I could find a loving and caring partner who was willing to have sex with me more regularly, I could improve that. Of course, I'm also more than ready to do whatever it takes to ensure her complete satisfaction - be it multiple rounds or more pre-attention.
I guess my point is that not every guy in his late 20s or early 30s is going to have the experience that most women would seem to expect. | |
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 9:29:11 AM | Also OP - you are very attractive and young...
That tends to make it harder for most guys I'm sure :P
PS I think I read somewhere that the AVERAGE duration of intercourse itself is only 2 minutes... That's an AVERAGE. So count yourself lucky for five! :P | |
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 9:32:54 AM | Maybe I am a little unique....but almost everything I do reminds me of sex.
....that makes me immature, not PREmature................
Stamina has never been an issue, and I don't even use the Mustache stall LOL!!!!
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 10:32:03 AM | smiles given freely said:
A lot of guys may be upset with this statment but who cares I call it as I see it, Men are to caught up in there drinking buddies and video games to even think about, romance and forplay, just look at the beer commercials. In my mind romance and forplay is something that never stops. how many men come home and see there wife or girl friend in the kitchen and go put their arms around them and give them a kiss on the back of the neck and just hold them
i agree with you completly,, there are a lotta men who no longer take the time to actually get to know a woman personality wise an her body physically,,most are like ok let me hit it an then i got to go i got s hit to do..
for most it's always about what thier buddies are doing an what sports are gonna be on t.v for the weekend an how much beer they can all consume in the shortest amount of time..
makes me think we'll hell if a guy enjoys the company of his buddies 24 hours a day 365days a year an always chooses them an watching sports an drinking, then obviously he should be f ucking his buddies instead of tryna date women..atleast he would be happier an he would have everything he wants right there with them plus the quality time factor is always there it would be like "hey man pass me another beer an while ur at it can you suck me off right quick during the commericals before the game comes back on".. | |
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 10:46:32 AM |
"hey man pass me another beer an while ur at it can you suck me off right quick during the commericals before the game comes back on"..
Thats so romantic.....I think I need to be held right now! | |
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 10:54:04 AM | "hey man pass me another beer an while ur at it can you suck me off right quick during the commericals before the game comes back on"..
skeptical but optimistic said:
Thats so romantic.....I think I need to be held right now!
ya i know i can feel the love too..it's almost to much for me i think i might cry,,an just think there are some men out here who are about as romantic as that an more..joy O joy there's hope for everyone..
o please sir tell me more about all your wild adventures as being a 2 minute man an how i should feel special because i'm woman number 105 on your list..an afterwards i have the privilage of getting up while you lay there in bed an going to the kitchen to make you a sandwhich.."sigh" "blushes" "sighhhhhhhh" an then i'm gonna go an tell all my friends how he's such a good lover an soooooo romantic..
ok now im just being a complete smartass but seriously ya know there some poeple who have heard this before an have had to go through it.. myself included has been down this road to more then a few times back in the day... | |
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| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 12:22:27 PM | This might be a touchy subject for you men out there but I have to say SOMETHING.... In my past relationship (which has now ended) my partner was a young 27 year old, mentally and had a rather difficult time lasting more than 5 mins in bed. Now I don't know about you ladies...But that was very difficult for me to accept, is it just me or is this a deal breaker for relationships?
You don't say how often you had sex, but if it was infrequent, that might have something to do with it. If you were having sex several times a week and it was still an issue, I don't know what to say, but I can see how you would become frustrated. You might try being a LOT more demanding in the sack. If all you do is lay there, then you aren't giving your partner enough to keep him occupied. | |
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eazk
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Joined: 9/8/2006
Msg: 25 | |
| Premature Men....
Posted: 7/8/2008 12:30:14 PM | If you were having sex several times a week and it was still an issue,.... and if that's the case, try going to several times a day until he builds up some endurance. Trust me, he'll thank you for it. 
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