77879
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Joined: 6/30/2008
Msg: 1 | |
| Question about "Favorites"
Posted: 7/20/2008 3:07:58 PM | Hi, I just have a question that I hope someone will help me with.
I am pretty new to this site, and don't get much mail. But when I looked into who added me as a favorite, there was three men that I have never received mail from or have ever chatted with.
My question is, why would someone else add you to their favorites, when they have never talked to you? | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/20/2008 3:11:35 PM | | The shy guy way of saying they are interested in you. Or at least that's how I use it. | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/20/2008 3:22:02 PM | I'm confused as well: Last time I checked, I was on 170 favorites list, but have had contact with very few!
I sometimes add people simply because they have an interesting profile.
Sandee | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/20/2008 4:27:21 PM |
why would someone else add you to their favorites ?
Cleavage , baby... | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/20/2008 4:53:31 PM | I think some do it out of shyness (and then I will add them to my favorites or email them if I'm interested, to help open the door). And, as mentioned above, there are those that do it for 'cleavage'...lol.
But, what I can't understand is: I have no cleavage pictures in my profile, yet, men from 1,000 of miles away will add me to their favorites and never contact me (and I'm not interested in the long distance thing). Do you have me on your favorites just so you can just look at my picture? I guess I should be flattered, but it kinda gives me the creeps (and I remove them).
Some enlightenment from the men on this subject would be nice.
Lisa | |
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77879
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Joined: 6/30/2008
Msg: 6 | |
| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/20/2008 4:57:59 PM | I can understand about the shyness.
I am very shy myself.
I was on a different site, and they had these little "ice breakers " you could send to the ones you were interested in.
Maybe POF should think about that.
JMO. | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/20/2008 5:13:55 PM | | I think that is our " ice breaker " on this sight. If you receive a favotite, you can keep or delete them. The ones I receive delete after a while, anyway. I like it because I have someone that makes me a favorite,and it makes me feel good that I do. | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/20/2008 6:10:59 PM | As a way of showing interest,yes, send a message might do the same thing..also a great way to network with friends one has made on this site..... | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/20/2008 9:39:21 PM |
The shy guy way of saying they are interested in you. Or at least that's how I use it.
That's how I kinda use it myself. If I'm interested in you then I add you to my favorite list. | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/21/2008 1:19:42 PM | | I use it to book mark profiles that I think I may be interested in, so when i get a chance to send a message its easy to find that person | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/21/2008 3:02:46 PM | I live in a fairly remote area, and all too often someone interesting has a “75 mile limit” posted as an email constraint in their profile. So I’ve often included them as a favorite to see if they would message me.
But on the same token I have and have had plenty of women who have included me on their favorites list, but who have never contacted me. I don’t have any constraints (other than photo required) so at first I thought it might be shyness, but when I went to message them I all too often would get only a short, one-time reply, or no reply at all.
So I’m still puzzled as to why someone would include another person on their favorites list and then never make, nor respond to any form of contract……potential stalker maybe ??  | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/21/2008 6:56:40 PM |
So I’m still puzzled as to why someone would include another person on their favorites list and then never make, nor respond to any form of contract……potential stalker maybe ??
I find this behaviour a touch odd myself. I only use favorites as a place holder or a place to put people I *know* and like. When I like someone, I say hello and let the chips fall where they may. I expect the same from a guy. I get being shy but this is not the same as getting shut down in a pub in front of 10 of your friends; it's all pretty darned private. While I don't chalk it up to stalker status (and I realize you were making a joke there Skjaries) I also think I would probably mow over a man emotionally who isn't as upfront as I am about these sorts of things, so I just don't say anything. | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/21/2008 8:38:20 PM | | That's been my stance, just let well enough alone. In the end, if they want to contact me, they will, otherwise they won't. The only time I contact if they've put me as a favorite would be if I couldn't have contacted them otherwise due to a constraint such as maximum distance or what not....but...thus far, those have turned out just the same as the others....not much in the response department. I'm just going to conclude that some things in this universe either can't...or are better left unexplained!!! haha | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/21/2008 8:52:50 PM | "Favorites" is the only way on POF to bookmark a profile for further consideration or simply interest. Someone could use it to mark someone for a friend they think would be interested. In the end, all it means is that your profile is in some way a favorite even if not of a romantic interest. It doesn't pay to over think it, just appreciate it as a complement.
Men and women are wired differently when it comes to sexual attractions. Generally, if a woman doesn't find a guy attractive, that guy is pretty much invisible. If he expresses any interest, including a favorites list, he may be thought of as some kind of stalker. "Unread delete" is the a common reward for those that try to make contact with women who don't "see" them. Many men on POF have pretty much given up making contact.
Men on the other hand aren't so sexually selective and will consider a lot wider range of women. "Players" are those guys who simply stop at the sex part and do whatever they need to do to practice breeding. Rejection means nothing to them personally although some find it a challenge. Whatever a women says in her profile means almost nothing. Its the picture that counts. Players send lots of "romantic" emails etc. simply because there is a sexual attraction. Rarely would they mark someone as a favorite without pursuing it farther. I would guess the guys that think of women as people instead of future sexual conquests are the ones most likely to be thought of as "stalkers" that flag favorites but don't rapidly make contact. In the end, it's not a very productive game for anyone but players. As a result, I'm pretty much here for the forums. | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/21/2008 9:51:47 PM | I also sometimes add someone to my favorites that when reading their profile, I find something interesting and am unable to jot out an email to them right there. I look at it this way, if they don't want me on their favorites, they will remove me.
Now the favorites lists that I am on, the majority of them are people that have attended one of the events I have hosted. There are some also that place me there, but have never attended an event. I go through my lists about once a month and if I have never rec'd an email from that person by then, I remove myself from their favorites. | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/22/2008 6:40:48 AM | Well, I have men as far a California and New Jersey that have added me to their favorites, never contacted me and (after some time) I've removed them. AND, THEY ADDED ME BACK! Don't they have to look me up to do that? Are they just keeping me there to LOOK at? (I tell ya, it kinda gives me the creeps!....silent stalkers? LOL)
The men that live closer to me does not bother me. In fact, I sometimes scan through them and will add them to my favorites (and sometimes email them) if I have not heard from them.
Lisa
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/22/2008 8:44:28 AM |
Are they just keeping me there to LOOK at? (I tell ya, it kinda gives me the creeps!....silent stalkers? LOL)
I have a particular "gentleman" who seems to visit my profile daily, but has never written and does not answer the emails that I have sent him asking "why?" Scary thing is....same guy has found my profile on class mates dot com and visits it about twice and week and always signs my guestbook! | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/22/2008 11:09:09 AM | | To think you might be a reminder that there are awsome people out there just that the stars, distance, schedules. etc. just aren't quite right. | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/22/2008 5:13:04 PM | | I understand from reading on another forum post, that some people also use the favorites to bookmark someone who's forum posts they want to follow. | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/22/2008 8:40:47 PM | ^^^yep, that's what I do alot. Heck fire, alot of people on my favorite lists are WOMEN, who I keep in contact with and I want to follow their posts. Visy Versy.
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/23/2008 7:06:38 PM | Usually when I mark someone as a favorite its for one of a couple of reasons...
1. I know them.
2. I'd like to know them and don't have time to contact them at that moment.
3. Can't make up my mind if I want to contact them or not. | |
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MEinNJ
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Joined: 5/29/2008
Msg: 22 | |
| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/25/2008 5:02:59 PM | | I have a question, If a women adds you to her favorites list but doesn't contact you. does that mean she wants to be contact by me first? I feel weird because it's like if she wanted to talk to me she should. I feel like a stalker contacting people that added me to their list. Any Women care to respond? | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 7/27/2008 8:05:19 PM |
I use it to book mark profiles that I think I may be interested in, so when i get a chance to send a message its easy to find that person
What he said. | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 8/8/2008 9:33:37 PM | | I put favorites on women I'm interested in, after I've emailed them. Probably 90% of the msgs I've sent to say hi are deleted without being replied to. I don't get it. All these women saying they want a nice guy, but none of them want to talk to one. | |
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| Question about Favorites
Posted: 8/8/2008 10:46:24 PM | I keep tryin to help you young hunky men!  gotta go for the homely gals and not the Barbies!  | |
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