| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/22/2008 8:44:19 AM | This is a not so serious topic. I know all of us fishies get matches and we have access to a chemestry section if we want it. I look at my matches and chemestry on a pretty regular basis. In fact most of the women i contact first come from one of those two things. My questions are:
1: does anyone know how pof does the matches? I have read some of mine and thought yeah i can see that. On others I look at it and think Huh? (the same thing applies on chemestry to a lesser degree)
2: what are some of your experiences with contacting or being contacted by people on these two lists?
3: What are some of the ways you guys and gals decide who to contact? (as in how do you find a profile thats worth reading)
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/22/2008 9:52:35 AM | Proven scientific fact that reading profiles will lower your IQ.
Well ok atleast help ruin your eyesight!
1. no clue, I think it is random from what I have seen (ducks from the POF gods who spend hours matching us up).
2. I have never contacted anyone from it nor has anyone mentioned they found me from it. On another dating site I did take the chemisty part to see what it was like and at the end I was more of less bored with it and thought if I was having this much trouble paying attention I can see how a ADHD man would do.
3. I look for smiles in profiles...Yes, unlike Playboy, I am just here for the pictures! j/k. Most of the people have contacted me but a few I have liked their comments on the forums, it shows insight to their thinking. | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/22/2008 9:20:12 PM | I don't know either... I can tell you that not too long ago I came across a profile that looked as it were written for me. I mean 99.99% of it was what I was looking for in a partner. Needless to say, I was excited.
We ended up meeting for dinner and we were not compatible in the least. Even though our profiles were a perfect match, our personalities couldn't have been more different.
It was truly disappointing.  | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/22/2008 10:06:06 PM | I've never even looked at my matches. I already know that I'm the only one who could possibly know who I might be interested in.
Kenny, I've had that experience too. It's so disappointing when you think you will really like someone and you find you're like oil and water. It just proves that the only way to know if there's any attraction or compatability is to meet in person. Everything else is just a fantasy and our own projections even when we've seen several pictures and talked on the phone quite a bit. Once in a while though, we're pleasantly surprised when we really don't have many expectations but we meet anyway and find we're much more attracted to someone after meeting than we thought we would be. | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/23/2008 6:24:27 AM | I think if they are in the right age-range, plus they look for the restrictions, then they just throw up everyone who meets that description.
I don't believe they read the profiles to make a match, that would take to much time.
JMO | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/23/2008 7:42:59 AM | | depending on where you live, I think they're the only ones within a reasonable age range that live within a reasonable driving distance...I get the same matches over and over...never pay any attention to them | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/23/2008 7:53:42 AM | | You can have all the lists and possible matches, yet what it all boils down to is meeting a person face to face and feeling that special spark inside of you. The feeling that never really leaves you as they constantly are part of your thoughts. | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/23/2008 12:41:14 PM | You know this is not an easy thing. I searched high and low and then just started looking at all the profiles I could find. I clicked on one that you really could not see the face clearly and he was not even dressed like any man I would jump up and say, take me please. It was a very simple profile and the photo of the man was someone that I would never have dreamed I would actuall pick. But I did pick. he even lives a long way from me. I emailed and we met. The chemistry between us was electric. We dated, we had fun, he was workaholic, we still had fun. Now, a sad point, he got cancer diagnosis and it did a mind trick on him... I waited, tried to be paitent and wait. Not a response, I would have had a few years ago. For about three weeks he stayed away, not answering calls, emails etc. All he did was go to the Dr. and work, work, work. The good part. He came back around and we see we have to look beyond the cancer, beyond the sadness of maybe no itimacy. We are working on all of it because it is something to good to pass up.
This could have a great ending. We are so excited to just hear each other voice and yes, there is much to offer and many things to solve the issues in the itimacy department.
We just need to step outside of our comfort zone from time to time. To embrace the differences and see beyond the shell we call a body. I am hopefull and positive. Not takign anything for granted nor pushing anything. We talk, listen and this could have a very good ending. We know that this is a chance in a life time. We are not teenagers but older and wiser. No time to waste. | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/23/2008 2:51:06 PM | I'm pretty sure your 'matches' are based on the selections in your mail settings and a couple things from your profile settings.
Experiment with it. If your profile says "Long Term", change it to "Dating" and you'll see some different matches. Change some of the options in your mail settings too and see what happens. The possibilities are endless. | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/23/2008 2:56:45 PM | The matches are based on LOCATION. CHEMISTRY doesn't have anything to do with it. You cannot possibly know if there will be chemistry until you are face to face, regardless of how a person answers a few questions on a poll. It's too easy to fake your responses to create the picture you WANT someone to see, rather than what really is.
Happy fishing, yall | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/23/2008 3:03:55 PM |
The matches are based on LOCATION.
Location is only part of it. True, it has nothing to do with Chemistry.
When you click on "My Matches", look at the line right below that. It will tell you the criteria it's showing at the moment and these are things you have previously chosen in your mail settings and/or profile. You can change any of those at any time to see different matches. | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/23/2008 3:21:32 PM | The "my matches" and "chemistry" test here are a crock of BS. IMHO
I will go it alone choosing my own "match" without the help of the "powers that be" of PoF. ~Just sayin' | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/23/2008 3:32:40 PM |
The "my matches" and "chemistry" test here are a crock of BS. IMHO
I don't look at "My Matches" very often myself, but I can tell you that they are a whole lot better here than eharmony. (can I say that here? )
That site makes me laugh. I had 'communicated' with a guy named Steve and with a guy from Wisconsin. Well, the next 50 matches they sent were either guys named Steve or guys from WI. What a joke. | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/24/2008 6:59:01 AM | | Now that was a good one Kayla. I especially liked it because e harmony refused to put me on their list, they said they could not find a guy like me a match | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/24/2008 7:52:28 AM | Not sure how POF determines the match stuff,I read a person's profile and see what we have in common.Had a few dates off the site's I am on useing that and they all were great so far.Not made a connection as of yet but still having a great time with a wonderful Lady is all good.  | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/24/2008 2:11:49 PM | | I guess my next semi logical question would be this: Since most folks do not use either chemestry or matches sent by pof. how exactly DO you choose whom to write to? inquiring minds want to know | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/24/2008 4:25:13 PM |
how exactly DO you choose whom to write to?
Ahhhh....... it's very, very complicated ya know. OK, not really.
For me, it starts at the top of their profile...
Age! (Yes, it matters)
Do they smoke? (I have asthma so it's important)
Where do they live? (Is it within a half days pony ride?)
Then we move to the pictures....
Is there a RECENT headshot? (You can kind of tell if it was taken sometime in the 70's)
Is there only one picture of him and 10 pictures of just his bike? (I'm outta there)
Did he say he was "Average", but has 3 or more chins? (I don't care how many chins he has, just don't lie about it)
Then we come to the next section....
Marital Status? (Needs to be available)
Looking for? (If it says Intimate Encounter, I'm gone)
Now we come to the good part....
Interests? (I just skim over those for now)
About Me? (Here we go)
I have to admit, if I see a huge block of text with no spaces or punctuation, I won't read it. Those run-on sentences are a bit hard on the eyes these days. (The "Enter" key was invented for a reason)
Depending on what is written and how it's written determines the interest. Again, I admit that I'm more interested in the ones that I can actually read. They are legible and coherent.
What they write will either intrigue me or make me gag. Some will have me shaking my head in disbelief and some make me laugh. (I like those ones) Some make me think that they are soooo full of themselves that they really have no time for anyone else.
BUT, the ones that are the best are the ones that make you believe they are being totally honest in what they write. Honesty and humor? I'm hooked!!
What bugs me the most? Is when a guy writes that he's looking for a "pretty, attractive, beautiful" woman and he himself is anything but handsome. They got guts, but it just doesn't seem right. (and the love of his life is probably that woman with the crooked eyes. Too bad for him.)
Sorry, didn't mean to babble on.
(Oh, just thought of something else. If a profile is so full of dancing, moving, annoying smilies, I'll pass on those too. That dancing banana should be shot.) | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/24/2008 4:27:47 PM | I look at a profile, see what they have to say (or not), ascertain whether I like what they have said and of course look at the picture. Pretty simple.
Of course they have to not be married and not looking for IE or messaged others for sex.
Edit: Ooops, has to be able to put more than a couple of sentences together coherently and intelligently. | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/24/2008 4:43:31 PM | I haven't contacted a man on POF in a long time. I do read profiles sometimes and get a kick out of some of them... like the 270 lb man who said if you aren't a size 2, don't bother writing. I bet his mailbox is overflowing  
Of course, I wouldn't write to anyone who says they don't like animals as I have 3.
I do look at the photo first, I think most people do. If I get really bored, I will click on someone's profile without a photo.
OK, going to look for some matches and write a couple e-mails!
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/24/2008 6:14:54 PM | Matches, chemistry, online dating, offline dating, pick anything - anytime - anywhere.
We could all choose a person off this site that we'd be content with if we so had to. I'm lookin for more than content however, so it's a crap shoot whether or not I ever come across it again. All the statistics in the world can't explain blind luck, which really is what findin that one person in a million comes down to. | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/24/2008 6:26:56 PM | All the statistics in the world can't explain blind luck, which really is what findin that one person in a million comes down to.
DITTO! On my profile, I used to say " It's a crap-shoot". ( Love that saying) Maybe I should edit my profile to include it again. Darn it....I wish I lived in Texas. | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/24/2008 7:42:33 PM | Matches definately seems to be based on location, but chemistry is loosely based on selections in your profile. I think they are just trying to sound a bit like eeeeharmony because that' s what people are looking for. Well, eeeeharmonay never was able to successfully match me on 27 dimensions (or whatever) and POF hasn't been able to match me on 2 or 3 dimensions...or...whatever! However, I always look and have fun doing it. I did write to one fellow and told him he was my 100%. We started writing and have become good e-mail friends. I don't think the chemistry for anything more exists...
oh well.. | |
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| matches and chemestry
Posted: 7/25/2008 10:24:54 AM | | K, I think the old parrothead only confused the issue. I know we gotta scan the profiles. If I see certain "flags" I am not likely to respond. My question for the inquiring minds is this. How do you determine which profiles you even want to read? If matches and chemestry are out I suppose you have the forums, and I have contacted some folks based on that. But how do you decide which profile, of the thousands on line you want to read? for me sometimes its a pic or a screen name that i see when scanning on line or my city. any other input? | |
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