| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 9:00:17 PM | wasnt sure if this is the right place to post this but anyhow heres the info feel free to ask for details
for that last 3 years my dads fiance has treated me like crap ,one summer when i was 17 i stayed at their house for like a month, they got into some kind of argument his fiance ended up walking away from him unhooked the telephone and threw it in my face and told me to get the F out , she has never apoligized to me for this till this day
after that she has yelled at me for all sorts of things and i honestly mean it when i say that i was innocent all those times she got into my face or ****ed me out on the phone
one time she told me she was going to change the number and the only way i'll have the number is if my dad gives it to me
she has managed to isolate my dad from the entire family including me , shes gotten to the point of being controlling , she has told him his money is her money
just today she almost got her ass kicked by my aunt for getting into her face saying my dad never signed a contract to pay money that he owes to her,( my dad WILLINGLY paid my aunt back for paying his part for him for something that happend long before she even came into the picture
now i found out she has been diagnosed with bipolarism, i dont really know too much bout that disorder but i know from experience of dating someone that was bipolar that the medication does not make change them it reduces their mood swings and their outbursts but they are still the same person
another thing i suspect shes schizophrenia , she told my dad i was not welcome to stay at their house to visit becuz i cant be trusted and i dont RESPECT her
, ironically even though all those times she got into my face i never copped an attitude i always found myself explaining to her and talk some damn sense to her
i never cussed at her i never called her names when i was 17 i actually burst into tears, i have never disrespected her let alone defend myself the way i should have instead of being a wimp
so my question is this , what do u know bout bipolarism from EXPERIENCE?
this is the second time my dad has isolated himself from me because of a woman has something like this ever happend to you?
i really dont know what to do i have told my dad i dont htink he should marry her, i told him when it comes to respect the road goes both ways,
i honestly do not know what to do. i think the only thing i can do is step back
its his decision to let a woman come between him and his only daughter and ruin his life | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 9:15:13 PM | | Those bipolar women are cruel and typically isolate to impose further control upon there partner sorry can't be more help my ex had it and all I could do was run for the hills obviously you don't have that option all I can say is if this isn't the first time your Dad has gone out with some mental head basket then he himself probably has some issues that need to be dealt with he's an enabler, co-dependant whatever it may be... All you can do is live your life and be there for your Dad when his house of cards come crumbling down even though it should be the other way around but that's life what can you do besides deal with the hand you got delt.... | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 9:17:31 PM | A friend of mine has a bipolar gf.
She completly tried to isolate him from me and his friends... she was/is psycho. Im not blaming her disorder at all.... but from OWN experience.. He would tell me that she would sometimes twist the stories. I proved it myself too. All he would do is apologize for her.
They're still together though... | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 9:20:04 PM | Excuse me?
There is nothing wrong with peopole with bipolar, depression, OCD etc....everyone is different. Some are worse than others, yes, however medication helps. I know many people dating people with bipolar, scizophrenia, etc and they are happy.
Dont give up, just be there but dont force yourself, when she finally decides to get help be there and comfort her, forgive as sometimes they cant even remember what they have done. These people are just like the rest of us, they just need a little more understanding. | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 9:21:35 PM | | I feel your pain. I've been married for 2 years and my wife was recently diagnosed with bipolarism. There have been some great times and I love her but the periods of mania and depression can be very hard to handle. At times it's like my life is on hold and I am fully immersed in trying to keep my wife in a stable and functioning mode. This disease has effected every aspect of our lives and I am growing more frustrated. Medication does help but it is not the answer. I don't know whether things will improve to a point where we will be able to advance and move forward together. I feel committed to her and I love her but this is not healthy for me or my children (from a previous marriage). Coping with bipolarism can be very difficult. I've always been advised to hang in there and not to give up on people but when your life is headed in the wrong direction does this apply? Love your Dad and be there for him, he will need you. | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 9:23:27 PM | "There is nothing wrong with peopole with bipolar, depression, OCD etc...."
Yes there is they are mentally ill, something is wrong with there noggin they are not normal they are sick in da head and the people that date them and are happy are not normal themself's...
Sorry to burst your bubble..... | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 9:23:59 PM | I have never heard of "bipolarim". Bi-polar is the new term for Manic depression.
A person w/ BP will shift from being very manic and hyper to being very depressed.
Her isolating your father sounds more like she is an abuser who is bi-polar.
You can go to wedMD for more information. Hugs. | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 9:25:19 PM | Your right, medication isnt the answer...they also need to be loved and not treated differently, they need counselling and support. They do these things without realising and I know from a personal experience that it is hard for them to recognise when they are doing it, and sometimes they rocognise it but they cant stop it once they have started, its like another voice saying 'NO DONT LISTEN TO YOUR BRAIN'. It consumes them and is hard for them to concur it but it can be done!
Would you treat someone with dyslexia or diabetes differently, or someone who was deaf, how would you like to be put as an outcast for something out of your control. So dont do it to others, the more you do it the worse they will get! | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 9:32:29 PM | People with dyslexia, diabetes or deaf people aren't cruel and don't realize it big difference and can have normal productive relationships.
" I know from a personal experience that it is hard for them to recognise when they are doing it, and sometimes they rocognise it but they cant stop it once they have started"
Exactly cruel and don't even know it or do know it and can't stop being nasty don't know how on earth they could have a normal relationship unless the other person was extremely desperate for love extremely understanding or screwed up themselfs... | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 9:35:12 PM |
now i found out she has been diagnosed with bipolarism, i dont really know too much bout that disorder but i know from experience of dating someone that was bipolar that the medication does not make change them it reduces their mood swings and their outbursts but they are still the same person
Bipolar disorder can effect every person differently, there are many different symptoms, actions, and disorders that a person can have with Bipolar Disorder.
There are three main categories that it is broken up into,
Bipolar I, Bipolar II, and Cyclothymia.
There is also a fourth category that is not really a category in my opinion, but a hybrid offshoot known as Bipolar - NOS that stands for Bipolar - Not Otherwise Specified. That's a person that has Bipolar Disorder but cannot be categorized by the first three so they are categorized into the fourth 'category.' Family and Doctors have to go back into the history of said person and find out which category they fit into so they are not miss-diagnosed and put on the wrong types of medication. Basically, waiting to see what they go into a Manic or Hypomanic state.
But there are many disorders that are considered to be types of Bipolar Disorder but have not been categorized.
I suggest that you just read up on it and find out what type she has then go from there. And no, a person with Bipolar Disorder on their meds and off their meds can be two very different people.
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 9:35:15 PM | I would date someone with bipolar, more so if they knew they had it, could accept it, got on medication and tried to control it.
Im not going to put them out in the cold. You want them all to end up alone because of something they cant control? Everyone needs love, everyone.
Id rather date a bipolar person than a murderer or an abuser, get your priorities straight. They are nice people. | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 9:41:22 PM | "Im not going to put them out in the cold. You want them all to end up alone because of something they cant control? Everyone needs love, everyone."
They do find love co-dependants, enablers, the fixeruppers, the rescuers other metal cases and the desperate are all magnets to eachother...... But its sad when a normal person gets sucked into there little world and then come out totally different people jaded and all.... | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 9:43:55 PM | this is what i know about bipolar disorder. They are delusional. They always think people are after them. You dont have to do anything to set these people off but somehow they always think its your fault and they will explain why too and it'd seem logical to them. Because they are so negative in every way, i do mean every way, example if you say yes, they hear no...and so it becomes an argument. I lived with one for a month, my brother-in-law's sister, and OMG she would twisted everything i said positive into negative. If i tried to explained what i meant then it'd become a big issue.
I never experience in person but i heard they are violent. They can scream the top of their lung. They are unhappy people always watching their back, like i said, they always think people are after them. They think its about them and only them. Like if they see you and your friend talking and laughing in the corner, if they are standing near by, they'd think you are laughing at them. Its weird.
Medication does not change or cure them but it can keep those emotion subsided. So medication can help them living thru normal life if they take it regular. Some dont like taking it because it has bad side affects.
I would never encourage anybody dating someone with this disorder. It's like living with ticking time bomb and you'd set it off without even trying. Its no joke.
Doesnt mean they cant have relationship, they just need a nonselfish special partner who has lots of love, lots of patient, lots of giving cus they'll need lots of attention who make sure they take their meds.
About your dad, i wish him luck. | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 10:00:19 PM | kit901 ....that is exactly what im talking bout , she blabbles on and on how she trusts no one , not men , she even told me she wasnt sure bout marrying my dad cuz she didnt trsut him , im like wtf you been wih him this long and u still dont trust him wat the hell are u doing then , almost every time she blew up was becuz she jumped to conclusion and each time she was wrong if she had been right i would have been understanding
also from what i know, she is not taking medications even though she knows she is bipolar | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 10:07:58 PM | | Bi-polar is a problem with the neurotransmitters in the brain. None of you know what you are talking about..........co-dependency has absolutely nothing to do with this. Sounds like your fathers friend is sick and needs to see a shrink. As for the rest of you giving advice I would suggest that you either read up on the subject or get off this forum. | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 10:46:05 PM |
As for the rest of you giving advice I would suggest that you either read up on the subject or get off this forum.
Get real your post was not a wealth of information and I've lived it and so has the OP and many other people either add something constructive or you should get off this forum you obviously don't have a clue...
Bi-polar is a problem with the neurotransmitters in the brain.
No shit sherlock but you could have left out "the neurotransmitters in" or did that make you feel smart using a big word like that, bi-polar is a problem with the brain...
co-dependency has absolutely nothing to do with this
Sure it does what the he!! does her father have for putting up with a bipolar bi*ch and enabling her to come between him and his daughter you have a better theory, I doubt it.
Id rather date a bipolar person than a murderer or an abuser, get your priorities straight. They are nice people.
They are not nice people they are only nice in the beginning to suck you in or they are nice if they feel they are going to lose you other then that there manipulative bi*ch's that any normal sane person should avoid for there own sanity... | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 10:57:03 PM |
They are not nice people they are only nice in the beginning to suck you in or they are nice if they feel they are going to lose you other then that there manipulative bi*ch's that any normal sane person should avoid for there own sanity...
I think you need to go do some research. | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 10:58:32 PM |
As for the rest of you giving advice I would suggest that you either read up on the subject or get off this forum.
I agree 100%. Honestly people shouldn't be posting advice when they obviously don't know anything ABOUT bipolar...that is just wrong. | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 11:08:59 PM |
I think you need to go do some research.
I dated one for almost 2 years that's enough research for me.
kit901 is right on 100% she know what she's talkin about
Honestly people shouldn't be posting advice
What advice besides avoiding mentally ill people can't go wrong with that I can deal with physical diseases but not mental anymore.....
You can take your 2 cents and stuff em.... | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 11:11:29 PM | | I know two people who are bipolar. One is my best friend. She went through a really bad phase a couple of years ago where she was killing hamsters, cutting and lashing out at people. I think i'm the only person she's never been mad at and that it's because she trusts me and knows I can accept pretty much anything she can do. Now that's she's on medication she's gotten a lot better. She has a boyfriend, friends and was recently reunited with family. I don't really know anything about your father but he's obviously willing to put up with his fiances crap. I think it's horrible that your fathers been torn from your family but I don't think it's just his fiances fault. Your father is choosing to stay with her. She can influence him and manipulate him but in the end staying with her is his choice. In your position I think i'd try to stay in contact with my father but avoid his fiance. I hope that helps a little. | |
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~Kyn~
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Joined: 2/15/2008
Msg: 23 | |
| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 11:23:11 PM | Honestly people shouldn't be posting advice when they obviously don't know anything ABOUT bipolar
Ok well I do.
I have a cousin who is bipolar and I also had a friend that was bipolar.
These people are very sick individuals when they dont have it under control and arent on medication.
It also doesnt take just a pill to fix it ...and can go for looooooong periods of time before they get it under control (years)
Part of their responsibility when knowingly afflicted by the illness is to be concerned enough for the people around them to do their utmost to keep it under control.
Sadly...this isnt often the case and they are VERY selfish individuals.
They hide their disease from many people...and unleash it on the people closest to them.
Its the same as many other diseases eg. substance abusers.
Infact alot of depressives are chemically dependant on mind altering substances of one form or another.
MANY substance abusers are actually depressives self medicating.
They WILL isolate people, become abusers (both mentally and physically) and if they dont do anything about it...your job is not to enable them.
IF people dont draw boundaries on their interaction with these people...they then become prone to the affects of the disease themselves through depression as well.
If they dont seek help...either get rid of them or keep them at arms length but dont jeopardise your own welfare or the welfare of children particularly.
Let professionals deal with it.
OP...your father needs to educate himself on this situation. | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 11:54:40 PM | If mental illness wasn't viewed as something dark and scary then people with these diseases wouldn't have such a hard time coping. A person with a mental illness needs a lot of support, both from family and friends and from mental health professionals. Taking medication isn't enough and if a person has had the illness for a long time without help it's to be expected that they will have developed maladaptive behaviors, like isolation, manipulation, etc...
Caring and compassion are the best approach to someone who is suffering with such an illness but so are firm boundaries around behavior. It's not OK that she threw a telephone at you OP, regardless of her diagnosis. Hopefully your father stood up for you. | |
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| she has been diagnosed with bipolarism
Posted: 8/4/2008 11:57:40 PM | OMG 'saveyourself69'... You are saying that people with bi-polar are crazy, have you had a look at what you are writing?
Have you actually realised that they are people too? Bi-polar disorder can be genetic and is an imbalance in chemicals in your brain... and has absolutely NOTHING to do with a persons real personality or attitudes. Bi-polar people don't 'suck you in'... like what is your problem, they are normal people who have a disease (yes it is a disease), do you think people with cancer, generally one in four are horrible people because they have something in their body they can't control and can no doubt make them moody?
My sister has bi-polar and so I have lived with it my whole life, and yes she takes medication but she is a functioning, loving, drop dead gorgeous, funny person and I love her regardless of the fact she has a mental disorder. She has also had a number of excellent relationships with guys who are not in the least co-dependant or whatever you said, they were just people who understood and were patient, they loved my sisters real personality and were willing to work through the hard times to help that beautiful person be seen more often.
You said you have have lived with it, and i'm guessing you didn't have a good experience with that person... but sorry to "burst your bubble" they are not all monsters who should be partitioned off from the rest of the world... | |
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