| | He dissapeared again... :(Page 1 of 7 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7) | Hey...
I have this problem and I don't know how to act... There was one guy from POF, whom I really,REALLY liked. He looked cute,mature,honest and everything that I would want in a man... After some time,we decided we should meet. I always wanted to visit London's Tate Modern Museum,so that's where we were supposed to go..
I was really excited and couldn't wait for the date, but two days before the actual date,he just dissapeared... I really couldn't believe it.. I didn't know what to think-is smtng wrong with him,maybe something really bad happened... (Please,DO remember,he had my phone number.)
He then reappeared after ten days,saying he had problems with his father.... I believed him and we started chatting again,he said he needed time to make everything right with his dad,since he moved out..
After some time we decided to try again and agreed to meet today... And what do u know.... I haven't heard from him for two days now... He dissapeared again... What do U think happened here...? The guy really seemed great and I really felt he was honestly into me... Could it be problems again and if he reappears again and says he is sorry,should I believe him...?
Or is he just an idiot,not worth my time...?  | |
|
| He dissapeared again... :(
Posted: 8/6/2008 12:12:17 AM | | He seems to being having some problems, so bad that they prevent him from calling you and canceling or taking a rain check. Realize he was a nice guy and there are plenty of them like your friend. He is busy with personal issue and let it be, when he is ready he will be the one looking forward to seeing you. I suggest you move on and dont wait anymore. Its easier to breakoff a dissapointment than to break off a two month relationship because he is in the middle of something. | |
|
| He dissapeared again... :(
Posted: 8/6/2008 12:12:23 AM | | you seem like a really great, level headed girl and he seems like a flake. He could be nervous or unsure about meeting you, but he could have contacted you during those ten days to explain whats going on, what he did - just dropping off the face of the earth! thats just pathetic - seriously how hard is it to send a quick text (takes about 30 seconds!) so you know whats going on. If he cant be considerate enough to do that then yes, he is an idiot and totally not worth your time. Find someone more mature and who will treat you the way you want to be treated. | |
|
| He dissapeared again... :(
Posted: 8/6/2008 12:12:32 AM | In my middle aged wisdom I have found that people who do this are NOT who you really think they are. They may talk a good talk, BUT the reality is they usually have someone on the side...
It happens once with me, after that I walk away and don't look back...
He may very well had problems with his dad, but a 2nd cancelled date... I would be don't with him, no matter how appealing he SEEMS... His behavior smacks of unreliability...Oh and drama... | |
|
| |
eazk
| | Joined: 9/8/2006
Msg: 6 | |
| He dissapeared again... :(
Posted: 8/6/2008 12:14:18 AM | Some guys do that...they can't handle the reality of meeting...
Some guys are still married and their wife isn't good with it...
But the key word is "guys"...immaturish behavior...you probably already picked up on it. Explain why you should be interested in someone like that?
 | |
|
| He dissapeared again... :(
Posted: 8/6/2008 12:16:39 AM | Ummm hon, I really think that you should open your eyes here.
I used to suffer from a condition where I was ALWAYS giving men the benefit of the doubt and always accepting less than acceptable behavior and because I liked them I managed to rationalize behavior I knew deep down was really inexcusable.  I have now learned.
If that dude REALLY wanted to see you, somewhere, somehow in 2008 he could have called for 15 seconds, sent a text message, sent a one line IM, email, carrier pigeon or some other means to tell you he couldn't make the date. He DID NOT hence you should know that is B.S !! If you really care and you really were disappointed you would try so hard BEFOREHAND to say something, you would not make 10 days pass. Unless you were in a coma, on a deserted island or something else, no crisis(esp some issues with your dad) is gonna take up every single hour of every day. And to top it off okay fine...forgive him once...but TWICE....come on now. It is obviously a trend and how come this stuff ONLY comes up when you guys plan a meeting Yeah right!
Dump him because obviously something shady is going on with him and he doesn't respect you or like you enough to at least even lie in advance and must think you're an idiot to believe him. | |
|
| |
| He dissapeared again... :(
Posted: 8/6/2008 12:20:31 AM | | For some odd reason, we always seem to excuse bad behavior when it comes to romance. He may have any number of legitimate excuses why he's not coming around, but for him not to contact you at all during this time? He is RUDE. He doesn't give a damn, obviously, about your feelings. Short of being dead or lying in a ditch somewhere, unconscious, this guy has no excuse whatsoever for not contacting you and letting you know what's going on with him. Apparently, this is not atypical behavior. I've had it happen I can't tell you how many times, and I've read about it countless times. If "Prince Charming" ever does show up again, read him the Riot Act, at the very least. I've gotten to the point where I don't even listen to the crap anymore; a guy pulls that crap with me these days, he's history. I have no patience for someone who is ill-mannered like that at all. | |
|
Algyte
| | Joined: 7/15/2008
Msg: 10 | |
| |
| He dissapeared again... :(
Posted: 8/6/2008 12:23:19 AM | Been in almost the same exact situation, with him falling off the face of the earth twice when I first knew him. Being inexcusably enamored with him, I stayed in touch with him for five months regardless only for him to eventually stand me up again, at which point I decided not to deal with him anymore. I figure he probably had someone in his life already, but ultimately.. don't know, don't care.
I met him from here as well.
Either way, it was so not worth it. Cut your losses early. | |
|
| He dissapeared again... :(
Posted: 8/6/2008 12:27:36 AM |
For some odd reason, we always seem to excuse bad behavior when it comes to romance. He may have any number of legitimate excuses why he's not coming around, but for him not to contact you at all during this time? He is RUDE. He doesn't give a damn, obviously, about your feelings. Short of being dead or lying in a ditch somewhere, unconscious, this guy has no excuse whatsoever for not contacting you and letting you know what's going on with him. Apparently, this is not atypical behavior. I've had it happen I can't tell you how many times, and I've read about it countless times. If "Prince Charming" ever does show up again, read him the Riot Act, at the very least. I've gotten to the point where I don't even listen to the crap anymore; a guy pulls that crap with me these days, he's history. I have no patience for someone who is ill-mannered like that at all.
Cosign. Especially the bolded part. I used to be so understanding aka dumb....but then realized that I have no time to be considerate and accommodating to CRAP. You give an inch and alot of people take a yard....so I just don't bother with the inch. Welll I am understanding still, but only when it really is legit....because I feel like we all know when something is B.S. but we want it to be true so we ignore our gut, but I don't do that anymore. | |
|
Algyte
| | Joined: 7/15/2008
Msg: 13 | |
| |
| He dissapeared again... :(
Posted: 8/6/2008 2:03:21 AM | | OP... I know how disappointing this must be for you... It's a real downer when someone decides they're just gonna pop in and out at will... Since we can't make a list of the names of people who do that, (it would be about 5 miles long), the best we can do is just keep moving and try not to be surprised when he continues to contact you from time to time. Most of us know that if we do what he's doing, the person we are interested in is going to move on... So.. that's what we do... move on and be glad to remove someone who is collecting charms for his bracelet... | |
|
| He dissapeared again... :(
Posted: 8/6/2008 2:19:06 AM | Let me ask you this...
If you were in a long term relationship with the fellow...and he had been dating you for some time, would it bother you if he didn't call to tell you what was up? Suppose he just disappeared for a couple of weeks, or he didn't call you for several days? Remember, you're in a longterm relationship, and he does this quite often!
Would you be able to deal with it? Would it feel right to you? No? Yes? If you answered no...good for you! If you wouldn't put up with it, if you were in a relationship with the person, then why would you put up with it in the beginning of a relationship? That's what you generally have to ask yourself. If it would annoy you, once you got into a relationship, why would you accept it, from the get go? By doing so, you are telling him, it's ok to treat you with disregard. | |
|
pie17
| | Joined: 7/28/2008
Msg: 16 | |
| He dissapeared again... :(
Posted: 8/6/2008 2:19:56 AM | Hey
once twice what r u waiting for a third time.imagine if u meet up and then he dissapears on u again.if he was honest he could have called saying listen i have a few problems but he seems is not even bothering to cancel and dont tell me he cant find a minute to send a text or even call.100% not worth ur time. | |
|
| |
| He dissapeared again... :(
Posted: 8/6/2008 2:38:18 AM | Someone did that to me once. From that experience, I can tell you that this guy will keep on doing this to you and to other women he meets because he has no respect or consideration for others. It's as simple as that.
These people come up with all sorts of excuses and apologies, too. I just find it hard to believe that he couldn't get to a phone in this day and age.
So yes, he is an idiot and no, he is not worth your time.
Best of luck. | |
|
| He dissapeared again... :(
Posted: 8/6/2008 2:46:30 AM | | Tell him to hit the road if he comes back, sounds to me this guy has other issues. | |
|
Algyte
| | Joined: 7/15/2008
Msg: 20 | |
| He dissapeared again... :(
Posted: 8/6/2008 2:47:04 AM | He is too young to be married and he looks just like the pic,we chatted on cam...
I'm starting to realise, that this guy is just an "emotional ****wit",like Bridget Jones would say,but I still kinda hope he shows up,and that's just pathetic,I know... :| | |
|
| He dissapeared again... :(
Posted: 8/6/2008 4:01:30 AM | you got infatuated with this (I assume) young guy, nothing wrong with that  and it will be hard to step back and forget about meeting him, but you'd be a fool to waste any more energy on this young man. I'm not suggesting that you totally boot him from your life, just to stop pining over him and waiting for something to happen, because it may be in vain.
one can't wish oneself into a relationship....it really takes 2. | |
|
| He dissapeared again... :(
Posted: 8/6/2008 4:51:46 AM | just.not.worth.it
if he's going to show such basic disrespect so early on why even set yourself up for the same kinda disappointment in the future if you were actually *in* a relationship with him.
you're young ,you're cute , you're fun, find someone who appreciates those things! | |
|
| He dissapeared again... :(
Posted: 8/6/2008 5:01:36 AM | He has your phone number, he could've called BOTH times and not stood you up.
Don't let him treat you this way. It's not respectful and courteous. He can use all the excuses he wants, but there is no excuse for not calling, in this day and age.
Drop him. 
Krys | |
|
| He dissapeared again... :(
Posted: 8/6/2008 5:12:44 AM | Well, he is definitely inconsistent, and his speech is not congruent with his proclaimed plans, such as living up to an engagement he made with you.
I would not waste my time with a person who does not at least call and cancel. There really is no excuse, except perhaps, this one, "I really do not want to see you today."
You could have made other plans if he simply had called to let you know that he will not meet with you at the agreed time and place. | |
|
| He dissapeared again... :(
Posted: 8/6/2008 5:17:18 AM | He IS and idiot and a waste of your time. He is playing games with you, no one is so busy after making plans that they cannot make a phone call if something has come up.
He is stringing you along and will continue to do so as long as you allow him to.
Be done with him and move on to someone that really is honest, sincere and mature that really does want to meet you. | |
|
Home
login 
