| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 3:43:00 AM | I remember when I was young and I always had this belief in love that it can conquer everything and it's the kind of feeling that you would die for that person. But why it only seems to happen in movies nowadays?
I hardly know any couples that actually do love each other, I met tons of married guys that look for sex or affairs elsewhere, all the guys I met either only look for sex or make up some excuses like they are not emotionally available and they dont care the least who I am apart from the fact I have a body. And when I did meet a guy and it felt so right and I thought we would be together for ever it just ended so easy one day because we were not at the same location and we needed to wait some months to be together. Obviously love doesnt conquer everything, not distance, not time, it's just so fragile.
Now I just really don't feel like I could have any faith in men or love. I am smart, a good person and attractive, I work hard, funny and I always treat guys right. My elder friends always tell me I would be a good catch for the right guy and one day I will meet him. But trust me I don't even see the shadow of him. The good guys all seem to have a gf or married already, the rest either like ****es or don't want any commitment after all or simply big losers. I really just feel like I will never meet the right guy and worse still I'm not even willing to give out my heart again any more. It sounds depressing but thats really how I feel.
Anybody feels the same way? Do we or shall we still have hope? | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 4:13:51 AM | Izhang, I really hope that its not all just a fairy tale but thus far it's been true for me. So I decided about 5 years ago that if I couldn't have what I wanted I would be single - and so I've been for the most part. I don't think my expectations are unrealistic but I feel like if I am going to wear the same pair of shoes "forever" they ought to be a good fit and vice versa. I still have hope, I still have healthy expectations, I am just not so enchanted with the idea of it all. I might just be meant to be alone forever - who knows what the universe has in store for me, either way I've made peace with it. I learned you can't wait for things to change to be happy, be happy first and then good things will come your way - in my case not in the form of love but other things and I have to say my life is very satisfying even without a partner. I hope that helps a little, its all very abstract sounding I know but you will get it - once you get there  | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 5:32:54 AM | | I was happily married to the best man in the world for 30 years. He was my life and I was his! We had happiness and love- then last year he died quickly of lung cancer. I know what love can be. I had it. I hope I can find love again. I have been hurt badly by someone I thought might love me- and I gave him my heart. I am not bitter and still looking for love. I hope I find it- but if not- I am OK. | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 5:57:50 AM | LOVE -No
I believe in the concept of LIKE
LOVE changes everything about you ..... for what ?
LIKE only accepts you for what you are and is HAPPY with it
Rather hear I REALLY LIKE YOU ... every day of the week | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 6:34:19 AM | | I do - and I don't...Love doesn't conquer all...and when it doesn't, wow does that hurt...I'm in a place right now where I'm trying to hold onto my faith in happily ever after. It would be a lot easier, and more comfortable, to just let it go, and settle for someone "nice"...in the end, I just can't make up my mind. So do I believe? I guess I do...do I have the strength to go for it again, being older, wiser, and knowing that just because two people love each other doesn't mean it will work out? That I don't have the answer to. | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 8:15:47 AM | Forgive me Izhang but you are still young. In this world we see so many things, from the archetypes of good and bad represented in media and society, to the subtle cuts of disappointment in friends and family. In youth we start with so many ideals and then just as we reach adulthood we see so many of them break and shatter.
But Izhang, that does not mean all our youthful ideals were wrong or worthy of being cast off. Love can conquer anything and everything, but we have to learn to whom we give our heart, that is the part where the movies have lead us astray although some have tried to set us back. I have seen the worst of people in the worst of times, but I have also seen enough that i keep hope. Despite all the very good reasons to believe that people aren't worth it I have still seen enough to believe in and keep moving forward. And while i have been ill used in love and relationships, I still find reason to believe that there is someone for whom this has been worth the pain. So should you :) | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 8:30:28 AM | well, I may still be young, but maybe when I do meet that guy I'm 50, and I look different and do not have the best I could offer any more, forget about kids if I ever want any! Or, maybe when I turn 35 I just get desparate and settle for a nice guy I could like???? Or, maybe I will die alone.
Pathetic either way. Don't even like that thought. | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 8:45:39 AM | | LOVE...No...I'm affraid all my hope for a honest relationship or MAN has ended...the men Now adays are like you said...after what they can get or looking for the best or MORE even while married!,,,I guess faithfullness is dead :( | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 8:50:29 AM | No, I never worry about finding a partner (a relationship) or getting love from another human being as a couple (maybe when I was younger and didn't know any better). Even though ( I believe) we were created to love others, I don't believe that it's ok to want to be loved so badly that we lose a sense of hope or have a lack of faith, or become needy, or wanting just because we don't have someone, or we can't find someone to love us. I believe it's a state of mind. If you’re happy with yourself and love yourself first (not selfish love), you don't need a man, or woman to complete a total state of happiness. It's a balance within the state of mind.
Once you reach the point that your just as happy with yourself "alone" as you would be with someone/anybody then you have conquered that fear of separation. Until you learn to love yourself and be by yourself, you will never find the "right" man/person of your dreams.
I wish you luck in becoming whole and learn to love yourself first above all others, and then the pieces of your life will come together.
Yes, I see love all around me, and I have all kinds of faith in love.
Chela
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 8:55:12 AM | i have hope for love but my belief in it from another person outside of myself and god are quickly fading.......i think love comes from within ourselves......a lotta people disagree with this but........they might wanna change their minds because i doubt love is gonna withstand what it did in the old days.....society has changed too much.......too many selfish greedy people out there now......coupled with the fact that we don`t "need" each other as we once did for survival.....i think faithfulness and "love" are on the way out.......i know dam well that marriage is out...look at the divorce rate...... | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 8:59:55 AM | | far as not giving ur heart out again....most of us feel that way after a few bad hurts......i`m at that point now also......u r NOT alone.....i know some guys at that point also....it`s not just the women who get hurt......most guys turn to only wanting sex after they`ve tried the love thing and been burned bad a few times by user women....goes both ways...... | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 9:01:43 AM | Men ask themselves the same question. We get the same responses back. It seems the concept of meeting someone new on this site is rare. This site is to meet other people but to also hedge our bets and have some other POF’s on the side in case if the relationship does not work out. We have all been hurt before and none of us what it again so we make sure we have enough safety nets built through internet dating to make sure we won’t be alone in case a relationship does not work out. I think women are on the site saying that they want love, honesty, loyalty and so on….then and this is where all of us are guilty…we ant to meet that special person but will keep on the line others while we hedge our bets and won’t fully commit to seeing if this one person is the one.
Love…. it is as over-used on this site as “honesty”, “integrity”, “are there any good men left?”….We all want to be loved but some are so scared of the downside of it..the hurt and loneliness when it does not work out. | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?ack and
Posted: 8/15/2008 9:16:25 AM | Hey, That sounds pessimistic. Its all a matter of time and it will happen wjen it does. Love is a beautiful feeling and beautiful thing. Like all beauty it is in the eye of the beholder so you will see it only when you want to. We all have break-ups or things that do not work out but trust me when we will believe they will happen. My first break-up left me in agony and disbelief for six months and I am into my second one now that hurts even more but what I gained was the experience that love gives you and wont put it behind for anything. I know there is someone there who will bring all of it soon. So keep it up keep believing and live life king size. everything will work out great.
cheers  | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 9:34:30 AM | No, I absolutely do not believe in true love. never saw it never had it never heard of one couple EVER being truly happy......Some women THINK that their husband is happy and some men THINK their wives are happy......Its funny the blinders people put on.
No I definately do not believe in true love in the least! | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 9:37:09 AM | No.
I use cynicism as a protection. You cannot get hurt if you expect nothing.
Dating is so freakin' emotionally exhausting.
Love takes work and time. In a age of instant gratification,...
dree | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 9:37:30 AM |
I remember when I was young and I always had this belief in love that it can conquer everything and it's the kind of feeling that you would die for that person.
I had that belief as well OP and STILL do. I am 43, so if I can still believe in it, so can you. A good man will come along for you. You are very young and have plenty of time. Just have faith and think positive. Never settle for second best either. Good luck. | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 9:39:24 AM | Yes I do still faith in love. I have only been in 2 long term relationships. They were my best friends at the time we were together. But as you grow older, sometime you end up wanting different things. I don't think there is anything wrong with that. It doesn't make them or you a bad person because it didn't work out it just shows that you are growing as a person and are getting ready for the next stage in your life. Sometime we get luck and that person may also want to go in the same direction as you and if so that is great. If not well thats just a part of life. I still love them both very much and have been blessed by being able to have had them in my life and have learned from them as well. Now I am ready for the next chapter. Love is what keeps me going. If this next chapter and I suppose to be alone for a while well then thats the plan and I will make darn sure I make the most of it and learn lifes lessons along the way.
Cheers and good luck 
I hope you find what ever it is you are searching for. - Cat | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 9:43:51 AM | I will try to answer your question even tho it be your choice to make but with pos.info hopefully you will make a pos. choice, as the least we need is another person with fears and doubts and negative thoughts which then you yourself would become part of the problem rather than part of the sollution.
Of course there is hope maybe not for love but there is for true love and the difference between the two is simply, yet very importantly the word true. Perhaps the reason you are having trouble believing and finding a true love is because sadly there are to few people who are actually true to themselves especially in todays world.So a lack of truth is one problem ,fears and doubts the others.So my advice is be true to yourself and learn how to recognize a true person. Many people have fears and doubts due to past injuries of the heart,so no longer have the courage to go down the road of committment,and of course some are just plain users and false even to themselves for many reasons usually lack of wisdom.I suspect your past love may have been a false love ,for if it was true it would have sustained a few months and being a few miles apart.
If you want to find true love then be true to yourself and find someone with the same ability and then you shall find and have true love and true happiness with another.Dont give up hope stay true and stay positive. | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 9:48:51 AM | wow your only 24 years old and you already feel that cynical about love.thats pretty sad.at least wait till your 35 LOL
i agree with what u said tough.i also dont know many couples who are really together cause they love each others.most couples i know are either fighting evryday cause one or the other disrespected them,lied to them,cheated.or some of them are real happy pretty much in general but only cause one of them is cheating and the other one doesnt know about it so as they say ignorance is bliss..and no im not being cynical cause for example in the last 6 months i saw like 4 girls on here looking to meet someone saying in theyre profiles that they are single when all along i knew theses girls were dating theses guys i knew.most of them i tought they were the perfect couples and in love and all.So in response to your question i still do have faith in love but its just getting a bit thin with all that i see around and my personal experience.but i guess the die hard romantic inside of me is still hoping that there is some people out there that still do feel the same way i do. | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 9:50:43 AM | | No, I have come to believe that there is no such thing (anymore). I fell in love with a man that I met on this site, oddly enough only lives about 15 minutes from me. Everything else is more important than me - I've been stood up, no promises have ever been kept, finding OTHER women is more important than someone who really does love him. This has truly been the most painful situation I have ever been in. I've tried to believe that love exists; how wonderful it would be to have someone to curl up next to at night, someone to hug you and kiss you for no reason, someone who is always supposed to be there (I want what my mom and dad had). | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 9:52:21 AM | message 9'
quote from u:'guess faithfullness is dead '
no its not dead.im a very faithfull guy always been and always will be and there are other guys who share that value im sure but were just a rare breed theses days i guess.
same with the faithfull womens.from what ive seen over the years they are very rare too. | |
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| Do you still have faith in love?
Posted: 8/15/2008 10:00:43 AM | I feel sorry for those who have never had true love. I had it with my husband. When he died people commented on how when speaking of either of us it was always Jack & Dixie...never one or the other. We were the exception to the rule? I hope not. I have known many couples like ourselves, and I do believe in TRUE love, through thick and thin, from start to finish in my case. Pity the poor soul who has not experienced this emotion, and I know that someday I will feel it again.
Good Luck to the rest of you. | |
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