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Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !Page 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
Ok, if you're morally higher than the Cheech & Chong on a Jamaican vacation, skip this thread.

However, if you've come across a funny analogy which pertains to either dating, the opposite sex, relationships, or sex, add it to this thread.

Here's a gooder that I came across:

Women are like pinball machines. You put money in, you don’t get anything but a good time, and if you smack them around too much, it’s game over. A restraining order is the Tilt of life. Smack it hard enough and you’ll break the machine. Then no one has any more fun.

BB
 Tessav
Joined: 2/6/2008
Msg: 2
Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/18/2008 8:41:56 PM
Men are like busses, there's another one along in 10 minutes. The secret is to be careful which one you ride. A joyride is fine, but if you have a destination in mind, don't get on the wrong one!

And of course the perennial favorite... The best way to get over one man is to get under another.
 ~Duffster~
Joined: 5/7/2007
Msg: 3
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Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/18/2008 9:18:11 PM
Often you may hear that Math is like sex, here are a couple of examples:

Both typically begin with a lot of hard work and end with a great but brief reward.

Both merit undivided attention, but mathematicians are prone to think about one while doing the other.

There are many joint results.

Both involve long and hard problems, and can produce interesting topology and geometry.

butt my favorite has to be

Most people wish they knew more about both subjects.
 ~ Cndn Girl ~
Joined: 2/2/2007
Msg: 4
Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/18/2008 9:44:57 PM

Ok, if you're morally higher than the Cheech & Chong on a Jamaican vacation, skip this thread.


Damn restrictions!
 LeoRejean
Joined: 9/14/2006
Msg: 5
Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/18/2008 11:34:32 PM
nice guys are a dime a dozen, the mr. wrong ones are a dozen a dime, hence why women seem to find the wrong ones more n more and settle for the wrong ones.
 easyguy71
Joined: 8/4/2006
Msg: 6
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Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/19/2008 3:21:17 AM
"Women. Can't live with them...........



Pass the beernuts."
Norm, from Cheers.
 AltaLariat
Joined: 7/25/2008
Msg: 7
Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/19/2008 6:17:23 AM
Many women are looking for Mr. Right, but in the meantime, they get married.

A hard man is good to find.
Mae West
 Hot Chili
Joined: 7/14/2008
Msg: 8
Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/19/2008 7:24:45 AM
Men are like parking spots. All the good ones are taken, and the rest are handicapped.

Women are like parking spots. They're whores and liars.

http://www.tshirthell.com/shirts/products/a1046/a1046_bm.gif
 Helen Waite
Joined: 4/26/2008
Msg: 9
Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/19/2008 8:52:28 AM
Ya know, I'm finding it hard to see the humor in the last one. Wonder why?...
 Diva_31
Joined: 6/24/2008
Msg: 10
Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/19/2008 10:23:25 AM
Finding the right man is like finding the perfect pair of shoes. You have to try several shoes out until you find the one that fits just right.

Or the one I hear the most...

I'm looking for Mr/Ms Right, not Mr/Ms Right Now.
 easyguy71
Joined: 8/4/2006
Msg: 11
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Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/19/2008 11:59:42 AM
Diva, what about the " I was looking for Mr. Right. I didn't realize his first name was Always." one? I don't hear that one too often out here but it still would apply, no?
 Diva_31
Joined: 6/24/2008
Msg: 12
Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/19/2008 12:53:55 PM
easyguy - LOL Mr Always Right....I've dated guys like that in the past...and they've always turned into Mr Wrong.
 LeoRejean
Joined: 9/14/2006
Msg: 13
 Shaun~N~Die
Joined: 1/3/2008
Msg: 14
Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/19/2008 4:44:06 PM
The old,"Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?" pertaining to women.

One for women about men:
Why buy the pig just to get a little sausage?
 Diva_31
Joined: 6/24/2008
Msg: 15
Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/19/2008 4:52:26 PM
leo - which one are you? lol
 ason
Joined: 11/4/2005
Msg: 16
Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/19/2008 6:00:18 PM
speaking of math -

add the people, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and multiply!
 ~*GEM*~
Joined: 5/6/2008
Msg: 17
Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/19/2008 7:05:55 PM
I've had so many blind dates, I should get a free dog!!
 smiledatyou
Joined: 10/19/2007
Msg: 18
Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/19/2008 8:40:29 PM
A young lady cames home from a date, rather sad. She told her mother, "Anthony proposed to me an hour ago." "Then why are you so sad?" her mother asked. "Because he also told me he is an atheist. Mom, he doesn't even believe there's a Hell." Her mother replied, "Marry him anyway. Between the two of us, we'll show him how wrong he is
 LeoRejean
Joined: 9/14/2006
Msg: 19
Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/20/2008 1:21:50 AM
lol @ smiledatyou's comment just gold there:)

and diva, im neither, until told otherwise:)
 easyguy71
Joined: 8/4/2006
Msg: 20
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Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/20/2008 12:48:23 PM
Smiledatyou, Cute. Gonna share that one with the wife.

I forgot the old expression from a lady boss of mine. "I like my coffee like I like my men: Strong, bold, and black, and on the kitchen table!"
 Tessav
Joined: 2/6/2008
Msg: 21
Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/20/2008 4:27:50 PM
^^^ I like my men like I like my coffee, hot, strong, sweet, and keeping me awake all night!
 ~*GEM*~
Joined: 5/6/2008
Msg: 22
Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/20/2008 7:39:43 PM
Sex and golf are the two things you can enjoy even if you're not good at them."
 sock1013
Joined: 2/14/2008
Msg: 23
Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/20/2008 8:20:54 PM
"Actually a woman is more like a beer, they look good, they taste good and you would step over your own mother just to get one!"

-Homer Simpson
 ~*GEM*~
Joined: 5/6/2008
Msg: 24
Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/20/2008 9:00:22 PM
Sex is one of the most wholesome, beautiful and natural experiences that money can buy - Steve Martin
 thb672
Joined: 6/15/2008
Msg: 25
Funny Analogies Pertaining to Dating, Relationships or Sex - Add to the List !
Posted: 8/21/2008 5:45:50 AM
For the ladies:

A man is like a new floor, if you lay him right, you can walk all over him for 20 years - Grace under fire.

Tom
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