| Does Sex Change the Relationship?
Posted: 10/1/2008 10:54:28 AM | In the movie, "When Harry Met Sally," Harry and Sally were the best of friends until they slept together. I still remember the scene afterwards. Sally had a big, satisfied grin on her face and, putting my own spin on it, seemed relieved she had finally found her guy. Now she could relax and enjoy life. On the other hand, Harry had the look of terror, as if he had just made the biggest mistake of his life.
I think sex changes the relationship, and not always for the good. I'd love to hear your personal stories or opinions on this subject. | |
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| Does Sex Change the Relationship?
Posted: 10/1/2008 11:02:26 AM | | It does depend on the person I believe but in general I believe it does affect the relationship mostly in a negative way...depending especially on how long you wait before actually having sex...and how open and honest each of you are ...the factors go on and on I guess...but, I have seen that sex almost always changes it for the worst...even though most men claim to WANT sex....if you give in 'too early' they will subconciously if not conciously think of you as easy and never genuinely trust you...or ....if you 'wait too long' they will think you are being a tease or are not genuinely attracted to them...then again...on the flip side...do women think the same...pretty much yeah...I am just saying in general this is what most people I have encountered think...I think...bseides if you look at tyhe deeper issues....getting to know someone sometimes is EXTREMELY important...and once their is a physical aspect to the relationship...all that goes out the door...its alot harder to leave a physical relationship when it is unhealthy than if there has been no physical contact. | |
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| Does Sex Change the Relationship?
Posted: 10/1/2008 11:16:57 AM | Well from the guys point of view after sex he knows she will now stay and cares. At this point most guys think okay how seriously do I want to get involved now that she is mine(assuming she is not a ho). If the guy waited 6 months then he probably will. If he waited 6 hours then he probably won't.
The girl is worried about what his decision will be after sex. Being super clingy not good idea and normal reaction since the girl is worried.
Note if guy is deadbeat he alway worries. I am no deadbeat so thats an opinion. I don't date hos so not sure how they react. | |
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| Does Sex Change the Relationship?
Posted: 10/1/2008 11:19:00 AM | yes sex does change the relatioship how about mine i have been married for thirty years and all of a sudden NO SEX she has decided no sex for him and many months later  i go had enough no kissing no emotions no nothing i tried to love her only thing i got was rejection. | |
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| Does Sex Change the Relationship?
Posted: 10/1/2008 11:19:44 AM | Of course it changes things... I've not found it to be in a negative way at all.
Men feel closer after sex just like we do.
assuming, of course, there is already some kind of relationship brewing and not some guy you just met. | |
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| Does Sex Change the Relationship?
Posted: 10/1/2008 11:28:25 AM | It's funny I'm not a fan of chick flicks at all, but that was one of my favs...and being the woman with a male brain that I am, I totally understood Harry's facial expression. It meant that now he had to categorize everything, and the relationship could no longer be an in the moment, fun, friendship type thing because she'd get all "female" on him, analyze everything and want to know what his intentions were, where before they could just, "be".
I think it only changes things in a bad way if it's undefined to begin with and there was no communication...in those cases both usually have two totally different ideas about what it means after the fact.
In a case where you both know where you stand, know each other well and what you want, it can only enhance things. | |
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| Does Sex Change the Relationship?
Posted: 10/1/2008 12:19:24 PM | Yes. Sex changes everything. I'd say it solidifies it - one way or the other. I've spent the better part of my life downplaying the role of sex in my relationships - only to FINALLY have a great sexual relationship and realize what I've been missing!
Oh - as for guys, and I'm just paraphrasing - but I was reading an excerpt from one of those relationship books where some guy 'demystifies' the male mind. . . he said something that made a lot of sense to me, he said: 'men express love with sex' and not to be surprised if a guy is feeling particularly loving, he'll want to have sex - And that when a woman rejects a man for sex (for whatever reason) he feels she's rejected his love.
I believe this to be the case of men in a loving relationship, not guys trying to score - but I can see it. I've always thought alot like men, and I can certainly relate.  | |
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| Does Sex Change the Relationship?
Posted: 10/1/2008 1:57:01 PM | | Of course """Sex changes a union as the chase is always more fun """but if it is taken by the proper steps "" Slow Dance of Love """ It takes it to a higher lever of communicational skill and the heaven and the world opens up into """ spirtual."""" called""" oneness ."""{Two halves making a whole} | |
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| Does Sex Change the Relationship?
Posted: 10/2/2008 7:00:30 PM | | OK after rereading mypost I think it sounded a lil off...lol I didnt mean sex was ALWAYS a negative thing...not at all...just that it could be a negative thing if they had not waited long enough and genuinely gotten to know eachothers true personalities... | |
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| Does Sex Change the Relationship?
Posted: 10/2/2008 9:13:53 PM | sex changes relationships the way sprinkles change an ice cream cone.
with or without either can still be a good thing.
dave | |
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