Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Guy  > "Treating a woman right" - what does that mean?      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Oriole
Joined: 6/30/2007
Msg: 1
"Treating a woman right" - what does that mean?Page 1 of 1    
I've done a tread search and I can find stuff about treating a woman "like a lady", "like a queen", "like a princess", or even treating a woman badly, but I can't seem to find what it's supposed to mean to "treat a woman right" and how it's different from treating another human being right. Can you guys shed some light?

Thanks.
 melkiorr
Joined: 12/30/2007
Msg: 2
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/15/2008 12:42:40 PM
difference is she want to be treat the way SHE want or as her wish... as opposed to treating another human being right as equal..
 Confidently Goofy
Joined: 10/11/2008
Msg: 3
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/15/2008 1:28:11 PM
To me, treating a woman right is treating them as an individual rather than as one of a certain sex, and treating them how you'd expect to be treated.

It's not about opening doors, paying for everything, and all that stuff. It's about understanding who they are regardless of sex, understanding their strengths and weaknesses, and treating them accordingly. If I know a woman is bad at something that I'm great at, I'll offer to help. If I know she's great at something that I'm bad at, I won't. Then again, I do this for guys too.

As an example, if I was dating a woman who's great with cars but sucks at cooking, and I know I'm horrible with cars but a great cook -- I'm fine with her working on the car while I make food. Let everyone play to their strengths, regardless of whether they're traditionally "male" or "female".

Treat people according to who they are, not what they are. There's really no one size fits all answer.
 druminky
Joined: 4/9/2008
Msg: 4
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/15/2008 1:39:23 PM
I think a lot of women are under the impression that "treating a woman right" is a set of behaviors that are universal, and that nearly all women would agree with them that "this is how you treat a woman." Even you, a female, are not up on this. Think about how many men are confused by this.
When men watch movies and TV, and occasionally listen in on woman-to-woman conversations, we hear this term used when the woman is describing what she liked about being in a relationship with a guy. it usually goes something like this: "Well, he was just nice, and fun to be around, and handsome.....and he knew how to treat a woman right!"
Rarely does the female friend who is listening say, "How did he treat you right?" That's because "treating a woman right" is code for "he did what I expected him to, and often didn't do the things I didn't want him to do."
It could mean:
-Gentlemanly things, like opening doors, pulling out chairs, getting up when a woman enters the room.
-Carrying heavy things for her, or doing dirty jobs, such as changing tires or killing bugs.
-Buying dinner and expecting nothing in return.
-Not gawking at or flirting with other women.
-Polite behavior
-Expensive gifts
-Taking care of her when she needed it, which can mean any of millions of things.
 Kolpadet
Joined: 7/23/2008
Msg: 5
view profile
History
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/15/2008 1:54:20 PM
I could have written my entire profile on this subject.

To summarize my thoughts on treating women right or "correctly," I must first discuss that treating a woman correctly is no different than treating a man correctly, with the exceptions of some anatomical and geometrical differences. I hope that someday we can drop the gender-loaded descriptions of what treating somebody well consists.

For some women, such as the ones you are alluding to in your question, the idea of being treated "correctly" means being treated as something they are not: queens; princesses; dominant forces in a relationship; in short, rulers. Women are human creatures just like we men are, and they deserve the same treatment.

The sort of thinking that women appeal to when they demand to be treated like a queen is somewhat hilarious, since it stems from very sexist times in woman's rights. It is the sort of thinking that is a bi-product of centuries of sexist attitudes concerning the role women play in our society. Here's something to think about... other than a queen, or a lady, or a duchess, or an empress, or any woman of extremely high social status, were women in most "civilized" societies even granted the ability to vote for most of human history? Nope. Now, taken into the context of TODAY'S society, where women are still treated unfairly, are paid less to do the same work, and etc, do such views of treating women like rulers have a time and place? In a way, they do. In a way, they do not.

For some men who have no clue how to treat women, they need to treat them like superiors. There are men who believe that women are to be subjugated, and that women should earn less than men for the same work, and that women are intellectually inferior, and that women are somehow demure creatures. Those types of men are ubiquitous. Women should not mate with men who believe that women are inherently inferior... that way they don't produce ignorant offspring... and then those offspring won't try to get into bar fights with me at redneck dives while I'm drinking my beer.

For those of us men who completely adore the women in our lives, treating our women like queens doesn't apply. We treat women as what women really are.

What women *are*, in my opinion, are equals. End of story. The people with whom I choose to surround myself are my intellectual and physical equals, and I treat them with the respect they have earned. Yes, respect is to be earned, not given lightly. Women are neither inferior or superior to men as human beings.

How treating another human being correctly or right is no different than treating a woman correctly. My friends are my equals, and I treat them very well. In order for anyone to be intimate in my life, he or she has to be a friend first. If a woman waltzed into my life expecting to be treated better than my family and friends, she would meet with some harsh realities.

Yes, sometimes women want to be treated too well - they desire to be immediately respected and treated significantly better than friends/family. Some of that stems from an inferiority complex and some of it stems from a deeply-rooted, societal-driven, defense mechanism.

In some contexts, women are completely JUSTIFIED in wanting to be treated like queens... but what they mean is "I want to be treated like a Queen compared to the way you treat everybody ELSE in your life... since you treat them like *!&*" Once again, some men have no idea how to treat the people in their lives well, so women have developed a natural defense mechanism to deal with those types of situations.

With that, I'm going to grab a beer and treat women as my intellectual equals while I discuss the concept of "existenz" (yes, with a "z,") with some friends down at the local bar.

Your friendly, neighborhood physicist,
--K
 Ralleac
Joined: 5/17/2008
Msg: 6
view profile
History
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/15/2008 2:08:12 PM
Can you guys shed some light?


Imagine an old school southern cotillion. Pulling out chairs, standing when they enter a room, throwing your coat over puddles, formal dancing, and generally acting like a willing servant to a certain extent. My parents actually made me go to one in my early teens for half a year. I don't really agree with that line of thinking, but those are some extremes that people are describing when they say they'll treat a woman "like a lady/queen/princess."

I think there is an appropriate middle ground where men and women can both have good manners towards one another. Treating a woman right starts out with respect and manners in general. It shouldn't be any different than we treat any other human being.
 edd_p
Joined: 3/30/2008
Msg: 7
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/15/2008 2:20:54 PM
I don't understand it either. Everyone should be treated slightly differently because everyone is slightly different, but the basic way you should treat people in my opinion should be the same. Hopefully that's in the way you'd like to be treated, unless for some weird reason you don't like being treated in what most would consider a nice way.
 coruja
Joined: 7/17/2006
Msg: 8
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/15/2008 2:26:48 PM
Only the people who use this term know what they mean by it - how others percieve it is another question.

From a woman, on her profile, I generally 'decode' it as meaning that she's an 'old fashioned' type who's affections are easily bought, and for which one would be expected to keep paying, in one way or another...
 Thunderstorms62
Joined: 12/11/2004
Msg: 9
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/15/2008 2:33:34 PM
If a woman comes and rings my doorbell on Halloween night dressed in a costume......
and I drop a Snickers bar into her bag.......I feel that I've treated her right.
If she leaves burning dog feces on my porch because she wanted a Milky Way instead...
she has not treated me right. Is that what you're looking for?
 druminky
Joined: 4/9/2008
Msg: 10
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/15/2008 2:36:56 PM

If a woman comes and rings my doorbell on Halloween night dressed in a costume......
and I drop a Snickers bar into her bag.......I feel that I've treated her right.
If she leaves burning dog feces on my porch because she wanted a Milky Way instead...
she has not treated me right. Is that what you're looking for?


This man speaketh the truth. Give him thy rod and thy staff and follow him.



 Stray__Cat
Joined: 7/12/2006
Msg: 11
view profile
History
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/15/2008 4:05:01 PM
It's a Redneck/Trailerpark phrase.
It means the guy won't slap you on the ass when he orders you to get him a beer.

Hope that clarifies things.
 Oriole
Joined: 6/30/2007
Msg: 12
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/15/2008 5:37:50 PM
Thanks for the replies, guys. I thought I was missing an important concept, but apparently I'm not. :)
 nodorks
Joined: 7/6/2008
Msg: 13
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/15/2008 5:45:40 PM

This man speaketh the truth. Give him thy rod and thy staff and follow him.
uh... shouldn't he come equipped with his own 'rod'?
 corindan
Joined: 7/13/2008
Msg: 14
view profile
History
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/15/2008 6:25:17 PM
To treat a woman right: be respectful, behave as if she were special, and-if you get between her legs-eat her p***y for an hour before you do anything else.
 Louis Vuitton
Joined: 8/24/2008
Msg: 15
view profile
History
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/15/2008 7:33:22 PM
Saying "please" instead of "yo bitch" when asking her to get beer from the fridge when the game is on.
 KiteGuy321
Joined: 3/21/2006
Msg: 16
view profile
History
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/15/2008 9:09:26 PM
Wow... if a woman doesn't know what it means, how the heck are men expected to know?

We can all come up with "gentlemanly" things like holding the door open, and pulling out a chair... we can also come up with things like leaving little notes that show we care.. blah blah blah..

When someone uses the phrase "Knows how to treat a woman right" it really means, "Doesn't treat me like that last a$$hole I was with."
 AndrewTS
Joined: 9/11/2008
Msg: 17
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/16/2008 12:49:43 AM
Many would define the "right" treatment for a lady as the "correct", "befitting", "commensurate with her ladiness (and NOT ladyship)" and maybe "not bad".

According to my interpretation treating a lady right means treating a lady not left, or treating a lady not wrong. Wrong treatment may include, but would not be restricted to, left hooks and right jabs. Left treatment of a lady would include wrong left turns and left-over leftovers.

Treating her right would mean handing her a bouquet of flowers. Treating her wrong would mean leaving a bucket of burning shit on her front portch. Treating her right would mean putting ointment on her right arm. Treating her left would mean massaging her left thigh.

Of all the things I said above, I liked the last sentence the most. It was right in there, titillating me, and tickling my French fantasy.
 Marina3515
Joined: 2/22/2007
Msg: 18
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/16/2008 12:56:34 AM
I'm confused by this statement as well. First off it's not something you should have to state. It's like saying treat people with respect.... no really thanks for the tip. Also being treated right is different for each individual.

When I read this I feel they are letting me know that their past relationships didn't workout and darn it they won't let that happen again. Either way they are brining baggage from a prev relationship, instead of clearing the slate and giving the new person the benefit of the doubt that he will do right by her.
 WanderingRain
Joined: 3/9/2008
Msg: 19
view profile
History
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/16/2008 1:00:23 AM
If they apply the golden rule, that's all you need to see.
 sanddallor
Joined: 8/30/2008
Msg: 20
view profile
History
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/16/2008 8:36:00 AM
That means different things to different people, but basically I think it means to treat her with respect and dignity. Beyond that it means leaning the individual things she likes and showing her that attention.
 bk0x45
Joined: 1/4/2006
Msg: 21
view profile
History
Treating a woman right - what does that mean?
Posted: 10/16/2008 8:40:27 AM
OP: It really varies by the individual using the term. It could mean treating her as an equal, it could mean practicing chivalry, it could mean being a doormat. It is a meaningless term, because it covers such a wide range.
Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Guy  > "Treating a woman right" - what does that mean?