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 italianice310
Joined: 10/23/2008
Msg: 1
Why do guys make inappropriate comments?Page 1 of 1    
I am getting sexually related questions/comments in the initial conversation stages. I think this is inappropriate and when i say something i hear that i am uptight or prudish. not the case but i dont think asking what size my chest is should be asked in the first conversation. I have no provacative pics or does my profile say anything suggestive. So i am wondering why guys do this and how to handle it?
 John517
Joined: 1/3/2009
Msg: 2
Why do guys make inappropriate comments?
Posted: 1/9/2009 3:12:35 PM
The guys who are asking are Cads with absolutely no social graces.

How to handle Block, Delete, .... Next
 HamB0ne
Joined: 12/21/2008
Msg: 3
Why do guys make inappropriate comments?
Posted: 1/9/2009 3:12:45 PM
I think you should say something, like you've been doing. If they can't respect that, block them. Not every guy is going to act this way.
 SingleGuy4912
Joined: 7/25/2006
Msg: 4
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Why do guys make inappropriate comments?
Posted: 1/9/2009 3:13:13 PM
Tell them you only talk to guys 14" or greater. Then block them.




 Thatguy67
Joined: 9/20/2006
Msg: 5
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Why do guys make inappropriate comments?
Posted: 1/9/2009 3:19:57 PM
Don't forget, your blocking tool is your friend. There's also an age filter on your profile if that is an issue but from what I understand such messages come from all ages.

If you get a message the first time, just block them. Responding to them is giving them the attention that they crave.
 Mr. Blblblbl
Joined: 12/31/2008
Msg: 6
Why do guys make inappropriate comments?
Posted: 1/9/2009 3:20:28 PM
Because if all a guy is looking for is to get laid, the sooner he figures out who's down with that and who isn't, the quicker he can find what he wants. How do you handle it? However you want.
 ForumStorm08
Joined: 12/10/2008
Msg: 7
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Why do guys make inappropriate comments?
Posted: 1/9/2009 3:23:00 PM
There are all sorts of fish in the pond here lass. There are some bozos out there that
probably have the probability and statistics figured out with this type of approach.
They probably also get excited when you react negatively (such as this thread)
versus you simply using that "block user" tab. Last I heard, that shuts them up
every time.
 canoist
Joined: 8/4/2007
Msg: 8
Why do guys make inappropriate comments?
Posted: 1/9/2009 3:50:32 PM
You say you "think this is inappropriate" but please realize that sex makes the world go round. Wars have been fought for sex (the Trojan war) Presidents impeached for it (Clinton) and other leaders (Genghis Khan) embraced for it.

The sexual urge drives both men and women for most of their lives. This is ESPECIALLY true in dating. One of the reasons people date is for sex.

My point is that sexual comments are appropriate in the venue of an online dating website. They are not appropriate in other places, such as at your place of work, but on a dating site it it totally appropriate and should be expected. Perhaps even welcomed.

My advice is to change your attitude. You came her of your own free will. You are interacting with others who came her of their own free will. You can leave or block, but I don't think that would serve yours or anyone's needs.
 James Bottomtooth III
Joined: 5/19/2008
Msg: 9
Why do guys make inappropriate comments?
Posted: 1/9/2009 4:01:44 PM

... So i am wondering why guys do this...

Because there are some women that are into that, same reason there is spam, only takes one person to make it worth while.


...How to handle it....

With both hands and some oil.
 HJA
Joined: 4/16/2008
Msg: 10
Why do guys make inappropriate comments?
Posted: 1/9/2009 4:06:55 PM
Clinton wasn't impeached for it. He was impeached for lying under oath.
 I Cornelius
Joined: 1/4/2009
Msg: 11
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Why do guys make inappropriate comments?
Posted: 1/9/2009 4:15:14 PM
Canoist sent you the comments, didn't he?

It's caveman-like behavior. Unfortunately, even though this is simply a dating site, many can't draw the line between that and an "adult" site (especially since this is a FREE site and it's no cost to them to act like apes...). All they see is "pretty girl," "online photo" and the mental connection is made. Besides, this IS the internet and all it's used for is porn anyway... at least in their pervy minds it is.

Sure, when aiming the pervy dart on a free board such as this, they might indeed hit a few who respond the way they hope, but all it takes is a few seconds to read a profile to understand why a person is here. If a guy ignores that, he's a moron.
 FrozenAssets
Joined: 11/25/2007
Msg: 12
Why do guys make inappropriate comments?
Posted: 1/9/2009 4:51:59 PM
Clinton was never impeached. "they" tried to impeached him, it never took.

Anyone that sends a crude (sexual)comment unbided is a lout and a loser, and BTW it is never appropriate to send such a comment to someone one does not know. This is not a site for such low brow behaviour, you Canoist, must have this site mixed up with those 'Adult' sites.

and the answer is the 'Delete' button

 James Bottomtooth III
Joined: 5/19/2008
Msg: 13
Why do guys make inappropriate comments?
Posted: 1/9/2009 4:54:28 PM

...Clinton was never impeached. "they" tried to impeached him, it never took...


Was impeached, but then acquitted.

Bill Clinton, President of the United States was impeached by the House of Representatives on December 19, 1998, and acquitted by the Senate on February 12, 1999.

So I can only assume that to be impeached means just to be charged not convicted.
 WackMC
Joined: 4/23/2008
Msg: 14
Why do guys make inappropriate comments?
Posted: 1/9/2009 5:23:47 PM

I think this is inappropriate and when i say something i hear that i am uptight or prudish.


I agree with the guy who says sexual comments are appropriate in a dating context. The big issue seems to be WHEN it's ok to make them.

OP, you are INDEED uptight about this issue. Enough so to start a ranting post about it and try to get people to tell you something to soothe your nerves. That is the very definition of UPTIGHT. The mere mention of sex on a dating site puts you in a tizzy.

Are you prudish? Dunno. But uptight? You becha.
 italianice310
Joined: 10/23/2008
Msg: 15
Why do guys make inappropriate comments?
Posted: 1/9/2009 5:31:06 PM
Listen, i get it. I am not saying this should never come up, I am saying initially, in this new technical way of dating, timing is everything. If we are dating, great, bring it,but there should be some "courting" period, no?
 OldFashndMntMan
Joined: 6/20/2006
Msg: 16
Why do guys make inappropriate comments?
Posted: 1/9/2009 6:30:15 PM

Listen, i get it. I am not saying this should never come up, I am saying initially, in this new technical way of dating, timing is everything. If we are dating, great, bring it,but there should be some "courting" period, no?


Well OP, it depends what you mean by "courting period". For the sake of discussion I am going to assume you are meaning the second or third date.

There are MANY variables concerning this 'issue'.

My main point is going to be distance. If you live across town from the guy, okay, it is not as necessary to discuss this up front, there is very little if anything invested.

On the other hand, if we are talking about a long distance date? I want to know this UP FRONT before I spend 4-6 hours driving time, and 50.00 for gas round trip only to find out you are 'inhibited'.

So you see, there really is no cut and dried answer to your question, it all boils down to what YOU are comfortable with.

Best wishes

OFMM
 rickneedscoffee
Joined: 12/15/2008
Msg: 17
Why do guys make inappropriate comments?
Posted: 1/9/2009 6:36:38 PM

Why do guys make inappropriate comments?


Because those guys think with the wrong head and can't keep their testosterone in check.


So i am wondering why guys do this and how to handle it?


Keep searching for a real man.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 18
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Why do guys make inappropriate comments?
Posted: 1/9/2009 6:46:31 PM
You're right, OP, your profile doesn't suggest you prefer this behavior. It does seem to have an air of, "this is the behavior I've had in the past and don't like", but I don't know if that really triggers some subconscious reaction in the type of men who come on so strong in the initial meeting stages.

So, if we can't find the prevention, we can at least do the cure. And that is? Dump 'em. Explain why, as you have. And yes, they'll accuse you. So what. You know what they are, and what you are. And hopefully, you stuck out in their mind enough, they won't be bothering you with what you don't want, anytime in the future.

sorry you keep hitting the idiots, better luck with
 SilentWhisperz
Joined: 1/2/2009
Msg: 19
Why do guys make inappropriate comments?
Posted: 1/9/2009 7:14:42 PM
This answer below is too funny. And the most appropriate answer and action, in my opinion.
SilentWhisperz/Jess


Posted: 1/9/2009 313 PM
Tell them you only talk to guys 14" or greater. Then block them.
 caesar2011
Joined: 5/5/2008
Msg: 20
Why do guys make inappropriate comments?
Posted: 1/9/2009 7:18:05 PM
We don't know how to effectively show our interest.
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