| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 9:19:19 AM | | A guy got engaged to a girl. The guy is 30 and the girl is 26. The guy just found out that the girl slept with 83 people. Now this guy is thinking twice about marrying this girl. What should he do? | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 9:27:31 AM | Make sure she gets tested every few months for the next year or so.
Then forget about the number of people. As long as she is not constantly cheating.
However, that's like 0.7 guys a month over the last 10 years.
That does seem like she was just bangin' away huh?
Or she's lying. Shrug. | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 9:31:25 AM | | Now he is thinking he might be just another number. | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 9:36:54 AM |
Now he is thinking he might be just another number.
Well, all "he" has to do is ask himself, how would he feel about a partner if she was his "83rd" sex partner...
It does seem to me that she doesn't place any value on sex or who she does it with.
So she's either very casual about sex, or very easily persuaded.... | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 9:42:15 AM | The girl thought she would come clean and tell her man everything so there are no secrets. They were both telling each other there skeletons and he was just uncomfortable with her sleeping with that many guys. A few other guys made a comment that after 83 guys she would be big enough to park a truck in it. I'm like. OMG. you didn't just say that. I don't know what to tell the guy. In his mind, he doesn't really want to marry a slut and he is thinking maybe after a while, she will get sick of him just like those other 83 guys.
I really don't know what is going thru her head. | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 9:49:45 AM | this right here is why women lie about how many men they slept with... I assume he loves her and that they have been together for more than a few days... he needs to get over it.... her past is just that... her past... it is what made her who she is.... she can't change it....
if he is calling her a slut to his friends... they need to break up.. she deserves better than a man who would talk shit about her....
damn shame.... thought love was unconditional..... | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 9:57:00 AM | Oh Yea... Do YOU women want to marry a SLUT? I doubt it.
I would tell her that I have never wanted to marry a slut and I'm not going to change my standards for her.
Unconditional Love??
Women will get mad at anything and cheat in a heart beat...
How's that unconditional love?
Leave it to a woman that has slept with too many to tell us men how we should feel about sluts. | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 9:58:30 AM | A man sleeps with 83 women and he is a stud. A woman sleeps with 83 men and she is a slut. Jeeze what a double standard. I am sure your friends was no innocent little virgin and had quite a number of kinky meaningless encounters.
So long as she is not behaving that way now then what does it matter. Maybe she really regrets her past? Maybe she was sowing her wild oats?
A few other guys made a comment that after 83 guys she would be big enough to park a truck in it
You can deliver a baby and your vagina will go back to what it was before. I don't see what how many men she was with has to do anything. Obviously your not so intelligent friend has never heard of kegel exercises. | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 10:01:21 AM | There is always a condition of love..
As long as you don't beat me
As long as you don't cheat
As long as you treat my kids well
As long as __________ fill in the blank
I wish it were as simple as that. | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 10:02:29 AM | excuse me Nebula??? are you referring to me??? you know NOTHING about me to make a statement as to why I responded the way I did...
yea... go right a head and tell her you won't marry a slut.... see how far that gets you.... being mean in life never gets you far....
damn.... again.... this is why honesty has gone out the window..... we know nothing about this girl.... or why she has done what she has or how long ago it was....
to wnight.... your "friend" doesn't love her if he is saying this shit.... he needs to move on and let her find someone who loves her.....
unless he is beating her now.... cheating now.... any of the things you men listed as to an unconditional love rebuttal.... I am not sure why we are talking about them... I am guesing her 83 men are in the PAST..... not the present.... | |
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wynd1
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Joined: 11/25/2005
Msg: 11 | |
| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 10:07:58 AM | | ask what she did with the money! She might prove to be a very wise investor. | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 10:10:05 AM | He is torn. I'm sure he is thinking of a lot of things you guys mentioned.
He really thinks she very cute and wants to stay with her but when he is doing her, he can not get those other guys out of his head.
Shouldn't you be able to not hide things from you soon to be husband or is it ok that some things are left unsaid? | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 10:19:48 AM | | While that is a lot of people for a man or a woman her age, by telling his friends, he's broken any sacred bond of intimacy he had with this woman. I'm positive that things she shares with him in private she'd never expect him to be sharing with his buddies. What was he thinking? She should dump his a$$ - he's an idiot and not trustworthy, honorable or a man of integrity, period. | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 10:26:42 AM | First of all so what about the number of guys she slept with its the past, as long as she doesnt have any diseases the past is the past, what is the guy's past is so pure he can comment on that? puleaseeeeeeeeeeeee give your head a shake. He's a idiot.
I assumed she told him about her past, that was a dumb on her part, if they are going to get married I would assume they would get tested? no.
For the guy to assume that she's pure like a virgin, well he's delusional, and those that think that oh she's a slut for sleeping with that many guys is also living in La La land, Ive read about virgins picking up a disease after their first experience , all it takes is one bad sexual experience just ONE.
What should he do? go take a sex education course instead of watching American Idol. | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 10:26:51 AM | | Well if something like that is going to shake this guy than what type of relationship did he have with this girl anyway. Marriage isn't easy and there are going to be things that require endurance and not someone sprinting away as soon as someone's past is brought up. | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 10:26:55 AM | Every woman out ther says that she wants an honest man , but very few are willing to be an honest woman..
Yea,,, As that woman said,, honesty has gone out the window.
She said that this is why women LIE.
I have been with fewer than 10 during my entire life and I'm 55.
I got married when I was 18 and was faithful to my wife who cheated on me several times ..
Women will cheat even if they have no reason to cheat..
My ex-wife has finaly learned how NOT to lie but she didn't learn that until after she had destroyed our marriage, TWICE,....
This man needs to ask her how many times she cheated on someone else..
The answer to this question should be very revealing if she is giving an honest answer.
I would tell this guy to keep looking for someone that isn't going to bed with every Tom,D!ck and Harry. | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 10:27:54 AM | ^^trailgirl
Are YOU serious?
Women never tell their GFs stuff like that? 
PLEASE...Hey. Guys need to talk sometimes. And sometimes it has nothing to do with sports or cars. | |
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| He should let it go.
Posted: 1/12/2009 10:38:52 AM | That was then, this is now.
IMO people shouldn't ask or tell one another their "number"; I have never heard of a single instance of it being productive or positive in any way. | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 10:39:37 AM | It wouldn't make any difference to me in the OP's context.
As long as there aren't any that are after we were exclusive, who cares.
People change, things happen.
I can't imagine sleeping with that many people, but what difference does that make?
Nobody is perfect. | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 10:42:06 AM | I think that if this discussion was necessary then it should have taken place before the proposal.
I had a guy friend in a similar situation. A week before the wedding and his fiance decided to confess to him about her sexual past. They were both 23 or 24. His number was 3, including her. Her number was 48, including him.
After seeing what he went through I will never again make sweeping generalizations about men who are torn by such.
He couldn't sleep, he couldn't eat and on top of the stress of getting married he had to come to terms with the girl he thought he knew and the girl he had no idea about. He wasn't judging her on her past.. but her present and in her need to confess it to him and have the expectation that it wouldn't change anything. Why wouldn't it? She had presented herself one way which led to him falling in love with her.. then once that was solid she presented herself in a completely different light. He then had to wonder what would happen a year into the marriage. Not if she would cheat on him.. but what else he didn't know about her that she had presented one way but might actually be much different.
He also went from this guy who was confident in a relationship knowing he was loved and had the ability to please his partner to one was suddenly insecure. She had so much more experience.. What if she was lying about or faking her pleasure? What if she was settling for him? What if...
Don't get me wrong, she didn't ever lie about how many she had been with.. it was just never a topic of conversation. He never really thought about her past experiences and it just wasn't relevant until she made it so.
I would give your friend the same advice I gave mine. If you have any doubt whatsoever then hold off. Don't get married unless you are positive that you know who you are getting married to and that you do want a future with them and can accept the good, bad and the ugly.
They ended up getting married because in the end, he really did love her. However! They were divorced 5 years later. Haha, guess what? She cheated on him.
Shouldn't you be able to not hide things from you soon to be husband or is it ok that some things are left unsaid?
Yes and no. It's not always the what that is being said, it is the why that is important. Did she tell him because she was ashamed and guilty with the hope that their love could absolve her past or did she tell him because he asked and she was just being honest? | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 10:42:57 AM | True. No one is perfect.
BUT I'd have a real hard time believing that if you slept with that many people that you never once cheated during a relationship. There almost has to be some overlap somewhere.
Then it's not just how many, but how trustworthy. | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 10:43:25 AM | | And this is why women should NEVER tell their numbers! | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 10:45:02 AM | Man, 83 people. My 0 vs this woman's 83 makes me feel sad.
:o( | |
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 10:47:50 AM | Yea,, they should never tell their numbers because far too many of them are sluts..
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| Slept with 83 people
Posted: 1/12/2009 10:55:26 AM | When I married my ex husband I was well aware of the fact that he had slept with LOTS of women. I am not sure of the exact amount, for he always claimed he had lost track after fifty. But I knew the fact that he was in a popular band led to his sexual escapades.
But, I never ever doubted his love for me. I knew when we talked, when he looked at me, when we made love that it was ME he wanted to be with.
If you have to question the validity of her feelings for you, or have doubts because she has had lots of partners, then do HER a favor and let her go.
Frankly, she does not need a doubting Thomas in her life. | |
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