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Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Guy  > What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?      Home login  
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 Angelaisahippy
Joined: 1/9/2009
Msg: 1
What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?Page 1 of 1    
I met someone and went on about three dates. The last being New Years Eve. We had a great night ending with a long kiss. Then instead of calling me he texts me for four or five days. This is a 38 year old man I'm talking about. So I texted him that I don't really like texting and if he wants to talk to me he needs to call me. I'm 33, not 12. Then he waits two more days and calls me and yesterday he called. I avoided both calls. By the time he called the first time I decided that he probably had someone with him that he did not want to know he was talking to me and that he was dishonest. When a grown man chooses to text more than call, I usually figure he has a girl friend. Am I right in my assumption?
 ForumStorm08
Joined: 12/10/2008
Msg: 2
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What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?
Posted: 1/13/2009 6:57:16 AM
OP, I don't like the whole texting thing either because it's easy for context to be
misinterpreted. Having said that...don't you think that you might be jumping the
gun here a little with your assumption? (Actually it's more of a leap)
Deliberately avoiding his phone call could be labeled as childish by some and play-
ing jedi mind games by others.

Anyway...maybe you should list your dislike of texting on your profile?
There does seem to be a texting culture out there. Good Luck!!!
 Wildman46
Joined: 6/4/2008
Msg: 3
What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?
Posted: 1/13/2009 7:06:23 AM
Then he waits two days and calls me and yesterday he called. I avoided boths calls. By the time he called the first time I decided that he probably had someone with him that he did not want to know he was talking to me and that was dishonest.


Are you sure you're not 12, because you sure are acting like a 12 year old. You ask the guy to call, then when he does you avoid his calls because of your ASSUMPTIONS. Why don't you try this novel approach, Ask him about things that may be of concern to you, tell him of your concerns, if you don't like the answers you're getting then move on.

Keep in mind that the guy just went on a few dates with you, he owes you nothing, he can see and date pretty much who he wants, as can you. You two just went on a few date, you're not exclusive, stop acting like you're being cheated on.


Am I right in my assumptions


Nope! but he would be correct in thinking you might be coco for coco puffs.
 lostgirl71
Joined: 8/16/2008
Msg: 4
What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?
Posted: 1/13/2009 7:09:59 AM
Come on princess if you 33 and not 12 dont play hide and seek when he calls. If you avoid intentionally the calls you have no right to complain that he isnt calling enough.

Unless both your hands are broken and you do no have voice dial on your phone what is your excuse for not calling him? pick up the phone - call ...

Texting is easy and quick and allows us to know that someone is thinking of us at the time when other communication is not possible ..
 Jumbie564
Joined: 5/20/2008
Msg: 5
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What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?
Posted: 1/13/2009 7:15:22 AM
Let me get this straight. You tell him you'd rather talk than text. So he calls and you don't answer the phone?

Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, WTF?!

Me? I'd never call again (or text). However, if you decided to finally return my calls it better damn well come with a good explaination followed by an apology.

FWIW, when a "grown" man chooses to text more than he calls it might be for a lot of reasons - none of which have to do with him being dishonest. Some men don't like spending a lot of time on the phone. Some men, until they get to know a woman better, simply don't have a lot to say. Texting may simply be his way of letting you know he's thinking about you - even when he doesn't have a lot to say at the moment.
 aspiring_angel
Joined: 1/25/2006
Msg: 6
What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?
Posted: 1/13/2009 7:16:57 AM
Wow OP, good luck with that.
 GeneralizingNow
Joined: 10/10/2007
Msg: 7
What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?
Posted: 1/13/2009 7:17:43 AM
Did you tell him you prefer to speak on the phone rather than text? Then why did you avoid his calls? Now how come you're still upset because he wasn't what you wanted him to be right away? Do you think perfect men grow up that way, or is it learned behavior?

I think this is a pretty good example of the "games" people complain about.
 Black-widow-spider
Joined: 12/19/2008
Msg: 8
What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?
Posted: 1/13/2009 7:31:52 AM
It could mean a number of things. But it is too soon to start making judgements!
I DONT like texting and I prefer to phone and speak on the phone.
I have got into a lot of trouble with misinterpruted texts and lost ones close to me.
Texting is good if the other person is busy! Before a call text hey are you busy can we chat? They may even phone you if they are not busy.
Texting is mainly just for short pieces of information like notes and reminders.
eg yes I can make it tonite or no I cant make it tonite.
Stuff like that.......well that is what I have been told.........
 sum1uknow
Joined: 10/7/2008
Msg: 9
What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?
Posted: 1/13/2009 7:43:46 AM
All depends on situations. But , think of it this way ... you meet someone online (emails etc) texting is nothing more than a email over your phone . My 2 cents is why be so petty over .. " o he didn't call me , he texted me " There is so many other more important things to worry about .
 tommy35180
Joined: 5/27/2008
Msg: 10
What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?
Posted: 1/13/2009 7:45:57 AM
OLD AND ALONE.duckin phone calls,time to leave neverland wendy.
 Write Time
Joined: 12/29/2008
Msg: 11
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What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?
Posted: 1/13/2009 7:48:01 AM
I wouldn't leap to any conclusions. Texting is becoming the preferred communication mode to lots of people of all ages. I wouldn't read anything into it. Rather, I'd just ask: Hey, what's up? Why the change? Nothing to lose by being direct.
 Angelaisahippy
Joined: 1/9/2009
Msg: 12
What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?
Posted: 1/13/2009 8:01:29 AM
The reason I chose to not answer his call is because I changed my mind about him. I had this happen to me before and the guy had a girl friend. So, no it was no head game on my part. I just wanted to get a mans perspective is all. To me texting is like Black Widows post, for reminders and such, or just to let me or them know I'm thinking about them. His texts were different. He wanted to text back and forth like a conversation, like my 13 year old daughter does. Also, when he texted me I went ahead of called him and shortly after he sent me a text as if he had not even noticed I called. This happened twice. Phone rang several times before going to messages. I left a message both times. So, to me it felt like a head game. I don't play head games and am not interested in them.

I did not meet this man on here by the way, we met in person. This is a person that knew me for a while before asking me out.
 Angelaisahippy
Joined: 1/9/2009
Msg: 13
What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?
Posted: 1/13/2009 8:05:11 AM
and texting was not a normal way of communicating before.
 wishugoodluck
Joined: 2/12/2008
Msg: 14
What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?
Posted: 1/13/2009 8:05:47 AM
I feel some men they are better or feel more comfortable expressing themselves in writing than talking, probably that's why they prefer to text. Your guy accepted your suggestions and called you, he respects you so don't shut him out. From your end, you thought he waited two days until he called you, before you fully realized his schedule, don't jump into conclusion, he may have something he needs to do that distracted him, some people don't realize time flies when they are busy. The most important thing is he did called you, give him and yourself a chance, you guys had some good times before, put in more time to observe and understand him, don't push him away just because of this tiny little problem.
 *~*ChardyGirl*~*
Joined: 6/29/2007
Msg: 15
What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?
Posted: 1/13/2009 8:05:50 AM
Why are you avoiding his calls.....?
Texting is like what? Black widows post? WTF ??

Im really at a loss to understand why you think he was with someone else,just coz he took a couple of days to call you?

No wonder you haven't seen him since NYE if you're like this.....
 Wildman46
Joined: 6/4/2008
Msg: 16
What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?
Posted: 1/13/2009 8:06:48 AM

This is a person that knew me for awhile before asking me out


Then you would know if he was involved with someone else, right?.
 onikuja
Joined: 11/13/2008
Msg: 17
What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?
Posted: 1/13/2009 8:30:11 AM
Umm well, He probably wasnt with someone else but I cant say id blame him if he was now
 Angelaisahippy
Joined: 1/9/2009
Msg: 18
What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?
Posted: 1/13/2009 8:30:59 AM
Thanks for the nice post wish. I getting attacked a bit in here. I will take your advice and call him back. I was afraid that because of my past experiences, that it was all too familiar and I should read the signs. Not repeat my past mistakes ya know.
 Wildman46
Joined: 6/4/2008
Msg: 19
What does it mean when a man texts instead of calls?
Posted: 1/13/2009 8:32:49 AM
I will take your anvice and call him back.I was afraid because of my past experiences.


If the guy is smart, he will avoid your calls. In the future try giving everyone you date the benefit of the doubt, let then start with a clean slate, instead of putting crap from your past on them.

This poor guy did nothing to you, then why the hell should he be paying the bill for someone else that crapped on you in your past relationship.

If you can't get over your past relationships, don't date until you do. But to keep judging your current date by things from your past is just way too much drama. No guy in his right might wants to become involved with a drama queen.
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