| who recovers faster after a breakup men or women?
Posted: 1/13/2009 12:47:35 PM | Between what I have experienced and what I have heard and read it seems to me that after a breakup the woman tends to move on and start dating - even if just chat or coffee, before men do and that a larger percentage of men get really disturbed, threaten to hurt themselves or someone, end up drinking or depressed .
Opinions? | |
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| who recovers faster after a breakup men or women?
Posted: 1/13/2009 12:53:57 PM | i think it totally depends on the situation and the people involved
who has invested the most into the relationship often has something to do with how quickly they move on afterwards, i think... also, who was the most hurt/scarred by the experience
it also depends on whether the person feels comfortable being alone or if they feel they need to be with someone else to be happy, etc.
lots of variables | |
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| who recovers faster after a breakup men or women?
Posted: 1/13/2009 1:01:47 PM | OpInIoN ALeRT!!
I think who ever broke up the relationship is most likely to get over it first and move on.
Unless they immediately regret it and wanna take it back! Damn you voicemail break up, Damn you!! | |
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| who recovers faster after a breakup men or women?
Posted: 1/13/2009 1:02:23 PM | ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^...................................
I think that's due to the fact that men aren't always good at letting their emotions show.
Therefore.. they try to hide what they feel about a break-up far longer then women.
Also.. not many men cry on their friends shoulders while trying to watch the NFL or what have you.. do they?
Do they sit in a puddle that is now frozen salt.. once.. ice cream?
I don't think so. JMO though. | |
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| who recovers faster after a breakup men or women?
Posted: 1/13/2009 1:21:04 PM | | One of the factors, is who checked out of the relationship first. That person generally recovers quicker, as they have already started the "mourning" process. Of course, it really varies with individual personalities. | |
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| who recovers faster after a breakup men or women?
Posted: 1/13/2009 1:27:12 PM | We all have different upbringings and different life experiences that have led us to where we are. There are so many factors that go into a persons emotional profile that such a silly blanket "men or women" answer is futile.
Some people accept change in life quickly, some people need more time, some people wallow for far,far too long. It's whoever has the emotional equipment to do so. As with just about anything, there's no such thing as men vs women. | |
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| who recovers faster after a breakup men or women?
Posted: 1/13/2009 1:27:34 PM | | Totally depends on each individual person... Sometimes it depends on the situation too... Men do generally tend to 'hide' their feelings more than women but it doesn't mean that they don't hurt too... | |
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| who recovers faster after a breakup men or women?
Posted: 1/13/2009 1:30:37 PM | | I don't know how you could generalize it and get any kind of useful info. Not everyone's feelings are know, study samples are mostly useless, the fact is, it probably has nothing to do with gender and everything to do with each individual. | |
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| who recovers faster after a breakup men or women?
Posted: 1/13/2009 2:37:32 PM | I have not read the other replies but to put this down to gender seems incredibly foolish to me. I have seen both men and women absolutely gutted by break-ups.
Generally speaking... the one who is LEFT takes the longer to recover. The one who still was invested in the relationship takes the longer to recover simply because they have more to process. | |
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| who recovers faster after a breakup men or women?
Posted: 1/13/2009 2:43:22 PM | Of course it depends on the individual! Who was deeper into the relationship? Doesn't matter whether it's a man or woman. Essentialy we're all human beings. We have hearts, feelings etc. And, it gets more complex, for example, one party says "I can't handle this anymore, I'm outa here". Back on the dating sites, the other follows. Both parties are still hurting, BUT, they've listened to friends or family (dump em, delete em, don't answer the phone etc.)......usually the worst thing they can do!!! No closure, no reconciliation.......building relationships takes work, on both parties!!!
That's why we have Forums, to help individuals with unbiased help! Well, some of it is biased, because we've all had experiences. For instance, "Once a cheater always a cheater" NOT TRUE. In almost 40 yrs. I had one indiscretion, if you will! Would I do it again? NO! She died, and I can't say I'm sorry again. I know she was hurt, so I wouldn't put that kinda hurt on another person! "Once a liar always a liar" NOT TRUE! Suppose you smoke? But in your Profile it says "I don't smoke", simply because you're not getting any action! But on everyother aspect you're completely honest! A "Little white lie?" Maybe, but that doesn't make you a complete liar! I don't think so!
Do men cry? absolutely!!! I'm a man, comfortable in my skin, do I cry? absolutely! Why? because I'm human...just like you, I've got feelings, and a heart! I'm human, and I don't care who see's me cry.........why? Because I'm just like you, male/female ,who gives a Sh#t? I really don't care....do you? | |
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| who recovers faster after a breakup men or women?
Posted: 1/13/2009 2:44:06 PM | Men get over faster!!! No wait, it's women, they are the ones!! Six puppies. Wait, no, it's the puppies, with their tongue sticking out. No wait. It's the chipmunks. No, wait, I got it, it's the lawyers. They get over the day after they get your last check or your house.
I think there's no right answer to this one. It depends on the person, the relationship, who cheated, who wanted out and who didn't, who feels got the short end of the stick, or a stick at all. So rather than gender bash here, let's realize that we all get over in different ways and leave at that. | |
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| who recovers faster after a breakup men or women?
Posted: 1/13/2009 2:51:02 PM | | I find that myself and people I've known, that women take it hard right away, cry, lose weight, can't sleep...and men "repress" and hook up right away....THEN later it hits them, they feel lonely, also realize the grass isn't always greener etc...but also it really does have to do on who did the breaking up, that factor is first. p.s...I do agree with what I Cornelius said. | |
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bsg789
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Joined: 12/4/2007
Msg: 19 | |
| who recovers faster after a breakup men or women?
Posted: 1/13/2009 3:11:51 PM |
I think who ever broke up the relationship is most likely to get over it first and move on.
I think this is true in many cases. Although there can be some exceptions to this. Suppose I had broken up with a man because he cheated on me. I would think that it could take me longer to recover especially if I had felt our relationship was great. | |
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| who recovers faster after a breakup men or women?
Posted: 1/13/2009 3:39:54 PM | I feel that men and women feel the hurt on the same level, but in my experience, it seems that men internalize it more. Is it because women have more of a support system to discuss their feelings of hurt/disappointment/anger, in the form of gal pals ready with pints of Ben and Jerry's, and men view it as a sign of weakness to admit their suffering?
Women will typically cry, mope, and overanalyze every aspect of the failed relationship before deciding that they have "healed" enough to move on.
The men I've known typically "brush it off" publically while inwardly deciding either to forgo any future entanglements based on their bad experiences or quickly going on the rebound.
JMHO, of course, what do I know?  | |
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| who recovers faster after a breakup men or women?
Posted: 1/13/2009 3:41:58 PM | Here's the straight scoop and men, listen up.
It takes women much longer to end a bad relationship,
but - when a woman IS done?
She's stone cold done and NOT going back.
It takes men very little to end a relationship they feel is getting bad for them,
however they will continue to think about that woman for a much longer period of time than a woman would think about him.
There's statistical evidence to correlate what I've stated but it will take me a bit of research to find it.
For now?
Strictly speaking as my own experience and opinion
If I am done? I am beyond done. Stone cold done. | |
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| who recovers faster after a breakup men or women?
Posted: 1/13/2009 3:56:04 PM | however they [Men] will continue to think about that woman for a much longer period of time than a woman would think about him.
There's statistical evidence to correlate what I've stated but it will take me a bit of research to find it.
Agree. ^^^^
I read an article on this as well, and it is true. It has also has happened to me in real life from time to time.
It is (according to the article), tied to the fact that some men...or sometimes 'most' men don't usually have the support group that women seem to have...of friends and family....and, even if they do, they are often reticent to discuss issues that are sensitive and hurtful. A lot of guys still just kindof 'John Wayne' themselves through it....pull yourself up by the bootstraps.....you know, all of that old tough guy crap that just doesn't really do anything to get yourself unstuck....so you can move on.
My thoughts are that women may talk it out easier with people, where a lot of Men will just sit with it....and , you know, keep pickin' the scab. Poor basterdz.
Kimbo************************************ | |
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| who recovers faster after a breakup men or women?
Posted: 1/13/2009 4:03:24 PM | | You could cite a study but that doesn't mean it's accurate. Who participated in the study, were the questions biased, how big was the sample, how diverse was the sample, who did the study, who wrote the results, where did you find the results....just because someone says....this is the result of....doesn't make it true. | |
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