| Valentine's Day dinner for cheapies
Posted: 2/7/2009 7:21:25 AM | Here's a question for Valentine's Day based on an experience of mine from several years ago. the woman I was seeing at the time worked the night shift as a nurse and enjoyed going out for breakfast. Just before Valentine's Day I found some Denny's coupons in the paper for buy one/get one free meals. I decided to use to use one to take her out for breakfast. During breakfast however she discovered that I was planning to use the coupon,and she proceeded to tell me what a cheap bast*rd I was for doing so and how I'd ruined the day for her. Using a coupon apparently lessened my generosity and love for her.(Of course,she had no problem finishing her meal.)
Any opinions? Would this show good economic sense,or would the use of a coupon on Valentine's Day indeed prove how cheap a person really is? | |
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| Valentine's Day dinner for cheapies
Posted: 2/7/2009 7:51:07 AM | I can see different sides to this issue. IMO I think that if it was a first date, and you didnt talk about a location and the use of coupons in advance, some woman may feel slighted/unimportant, while other women might be impressed if your thriftyness.
If you have been dating a while, I think a person is silly if they dont take advantage of coupons as who doesn't want to save money.
I had this conversation with some girlfriends and some said they would be offended if a man wanted to use coupons while out with them I just lauged. I then asked my girlfriends, let me ask you this, if you were out shopping with a man, and you found something you wanted to buy for him and it had a reduced price sale sticker on it, would you go to the cashier and say I would rather pay full price for this item? They looked at me in horrir and said "of course not". My reply, well the same goes for the men, they too like to get a discount. That conversation ended quickly......lol.
I think the entire topic of coupons needs to be openly discussed, that is one sure way to find out if the 2 of you are compatible.
When a man I date talks about taking me out to dinner/meal, I always bring up the topic of coupons if I have any, as I have always believed that saving money is always a good thing. I have found that after the topic of coupons is dealt with, I am appreciative more by the man, for being interested in saving him money and he knows at that point, that I appreciative his generosity. For me, this senario makes both of us winners. | |
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| Valentine's Day dinner for cheapies
Posted: 2/7/2009 8:37:58 AM | I can not see using a coupon on the first date or until you get the feeling the other person does not have a problem with it. The way I look at it if you save half on a meal that means you can go out twice as much with the person.
I wonder if going out with someone who gets some free tickets loses its value because it did not cost the person any money? | |
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| Valentine's Day dinner for cheapies
Posted: 2/7/2009 9:01:35 AM | Yea I gotta agree with Print - leave the coupons until sometime down the road - not the best first date impression or "special date" impression. But I do support going dutch on a first date, especially if you meet on a dating site because it's almost like a business proposition ... lol ... so why should one or the other suck up the entire bill of a first date. It would be a little different if you did things "the old fashioned way" and you met at the supermarket or something; struck up a conversation and he asked you out. But there's still nothing wrong with the lady offering to go half when the dinner bill comes. But if it's a special occassion - and you've been dating awhile - then do it right boys - treat the lady right - it's like one day a year or something - afterall - gawd guys look at what she has to put up with the rest of the year..........hahahahaha.
Now if you had two free tickets to a game or a trip to Mexico or something - then that would be perfectly fine to use them on a first date.
PP
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| Valentine's Day dinner for cheapies
Posted: 2/7/2009 9:08:15 AM | well, i've been on a few dates were someone has had free tickets to a hockey game, or the monster truck jam or a concert - who cares? its something I wouldnt normally go to, and if i got tickets, I sure wouldnt want to go alone. It would be a treat, regardless.
I think too many people are spoiled, and looking to be spoiled in every sense of the word - which would explain why so many are up to their eyeballs in debt. Live WITHIN your means, DATE within your means, and there is less problems IMO
besides - for a first date - I always expect to go dutch. If I dont have the money, I dont go - i hate feeling like I "owe" my date something, because he took me out and paid... | |
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| Valentine's Day dinner for cheapies
Posted: 2/7/2009 9:25:00 AM | I think if your asked out for an evening it should not matter if a coupon is used...if your not paying the tab than why would you think you have a right to complain...does it make the food taste worst, does it show a habit of sticking your beek into other peoples choices....i see it as none of my business if someone is kind enuff to take you somewhere than to me is ignorant to think you can put your choice into someone else's
wallet and determine if they have value...that bugs me more than the coupon.roar.
why is the method of payment more significant than the time energy and effort to make a plan. credit to taking the initative to making a plan and taking the time to plan something nice...reguardless of if it was a perk of free tickets or what ever.
why would you not appreciate the effort and pretend it has less value...i don't understand perhaps... | |
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| Valentine's Day dinner for cheapies
Posted: 2/7/2009 9:41:27 AM | | I'm with pab. It's a free meal. Be gracious and accept it. Or take offence at the imagined or perceived slight. I remember once getting a gift certificate for $200 for that fancy steak place on Wellington for a "job well done". So I asked a woman out on a date there. She was mightily impressed, enjoyed the steak and the wine, the whole evening, but was offended when I used the gc! I never did get it. Nothing changed except that I didn't use cash to pay for the meal. And she really couldn't explain why she was offended, she just knew it was "wrong' and I was "cheap". I think I was gracious when I told her that a "thank you" was the most I was looking for. Who needs people in your life who would judge over so trivial a thing? Not me. | |
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| Valentine's Day dinner for cheapies
Posted: 2/7/2009 10:08:56 AM | Okay R/O - now your mind must still be suffering the fuzzy Saturday morning stuff .....
It's not a "free meal" - it's a "date" - huge difference. End of that discussion.
Second - there's a huge difference between a Denny's coupon and a $200 gift certificate "at that fancy steak place on Wellington" ......... Also end of that discussion.
My point was - hmmmmmm - let me see - how can I put this another way - in guy terms (ouch...lol) ...... okay would you show up on a "first date" or a "special date" in baggy dirty sweat pants and a wife beater t-shirt?????? That's my point - take a little time once in a while to go outside the box for that first date or that special occassion date. It's not about the money.
Kay - gotta fly POF'ers - have fun - way too nice a day to be sittin' in the house on this dam computer!
PP
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| Valentine's Day dinner for cheapies
Posted: 2/7/2009 12:41:17 PM | | I wouldnt bat an eye...who cares if he gets 20% off the bill(or whatever)...in fact...Ka-ching....I love a deal! | |
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| Valentine's Day dinner for cheapies
Posted: 2/7/2009 1:15:56 PM | My momma taught me the Chinese way. You just rattle off these three short sentences.
"How much for two?"
"We pay cash."
"Under 14, No tax"
If you get a deal, great. If not, move on. There are other deals to be had.
We all work hard for our money. There is no shame in maximizing the utility derived from your money.
That being said, I'm notorious for big ticket impulse buys simply because I want something. Saving money when I'm not buying out of lust affords me the luxury to indulge in the occasional impulse buy. | |
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| Valentine's Day dinner for cheapies
Posted: 2/7/2009 9:51:36 PM |
That's my point - take a little time once in a while to go outside the box for that first date or that special occassion date. It's not about the money.
I must be very bad at this date thing. Somehow i was under the impression they were all special. Maybe that is just ks.
If it is not about the money then the coupon should make no difference. Could it be about the date's own feelings of self worth? Might be the date is already feeling down and then seeing that coupon pop out just affirms their suspicion of themselves and they project that onto their date.
Personally i think coupons are for everyday use and the expense of a date should be paid cash unless it is something that makes the carrying of the amount needed unreasonable.
Now i would ask if a credit card is any better than a coupon? With those the bill isn't even paid until a month after the date has ended badly.
i hate feeling like I "owe" my date something, because he took me out and paid...
That is ludicrous! Why would you feel you owe anyone who asked you out on a date anything other than a simple thank you if the date went well. It used to be if someone asked you out they paid, life was good. It didn't matter who it was or any of that the person doing the asking paid, too easy. Why complicate that with "i owe him/her now because he/she paid for the date"? | |
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| Valentine's Day dinner for cheapies
Posted: 2/7/2009 9:56:10 PM | I dont get what the problem is? So its a coupon...doesnt matter if its a first date or any date. Why should it have to be an expensive meal? She should have been thankful it wasnt a McDonalds breakfast she was getting! | |
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| Valentine's Day dinner for cheapies
Posted: 2/7/2009 10:04:46 PM |
she proceeded to tell me what a cheap bast*rd I was for doing so and how I'd ruined the day for her.Any opinions?
My opinion is that nobody can ruin a day for you, you have to do that to yourself. Even wheather can't ruin the day it just makes it different. When people comment about such things just tell them the day is perfect but they simply have a poor attitude toward it. I do that with people complaining about storms, get some strange looks for that. | |
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| Valentine's Day dinner for cheapies
Posted: 2/8/2009 12:27:40 AM | | Material issues....I think too much expectations what does it matter if he wanted to use a coupon all the power to ya | |
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| Valentine's Day dinner for cheapies
Posted: 2/8/2009 5:53:06 AM |
I dont get what the problem is? So its a coupon...doesnt matter if its a first date or any date. Why should it have to be an expensive meal? She should have been thankful it wasnt a McDonalds breakfast she was getting!
But what if you have a 2 for 1 coupon from McDonalds? An early date is a good way to start your day. | |
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| Valentine's Day dinner for cheapies
Posted: 2/8/2009 7:11:03 AM | I think that coupon clipping is required now of days! So ...he did spend the money...he just found a way to take you out a second time and if your a humble person. YOu might just recognize that! Were in a recession! lol..I'd be happy with a picnic if it saved the person money!
It is about who you're with ..not what they spend! | |
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| Valentine's Day dinner for cheapies
Posted: 2/8/2009 10:00:13 AM | | OP, I think you should thank your lucky stars that you found out what she was about...sounds like someone is all about how much money you're spending on her...Just my opinion. | |
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| Valentine's Day dinner for cheapies
Posted: 2/8/2009 12:06:45 PM | I certainly wouldn't diss a woman for buying me dinner at 529, then pulling out a coupon.....
But I'm thinking my email box will still be empty....
... and my stomach. | |
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| Valentine's Day dinner for cheapies
Posted: 2/9/2009 6:15:58 AM | What about the guy who always asks about the "Senior's Discount" at the till?
Well.... I guess it's not really a "date" when it's Dad and he insists on picking up the tab at Joey's Fish & Chips.
It's really not ever about a "freebie". It's about having someone care enough to want to treat me. | |
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