| sex on the date
Posted: 10/9/2004 9:14:07 AM | | would you have sex on the first date ? | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 10/9/2004 3:38:11 PM | I was on a great first date a few years back, she was the kind of girl I would have invested alot of time and effort for. Smart, funny, great personality, beautiful inside and out. We actually met online that day, and after just a little while I convinced her that we should do something, as friends just to see if we have anything else in common. At no point in our first conversation did sex come up, Not that I wasn't interested. We decided that I would pick her up, and we'd drive around town some talking, we did that and then stopped down by the bay to walk along the shore. After a little of this, we were sitting talking about our lives like old friends reunited. About an hour later after stopping by the liquior store for what she said would make the night more relaxing we were sitting face to face over a card table playing poker. Many, many games later and an empty bottle of white burbon we were cuddled up on the couch as close as two people can get without having sex. We kissed, and it was magical..The kind you read about in books, but never happens to you. Constantly asking each other if the comfort level was good enough, and if either of us could do anything to make the other more so. Soon we were asleep.. or atleast she was..I laid there cuddled up close to her wondering how my dumbass had gotten so lucky to be with someone obviously so wonderful.. The next morning we woke up in each others arms..I kissed her and then we got up. She asked me to take her home, so I did. We talked a little on the way there, and I asked if I could call her later, she said yes.
After a couple days of calling to get a hang up I gave up. Months later she finally came online, and I demanded an explaination.. Turns out she was really hot for me, and really wanted to have sex that night, but since I hadn't even tried she was pissed, and offended. Enough that she wasn't willing to get in that situation again anytime soon.
The point of my story is that you just gotta do what feels right.. and if it's wrong.. ohwell. Theres Plenty of Fish out there. | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 10/9/2004 4:06:56 PM | | i'm 17......of cousre i'd have sex on the first date, i'd have sex with a girl i've just met 5 min ago, lol, d*mn youth. | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 10/9/2004 5:22:01 PM | | From a woman's perspective, you're d*mned if you do and you're d*mned if you don't. I can't figure out men for the life of me.. | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 10/9/2004 6:34:33 PM | Men are easy to understand:
1. We want sex, and sexual relief about 3-5 times a day at least (just whenever we get a hard-on), and if you (the girlfriend/wife, etc.) aren't there and someone else is, it's very hard to resist that woman. Although afterwards we hate ourselves for doing that.
2. We have natural egos that need to be reaffirmed a lot. If you (the gf) aren't making us feel like big men, like no other guy is good enough to be put in the same class, then we will like you a lot. Provided you're not being fake (and even if you are).
3. After we get off, sometimes (though rare) we are in the mood for talking and being loving, but most of the time we just want to sleep or watch TV until it's time to go again (which is usually within 15min so be ready;p)
If you understand this (which i imagine you do) then nothing unexpected will happen, just variance based on hobbies. | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 10/9/2004 7:25:54 PM | | I didn't mean in that way Singloman, I meant I don't understand men and sex on the first date..if you put out, you're easy and if you don't, you don't hear from either.. | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 10/9/2004 8:10:35 PM | Unless the date was supposed to be for sex in the first place, it's not a good idea to have sex on the first date. Dating is for spending time getting to know someone. I think what happens sometimes is people don't have the same idea, if they have any idea at all, of what a date is. So they get together to meet, and if they flirt at all, sex can take over. the younger a man is the more spontaneous is his sexual response. A young guy probably won't turn down the opportunity for sex, if flirting goes that far, although he probably wouldn't expect sex on a first date. If you have sex at first before you get to know each other, you'll either fall in love or not. If you don't, there's no point in a second date. If you do, it probably won't work out anyway, because then you're both off and running with your own separate and different and probably conflicting expectations for the relationship. Had you waited, you would have had the chance to get yourselves matched up as people so that when you did have sex, it would fit into your relationship.
I would have sex on the first date only because I think my chances of ever having sex again are so slim that to pass over any opportunity would be tragic. But I wouldn't expect it to work out in the long run. I wouldn't push for sex. I would show up expecting there to be no chance of sex. But if she got naked and begged real hard, I'd definitely do her.
I hope this helps clear things up about men and sex on the fisrt date. | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 10/10/2004 4:20:10 PM | flgriffin... I think that girl was no prize if she didn't think it was worth a second date just because you were a gentleman on the first one! She should've admired your self-restraint rather than being offended by it.
silken | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 10/10/2004 4:44:12 PM | | personally i agree with jen, either way seems to get you nowheres...personally i enjoy it if a guy doesnt try and jump me on the first outing cause the message i get is "he is just dating to get laid" i enjoy seeing a man be a gentleman:) | |
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GavJ
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Joined: 10/3/2004
Msg: 10 | |
| sex on the date
Posted: 10/10/2004 10:42:07 PM | I had sex on the first date with my ex, we were together 12 years after that.
It was really weird, but it worked. We fell for each other immediately, and there was no turning back, we went for it.
This is extremely risky, though, and your chances of getting really hurt are HIGH. But that being said, 'better to have loved and lost', rather than having forced down your instincts and left it alone? | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 10/11/2004 5:16:26 AM | If it was like 1965 maybe I would.
I have when I was young and dumb.
These days, nope!
OMG, I just realized I haven't had sex in over two years !!!
I mean I have gone 6 months, 9 months even a year without, but TWO flippin years!
That's just not natural for me!
No wonder thoughts of getting back into the dating world has come over me.
I think I might be broken?
Maybe I might have to write an sexual story to see if my sexuality is still present and working lol.
Gad even thinking about having sex it seems really awkward. Seriously I am wondering if that sexual motor and strong desire is broken in me!?!?!
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| sex on the date
Posted: 10/11/2004 5:40:30 AM | | lol Jeliarra been almost 3 yrs for me...guess you could say we are in same boat | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 10/11/2004 6:12:41 AM | | Ok well I want off Tarylsa1, I am feeling a bit sea sick...ROTF!!! | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 10/11/2004 6:32:58 AM | | lol yep me too but not just with anyone...waiting for the right one doesnt have to like my soul mate but i aint cracking on first date either:P ahh well soon | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 12/12/2004 10:57:58 AM | | in the past i had sex on many first dates. i even had sex where it wasn't a date at all. now there's no way i would do that. | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 12/12/2004 7:20:31 PM | I'm really hoping NONE of you take Singlo seriously.........if he's speaking for the male breed them I'm heading right down to the plastic surgeon of a Lopitoffahme.
I've had this other discussion with people and they all tell me I'm f***ed.
I don't do one night stands. Refuse to. There has to be emotion and trust there has to be that elusive "something" there. I'm not an ugly guy, I've had offers and invites but there has to be some time, some sharing and some connection. That takes more than one or two dates. I'd probably hold out for a couple months and hope that we had built to that level by then.
That does NOT mean I couldn't use a really good shag. I'm at the year mark BUT it's still a no-go for one nighters (first dates too) even though this Sperm Retention Headache is killing me! | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 12/13/2004 1:38:34 PM | Women have sex to get love,and Men use love to get sex.It's life | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 12/13/2004 1:50:05 PM | | Sex these days much like love is losing meaning. To me, having someone inside me is special. I wouldn't have sex with someone on the first date. | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 12/13/2004 6:08:52 PM | | Only if I'm out with a female... u hear that guys??? | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 12/13/2004 9:22:46 PM | | i need to be horny to make that connection! lmao i actaully need mental stimulation to be interested in hittin them skins eh!!! | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 12/14/2004 12:15:37 AM | | I wouldnt unless id known him for a while first before we went on the date. | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 12/14/2004 1:24:51 AM | | hey, i've seen you post before, you wanna hit this or what?? lol j/k | |
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| sex on the date
Posted: 12/14/2004 2:25:08 AM | | Never on the first, shows how cheap you are if you give in that fast. | |
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