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 Mikey7619
Joined: 5/14/2008
Msg: 1
Sex with a disabled personPage 1 of 2    (1, 2)
Out of curosity when scanning through profiles and coming across one that says he has a disability does it ever enter the woman's mind to write or not to write based on the thought what she thinks it might be like having sex with a disabled person and if the thought enters the mind about if I had kids with that guy wuold the kids also end up being disabled?
 no_1_bby
Joined: 5/3/2006
Msg: 2
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Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/13/2009 2:25:05 PM
A good friend of mine is in a chair. He has a wicked sense of humor and I love him dearly.. and he's hot!! If we were closer geographically, I'm sure we'd have the potential for some hot steamy moments. I know for a fact that his is not a genetic disability.. so the thought of it being passed on is not really there.
 nexthyme
Joined: 9/12/2007
Msg: 3
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Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/13/2009 3:21:55 PM
Mike, you are kidding right??? Is this something that crosses your mind???

How can any one person say what others think... I am not having kids at this age, so that isn't my first thought. As well not all disabilities mean a person is unable to have sex.

Pfffftttt no wonder women get the impression men only think about sex
 mischief3178
Joined: 1/4/2009
Msg: 4
Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/13/2009 3:41:54 PM
speaking from a mans stand point lol umm, would it be a bad thing to not see the disablity? i mean it's all about attraction ain't it? if you like someone stuff like that don't matter dose it?
 1greyghost
Joined: 10/22/2008
Msg: 5
Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/13/2009 3:50:40 PM
i honestly put that i am disabled on my profile. i was born with a club foot and a double cleft palate. it's something that would honestly come up while considering having children. but has no berring on my ability to have a healthy sexual relationship with someone.
 Mikey7619
Joined: 5/14/2008
Msg: 6
Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/13/2009 4:37:54 PM
No I was just curious if if a guy wuold see a woman/man is disabled if they might think the guy might have problems in bed. It was just a question I've been wondering about.

In my profile I put that I've got a slight case of CP and I keep getting read/deleted messages so I thought maybe its something that a woman might think about.
 1greyghost
Joined: 10/22/2008
Msg: 7
Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/13/2009 6:02:45 PM
join the club if i had a buck for every time that hapened my first date would be in hawaii
 Dan33702
Joined: 5/11/2008
Msg: 8
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Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/13/2009 8:37:07 PM
I have a physical disability that isn't genetic. I wouldn't want to post that in my profile cause this is a dating site, not a site for women looking for fertility. I would hope that child bearing would be the last thing a woman thinks about when viewing profiles.
 Rae327
Joined: 11/3/2008
Msg: 9
Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/13/2009 8:53:26 PM
Not the first thing on my mind...

I have a disability too, but I did not put it in my profile... hmmm, maybe I should, guys would wanna know what hanging out with a deaf girl is like?? just kidding. Kudos to you for being open and honet about it, and if "the right one" swims along, she will not be put off by it. My neice has a severe case of CP, but she's still a great person. I think people who judge others because of disabilities... well, I do not think highly of them!
 GREATEST LOVER
Joined: 2/10/2009
Msg: 10
Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/13/2009 8:55:13 PM
well i had sex with a chic with two broken legs on crutches, i had to carry her upstairs to the bedroom. and i had sex with one with broken ribs, i couldn't lay on top of her. it seems no matter what position we did it in, she was writhing in pain..that was a tough one...lol
 ForumFilly
Joined: 5/14/2008
Msg: 11
Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/13/2009 9:23:24 PM
I guess it would depend on what the disability was and if it is genetically carried. I'm way past having kids, so for me, meeting a man with a genetic disability wouldn't be a problem, nor would a developed or accidental disability. I think it very well may be different for younger women in their child-bearing years. I would be much more inclined to avoid someone with a genetic disability if I was planning on having children. That's just a fact of life. Why put that burden on yourself and your offspring if you can avoid it?

I have a condition called dysautonomia and I am severely limited in what I can do physically. I have it stated on my profile, so a man knows that before he contacts me (if he reads the profile!). I have met some wonderful men who have absolutely no problem with my limitations and I adore them for it. But again, I'm at a different stage in my life than you are, OP. I'm sure you have discussed with your physician the chances of your offspring having the disease. If not, do so. Be honest with the women you meet and let them decide for themselves. Good luck to you!
 Mikey7619
Joined: 5/14/2008
Msg: 12
Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/13/2009 9:25:19 PM
Cerebral Palsy is not genetic
 ForumFilly
Joined: 5/14/2008
Msg: 13
Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/13/2009 9:34:32 PM

Cerebral Palsy is not genetic

Well, there you go! I would think that for many women, it wouldn't be a problem. We all roll the dice when it comes to having healthy children. I wish you the very best!
 itsmeaaron
Joined: 4/2/2007
Msg: 14
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Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/13/2009 9:37:21 PM
i wouldn't have a problem with it, i'm not shallow, i mean if they're paralyzed from the neck down or something, i'll draw the line.
 Mikey7619
Joined: 5/14/2008
Msg: 15
Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/14/2009 6:30:47 AM
Yes but you see some women dont know that. When they hear CP they think of someone in a wheelchair who needs constant care not knowing that there are varying degrees of CP or any disability for that matter
 spicynicegirl
Joined: 8/10/2008
Msg: 16
Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/14/2009 6:55:32 AM
I will admit that it does sound a little difficult when you first read that in a profile. However if I'm attracted to them then I'm attracted to them. If not, then it's not necessarily about the disability.
 footballmom77
Joined: 1/5/2009
Msg: 17
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Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/14/2009 7:36:03 AM

Yes but you see some women dont know that. When they hear CP they think of someone in a wheelchair who needs constant care not knowing that there are varying degrees of CP or any disability for that matter.


So then take it out of your profile. Or put it at the end instead of it being the first line. Putting it first makes it sounds like its the most important/biggest part of who you are. And according to you, this "disability" really doesnt affect your life that much.
 1eyebob
Joined: 8/11/2008
Msg: 18
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Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/14/2009 8:07:56 AM

In my profile I put that I've got a slight case of CP and I keep getting read/deleted messages so I thought maybe its something that a woman might think about.


I don't think the read/delete has anything to do with any disability. It is just that the women on here get alot of attention from men and they are somewhat spoiled. I think that many of them start to hold men up to unfair criteria and don't respond because they don't pass the test of age or looks. Some of these same women that do this are here in the forums lamenting about how there are no more good men on POF but yet will not make the effort to get to know them to make a real informed decision about how good they are. Many will use the excuse of too many emails from perverts and sex addicts. I would be willing to bet that this is mostly younger men and that you even respond to some of them due to looks and sensuality (just to try to talk to them and see if you can reform them and make them better men). If you are offended by sexually explicit emails block the sender and report them. Don't take it out on all of us.

If you are 40+ get over it ladies!! We are not young any more, we can't all be pretty boys and we have many fine attributes that would endear us to you if you gave some of us the chance. I read a post on another thread where a young woman discribed over forty men as all balding, fat, gray and out of shape (her discription was much more detailed and long on faults but for the sake of brevity this is the main points). This is not true of most of us I think but yet women seem to get that impression while on here. Some of the same guys that you don't respond to on here you would have talked with and gotten to know if you had met them in your home enviornment. Why not start giving us poor guys a break ladies? I don't know how many guys on here that I have seen post about the majority read/delete without reponse. Is this right and sensible? No This is supposed to be a dating site and I have never sent a perverted post to a woman in my life. Just not me.

I just wanted to say that alot of us men have a problem with the read/delete syndrome so you are not alone OP.
Bob
 Mikey7619
Joined: 5/14/2008
Msg: 19
Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/14/2009 8:13:26 AM
I kind of figured that alot of men get read/deleted but I just wanted to find out if it had anything to do with being slightly physically different in my case. Your post opened my eyes 1 eyebob..

All the best to everyone
 nexthyme
Joined: 9/12/2007
Msg: 20
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Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/14/2009 8:48:34 PM
Mike, there seems to be a lot more people than you realized with disabilities...

One to avoid is saying you have mental illness... That is a killer no matter what, it is one of those that I personally think gets explained on a date... Not something that works well announcing in a profile...

I have fibromyalgia... I have fought it for 20 yrs, and has of yet come to grips with who I used to be and who I am now... Of course I have to add 10 yrs ago I blew three disc in my neck and a Dr botched the job...

The only thing I was asked by men is that limited my ability to perform oral... Land all might, is that all they can worry about??? LOL, oh yes you were asking kind of the same question..

Does CP limit your life to the point that YOU can't enjoy it, or be who you really are?

If not then you just haven't met the right person that is looking for YOU....

Don't give up, or let something like that limit who you think you are. People on dating sites have some ODD outlooks, and then some are kicked back, and accepting of good people...

Good luck...
 My I
Joined: 1/23/2007
Msg: 21
Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/14/2009 9:37:22 PM
The only thing I would have to come to grips with is sex in the vehicle. I'm not certain I can deal with fvcking our brains out in the handicap parking spaces.... always being so close to the doors and pedestrian traffic can be intimidating. I'll have to practise at being an exhibitionist. After the first few times I guess it will be ok........ I've been told I have very good adaptive qualities.


I've worked in facilities where there were disabled people.... it's not difficult forgetting they even have disabillities when their charm, wit and great personality take precedence.

Oddly enough, I know of a woman in a wheelchair who is also a criminal (credit card theft, among other thongs). Who would ever imagine a disabled person being a criminal? It's kinda the same thing.... if you ignore the physical aspect of a person, they can be as wonderful as anyone else... and as criminal too -
 LucOberdere
Joined: 3/12/2008
Msg: 22
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Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/14/2009 9:52:40 PM
Well I have a BAD case of tunnel carpal from typing away on here...

Maybe that has been the reason !










 Evan M.
Joined: 6/4/2008
Msg: 23
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Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/14/2009 11:49:01 PM
You're not the only one who thinks/worries about that.

I also was born with CP. Use a cane as well as an electric wheelchair.

Right now my profile doesn't say anything about me being disabled (LOL but if they see this forum note on my main page they'll start to get an idea) though the pics I have on there do show me standing with a cane. I also get a lot of read/never reply, read/deleted messages. I do realize its par for the course in terms of compatability, but you'll always wonder.

Its also something I'd never hide from anyone who was interested in me and I'd let them know fairly quickly into talking but you do wonder if just putting it flat out there like that will be a deterrant for some women and I err or the side of caution.

Granted, I'm aware I don't really want those women if its enough of a big deal but people are superficial enough as it is nowadays (and I'd have to include myself at times as well) and unfortunately, once it actually does happen to you that someone flat out says they're not interested because of your disability (which has been said to me directly) you'll suspect everyone else is possibly thinking it, but not saying it.

Even though you know you've got to put yourself out there to be sure and find out and not let anyone really worthwhile get away.

LOL same thoughts go for sex too.
 jp5900
Joined: 11/24/2006
Msg: 24
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Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/15/2009 12:09:08 AM
I'm a disabled person ,I was born with spina bifida, Have a handicap should stop anyone from dating, having sex,having kids unless you were stupid like I was and lost the friendship with someone I cared about that should have anything to do with it. it's from the heart
 jp5900
Joined: 11/24/2006
Msg: 25
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Sex with a disabled person
Posted: 2/15/2009 12:12:47 AM
AMEN BROTHER NOW THATS WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT
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