| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 7:06:17 AM | | I was wondering if anyone has an experience of the whole "let's just be friends" thing actually working out. I am still civilized to most of my ex's and on the surface we get along great, but we are by no means really friends anymore. I just went through a break up of an 8 month relationship and still love him, but he was my best friend before the relationship too and I am afraid to lose that if I just cut him off in order to get over him. I don't just want this to end up like the rest where we get along on the surface but not underneath. | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 7:07:42 AM | Sure, I'm friends with my ex-wife and ex-girlfriens. Heck, I went to the movies with my ex-girlfriend last night. It's better to be friends than enemies. Hope this helps.
Glenn | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 7:16:35 AM | In my experiance, it's nearly impossible to remain friends with an ex. It's especially hard, I find, to see them for the first time with someone else.
The only time I've ever had it work for me was one of my best friends that I've known since grade 2. We dated briefly in Junior High but it was a long distance relationship. Really, I've always seen her as the one that got away. She's engaged now, though, so it's not like I'm going to try persuing her or anything.
Oy, that just went totally off topic. | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 7:18:06 AM | | Oddly, I am friends with exlovers, but avoid the exhusbands like the plague. | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 7:20:46 AM | | I actually have an ex as a roommate. And he will be here until August. He had nowhere to go, so I said he could stay. It is hard because he thinks that we can still try to be together. We fight all the time or ignore each other. It is stressful at best, but if I had the chance to do it again, I would. I couldnt just turn him to the streets. | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 7:37:47 AM | | Anyone else have an opinion on this?...i am in the EXACT same situation as the OP. | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 7:44:12 AM | | Emily, you are in that awful position of making a decision. You might give it a try a bit longer, and be sure which way to go. Now the doubt makes any decision one way or another premature. But if you turn away now, the possibility of maintaining or restoring what you had will be lost for sure. You have got to get inside his soul to really see him. I can't say what to do because I have no idea of what was involved in your break up. | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 7:45:28 AM | | not realy friends with X wiufe but we dont fight anymore we have a son together so thats pretty much all there is just to parents trying to do whats right when it comes to our kid she has a boyfriend and i dont go there but it seems sometimes she trys to get in my crap when i have a girlfriend hummm i think its cuz i have my son but as far as friends i dont know if thats what i would call it | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 7:59:57 AM | No way
I just got out of an almost 2 year relationship 3 months ago, she wanted to keep me around as "friends" until she met someone else, i just told her straight up that I wanted more than that from her and if now thats all she wanted we should stop talking all together. I don't believe in the whole "sex buddies" thing. I haven't heard from her since. | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 8:08:07 AM | | Why bother? What's the point? I don't see how being really close to someone I used to sleep with is going to make my next partner feel comfortable with the idea that we're not getting back together at some point. I can be friends but I don't try to spend a lot of time together. My ex-wife and I talk and joke sometimes on the phone but I don't want to hang out with her. It's over, that's why we're ex's. | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 8:11:46 AM | | my exhusband and I are the best of friends. It wasnt a bitter break up, just fell out of love. It helps out soo much in providing as much stability as possible to our children. Now my exfiance is another story...No way would I ever be friends with him! | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 8:14:17 AM | | Anyone I know who is still friends with their ex's are still gettin' it on with them. | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 8:20:58 AM | Touch me, girl I love you , you know that I do, but that is bunk.
I do not and will NOT ever go near my ex again. The thought os having sex with him gives me the willies. The sex was never any good to begin with but now I have too much contempt for him, to ever be intimate with him, ever. | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 8:22:47 AM | __I am still friendly with exwife. She set up this computer for me. (I am a computer virgin).
__I go for coffee with a ex girlfriend. She always complains about her present husband. What a laugh. No "getting it on" for me.
Gilles | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 8:23:42 AM | | touch me, that may be true with your friends and if that is the case then I hope their isnt kids involved in that situation. If two peopl are mature enough and care abou their childrens well being then " getting it on " is not the issue, the kids are. | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 8:45:09 AM | Four States make for a good buffer zone, but I do talk , chat discuss issues that concern us both such as children of the broken marriage.
No sleeping or sex involved, long before the ink was dry on the divorce decree these activities stopped.
This post seems to concern lack of control, or just poor judgement. | |
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rc3
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Joined: 4/29/2005
Msg: 18 | |
| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 9:05:15 AM | I tried the getting along with ex's thing ... it is a waste of time... The fact is that either you can't trust them or they can't trust you... That fact alone pretty much means you can't be much more than friendly aquaintences.... at BEST!
I wouldn't be comfortable with dating a woman who had regular contact with her ex... In fact, as soon as I realized he was still around I would dump her and add her to the ever growing no contact list...
There are billions of people in the world.... You eliminated one... you have billions to go before you run out of people to deal with.... Seems pointless to worry about the one... | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 9:09:57 AM | Actually im going through that right now. we just broke up after 2. 4 years. he wants to remain friends but wow, im finding it too hard right now. i want to block and delete him on my messenger, but cant. have tried like 4 times, then added him again. also i find it hard to read his msn names he puts up. kinda like a blow to the heart. well, i know i cant remain friends, civil yes, but not friends. i will delete his name as soon as i can.
MM | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 9:34:29 AM | I'm still on decent terms with all of my ex'es but one... and I'm not still sleeping with any of them.
That idea is ludicrous. | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 9:36:25 AM | If you want any new relationships to work. Cut him loose and leave him alone | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 9:37:30 AM | | You c don't have to be friends or enemies. how about just nothing. gh101 | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 9:38:37 AM | | my ex husband and i are still good friends. It's amazing how i couldn't stand him while we were married but we get along now. I big sigh of relief that i am not longer raising him! lol | |
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ksue44
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Joined: 6/20/2005
Msg: 24 | |
| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 9:40:03 AM | Absolutely - my ex BF of 5 months, we're still friends. In fact, he enjoys fixing things around the house. We have a good time of teasing and chatting back and forth.
Just because there is a breakup doesn't mean you have to be enemies. In fact, if a relationship must come to an end, its better to do it in a loving way, because the next relationship you enter into will be that much better.
Don't cut off the contact just because there isn't anything romantic anymore. Besides, it's great having a good friend in your life. | |
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| Friends with the ex?
Posted: 6/26/2005 9:41:25 AM | lol people! please don't tell me that I don't know my friends, or I don't know anyone 
In my group of friends, and the ones who are still single and are friends with the ex's are all having friends with benefits sex with them. I'm not saying YOU all are, but in my life, yes my dears, they are
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