| don't you just hate mind games!
Posted: 6/27/2005 9:35:55 PM | I'm so pissed off right now...God knows why i keep signing up to new chat sites or dating sites....why men feel they need to play with womens heads is beyond me...they are so friggin clever at it,specially when they come across someone as gullable as me....although they dont get far with me...but in the beginning they do have me sorta believing in them,but my female intuition is always in the back of my mind...i dont know,maybe i have..the words.."i'm easy,and stupid,so come **** me" written on my forehead!...but when a guy IM'S me..i give them a chance to chat with me..they all seem like butter wouldnt melt in thier mouth,the way they sweet talk you..OH yes,men sure do know what women want to hear,anyway,after a few IM's..they start talking shit...the topic of sex comes up and if you dont respond,thay quickly do a runner!.....****ing typical!...the reason why i'm so jacked of is that i actually get to like these guys...i try to give them the benifit of the doubt....but as usual they screw me over!.are there any other women that experience this? | |
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| don't you just hate mind games!
Posted: 6/27/2005 9:53:08 PM | If a guy mentions sex before he even meets you, then that's all he has on his mind. Plus, you have to keep in mind that any guy wanting sex....will do just about anything to get it. Well, any guy that isn't afraid to be deceptive...and maybe be considered an ***hole a time or two.
I probably sound like I'm giving guys a bad name. But...I live with guys...go to school with guys. Any "guy talk" about women is, pretty much, always about sex. Even so to a point where it makes ME sick sometimes.
Mind you, I probably have a limited perspective on this matter. I am a college guy hanging out with other college guys.
Anyway, my perspective on the matter. The only good thing about chatting with them first online...is that they're probably going to get to the point much quicker. People say things over the internet they'd otherwise never say in the midst of a real person.
TAKE ME FOR EXAMPLE! Heh. | |
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| don't you just hate mind games!
Posted: 6/27/2005 10:17:44 PM | | Unfortunatly mind games are apart of everyones life weather they like it or not, its just how you react and play the game that makes you who you are. | |
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xoxox
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Joined: 6/27/2005
Msg: 5 | |
| don't you just hate mind games!
Posted: 6/27/2005 10:36:44 PM | With your profile and pics, sex comes to mind first. I would expect to start out with some small talk then get to sex pretty quickly, if I was online looking for sex. So I think if you find this happens a lot, it may well be that other men also see your sexy side and are coming along to take you up on what seems like an offer. Right or wrong you have to take into account not only what you wish to project, but also how people tend to respond to what you show them. Come light my fire, and the pics, that's all sex.
You do have the power to set limits on when things get sexual. You can let guys know up front you're intrested in chatting but not about sex. then if they cross the line, cut them off. It might be a good idea to wait to decide if you like them to see if they can chat for a half hour before they take one hand off the keyboard. You have the power to set the limits for how men treat you. | |
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| don't you just hate mind games!
Posted: 6/27/2005 10:46:05 PM | | Thanks for that!...i'm well aware that men respond to sexual pics and such....but that doesnt mean we are looking for it...i think my pics are quite tame compared to a lot of others who show their naked butt or boobs...it's like a girl dresses a little saucy to go out to a club...does that autamatically mean shes out to get laid?....and if she ends up being sexually abused..is she branded with the words..."you asked for it"...men shouldnt assume that women are after sex just because they like to dress sexy!...women like to feel sensual and flaunt what they have at times....but never assume we want sex! | |
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| don't you just hate mind games!
Posted: 6/27/2005 10:46:52 PM | | I'm a bit confused here I'm looking at your profile and there is definetley ummmm, well a picture of your ass. I'm not too sure of what kind of guys your trying to attract but I'm pretty sure that its probably going to be guys who like womens asses. So here is the thing I'm sure your using the feminine wyles that God gave you but your probably going to have to step your game up a bit. The first thing I thought when I went to your profile was "she has a great bod". Now I was reading through the profile there and it was all good, buuuuut I don't think that anything you say in the profile can be overshadowed by the fact that there is a picture of your ass. What kind of guys did you expect to respond to you. Your sending the wrong message here. I'm sure that your very proud of your figure, as well you should be, but you probably have a better chance of meeting horny dudes rather than guys serious about anything | |
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| don't you just hate mind games!
Posted: 6/27/2005 10:52:21 PM | | yes..granted..u r right..and i appreciate your advice...but even though my butt is not naked?..are we not allowed to even show some parts of our body(not naked)..just because we are proud of it?..without people thinking we are sending a certain message?...why judge!why do sum men have pics of their cars or bikes...what are we meant to go for him just cos he has nice wheels? | |
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| don't you just hate mind games!
Posted: 6/27/2005 10:55:14 PM | Ah yes...I didn't notice your profile until someone pointed it out. Yes, that's your problem. There's not just ONE ass picture...but TWO. By the way, it is very nice, but I'm normally not the type to say that.
THAT ASSIDE!
Definitely change the pictures that are in your profile. Any male on the planet that looks at those pictures is going to think you're after a good time. Plus, women that dress sexy are sending a sexual message to men. Whether you mean to do it or not...the more skin you show...the more a man reads into it.
I personally don't like girls that feel they have to show off in a sexy way to get any attention. To me, it IS sending the wrong signals. I'd rather know what's in your head, rather than your bra. | |
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xoxox
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Joined: 6/27/2005
Msg: 10 | |
| don't you just hate mind games!
Posted: 6/27/2005 11:01:55 PM | You can deal with how you think men ought to respond, and you can also deal with how they actually do respond. If advice and your own experience suggest that the proifile and pics attract men in a sexual manner, well, I guess it's up to you to decide what approach will give you the results you want.
I think it's fun to be sexy just to be sexy. It doesn't mean men should assume you want sex. It is fair that they will think of sex. And from there it's no surprise they will proposition you for sex. You can always say no, but as long as you're being sexy like that, don't you think it's a pretty safe bet some guy will come along and see if he can talk you into having sex with him?
From the guy's point of view, he is looking around online and he finds this sexy looking woman being sexy. he thinks, cool! I like her! I want to reach out and get me some of that! His mind is already thinking of sex because of the fact you are presenting your sexiness. If you start having a conversation about rocket science, what is he supposed to do with his sexual interest in you?
It's sometimes a good idea to be only slightly sexy at first with strangers. that way you hint at being sexual, but it's not the first thing that men notice about you. This gives them a chance to notice other things and think of something else besides what you look like naked.
It's a free world and you are entitled to be as sexy as you want. More power to you. But if you advertise with sexy and then can't figure out why men come looking for sex, you need a new ad agency. | |
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| don't you just hate mind games!
Posted: 6/27/2005 11:13:41 PM | | Don't ask someone who was giving you advice why you can't show certain body parts. It's human nature, you show off an ass, what does it look like you're advertising. And what is the headline supposed to mean? Try and class up the pro. a bit if you want better goods. | |
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| don't you just hate mind games!
Posted: 6/27/2005 11:18:03 PM | OK..OK..i get ur point...but,i thought i was being just a "little"..sexy...by not showing myself butt naked..which i would never show...just a hint of sexiness is what i thought!..unfortunatly..men wont approach unless you show a hint of sexiness...in real life it's different,cos they can see your face,smile,the way you carry urself,without dressing provocatively,to attract their attention...then hopefully,they will notice that you have inner beauty as well!...on here it's not so.!..thanks guys | |
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| don't you just hate mind games!
Posted: 6/27/2005 11:21:23 PM | | Try showing more of the body then, not just one body part. It can still be sexy if you've got a full body shot and not just your face on a webcam shot. Choose wisely...you're right...not on here. Too many men get the wrong messages. It's just like public though, if a girl goes out in a mini-skirt, she's "asking for it"... | |
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| don't you just hate mind games!
Posted: 6/27/2005 11:25:49 PM | Also, you know what I can't see much of? Your face! Smile! A pretty smile will make any man melt. But in the right way. Plus, it might portray a sense of happiness? Happiness meaning you're going to be a nice person when/if you meet Mr. Whoever.
You ARE going to be nice.....right? | |
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| don't you just hate mind games!
Posted: 6/28/2005 12:16:49 AM | darn it! you guys are gonna make her take down that very nice butt shot now =( I liked that picture.
Seriously though, your on a free internet dating site, you get what you pay for as they say. If you think your going to meet the soulmate of a lifetime through internet dating as a whole I have a nice bridge in Brooklyn I would be willing to sell you ;)
Just have fun and live life a little, if the dork makes u feel something u don't like click the lil' X in the upper right hand corner and close the chat window. Your putting the weight of the entire world on the shoulders of an internet dating site puuuuleaeeeese LOL
get realistic meeka!!!
/hugz
btw, who gave u permission to travel over to another internet dating site? Your ours now meeka, you have to finish your fishing here until all your lures are gone lol
....oh look a lil baby worm in the tackle box...hehe | |
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| don't you just hate mind games!
Posted: 6/28/2005 12:26:10 AM | | lol...ur so funny passionfly...and thanks for making me feel welcomed to POF....as for coeray....i'm always nice...i have 2 face shots in profile...what more do u want..sheeshhh!...And cndn..depends on the venue you are wearing a mini skirt to as to how ppl percieve you...in Aussie...the summers are very hot and dry..i'm always in denim mini skirts,when i;m out shopping or down the beach,as casual wear...i' would never wear one to a club..but have been known to wear flowy,feminine,short shirts! | |
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| don't you just hate mind games!
Posted: 6/28/2005 12:30:46 AM | Okay okay! Not trying to be too critical...I'm just bored, okay? ;)
Don't feel bad on my account. I think most of this is silly myself. Online forums are good for building a small community, but not for getting personal with anybody. Passionfly is right. | |
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| don't you just hate mind games!
Posted: 6/28/2005 12:33:58 AM | | yeah..i agree..actually this is my first forums i've ever participated in...well,theres nothing else to do on this site..i signed up actually thinking it was an aussie free chat site....not after i signed did it explain that it's also a dating site..with instant msg'ing..but no chat rooms:(..still,some of these forums can be quite helpfull! | |
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| don't you just hate mind games!
Posted: 6/28/2005 12:46:50 AM | Yeah I've been in all kinds of forums before. But they're usually related to games or some other particular interest. Forums about relationships and dating are kind of...weird.
Because every single person on the planet has a different perspective of the matter. :D Moreso than for other subjects. Getting on here and asking someone for relationship advice is like posting a random sign out on the street asking for help with your marriage!
It feels that impersonal. :x | |
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| don't you just hate mind games!
Posted: 10/29/2007 1:25:37 PM | How can they play mind games when they are on a computer with you?
It is your fault that you believe in what they say.
Don't blame others for your mistakes. Start paying attention to real people, not letters on a computer screen. | |
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