| Is there REALLY someone out there for everyone?
Posted: 3/19/2009 10:15:15 AM | | I've been thinking lately if there really is someone out there for me. I haven't had much luck with dating for a while, and I have no luck with women at all where I live. I always hear people say things like 'you'll find someone,' but I don't always believe it. I'm not sure what to do. | |
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| Is there REALLY someone out there for everyone?
Posted: 3/19/2009 11:14:58 AM | If its ment to be then you will find that some one that you will be with hun ...
You are who you are with or without another person in your life ...
Wish you the best ...
AnglFLyn | |
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| Is there REALLY someone out there for everyone?
Posted: 3/19/2009 11:50:05 AM | How about some humor hun ...
You want a woman in your life huh ? ... Tired of being alone ? ... Lets see hummmm let your facial hair grow out all dangly and scruffy ... Dont bathe for atleast a week or so (that is to help with the fear stuff) ... Go get some animal skins and a club ... Dress your self in the animal skins and DONT forget the club hun ... Go down to the local market and when you see one that you like ... For special effects let out some HUGE GRUNTS ... Be sure and take good aim ... trust me on this ...  ... THUMP it over the head once or twice with your handy club ... (how ever many times it takes to knock it out) ... Throw it over your shoulder (grunt some more for more special effects and fear) then drag it home ... Put it in your cave ... There ya go hun ... Its yours ... You might wanna drug it up or something cause they can be a little on the roughty side after that ... ...
Im going out this Sun and getting me one of those man thangs ... When I catch it Im going to take and keep it in the basement in a cage with my 100lb dog gaurding it ... He will be MINE ... I hope I dont forget to feed and water it ... ..
OP Its not being alone that bothers me its being lonely ... but I keep a sense of humor about it ... Life is too short ...
AnglFlyn | |
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| Is there REALLY someone out there for everyone?
Posted: 3/19/2009 5:33:43 PM | | Complete myth. There really isn't. Probably best thing is marry the wrong person and have some kind of relationship for a few years while the divorce goes through. | |
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| Is there REALLY someone out there for everyone?
Posted: 3/19/2009 6:00:34 PM | I believe there is someone out there for each of us, though our ability to find this person may be a great challenge. How high of a priority are you putting on finding someone? Is it like as hard as people that try to find an organ donor match or they die without it? How many methods are you trying to find someone?
Just some random thoughts from an optimist.... | |
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toyoux
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Joined: 5/28/2006
Msg: 10 | |
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| Is there REALLY someone out there for everyone?
Posted: 3/19/2009 9:08:03 PM | | I don't know dude i'm kinda like you too. I always wonder. People always tell you all this positive thinking and you go along with it for a while and nothing in your life seems to change. Then life kinda just leaves you there alone and broken. It doesn't wait for you to get back on both your feet again. So I don't know the answer to that because I HAVE NEVER had any luck at all. NEVer..probably never will...It's like people don't give people a shot. It's just what's wrong with the world today.... | |
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| Is there REALLY someone out there for everyone?
Posted: 3/19/2009 9:15:10 PM | I did a simple search and there are like 2 dozen threads on this topic, asked almost exactly the same way...
You sound desperate and you sound like you've given up... With an attitude like that, there is No One out there for you, because people don't want that kind of person... So go to a Self Esteem class, they are usually free or close to it and are run by community centers and sometimes hospitals...
To actually answer the question... There might be, but it might not be the type of person you have in mind... You no doubt want a woman that is at least a 7 or 8 on a 1 to 10 scale, in looks... You probably want someone who is rather wealthy so that you can slum it, working dead end jobs whenever she gets on your case about not working... Someone who worships the ground you walk on...
Well, the woman that is out there for you is probably a 4 to 6 if not a 3 or 2... She has a few bucks in the bank depending on how much fun she had that month... And will love you and be faithful, but not quite worship you... And she has pet-peeves that you will do that will cause her to be pissed from time to time and probably has habits that will piss you off from time to time...
It's Called Compromise, I know it's a big word, but sound it out, you can do it... Anyone can be with anyone if they are willing to work on it... But everyone has their standards which is what causes loneliness...
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| Is there REALLY someone out there for everyone?
Posted: 3/19/2009 10:07:51 PM | Okay you guys, stop being so friggin down!! OP, you and Aznflavor are really young still to be so ...
It's like people don't give people a shot. It's just what's wrong with the world today....
Whats "Wrong" with the world today is everyone and I mean EVERYONE needs to take responsibility for his/ her own reactions not just actions.
Other people are not responsible for how you react to their actions.. ya know??
Think about it a moment... your feelings are your own. So OWN them.
And it's long believed that 'There is someone out there for all of us', but you know what they say too... just when you stop looking so hard you find it.
And there is more than just one too... I know alot of people believe we all have that one certain soul mate..bla bla bla
Guys and girls like you need to relax, like you I mean the ones that get so down on themselves.. like your profile..
For fuk sakes, change the BottomDweller, for one thing. And take out the part about not having much luck with women.
Do you really think that sounds attractive? You are a good looking guy, you have interesting interests.
Just get your self esteem in check, and stop feeling so down about what you don't have..
I'm not even gonna go into the whole "Take up a hobby" splew, you have a hobby your guitar and music.
The woman of your dreams could be right around the next corner you turn, do you think she'd look twice at a sulking, feeling sorry for himself, I have no luck with women kinda guy?
Play up and be proud of your talents!
Self confidence is super sexy!! | |
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| Does it never take practice on how to get a girlfriend? do guys know how to talk to women without
Posted: 3/31/2009 1:55:16 PM | Practice? I'm just wondering because I have never had a girlfriend in my whole life, always been single, and I just turned 21 last January. It's not because I have chosen to be single this long, it's just that I never knew how, and I still don't know how to get a girlfriend or a date. I don't know how to take the initiative. It's not because I am shy, scared, nervous, fear of rejection, etc. It's just that I don't know how!!!!, I simply do not know how. Every girl that I have been interested in, made the first move on, asked out, overall, took the initiative, either A.). Had a boyfriend already B.) Rejected me, not interested. So I'm thinking that is why I am still single, and always have been.
So I am obviously different from most other guys, because almost every guy has his first girlfriend before the age 21, almost 100 percent. Anyway, is almost every guy, excluding me, born with the social skills, conversation skills, body language skills, approaching skills, and confidence, in order to approach and attract girls? and get the girls to become their girlfriends? Is almost every guy naturally born with these skills? As soon as most guys become interested in girls, at puberty, or whatever, do they naturally know how to talk to girls, approach them, start a conversation and keep it going, and knowing how and when to ask them out? It sure seems this way, like every guy knew how to get his first girlfriend from day one. Are all of these skills an instinct? did it never take these guys practice? Did they all have these skills from the moment they went on the quest to get their first girlfriend? | |
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| Please...
Posted: 3/31/2009 2:13:12 PM | I would also be in that group of men that didn't have a girlfriend before being 21, where the key for me is that I just didn't really socialize much before my early 20s. I think some guys do get into social circles earlier and these guys are the ones that may find it easier to date though that is just a guess on my part.
I was interested in girls for a few years before my first girlfriend but I was terrified of talking to women and even remember well, being frozen once in university where there was a floor-mate of mine and me in the lounge and in walked 3 women and my body became as close to a statue as possible and I just couldn't really talk at all. I did get over that fear but it took some time as well as socializing with women around for a while before I got up the nerve to just go out and have a relationship. | |
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Posted: 3/31/2009 2:17:45 PM | | Women have it so much easier when it comes to Romance, Dating, and Relationships. Love comes to them, us Men have to fight tooth and nail for it. | |
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Posted: 3/31/2009 2:24:24 PM | Are you saying that you are incapable of learning, billabongdude06? If you are then I can understand your social skills not improving, but chances are you do have the ability to learn and adapt to situations which really means that you may have to learn from those willing to teach as well as practice and see how this works in the real world as I think if you honestly work on learning how to talk to people and make small talk, it may not be as hard as you think to ask someone out. Granted you may get rejected, but I think if you can ask out 1,000 women and get a 100% rejection rate without being a jerk about asking them out, it may make a good book, IMO.
No, some women do not have it easier as they may not have any guys that go up to them as my sister could be an example here of someone who is 41 but has had only 1 date if that even. While we men may have to learn new skills, this is something we did all our lives. Were we born knowing how to walk, talk, drive, operate a telephone, operate a computer, write, do arithmetic, and many other things we take for granted as adults? I think we learned those and some of them may have taken some time but we did it then so why not be able to do it socially? | |
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| Does it never take practice on how to get a girlfriend? do guys know how to talk to women without
Posted: 3/31/2009 2:49:16 PM | | Of course they werent born with these skills. Sure alot will have an answer or even a sarcastic reply..but truth is, if they were born with these skills they wouldnt need to be on a singles site looking for love!! Wether one wants to face it or not, its easier to "mingle" online than it is face to face. Some maybe confidence issues, lack of experience in approaching men/women, whatever reason, but dont let anyone tell you that you should "know" all of that stuff...simply not true. Some have a gift of gab or a very outspoken attitude, which definately helps in meeting people. Best thing to do, be yourself, dont be afraid to say a simple hello with eye contact. Just show interest, if shes got any interest in you...let the sparks begin :) Good Luck finding someone special!! | |
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| Please...
Posted: 3/31/2009 2:53:47 PM | | I'm sorry for my negative attitude and whining, but if you have been single for 21 years and still a virgin, wouldn't you feel frustrated? I'm sorry, my problem is that I have a very hard time being able to tell if a girl is ignoring me because she is not interested, or she is just very busy. When I get rejected, I don't know what I did wrong. | |
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Posted: 3/31/2009 3:21:36 PM | I was in that situation of being single for 21 years, though from birth to puberty shouldn't really count as when in there is one looking for a relationship, and still a virgin and was rather happy about it. Granted that it had taken so long for me to be comfortable in co-ed situations, I did it and had some fun in that.
In getting rejected, you may have done nothing wrong, you know right? It may have nothing to do with you but everything to do with her and unless you want to try to get friends and family to get you all your dates, you have to get out there in social situations and get used to handling things on your own.
Good luck and may you learn what I know that I think you don't quite get yet in terms of how the world works. | |
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Posted: 3/31/2009 3:38:19 PM | | That is why sometimes I wish I was a girl. | |
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| Is there REALLY someone out there for everyone?
Posted: 3/31/2009 4:06:31 PM | Mathematically, the odds overwhelmingly favor pairing up, but that doesn't mean an individual will, not when preferences, attractiveness and a gazillion other factors weigh in. I think you're speaking more of "fate" or "pre-destiny" or "soulmate" stuff, which is complete and utter bunk, but nonetheless inspires one to seek them out. You can certainly feel someone was destined to be with you, and if that gets you through your day, then what does it really matter? But to quietly stand on the sideline, waiting for destiny to arrive, is denying yourself the beauty of doing your own search.
UFG | |
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