| sick of it all
Posted: 3/31/2009 5:03:49 PM | im just having the worst time of luck with girls ive been single for 3 years all 3 is of being stood up called unnattractive or as a rash of people on this side will not like to even talk to me because im black and it has made me bitter and angry my the last relationship i have been in she cheated 15 times on me 1 i knew of and even had the nerve to bring the guy that she finally settled on to my moms funeral and now she is married to him and has a child by him that she made me think was mine so ive been alone for now 3 years and no luck on this site i dunno what im doing wrong maybe im just not meant to have someone and eternally cursed i dunno anymore   | |
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| sick of it all
Posted: 3/31/2009 5:07:47 PM | | I think you might want to consider counseling or therapy if you've been cheated on 15 times, feel bitter and angry and feel eternally cursed. | |
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| sick of it all
Posted: 3/31/2009 5:41:49 PM | | Dude, if you are not comfortable with your race it is definitely a serious issue that I think you have to solve professionally. | |
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| sick of it all
Posted: 3/31/2009 6:17:59 PM | Yep....work on yourself first.
What would you have to offer a woman in the state your in? You're not ready for a relationship yet....a secure women would be able to tell if you are confident and also secure in yourself, right away.
Want a well adjusted relationship? Get well adjusted!
...Oh....and realize that you just can't 'order up' a gal on demand.
("Can't hurry love, sometimes you just have to wait")
Good Luck | |
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| sick of it all
Posted: 3/31/2009 6:25:53 PM | | I agree with the others, you can't expect someone to treat you with respect when you don't respect yourself. Reconsider your habit of "treating women like goddesses" and try treating them as human beings. Remember it's just as important to get your needs met as it is to meet theirs. | |
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| sick of it all
Posted: 3/31/2009 6:35:14 PM | Holy run on sentence Batman!
people on this side will not like to even talk to me because im black
When I was single on this site, I never got hit on either. I must be black.
Reconsider your habit of "treating women like goddesses" and try treating them as human beings. Remember it's just as important to get your needs met as it is to meet theirs.
What she said. | |
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| sick of it all
Posted: 4/2/2009 1:38:32 AM | | If she cheated on you 15 times then it was 14 times to many. you should have moved on the first time...Just because your having no luck on this site.. doesn't mean that there is no one out there for you .. not everyone is gonna meet someone on pof .. And the ones who are calling you unattractive. they are people ...you should certainly not worry about ..Be proud of who you are ... and if there are people who don't wanna talk to you because your black.. then thats there problem certainly not yours ....what we fear we create .. you have to let the past go .. in order to have a better tomorrow. . If you are not happy. and down on yourself. then your not going to attract anyone who wants a relationship..Before anyone else can love you.. you need to love yourself .. If we are happy people. we will attract happy people.. if we are negative people . it will reflect...why we end up being alone.. Everyone has a story..they have either been lied to. cheated on ..abused.. etc.. we are all entiled to one pity party and then we have to move on . feeling sorry for yourself and being bitter is what will keep you alone.. learning to love yourself .. and who you are is .. what eventually will lead to someone else loving you. | |
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| sick of it all
Posted: 4/2/2009 1:42:00 AM | | Work on yourself, work on how you see yourself mentally, and then try. You come off as unhinged ans desperate, two things that anyone would find unattractive; and if they don't then they have problems. | |
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| sick of it all
Posted: 4/2/2009 2:46:47 AM | I feel you man I've been in similar circumstances. (anytime you wanna talk man just shoot me a e-mail) we can trade war stories.
But I know where you are coming from. You were definitely head over heels for this girl and I know how that is she is constantly in your thoughts even when you know you should let go.
You sound like a level headed person don't blame yourself and assume you are doing something wrong because you have run into bad women who have made you feel horrible.
You are not cursed. I have asked myself the exact same questions.
My advice to you is my advice to myself and anyone feeling this way "Take positive control" of the people you put in your life.
Get out to places where positive good people are like the Gym, charitable events, and educational workshops.
What this does is surrounds you with a pool of high quality people from which to choose your next lady friend. | |
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| sick of it all
Posted: 4/2/2009 9:59:22 AM | Yep Blame everybody because your black, that's the problem right there, didn't even think about that  wahhhh wahhhhhhh wahhhhhh, pass me the box or Kleenex, im getting really misty and teary eyed boooo hoooooo hooooooo
Give me a fu*ckin break, its people like you who uses race as a factor, I would assume you're attempting to meet Caucasian or other ethnicity.
If you keep meeting women who cheats, and does nasty things to you and calls you name, maybe its time to reevaluate what it is you're doing and the type of women you're meeting? if you're attempting to go out with Ms.Blondie with nice tata's, legs that stretch from here to Cuba, and has the choices of models to date, well HELLO what did you expect?
Too many of you " nice guys" turns down average looking women, or women a little on the plump side and your excuse, " oh im not attracted to them" but when a " hottie" turns guys like you down , oh its a national catastrophe, conspiracy theories, its because of your race blah blah blah.
Do you see the wambulance going by?
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| sick of it all
Posted: 4/2/2009 11:25:53 AM | | Maybe you're in the wrong city. Blonde bombshells in my area love black guys, and it's pissing off the white folks LOL! | |
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| sick of it all
Posted: 4/2/2009 2:40:53 PM | OP, you can't blame your troubles on race. Should I blame any troubles I have on being a brunette, when I know ALL men love blondes (sarcastic - I'm not really saying ALL men like blondes)?
Why would you allow a woman to cheat on you 15 times? No one deserves this type of treatment. I am sure you loved her, but you were just being a pushover. And she knew it. So she kept treating you bad, knowing you would take it.
You need to work on your self-esteem and confidence before trying to find another woman. Believe me, I have been there. There were years where I really didn't like myself. I would think I'm not pretty enough, have a good enough job, thin enough, etc. I was miserable because the men I dated treated me like crap, cheated, dropped me and never called again, etc. You know what? Finally, I started getting some confidence. So what if I'm not the prettiest woman out there or the thinest. I know my strengths. And what's really weird is men stopped treating me like crap. Why? Because if they did cheat, were rude to me, broke dates, etc., I moved on. I have a good life on my own. The only men allowed in it have to compliment that, not bring me misery.
People would tell me that I needed to gain confidence. I would always say, "How can I gain confidence if no one wants me?". Guess what? You have to want yourself first. You may think this is just blah blah not true, but I can say from experience, when you start thinking something of yourself, it's weird how others do, too. | |
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| sick of it all
Posted: 4/2/2009 4:33:47 PM | Let's start with getting rid of that "dog-kicked-in-the-a$$-attitude." Race has nothing to do with it. As for cheating, well people cheat because their needs are not being met, so some seek whatever they're missing elsewhere. It's quite apparent that your ex-partner has moved on and you're stuck in your past licking your wounds. I agree with others who have recommended seeking counselling & therapy, you need to learn about boundaries & expectations & possibly coping skills. If you continue to believe that you are eternally cursed, then you will be...
**~Remington55~** 
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