| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/18/2009 4:43:24 PM | ok --
what is the current status in society with regards to adult dating sites and intimate encounters... how are they thought of today by women who choose to use them? Are they a good idea or bad... ?
And how do women feel about men who choose to use them? And men, why do you use them? LOL
Curious to know .. as there seem to be gazillions of these sites all over the place...
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/18/2009 4:46:47 PM | oh come on -- this isnt redundant-- cant find any posts on this subject--- I REALLY REALLY REALLY want to know!
Whats your thought or thoughts on this???<img
Does it keep people off the streets-- is it cheaper than hiring someone .. what?
Really thought this might spice up the forum posts a bit!!
src=http://www.plentyoffish.com/smiles/icon_76.gif border=0> | |
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Bluez
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Joined: 4/10/2009
Msg: 3 | |
| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/18/2009 4:50:20 PM | Yes, it is redundant. I did a search on "intimate encounters" and at least 50 threads were displayed... you're not searching.
You're an adult, if you want an intimate encounter, then by all means have one... why do you want to know if they're considered acceptable or not?
Bluez | |
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/18/2009 4:59:18 PM | POF is just as trashy as the rest of them. If you want garbage, meaningless sex, you've found the right place at the right price.
But if you care to pay for it before you "pay for it", then shop around. There are plenty of sex sites out there.
Although I would say that would be unfortunate because your not unattractive. But jeez if you just want sex... Um somebody you know has kids, and they have friends who would be very happy stratching your itch, repeatedly.
If you want something more adult, there are bars, and "singles nites" like POF's. People always looking for sex at those. (If I see another mid 40's guy take home a 20 yr old girl, I will hurrl!!!)   
Best of luck on your quest. You've lived long enough to know what you want and go after it. Who cares what I or anybody else who doesn't know ya thinks. Have your fun, we all deserve to do what we want to make ourselves happy, especially if nobody else will. | |
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/18/2009 5:33:11 PM | You don't need to be on another site to find sex if that's what you seek... heck, according to more than a few women, that's all men want regardless of what category it's been dressed up in. Sex is easy to find.
Regardless of gender, when it comes to online intimate encounters there is an assumption of promiscuity or less than discriminating taste - if you've done it once, you've done it a dozen times. It may or may not be true, but realistically no one wants to feel that they are part of a long list of conquests.
As to IRL/society, there still is a little bit of embarrassment with respect to online dating in general similar to how blind dates and fix ups were once regarded... there must be something wrong with you. Intimate encounters via online hookups, if known, would diminish you in the eyes of many. | |
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/18/2009 6:03:13 PM | And how do women feel about men who choose to use them?
I personally don't care, but if you are on one adult dating site looking for an intimate encounter, then on another for "dating" or claim to want to settle down, I think you are probably a cheeseball or a player (or both). If you are going to do one, then do it 100%
I would not want to date a cheeseball or a player.
For the ones who purposely do not take part in the adult dating sites, I think this greatly adds to their character and worth. I find a man with high moral standards a good catch. Whether or not he has evolved to those standards or has always displayed them are irrelevant.
Nothing worse than getting to know someone intimately and then finding a return text message from their pissed off fiance... or to find out that you do not rank at the same level of honesty and intimacy as you have given to them.
So, I do not care what they feel the need to do, just keep the crap away from me!  | |
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/18/2009 6:04:42 PM | I have no problem with people seeking sex, by whatever means. I do think there is still a stigma more for women than for men--women are not supposed to want to f*ck, they are supposed to want relationships. I do not think men get a social pass on such sites, though--there is still a stigma against the men, too. However, given the POPULARITY of such "adult sites", I'd say there a lot more people availing themselves of intimate encounters than most people think.
My sister will not use online dating, yet she's having trouble meeting a man to date (we're trying to convince her otherwise). So there is a stigma for just plain ole online dating, too. | |
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/18/2009 7:18:05 PM | | She could get on the forums to get her feet wet. You can make friends and email buddies through that as well, even if you don't date. It doesn't suck. | |
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/18/2009 7:43:49 PM | Intimate encounter sites be they on POF or polyamory sites etc, can be safe or unsafe. Depends on the honesty of the men and women. And lets face it if someone wants to boink to boink its not hard to find willing people.
~Beth~ | |
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/18/2009 10:36:36 PM | "How do women feel about men who choose to use them? I don't recall ever letting myself be used and on the very few times I've had sex on the first date, the guy was not using me, we were using each other, so to speak. I don't consider sharing the experience a form of use on either side. Step into the new millennium, woman are allowed to enjoy sex as much as men and we no longer have to expect them to love and marry us after we have sex with them. If a woman feels used, then its because she has hopped in bed with expectations that were not communicated to the man before hand. In this day and age a woman is allowed to let a man know she wants to romp around the bedroom with him and not have to cook and clean for him afterward. You find a guy on line you think is hot, then go for it. Use protection and enjoy yourself, the only person you have to answer to is yourself.
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/19/2009 3:24:51 AM | I've tried a few adult sites myself in the past, when I was just looking for hookups, or a bed buddy instead of an emotional connection, but those sites get depressing after a while. At least, they did for me. Because that's all anyone is on them for really. You're not going to get a relationship out of those sites. They also tend to be horribly expensive.
I think part of the reason I tried them for a while is because I do have some occasional kinky interests sexually, but trying to find a good match on those sites, starting with sexual interests only, is not really a good way to find a match period. You start to realize, that any relationship that starts with sex alone, and nothing else, is not going to last. So I stopped using those sites when it finally dawned on me, that maybe I wanted more with someone then just a sexual match. They aren't really great "dating" sites.
If you however, are just in the mood for a sexual partner and nothing more, sometimes those types of sites are ok for that, but also be extra careful. Adult sites also have sexual predators on them, just like regular dating sites. There's also the STD element to think about because members on adult sites, may have more sex partners overall then "traditional" dating sites. It just really depends on what you are personally looking for. I find adult sites a rip off personally. Way too expensive, compared to most "regular" dating sites. | |
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/19/2009 4:33:09 AM | I have to add my two cents. I was married for 15 years, not a great sex life at all...wanted to discover or learn more about my own sexuality so i could be a better lover with my next relationship. my ex had erectile dsyfunction but it became "my fault" according to him. i found it hard to masturbate without any....stimulation...so i went on an intimate encounters site...and was very surprised at what i found. i found-gasp! regular people, nice guys from all over, that i still chat to, a year later. and it can be very safe to explore-virtually-not even ever meeting someone, but talking to them about sex and learning more about what turns you on.
i have a online texan lover that woos me with his words, and it is enough to get me going and enjoy myself. I have also had some great hook ups -but I take my time evaluating-it doesn't happen on the first meeting or interaction. I still see one young guy-it's been a year-he is passionate, respectful-it's been a year of fun with him. And guess what else? we talk about other things as well!
One of the things that really surprised me when i logged on to the site was the number of younger guys looking for an older woman-looking for the experience and someone comfortable in their own body.
So i would have to say, I have had a great little sexual exploration journey on the adult internet site...and now I am getting ready to look for a long term relationship, cause i know myself better now. | |
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/19/2009 5:24:52 AM | Not sure why the question other than you might be a reporter...its simple and not to mean the people are either....matter of choice with both sexes for many reasons....like you wanting an exclusive..... | |
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/19/2009 7:28:11 AM | | I am on a dating site, looking for a fwb. Its better than picking up some drunken idiot from a bar. Or vice versa (if I have been drinking). Not my thing. | |
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/19/2009 12:55:55 PM | I pretty much expect an intimate encounter or I wouldn't be dating them.
Doesn't matter where I sited them.
lol
bleh, you have to get lucky on the sex sites just like anywhere else..
mostly, they're filled with fat sluts and guys that are homophobes
except for wanting to see two chics do it.
put a profile up for someone's fantasy..
they're basically a waste of money since the free sites have come so far
there really aren't too many people on any dating site that don't long for
some type of intimate encounter
in one way or another
it's the 21st century and we're disgussing sexuality
everyone enjoys sex if they are physically and mentally healthy
but, I ain't payin for it unless she's a 20th century fox
or I'm takin a cab ride through the bronx
which won't be soon
I know to tip the concierge
the good ones can book you a moon
ain't that the verite, pierre?
"you stick your penis in
you pull your penis out
you stick it back in and ya move it all about"
what's so complicated about that?
anyway, don't pay for sex sites..
unless, viewing closeup c0ck pics is whatcha like
I've seen every woman's tits on the internet except for janice jackson's
(I'm still tryin' to block out that image)
if you're looking for an intimate encounter
the same rules apply on the internet as anywhere
just remember one rule of thumb
"some people are too stupid to fvck"
 there's a free scoobie snack | |
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/21/2009 11:18:38 AM | | Many(most?) of the "adult" dating sites are scams, fake profiles, and fake messages sent by the operators to keep guys interested another month. If you think men outnumber women on POF, the sex sites are even worse. I'd bet there are damn few actual women posting on a lot of "adult" dating sites. | |
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/21/2009 11:45:46 AM | It depends on the site and your goals.
I don't think the singles-oriented adult dating sites work too well for single guys, as there won't be many women there - the ratio is horrible. I've never been tempted to use them, even when single. I wouldn't be at all surprised if many profiles and contacts are fake. The operators want to make money, after all.
The swinger-oriented adult sites are designed for couples, primarily. Some single guys get lucky (but rarely, I think), but most single women are virtually certain to get some attention. Single women are by far a minority, but they do exist. The better sites are effective, and the people are real.
Keep in mind that ANY time you get together with someone or a couple for the purpose of sex in or not in a relationship - whether from THIS site or any "adult" site - be careful, and be safe. | |
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/21/2009 12:06:09 PM | Sites such at The Pond here are fine. But when you mix those that are single and those that are in a relationship but seek something more, you do get a little (or alot, depending on the day) of judgment. There are some men and women that are looking for something on side, but wish to bypass alot of that judgement and say Prefer Not To Say, or just flat out lie. It's easier that way for them.
When it comes to women looking for such things (the ones that admit it), there is a large disparity between the genders. One woman puts up a profile about looking for a discreet relationship, or a FWB, and within the hour, they will get the e-mail blizzard with everything from "hey babe, wanna go out" to e-mails with nothing but peener pics. Any man that actually reads what she wrote and responds in kind is buried in the avalanche until she gets frustrated and just mass Unread Deleted everything.
As for the sites themselves. Most will let you join for free, but after that it costs you. | |
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/21/2009 12:20:11 PM | seeker312... I think you hit it right on the head... Most people are judged by what they are looking for. I do it myself when a man contacts me. lol I just finished blocking all 'intimate encounters" and other relationships. To me I see that as someone looking to spice things up a little but not lose what they have already. I have no intentions of ever becoming the "other woman" To me it’s more than what I'm looking for in here.
My friend on the other hand loves the adult sights and even put me on one once thinking I would just love it. What a trip that was. I just about died when she did! Lol I didn’t stay on their for very long and the flood of emails you get were not worth my time answering. So it really depends on what you are looking for.
I still think they need one that says. Friends and Friends with Benefits. To me FWB is just another easy way to get laid over and over again the more friends the better. Everyone interprets status statements differently. Best way is to let everyone do their own thing and if you’re not into it then let them be...and move on back to what you’re comfortable with.
It is no one’s place to cast judgement on someone else because of their sexual interest or perks. It can however play a vital role in deciding if you want to be with someone of that nature or not. This is a dating site so are the adult ones...I have swinger friends that would love to have fun with me.. but because of their lifestyle I can't. Doesnt mean we can't be friends, just means I can't sleep with him. lol
I’m sticking with the pond of plenty it’s more than enough for me.
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/21/2009 2:14:13 PM | | Id like 2 point out that most of the girls on here have judged. and made and opinion on you just because your curiose . there are lots of ways 2 meet men for sex and the internet is just one of them. i prefer it to the bar because you can discuses what you like and what you dont. it makes it easier to satisfy some one and be satisfied if your not nervous about what there into. just use protection and understand the risks involved. women that judge and make you feel bad for wanting sex is the same reason men lie and manipulate situations to benefit them. | |
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vithen
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Joined: 8/26/2007
Msg: 22 | |
| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 4/21/2009 2:25:59 PM | There's always going to be different explanations from both men and women.
What surprised me most is that most people condemn those who are looking for "intimate encounters" whether it be through monogumous or other venues.
I'm in a committed relationship; we are happy with what we have with each other.
But I'd be really immature to believe that what we have, others have.
Face it people, this is a dating site that is more than just a "dating site". People hook up, they have sex, and they never have contact with the individual again.
Once people realize that, hey, that's the way the ball drops, then we'll all be happy.
So if you're out there looking for the "love of your life" (so help you), you'll have to accept the consequences as they fall or at least accept the fact that it's all the other wanted.
It's sad when women (and I know, I speak in generalities as a woman) expect a relationship from an individul (be it a man or a woman) who is only looking to hook up.
Gawd. | |
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 6/30/2009 6:09:12 PM | | Salut, merci pour ton message. En passant, ta photo es tres jolie. Je vais t envoyer une photo de moi en piece jointe. Je suis nouvellement séparé et pour cette raison, je cherche plus une relation ami amant sur une base réguliere avec une jolie fille avec qui j aurais des affinités. Je suis de bel apparence et ai une belle personnalité. Je travail comme travailleur social dans un CLSC et habite a ville lasalle. En passant je n ai pas internet chez moi, donc je te laisse mon no de tel si tu veux m appeler pour jaser et peut etre se rencontrer. A plus xxx 514 770 2181 | |
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| Adult Dating Sites and Intimate Encounters
Posted: 6/30/2009 6:15:25 PM | I think it's none of my business what others decide to do. People do it for all sorts of reasons that run deeper than wanting casual sex, so to generalize...I won't go there. Dig a little deeper into the "why's" and it's not mature.
I don't want a man that uses find-a-f*ck sites anymore than I want a man that sits in a bar in hopes of picking up strange women. | |
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