| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 12:02:23 AM | | I wanted to be a stripper for the longest time... and idea I have now given up because I truly love my boyfriend and he is completely against it. But is there someone out there that date a stripper and or is a stripper and have a balanced relationship? | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 12:07:23 AM |
translationgal :I wanted to be a stripper for the longest time... and idea I have now given up because I truly love my boyfriend and he is completely against it. But is there someone out there that date a stripper and or is a stripper and have a balanced relationship?
Is it the attention you seek? Why not get pleasure from stripping for your boyfriend?
~Beth~ | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 12:32:46 AM | | I would date ( and I shall use the trm date very loosely )you but definately not marry you. Some may be cool with others looking at their womans goods but for me, NO. Dateing a stripper takes a special kinda guy....I Think. | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 1:01:30 AM | | i was engaged to a dancer once, and not long ago. i was not drinking at that time [and still don't] so i didn't like hanging out at the club. She was a heavy drinker. She had a hard time not to while working. I knew she could handle the men. It was a job. Sometimes the money was extremely good, and other times really bad. The trick for the boyfriend is not to "hang out" while she is working. i drove her to work and picked her up and thats how she wanted it. Her drinking eventually dissolved my feelings for her though. We are still commucating today. She has since went to college for her hair cutting ticket, and is totally out of the scene now. In my experience at those places, it takes a special kind of woman to do it and maintain the relationship at home too. | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 1:05:53 AM | I was with and married to a dancer for over 20 wonderful years, that was what she did when we met, and i was secure enough to handle it,i guess that some are not and for those i would not recomend it.
The point i would raise is i don't think it is healthy for any relationship to have either party telling the other they can't do somthing.
just mho
 | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 1:10:32 AM | YES, it is possible, however it takes a hell of a lot of trust in the relationship, and it also takes respect between both people...
If you were already a stripper that is one thing, however if you want to be one and are in a relationship that is a whole different ball game.. I think we may have heard from your BF about this, just a guess, remember a man writing about his GF wanting to do this, and he was upset...
The deal is this, you have to understand the reason you are wanting to do stripping, because men will objectify you... Old men will think they have a chance with a hot young thang and if the money is really good, it is easy to let them give you money so they can ALMOST think they are living in reality....
I have not been a stripper but know some very closely, and know how tough it is to balance life as a stripper...
There is a constant stigma that is ugly and negative, that many gals have to HIDE their job while in a relationship, because some people are that uptight, and think these gals are nothing but whores..
The trick is to show as little, and get the maximum money, that is a LEARNED art, and for some gals the love of money comes with showing a lot of nasty and getting big bucks for that too...
If your BF is completely against it, then you have to just put it in the back of your mind, and let it be... Are you trying to get through college, or is it the allure of men thinking you are sexy and are willing to pay money to see you naked... As I said, first you have to figure out what is drawing you to wanting to be a stripper...
Shug there is a very dark side to stripping, and for some young women getting into it, means getting into all of it, which includes the seduction of drugs, and a little innocent private dance here and there, behind the BF's back...
If you don't have the love of attention or money, then you would be able to stay out of that part of the life style....
Good luck | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 1:59:15 AM | Well... I'm not one to frequent those kinda places, but on the few occaisions that I actually have, I either threw my money, or that of those who coerced me into going- at the most Barbiesque creature I could see slinking around in the darkness.
My suggestion would be not to throw away a happy union with your guy. You must realize that there is huge competition in that industry, and the foxy fishies always win. Especially when they compromise themselves, or are seduced into habits and usages that ultimately result in them compromising themselves.
The gent who mentioned that it takes a very secure man to date/love/marry a dancer/stripper was spot-on. I worked in the limo-biz(contract car with a prolific company) in a very high-end location(no, not Miami, Orlando, Tampa, or Daytona... On the central west coast of said state...) for a number of years, and I know first-hand what he is trying to convey to you. I have had girls in my car crying because of things they had done for money, girls in my car DOING things for money, girls in my car ****ing about what they thought their guy was doing because of what he thought THEY were doing for money, girls crying and ****ing about their guys doing ANYTHING for money.
Money, Money, Money... Ain't worth the heartache it brings. Strip for your man, maybe even his friends... Then fook his silly brains out and kiss him goodnight for the rest of your life. I've seen very few(can't count 'em on one hand) couples who could weather that storm, with all it's temptations and possibilities.
Just my .02 from the outside of that particular life... Support your local MC of choice...
-damoN- | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 2:23:14 AM | | Life being what it is, the millions of choices out there, I would recommend you see a shrink. | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 4:13:08 AM | | Hey, nextthyme, good call. It is tough in the world of women who are single parents, trying to pay for college, or just doing it because they want to. I, myself, never had to do that as a single parent but I can tell you that it has been very hard trying to make ends meet. I found other alternatives like programs that help single moms get back on their feet but there are others out there who choose it as an alternative because there are some dads out there that when they finish with the mom, they finish with their kids. | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 5:24:13 AM | Do what is best for both parties i believe. If your in love with each other then i mean both should be happy with decisions if not your probably not in love to some extent.
Personally i wouldn't want a girl in that scene, so i wouldn't seek or get involved with one, thats just me though. | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 6:27:51 AM | Who has stripping as a lifelong ambition or as something they always wanted to do, very few women.Why are you aiming so low.Do you yearn to be found attractive,is it an ego boost or a self esteem boost.Think carefully , its a job thats seen as tawdry.It associated with extras ie prostitution.People will judge you because of it as being loose, its the way of the world.Its not as glamorous as it is portrayed by TV.In fact it can be quite seedy.Your past should not be something , you are ever embarrassed about or want to hide.
Try belly dancing, way more sexy and no stripping.The thing is to make money and get work, you have to keep pushing the boundaries.Are you prepared to do this.The fantasy and reality are much different.I see you are a student,probably broke, your education is the way to go.When we have self respect we have more confidence and feel at peace with ourselves.Why do so many strippers take drugs or alcohol, to get through the job.Thats very telling.Stay in school, listen to your b/f who has your welfare at heart and use your education instead.Stripping is a young womans job, what happens when you get older and your Cv says past jobs stripper.Think about it,is it worth it for easy money, is your self worth and self respect worth it. | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 7:01:16 AM | If you became a stripper you would make a good "sperm receptical".. But that's about it.
Try going to college or working hard to learn an honest trade.
| |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 7:11:46 AM |
Stripping is a young womans job, what happens when you get older and your Cv says past jobs stripper.Think about it,is it worth it for easy money, is your self worth and self respect worth it.
This is a very valid point. It doesnt matter if you think that there is nothing wrong with dancing naked, your future employers may and this could have very long lasting repercussions. I think it is also important to note that the Op is in Quebec and I believe that strippers in Quebec do full nudity, not the same in many states and other provinces where there isnt full nudity. Op, you also have to remember that many men are going to say go for it, because what man doesnt like the idea of seeing naked women? But, they arent the ones dealing with the potential fall out, they just get the benefit of seeing naked women, so I dont really think that their opinions are very objective.... | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 7:51:21 AM |
Is it the attention you seek? Why not get pleasure from stripping for your boyfriend?
I would assume it's about the money.
A friend of mine was a stripper (I actually knew her as her and not her stripperself, and one day she told me she had been stripping for a few years, what a shock)
She earned enough money ONE summer to fly to Peru and chill out there for the fall/winter without having to work. Sounds good to me. | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 9:34:01 AM | | i've dated strippers in the past and i never had a problem. the key is the guy has to treat you like his lady and not his stripper. | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 1:52:18 PM | "And now ladies and gentlemen....LITTLE EGYPT! She walks, talks, and wiggles on her belly like a reptile.....step right up and see the eighth wonder of the world. Get away kid, ya bother me!" lol  | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 1:57:24 PM | When I was in my twenties, I stripped for a while. Met someone during that time and we had a balanced relationship. Thing is... I should have accepted his proposal and not my Ex's.
Just because you strip doesn't mean you can't have a true relationship. But it does require a person with good communication skills and a desire to have that. | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 1:58:21 PM |
But is there someone out there that date a stripper and or is a stripper and have a balanced relationship?
If you're not street-wise, forget it...
A friend of mine did it... for a while... when she woke up in a strange hotel room, with no idea of how she got there or who she had been with or how many she had been with...., she packed it in... I had to go rescue her as I was the only one she could confide in.... It wasn't a nice day.... | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 2:08:09 PM | I met an ex stripper that was an awesome lady. Cool as sh it. No nonsense type of woman.
The problem is that she was the exemption to the norm. In my bike club for a while a lot of them were going out with strippers. So I got to meet many of them, and they were really fvcked up, jaded, burn out. Because they spend most of the day being stared by men and the more they wiggle the more cash they can extract from men, many learn to see men as creatures to be used. Many no longer find men attractive and start doing it with other women. Eventually many end up doing so many drugs is ridiculous.
There are exceptions to the rule of course. But if you have an exhibitionist side, well go for it. | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 5:52:46 PM | I did it last year, I really wanted to experience it, and the money was Great,
But I could not do it for more than a few weeks; it made me feel like a piece of meat and We have to act all the time, make guys feel we like them when we are really repulsed by them. To be able to handle this most girls get drunk, or even use drugs. The girls lie about everything all day long, change our names, our ages, our lifes, everything. You don’t have to be young to do it. One of the girls at the club was 42, decent shape and said she was 25,,, in my case if the guy was older than 40 I would tell him I am 23,, if it was a younger then I would tell him I was 19.
 | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 6:31:50 PM | If I weren't so fat, and had at least a small amount of coordination, I'd be a stripper. Good money, etc etc.
But I wouldn't risk a relationship just to fulfill that dream. | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/21/2009 9:40:26 PM | | I would say that if he is completely against it then, you doing it, isn't going to be good for you relationship. | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/23/2009 3:18:30 PM | But what would be wrong with a Christian Bride learning how to be a stripper for her husband only?
I mean one can always learn from films or learn in a group thing as those who take Belly Dancing lessons.
I'd rather my future husband watch me be his personal stripper as his bride than pay some low-life Biblically defined Harlot to tease him and take away family cash! | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/23/2009 3:37:40 PM | Some of you amaze me. Really do. Why does being a stripper equate to a whore? I say do it if both parties have trust and respect for each other.
I knew some people who stripped while in college. One has a degree from an Ivy school. She still does strip. Her bf is ok with it. Everything she earns, she invests so the whole what happens when you are old and wrinkly sh!t don't work with that. She is smart.
Couple other ladies, stopped stripping after college. Now have normal jobs. None of them were whore, who bang every guy that walk thru the door of the joint.
Some wait tables and some strip. It is a business. How is it different then a waitress flirting with customers to get a big tip? Yeah I know one is nekkid the other clothed. I am still waiting..... | |
|
| Stripping and relationship....
Posted: 4/23/2009 4:29:46 PM | | Just wanting to specify that I have completely given up the idea because I would not want to risk a relationship on this. But that judgment on the line of work of strippers is not the strippers fault but the society's fault... welcome to prejudices: that's what society is all about isn't it? But what I really want to know is those success stories... thanks for those who did share them! | |
|
Home
login 
