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 CLBlueEyes
Joined: 3/26/2009
Msg: 1
Single woman trying to meet a good manPage 1 of 1    
How does a single woman meet men? My dilemma is living in a state (not where I grew up) and all my friends are couples.

I work full-time, and go to school during my 'off' hours. I do realize my time is limited but I do make sure I have time to have some fun.

I don't feel safe going out to the bars on my own and quite honestly would prefer not to meet a man a bar. My girlfriends all have a boyfriend/husband and kids. Obviously they are not going out to meet men.

Besides online dating - which has it's own issues - what's a girl to do?
 nexthyme
Joined: 9/12/2007
Msg: 2
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Single woman trying to meet a good man
Posted: 4/24/2009 1:39:29 PM
I met my guy off of here...

HOWEVER, if you have little time, then you really have little time to put the effort into meeting guys beyond the quick fix, which is at a bar...

Some people meet at church, or church groups for singles.. Met my ex spouse that way, ummmm can't say I would try that approach again simply because in single church groups there is a huge push to couple up... THAT is how some bad marriages happen...

Hobby groups where both mean and women go... It sounds like you don't exactly have the time...

As I said, I met my guy, and a LTR off of on line, and it worked ok for me... Sure there were dud dates, and BS, but the variety is very large when it comes to on line...

Good luck
 UnexpectedError
Joined: 2/8/2009
Msg: 3
Single woman trying to meet a good man
Posted: 4/24/2009 2:10:09 PM
OP, I've got the same problem, but completely reversed. Single guy at a 90% male school, all friends are equally single, etc. Online dating has been about as successful as any given invasion of Russia (i.e., a total disaster). Ok, the bar thing is the same. My "type" wouldn't be at a bar either.

Someone recommended I try speed-dating, and after doing a little research it seems like a good idea. Unfortunately, my area appears to be devoid of such events. Maybe you'll have better luck.

Other than that, people are always suggesting looking for local hobby groups on meetup.com; again, low participation in my area, but you could take a look anyway (it's free, unless you want to start a group). I know for a fact that there tend to be a lot of singles groups on there specifically for your age group (more so than mine, anyway).

Good luck.
 Abbicci
Joined: 11/17/2008
Msg: 4
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Single woman trying to meet a good man
Posted: 4/24/2009 2:51:34 PM
If you have time, try a few classes/lectures at local museums. An investing class, a movie lecture series, spring is here look for some nature walk groups. Most areas have some type of singles group that organize meet and greets and speed dating. Check library and supermarket community boards for something that catches your interest. Go to have fun, go to enjoy yourself and you just might meet a nice guy in the process. Just get the hell out of the house. Put on some girl clothes, be fun and positive and you will be surprised at how easy it can be to meet people. Make new fiends and maybe find a great guy or maybe even a single girlfriend to go to events with.

And let EVERYONE you call a friend know you are looking to date. I am finding blind dates are a bit of fun and all of my friends seem to know at least one great single guy they can't wait to introduce me to.

Anything that interests you might lead you to meeting a man with the same interests.
 ikilledsourpus
Joined: 4/18/2009
Msg: 5
Single woman trying to meet a good man
Posted: 4/24/2009 2:56:55 PM
I just re-located to where I currently reside about 6 months ago. I made it a point to walk anywhere I needed to go (I live in an urban/college neighborhood). By constantly putting myself out there, I started to get approached by a lot of people.
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 6
Single woman trying to meet a good man
Posted: 4/24/2009 3:20:20 PM
Online dating is the set course of action for someone especially in your position.

Have your couple-friends come out to the bar with you. If you're sitting with a couple, and guys see you "mall watching", and you're not constantly chattering with them (make sure they're close to each other and a separation between you and them), guys may make a move. Go up and put money on the pool table and sit near it with your couple-friends too. Or sit at the bar with them (sit on HER side), and have open body language.

Also what you can do is befriend some single women, too. Find a bar buddy would also help! :)
 artist_48
Joined: 1/27/2009
Msg: 7
Single woman trying to meet a good man
Posted: 4/24/2009 3:32:46 PM
i could face the same issues living near a very small town, but i do not allow it to hinder me from meeting people.
get actively involved in things that you enjoy. the local chamber of commerce has listings of organizaations in your area.
attend fundraisers for/ in your area.
go to local events.
have a girls nite out with a few of the married girlfriends.
network with friends to enlarge your circle of friends, both male and female.
attend church if you are spiritual.
i can keep going---

google '10 most popular places to meet men'
 macromorgan
Joined: 11/26/2005
Msg: 8
Single woman trying to meet a good man
Posted: 4/24/2009 3:50:06 PM
Generally speaking your best bet is to just go out with your friends as often as you can. Maybe you meet a random stranger while y'all are hanging out or maybe you find one of their friends is interesting and you'd like to pursue it. Aside from that I don't know what to tell you as I'm pretty much in the same dilemma.
 celts123
Joined: 5/15/2008
Msg: 9
Single woman trying to meet a good man
Posted: 4/24/2009 3:52:16 PM
Join some social clubs in your area. Or hang out with some of your married friends. Perhaps they might know someone that could potentially be a good match for you.
 Willys Wild Wheaties
Joined: 5/21/2008
Msg: 10
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Single woman trying to meet a good man
Posted: 4/24/2009 4:28:59 PM
There's people everywhere...Seems simple but talk to them if they dont have wedding rings Probably about the same crapshoot to ask them out to coffee as people here
 Telenochek
Joined: 1/1/2009
Msg: 11
Single woman trying to meet a good man
Posted: 4/24/2009 5:29:12 PM


How does a single woman meet men?


OMG, you're kidding right?

Here is the general way:
a) Think of a type of man you would like to meet: engineer, teacher/professor, stock-broker, carpenter, artist, doctor, firefighter, banker, homeless activist etc... Make a long list of professions that you are ok with and not ok with.

b) Once you have this list, think of anybody you know: your friends, acquaintances, family or anybody else who might know someone working in these professions (even if they are married etc...) and ask them to slip a word that a nice lady is looking for a good man. Ask them to pass it on....

Wait for your man to inquire :)

Social clubs? Please, please, a vast majority of men do not participate in these (depends on the type of social club, of course

However, here is a shortcut for nice women who are under 33 years old:
i) Walk into a graduate school department of ECE, CSE, MAE, Structural Eng. etc and announce that you need a boyfriend. You will get multiple applications the same day.
 mynamesnotjesus
Joined: 2/26/2009
Msg: 12
Single woman trying to meet a good man
Posted: 4/24/2009 7:39:55 PM

How does a single woman meet men?

Walk up to one of the elusive creatures and say hello.


My dilemma is living in a state (not where I grew up) and all my friends are couples.

Don't date your friends then.


I work full-time, and go to school during my 'off' hours.

And there are no men at either place? Anywhere?


I don't feel safe going out to the bars on my own and quite honestly would prefer not to meet a man a bar.

Don't go to bars then.


Besides online dating - which has it's own issues - what's a girl to do?

Too bad they don't hand out relationships at the DMV. Seriously, I always find this question amusing. Tons of people have asked this on the forums.
Men aren't hiding from you. There's a few billion running around the planet right at this moment.

In reality what you are asking is "Where is a place that is secure and set up to filter singles that I would be attracted to, and have the power to choose or decline without consequence or needing social skills, available on my schedule, that are guaranteed to be a successful relationship?"

Or you are asking "How do I get over myself and show someone I need a romantic partner in my life, without having to show I need anyone?"

So really, IMO, it's a matter of deciding what you want. Do you want a relationship handed to you? Or do you want to work on your own confidence and insecurity to be able to talk to strangers?
 Yelaw0lf
Joined: 8/27/2008
Msg: 13
Single woman trying to meet a good man
Posted: 4/24/2009 8:15:59 PM
if you want to meet people and not use this site, easily go to a bar, or go for a run in a populated area, ull get them!
 pizzic2
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 14
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Single woman trying to meet a good man
Posted: 4/24/2009 8:54:22 PM
Hi!

I looked at your profile, go with your interests, try wine tastings, going to single's functions through area churches, singles groups etc.

Also, try other venues like exercise, hiking activities and sports where there are like minded individulas into some of your interests, singles cruises, museums, concerts, or where there is any social functions and gatherings, through friends/relatives etc.

Good Luck,
Joyce
 USAF Bonilla
Joined: 2/7/2009
Msg: 15
Single woman trying to meet a good man
Posted: 4/24/2009 8:59:55 PM
well i dont know much but i think i have my balls shot off in iraq along with my leg, cus i dont have any when it comes to approaching women cus i dont knwo any cheesy pick up lines, thats why im on here and as it is i only get older cougar women that jsut want one thing and im sorry kim catrall aint sexy, but find out what guys are into personally i dont go to bars and i do dj so once in a while i go to a club but i met some cute girls paintballing, snowboarding, at the race track
 psylence1
Joined: 4/12/2009
Msg: 16
Single woman trying to meet a good man
Posted: 4/24/2009 9:14:27 PM
This reminds me of that Seinfeld routine where he's talking about women saying "where are all the men" to which Seinfeld says "WE'RE EVERYWHERE. Wherever you are we have a representative on the scene!"

I agree with some of the other suggestions though. Find something you're interested in and take a class. Join a gym, get your pilots license, volunteer somewhere, whatever. Chances are there will be at least one guy doing the same thing and at the very least you've got whatever you're doing in common. But again, as Seinfeld so eloquently pointed out we're everywhere. We go grocery shopping, we pick stuff up at Target, we walk our dogs, we grab steaks at the butcher shop, we catch a baseball game now and then, we have a beer at the bar, some of us don't have kids but we might take our nieces/nephews to the zoo, we may be at the bookstore, we may be behind the register at your coffee shop, or volunteering at the animal shelter...you get the idea.
 Joyful_Smiles
Joined: 4/21/2009
Msg: 17
Single woman trying to meet a good man
Posted: 4/24/2009 9:55:10 PM
Oh Lordy, sweetie . . . wait until you're my age, living in a town noted for liberal/ unchurched folk, and you're a conservative/Christian. LOL I could 'find a man' every night of the week, merely by being online. And must admit I did do that a few years ago after my divorce. It was great fun racking up the dates night after night. That gets old fast if you're not a player by nature. So finding one that shares my values, hasn't let himself go, and isn't looking for a young trophy - now there's the challenge! I date less, have expanded my friendships more . . . spend lots of time with my girlfriends most of whom are married, but love to get out and do things with me. Sure, it would be nice to find a guy for that 'last great love of my life.' But then I'd have to start sharing the remote again!! There's no easy answer . . . if there was we wouldn't all be here. One day when you least expect it . . . that seems to be the way. Good luck
 BrainsAndBrawn
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 18
Single woman trying to meet a good man
Posted: 4/25/2009 8:38:13 AM
1. Wear a pink top and reveal as much as possible without actually exposing.
2. Park your car by the side of the road and put the hood up.
3. Once a guy arrives, tell him you can't get your car to work, and see if he'll try to start it for you.

It'll work of course, leaving you to say "thankyou" and ask him for his number. Don't do this more than once or twice!
 Chronomancer
Joined: 2/22/2009
Msg: 19
Single woman trying to meet a good man
Posted: 4/25/2009 8:43:18 AM
Would probably be best to not go out with your pet croc while you're lookin for friends. You can meet a man anywhere, well one who is bold enough to approach ya. Speed Dating, Art Fairs, and a jazz club or two should be kosher.
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