Pikka
| | Joined: 10/26/2008
Msg: 1 | |
| | Have you ever gotten something you really wanted? Page 1 of 1 | What brought this up is my son wants a Mac. I’m a PC person (yup, I read that thread) and for a variety of reasons, I want to get him a PC. I won’t list them because what I want to discuss is all about getting what you want.
I am wondering if giving him what he wants will change his beliefs about how life works. If it would let him know you can get what you want when you ask for it and give him a sense of having the best, not just something that will do the job. Kind of like the magic of Christmas when you are a kid and Santa gets you something you dreamed of but never could believe you’d get.
Personally, I almost wish I could be satisfied by buying something. I want the intangibles, the feelings, the things that have no cash price.
So, my questions for you:
Have you ever gotten something you really wanted?
Did it change your outlook on life?
Is there something you dream of getting now that would change your life?
What is it and how do you think it would change your life? | |
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| Have you ever gotten something you really wanted?
Posted: 5/17/2009 1:46:24 PM | When I was a kid I did get exactly what I wanted for Christmas sometimes. I do not think that that should count though; as Christmas is supposed to be a "magical" time when you are a kid 
I don't think that getting what you want every once in a while can change an persons outlook on life. I don't know about always or never ever getting what you want though, I think that would have more of an impact.
yes there are things I dream of getting that would definitely change my life... the odds of winning the 49 million on Wednesday are pretty astronomical though 
I say buy the kid his Mac!! It could be a learning experience for you both, and it is amazing how fast kids pick up new technology. He may already have some experience with one from school/friends etc.
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| Have you ever gotten something you really wanted?
Posted: 5/17/2009 1:56:36 PM |
I am wondering if giving him what he wants will change his beliefs about how life works.
It depends under the circumstances. What if your son presented you with some solid analysis of why the Mac suited his needs better than a PC? Would rewarding him for his effort in proving its value not be a good thing (effort+time = results)? Where-as not rewarding it may result in the mindset that no matter the effort, the result is never favourable, so why try?
By having him go ahead and really prove the value of one item over another he will learn more about it and be better ready to use the machine, and less likely to regret the choice (whichever way he chooses).
Personally, all the material toys I have wanted and got, I have had to work hard to get. I do massive amounts of research for the hobbies I have, and want to ensure I get the best value for my effort. This extends to less material things, like learning a skill. I know that the harder and smarter I work towards a goal, the more capable I am of achieving it. When I do achieve a goal, I feel the reward of satisfaction, and generally, cherish the toys or skills I have gained more then those items that just drop in my lap. | |
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| Have you ever gotten something you really wanted?
Posted: 5/17/2009 5:17:11 PM | I really wanted a divorce and I got it and yes it really did change my life!
It wasn't the first time I had gotten something I really wanted, but I tend not to want for material things. I have had promotions at my work that I really wanted, but I worked hard for those and wasn't afraid to say I wanted a certain position when it came available.
In the end I truly do think we reap what we sow. | |
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| Have you ever gotten something you really wanted?
Posted: 5/17/2009 5:25:21 PM | So, my questions for you:
Have you ever gotten something you really wanted?
Yes. Growing up, I got a lot of what I wanted. And by "wanted", I mean REALLY wanted. Some examples: I got the horse I rode for lessons when she came up for sale ($500). I got the knee-high boots when I was 15 that I wanted for Christmas. Total surprise. Parents couldn't afford them but they went on sale right before Christmas. I got some of the toys I really wanted growing up (a kitten that purred and waved it's paws when you touched it's nose, a game boy, and an N64). Later in life I got the computer I wanted, then a lap top. Recently I got the TV I wanted, the camera I wanted, and the car I wanted (although these 3 I am paying my parents back for).
Did it change your outlook on life?
Not really. There was a lot I didn't get. I never really had "new" clothes until I was about 17. They were always hand-me-downs from relatives or from Value Village. There were some things I had to earn; my second ear piercings had me cleaning the whole house the night before I got them until 11:30 p.m. even after my parents were asleep. I had to earn a few of the video games I wanted. And, when Pizza Hut had a 'kids eat free' Tuesday night thing when I was, I think 7, I had to learn all the provinces of Canada AND their capitals and recite them at random. I don't think it changed my outlook except now that maybe when I don't get something that I feel I worked really hard for, or when I work really hard for something and then something comes up (like an $800 brake job that I could have paid my credit card off with), I get rather upset. But I don't think it's changed my outlook on life.
Is there something you dream of getting now that would change your life?
Yes.
What is it and how do you think it would change your life?
My parents' immortality. The fact that they'll be gone one day makes me tear up whenever I think about it. If they could live forever, that would change my life in that I'd never have to go through the pain of picking up the phone to call them and then realize that they won't answer b/c they can't. Or the pain of not making chocolate chip cookies with mom anymore. Or having a play fight with her. Or listening to dad go on and on about horses and cowboys. Or have him tell me he's proud of me. You're making me cry! | |
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| Have you ever gotten something you really wanted?
Posted: 5/17/2009 6:31:08 PM | LOL.... I rarely get what I want!
funny thing this thread... I was shopping today with my girls for a birthday present for my middle daughter.... something special from Birks.... a tradition I started with the eldest....there was a ring she tried on...too big.....but you know what?.... it was perfect for me...an...for once I did something selfish... spontaneous....and bought the ring for myself....it was not a life changing purchase...but today....not sure why... I just wanted it 'Cos'...ya... Cos......Cos was a good enough reason for today...Cos I liked it and I really liked it. Cos I was worth it.
My parents spoiled us as children...always buying us pricey toys that they expected us to use an excel at.... ie) the total darkroom I got cos I was taking beginners photography....Oy... you don't buy a 14 year old a darkroom!
The guitar...cos I was taking guitar lessons....Oy...another bad purchase...wrong guitar!
it went on and on...and we never really appreciated these things cos we never wanted them to start with...never asked for them...never wished for them.
I know I love my old Pentax SLR....ya a digital would be nice...but I love my old Pentax... I saved up for it back in 1988 and I still use it a lot. Things I really want... I use and I enjoy...and yes they bring me some happiness...so ya... that is important... maybe not life changing for you...but happiness is important to me. | |
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| Have you ever gotten something you really wanted?
Posted: 5/17/2009 6:59:44 PM | Agreed 100% on the fact that WesternWildRose APPRECIATED the Pentax because she saved for it. She had a hand in the process of attaining it. That's what makes it all worthwhile.
I remember my son purchasing his first used guitar with his paper route money, because he really wanted it. It was a huge step for him.... he worked for it, bought it, and still plays it.....an incredible satisfaction and sense of accomplishment for him....I was very proud, so yeah, in hindsight, I think working for/attaining something you really want is much more satisfying than just "getting" something......long winded but there it is.....    | |
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Pikka
| | Joined: 10/26/2008
Msg: 10 | |
| Have you ever gotten something you really wanted?
Posted: 5/17/2009 7:39:40 PM | Balled Eagle: Yes, it includes buying what you want with your own money. As adults, I think that is mostly how we get our wishes fulfilled, by ourselves. It doesn’t usually have the same magic as when you are a kid, but I have had times when what I wanted or needed was provided for me, in a mystical way, and it feels GREAT!
Yabbdab: I probably will buy him his Mac. He does have them at school and his friend has one.
Mungo: Good idea, he has already presented me with all the reasons a Mac is better and alternates to my every excuse because he knows that is the best way to sway my thinking.
I agree that researching what you want is good. My favourite things I researched before buying and I still love them.
Halo Kitty: Great response….I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you cry. I’ve lost both my parents, the house I helped build and a lot of the things I’d acquired when I was married. I survived it, I still miss my parents, sometimes I miss my old house but I now I don’t worry so much about loss. I’ve found freedom in this knowledge.
Rockondon: good for you!! | |
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| Have you ever gotten something you really wanted?
Posted: 5/17/2009 7:44:23 PM | By having him go ahead and really prove the value of one item over another he will learn more about it and be better ready to use the machine, and less likely to regret the choice (whichever way he chooses).
Mungo Zen makes some good points. I had this same dilemma with my son a few years ago........we had already decided he needed a new computer. He wanted a Mac and convinced his dad and I why that was a better choice for him, so a Mac is what he got and he's still happy with it.
Personally, I've never felt a strong need for material things (unless there is sentimental value to it) and have always loved shopping second-hand. I broke that rule just last week, when I bought myself a brand new bike......never done anything like that in my life. Once I got pass the guilt, I was as excited as a kid on Christmas morn. | |
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| Have you ever gotten something you really wanted?
Posted: 5/17/2009 8:42:12 PM | OP, my boys had to stay late at school, some nights 'til 9 pm, to finish projects because they couldn't do them on our home PC. Or I had to drive them to their cousins' house to use the MAC there on weekends when the school was closed. I'm a PC person but wished I had bought a MAC for them during their school years.
"Have you ever gotten something you really wanted?" Well my youngest son just did. He has always had hand-me-down furniture in his bedroom but we recently moved & he decided to buy all new furniture for his new room since he had outgrown his twin bed, & the rest of his mismatched furniture was pretty much toast. He's wanted new furniture for many years now but has been diligently saving for college.
In planning for when he's finished college & has his own place, he bought a queen bed, bookcase, some black accessories to match & a stand/desk for his computer & TV, both of which he bought over a year ago with money saved from his after-school job. I have noticed that both my boys take impeccable care of anything they have bought with their own money but sometimes undervalue things that are given to them, with the exception of electronics.
I'm still waiting to get what I really want.  | |
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| Have you ever gotten something you really wanted?
Posted: 5/18/2009 9:36:00 PM | isn't that what life is about ? wanting something so badly that u r willing to work hard for it to become available to u and that it would have a significant impact on ur life?
to answer ur question OP it's yes many times and each one that I made something happen it made a significant impact on me and my psyche. To put that thought out there, to wish for something and make it happen.
For me it was having my wish to have only daughters not sons which i got.
A job in chosen profession after a major significant job loss... was able to rebuild my psyche, my reputation and still working at the job.
Many friends and some special ones that took a bit of pursuasion to have things go my way............... | |
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