| too long single
Posted: 5/17/2009 4:40:31 PM | been single now for a year and a half and its well pissing me off. i mean i know that you need time to get over someone and such but i am. my ex is gone and moved on getting married and having another baby in that time and all that but ive been ready to move on for almost a year now and ive had nothing with no one.
i mean who do you think has the easiest time with finding someone, the girl or the guy???
where the hell has it gone wrong!!!!
i feel mentally castrated sometimes lol.
i talk to lasses i like, i find it easy to get on with them only to find it turns into the whole friends thing where they trust you but only want to talk about the guys they like and how to get them advice.
so frustrating!!! | |
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| too long single
Posted: 5/17/2009 6:45:40 PM | | There are a lot of us single girls out here who really want to be in a long term relationship, who have the same problem getting a guy to commit. No, its not easy finding someone, and it is frustrating. You just have to keep believing you will find that special someone. | |
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| too long single
Posted: 5/17/2009 6:54:13 PM | ....... rOOkie
Try six years ....... then make your post  | |
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| too long single
Posted: 5/17/2009 7:38:04 PM | YES, I'VE BEEN SINGLE WAY TOO LONG.WILL NOT SETTLE FOR ANY MAN,JUST TO SAY ATLEAST I HAVE A MAN NO NO .TOO MANY WOMEN CHOSE TO MAKE THAT MISTAKE.
Many older women are single but not to their choosing. As we get older many changes fall in our paths, but that does't mean throw in the towel so to speak.We know what me want,wiser, has set goals, much to offer or bring to the table and all you guys want , is to have fun. use pride over being who you really are and what you are as a man. yes, i agree single life is for thebirds.WHAT CAN WE DO DIFFERENT AND BETTER,THAN WE'VE ALREADY DOING? I AM AT A POINT IN MY LIFE. NO TIME FOR GAMES.I WILL NOT BEAT MY CHARACTER TO SCRUBS AND LOST SELF RESPECT JUST TO FIND LIARES AND DECIETFULNESS....YOU YOUNGER GAL ..STAY SINGLE ..SETTLING FOR ANY THING LESS THAN WHAT YOU WANT. YOU ARE SPECIAL AND YOU DESERVE MR, RIGHT, GOLD FINGERS, CANDYMAN . TAKE YOU PICK.
MiMA TILLAK | |
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| too long single
Posted: 5/17/2009 8:17:00 PM | Being in or out of a relationship is no real indicator of long term happiness.
Being a friend for yourself, will bring considerable reward.
For males and females relationships involve compromise, the ratio of give and take is never ever going to be seen as equal, simply because we are human.
I very much celebrated my 10th freedom anniversary last year - every day where I am in control of my life and happiness - my freedom to smile and pursue a quality of life is a constant source of relief.
There is no such thing as "too long single" what we waste too much of our lives doing is pining for something that isn't there. Decide instead to fully appreciate what "is" there, make no prison bars of any kind - stretch out and live.
Needing to have an accessory hanging of your arm is no more than an ego statement.
Screwing does not necessarily lead to intimacy or companionship, marriage and other empty screw arrangements can be very lonely and miserable places to be that leave your health needlessly compromised. Decide to be FREE. | |
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| too long single
Posted: 5/17/2009 9:29:58 PM | I have been single for 5 years and I have just gotten used to it. And to be honest I kinda like it that way
Sure sometimes I get lonely, but I get over that a lot faster than a bad relationship.
I do believe we all find someone when we are not really looking, That has been true for me and the relationships were all of 10 years or more, Keeping a relationship alive is my problem.
But Im learning, and the next one will be better
Dont worry, someone will come your way and you will be glad you waited instead of just going after the next one | |
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| too long single
Posted: 5/17/2009 10:15:18 PM | well there sir.... I completely understand how you feel.... as well as the points others have made. For me its... been about 2 years or so... and yeah I've met some girls in which the intentions where to see where it goes...and outta the blue.. you're the friend... IT DOES SUck... and is VERy discouraging.... (as well as girls wanting more from me when I wasn't ready yet for a relationship)
But as someone once told me... to find yourself assuming and even moreso... giving into that pattern... kinda puts you there before it even is that... Doesn't mean it may not become that... We can only be ourselves... and good or bad... if who you're interested in decides that is not enought for something more that just friendship.... well. .. so be it... All long as you know you put yourself into, with the effort and communication of letting them know... how you feel or where you would like to head... then thats all that matter... it's still crappy though, when you like someone and it doesn't work out....
Oppurtunity is all around us... and when one grabs ya... If you really feel drawn to them... put you best foot foward... thats all we can do...
Gotta also be mindful of the fact that even though you may be mentally prepared for another relationship... despite how she me seem... she may not be... or may not even know wot it is she really wants.... but eh... Truth be told... being someones rebound always has bad written all over it...
All I'm saying is ... I feel your frustration....  ... It helps to know you're not the only one that feels like that - as long as you have solace whithin yourself... it will eventually happen.... well... that is the plan... (so I tell myself) | |
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| too long single
Posted: 5/17/2009 11:28:13 PM | | Man, don't look for it. Love will look for you. It's been over a year for myself also. Best thing to do is not look for love and just do your thing. Than one day you'll meet a girl and never know it. It hits you randomly. Try to stay positive. I have my moments too and complain to friends (who are not single) all the time. Stick it out. | |
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| too long single
Posted: 5/18/2009 12:48:21 PM | Babe, I have been single for four years, and it has been the best thing in the world for me. I have found out that I like spending time alone. I have a lot of friends that I go out with.
I go out on planned adventures with my singles group at church and we have a great time. That is really the best place to meet nice people. I am not recommending you do what I do, it's not for everyone. Just find a group of people who share your interests and get out there.
You'll meet someone great when you are not looking.
If you are tire of dating well, I have been reading a book called "I kissed dating goodbye" and it makes so much more sense than what I've done in the past. I know most men could never give up dating but if you do you'll have the opportunity of getting to know someone for who they really are and not for who they pretend to be when on a date. And let's face it most people put on a show when they are trying to hook you.
I have met some really nice people and some of them I might not have thought of as dating material until I got to know them better. It's really interesting to watch how people change in different situations.
Good luck. | |
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| too long single
Posted: 5/18/2009 12:56:38 PM | A year and a half? Really? Try 8 years, 3 months, 3 weeks and 4 days my friend. Then Complain.
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| too long single
Posted: 5/18/2009 1:18:20 PM | I've been single 5yrs!!! Hate it but had my confidence crushed sooooooooooooooo many times now not sure i can do it all again. I know i'm not some skinny, gorgeous, beautiful, jaw dropping girl like some woman but i am still a girl who has needs and emotions. Only today on here i got another smack in the mouth!! I've been talking to a guy for a few weeks, just friends but a good laugh. He asked for a pic after feeding me the line .................................i'm not shallow, looks are not important! What happen next???? Nothing! Jack xxxx No replies now nothing. funny that. Looks obviously do matter. I can't change the way i look!!!
So fed up with all this. maybe some people are meant to be on their own. Always thought that by 40 i would be settled and happy!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh well only 10 months to go. Come on george clooney, come find me lol i wish x | |
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| too long single
Posted: 5/18/2009 2:39:24 PM | I've been single 5 years and I don't consider it too long. Heck, if I can avoid the drama that I see going on around here, I'll gladly stay single a whole lot longer...I really don't like drama
TRJ, sounds like you have this "should" thing happening when it comes to timing in relationships, a symptom that I have always found very interesting among single peeps. It seems there is some internal clock that people have telling them that they should NOW have met someone and fallen in love.
I don't know where that idea comes from because it's completely false...but maybe there is a valuable series of lessons for you in becoming these girls friends...
I think way too many are motivated by fear of "being alone" the rest of their lives...well...that fear rarely is ever true...and in your case, I heavily doubt it's true.
You're a good looking young man who'll find that special someone when it happens...in the meantime, smile, be happy and enjoy your friendships....it'll make you that much more attractive. | |
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| too long single
Posted: 5/18/2009 4:35:15 PM | | For the longest time I never understood why they say its better not go looking for love, for many years, i have been burned in the past but now i completely understood that theory... The last two bf were a disaster and completely mismatched... I've learned a great deal but never ever will try to look for love again... I rather keep myself happy being single than be in a stressful, miserable relationship. | |
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| too long single
Posted: 5/18/2009 7:59:45 PM | | hmmm, let's see....you've only been alone for a year and a half and you're mad because your ex moved on with her life? hun, don't let that bother you...just because you're not dating anyone right now doesn't mean that you're dead. there are plenty of women out there that might love to be with you, enjoy your company....don't punish yourself, don't stand in the corner...go out, have a good time, meet new people, and stop looking....let your love find you. you might be looking at her friend but in all reality the one you're avoiding may be the one for you. you're too young to be punishing yourself. hell, a lot of us has been alone for 3+ years (i've been separated for 6+, alone for not quite 4 of those years) and you don't see me hanging myself.........you also don't see others hanging themselves either. | |
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| too long single
Posted: 5/19/2009 5:36:16 PM | I have been single 20 year,s and i,m fine you will be to, if u have to have someone get out there and get it, | |
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| too long single
Posted: 5/19/2009 5:39:53 PM | | As you can see theres people who have been single a lot longer than you, and we're ok with it. Just calm down and stop trying so hard or you'll start looking desperate, and nothing turns someone off faster than desperation. | |
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| too long single
Posted: 5/19/2009 10:16:08 PM | I've been single too now for the same period of time as you, OP. It's all right. Somehow, it's no longer the be-all end all of my life.
Not when I filled my life with purpose and meaning. You can go through life thinking the way to find happiness is finding a partner or a lover. But the truth is, happiness is there inside you if you just release it and share it with others. Love shared is love that isn't lost.
It's not something you find outside of you, but inside. And it is only up to us to decide how full our well is at all times. It can be limitless or it can be dry. | |
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| too long single
Posted: 5/20/2009 4:57:20 AM | I've been on my own for nearly 4 years now and for a time, I wanted to be with someone, and since I have not found anyone at this late date, I have made my own life. - And it wasn't for lack of trying. After all the drama, games, and bullshit out here in the dating pond, I walked away from it, and probably won't return.
At this point, I am on a wonderful bowling league, participate in a book club, and volunteer at a beautiful museum. - How great is that? I go out with my friends for dinner, etc and have a good time. I am learning that being on my own isn't a bad thing.
But do I get lonely at times? Sure, like any normal person, yes I do, but I just keep plodding on and remind myself I would much rather be lonely because I was alone versus lonely because I was in a relationship that was not working. - Been there and done it and I certainly don't deserve to go down that road again. | |
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| too long single
Posted: 5/20/2009 5:53:16 AM | | Dude; that's nothing - I've been single / divorced for 6 years and I can find all the action I want, but I can't find a woman with MORALS and self respect. These over 40 honeys are banging everybody and are not 'really' looking for long term - no matter what they say. What ever happened to a good gal that enjoys doing laundry, cooking, and being a house-mouse ( LOL ) | |
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| too long single
Posted: 5/20/2009 1:30:08 PM | | got you beat, ron9. i haven't been involved with someone for 7 years and counting. but it hasn't been all bad. i'd rather be alone than to stay in dissatisfying relationships. | |
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| too long single
Posted: 8/22/2009 6:33:17 PM | just wanted to say thanks to you guys guess ive figured out what my greatest fear is due to this post and thats being alone for good. every single one of you guys have actually helped. very greatful to you guys. gues the human condition sucks sometime dont it lol.
thanks dude, if any you guys wanna stay hello please do | |
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| too long single
Posted: 8/22/2009 7:28:12 PM | | Haha dude I've been single my whole life aside from a few 1-2 week relationships and one 4 month. And I'm 30, I know I'm a great guy but like most guys have noticed women go for the wrong type(player/badboys etc) it doesn't bother me as much as it used to though. Work on making yourself happy, if you don't/didn't enrol in college, join a fitness club, etc. Work on yourself. I'm not saying that will bring the women but hell, I'd rather be totally alone than deal with someone who has no respect for me. | |
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| too long single
Posted: 8/22/2009 8:14:27 PM | dude ur lucky
i have been single my whole life
no one on heres giving me a chance either
i dont know what to do | |
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| too long single
Posted: 8/22/2009 9:22:35 PM |
Try six years ....... then make your post
No kidding! 
A year and a half is nothing. | |
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| too long single
Posted: 8/22/2009 11:30:32 PM | i talk to lasses i like, i find it easy to get on with them only to find it turns into the whole friends thing where they trust you but only want to talk about the guys they like and how to get them advice.
man im going through the same thing,you just are trying to hard man an its wearn you out man,just relax enjoy life all u can do | |
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