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 Aquariusdoll
Joined: 9/19/2007
Msg: 1
How often do you call the people you date?Page 1 of 1    
Guys and girls, when you're dating someone, how often do you call them? Why? What if you have a busy lifestyle? How long is too long to not call?

Just wondering everyone's opinions on this. I personally don't like to do the calling. In the beginning of a relationship I call maybe once or twice a week. I think a week without him calling is too long, it makes me feel that he's just not into me anymore.
 135BPM
Joined: 3/29/2009
Msg: 2
How often do you call the people you date?
Posted: 5/19/2009 8:15:50 PM
I don't really want to bother them...so if I was dating someone...I'd call maybe 1-2x a week just to say hello. There's no right or wrong amount of time to be on the phone...if its a good convo...it will just flow. If there's a lot of dead silence...someone will eventually end the call. I've easily talked on the phone for an hour or two.
 niceguysfl86
Joined: 4/23/2009
Msg: 3
How often do you call the people you date?
Posted: 5/19/2009 8:16:26 PM
I'd agree a week is too long... I personally don't mind having a conversation every day... but everyone's a little different I guess.... If you want to talk more then tell him to talk more!
 Lily0923
Joined: 5/28/2008
Msg: 4
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How often do you call the people you date?
Posted: 5/19/2009 8:20:33 PM
Depends on the person, I've dated ppl whom I've talked to on a daily, I've also dated ppl I've only talked to once in awhile.... You have to feel the mood of the relationship.
 blindstar77
Joined: 4/16/2009
Msg: 5
How often do you call the people you date?
Posted: 5/19/2009 8:23:31 PM
It all depends on how much the guy loathes the phone.

Personally I'd rather throw mine across the room than have to talk on it for an hour, let alone two. However, a good in-person talk is always welcome!

I think the most important thing, for a guy, is to not call him unless you actually have something to say. Some guys like sitting on the phone for hours talking about nothing, most I know don't. The only caveat to this is if you only call once or twice a week and then that's a "hey, how have you been" call.
 farceur
Joined: 5/3/2009
Msg: 6
How often do you call the people you date?
Posted: 5/19/2009 8:48:30 PM
Every fifteen minutes unless I'm asleep. Too much? I don't think so. The minutes are free.

In terms of the entire span of infinity, our human life is such a very tiny bit of time that each second is precious beyond measure. I would not want to let any of it go to waste. As love is our highest purpose, constantly calling to lavish her with adulation is the right thing to do. Begin each call with, "Remember me?, or, "Guess who!", and sign off with, "Don't forget me!"
 intelxual
Joined: 4/16/2009
Msg: 7
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How often do you call the people you date?
Posted: 5/19/2009 9:23:02 PM
I personally LOVE to talk so I like to get a call everyday, even if nothing more to hear that persons voice before I go to bed. It feels good to know someone is thinking of you. I will easily stay on the phone for 2-3 hours, and have stayed on the phone as long as 18 hours with a gf.
 azholysmoke
Joined: 3/1/2009
Msg: 8
How often do you call the people you date?
Posted: 5/19/2009 9:28:02 PM

Guys and girls, when you're dating someone, how often do you call them? Why? What if you have a busy lifestyle? How long is too long to not call?


First of all it depends how long people have been dating. Early in a relationship probably at a couple of times a week. Would not go more than a week between calls.

Think sometime folks call too frequently (2+ times a day) not to mention the e-mails and texting. Showing an interest is one thing...becoming over bearing is totally different.

Dating is not the same as a relationship. And if the later is what you are seeking one must learn to respect the other person's space.

Be careful not to use calling as way of testing how interested they are in you. You could end up pushing them away.

IMO
 sweetgal29
Joined: 11/20/2008
Msg: 9
How often do you call the people you date?
Posted: 5/19/2009 9:42:55 PM
if ur casual dating, its usually whenever one person wants to get together...maybe like once every week or 2.....but if ur dating someone that has potential for a relationship...then maybe every 2 days...it should usually flow naturally when you feel like discussing and sharing more abt ur life.
 usaywhat54
Joined: 2/6/2009
Msg: 10
How often do you call the people you date?
Posted: 5/19/2009 9:58:43 PM
Are you just talking about calling YOUR guy, or just guys you're dating in general? Every person has his own preferences, palettes, beliefs, definitions of intimacy, and so on. Unless they've met the guy, no one can really say for sure how often is too much.

Having said that, I personally like a good phone conversation 3-5 times a week spaced out relatively evenly. An occasional 2-minute "just saying hello" is welcome any day, as long as it's not interfering with daily life. I know I wouldn't want to be distracted when I'm working on something, especially since I'm not allowed to have my phone out at work IN THE FIRST PLACE.

When it comes down to it, just be smart and considerate of his schedule, and say what you really mean. Find that ever-important balance and you'll do fine.
 Neta05
Joined: 4/27/2009
Msg: 11
How often do you call the people you date?
Posted: 5/19/2009 9:59:10 PM
it trully depends on the connection within the two people, if both parties have a busy life then yea 2-3 times a week is perfect because it shows that they're thinking about you, but it works both ways so you have to make the call also, on the other hand even if both scheduals are always busy but there is a strong connection and you like talking to one another there will always be time
 saxy88
Joined: 3/8/2009
Msg: 12
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How often do you call the people you date?
Posted: 5/19/2009 10:35:43 PM
Since a lot of women feel that calling too often makes you seem desperate, I try to not call them unless I have a good reason to and want to see them (1-3 times a week, depending on how the week is)...until of course, we are dating or communicating steadily, and she knows me well enough to know I'm not "desperate", and that I just enjoy conversation.

There are guys who actually enjoy conversations, ladies, so don't always assume it's out of desperation!

=)
 mynamesnotjesus
Joined: 2/26/2009
Msg: 13
How often do you call the people you date?
Posted: 5/19/2009 11:15:23 PM

how often do you call them?

When I have a specific purpose for calling them. Such as realizing I would like to see them again, and have figured out what I would like to do that they may enjoy. Then I call to see if they would like to do it, or work together to figure something else out.


Why?

Because I want to see them and learn more about them, and not to inconsiderately use them to pass away my free time chatting?


What if you have a busy lifestyle?

I don't start dating new people around tax time. Other than that I make time. If I want a social life then I have to make arrangements to give it the proper attention, plus a little extra for Justin Case.


How long is too long to not call?

More than a week. Unless they have kids. If they have kids (and shared custody) I call more towards the weekend they don't have the kids.

Then again, I am single. So maybe I am doing everything wrong. Can you really trust a singles site advice on the proper way to date?
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 14
How often do you call the people you date?
Posted: 5/19/2009 11:16:27 PM
If you only called me once or twice a week, I'd assume you aren't all that interested in talking to me so I doubt that I'd call you more often than a couple of times a week.
 itsmillertime6227
Joined: 9/19/2008
Msg: 15
How often do you call the people you date?
Posted: 5/19/2009 11:22:38 PM
Depends on how long we've been dating. If it's still at the point where we are not officially together I'll call every couple of days or text them. If it's been going on a while then I'll talk to them everyday. I really don't have a problem talking to them everyday b/c that lets me get to know them better and to see if I'm wasting my time or not.
 PoeticSam
Joined: 3/10/2009
Msg: 16
How often do you call the people you date?
Posted: 5/19/2009 11:36:34 PM
It depends on the scenario. With my ex, we used to call each other at least 3 times a day and our schedules were really busy. (mine still is, that's why she broke up with me)
 InsomniMac
Joined: 12/23/2007
Msg: 17
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How often do you call the people you date?
Posted: 5/20/2009 12:41:41 AM
Not often.

I used to think it was a good idea to talk everyday, but usually I think calling when you have something to say is best. It really depends on the relationship though. The people, how busy their lives are....

The truth is if you want someone to call more, or less, you need to communicate it. "I need space", "you need to connect with me more, I really like hearing from you."

Make it small, respect the other persons needs and don't make a rule of it. If you want to call him, don't wait, call him right then, talk for 15, then, even if you don't need to, tell him you're letting him go - you just wanted to hear his voice.

Short, quaint, to the point. The trick is getting off. After a while I find its easy to lull oneself into thinking that having long conversations every single time you talk has some sort of meaning to it - you'll end up circling doing that.

Really, no one can tell and you'll never really know. Do what feels right in the moment. Make assumptions, take risks.
 trailgirl
Joined: 7/1/2008
Msg: 18
How often do you call the people you date?
Posted: 5/20/2009 12:48:24 AM
Do people actually call anymore? Seems everyone's trying the text or email instead.
But then, in today's economic climate, work always takes precedence so a date or phone call isn't always easy, while the above two are.
 fordaforums
Joined: 5/16/2009
Msg: 19
How often do you call the people you date?
Posted: 5/20/2009 1:24:27 AM
Everyone is different. You jsut have to find what works for the both of you. I cant stand talking on the phone, but a 5 minute chat once a day, and a few texts is perfect for me. I much rather see them in person.
 celts123
Joined: 5/15/2008
Msg: 20
How often do you call the people you date?
Posted: 5/20/2009 6:39:49 AM
I don't have any set rules. It would depend on how busy I am, how serious the relationship is, the other person's preferred method etc.
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