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Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Girl  > Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?      Home login  
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 Anythyme
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 1
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Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?Page 1 of 1    
Why would my ex repeatedly tell me that she loves me and misses me and wants us to be together and then the next day says that it was Drunk talk and don't read into it. This has happened repeatedly in the last month..!!
 Blueskies123
Joined: 11/3/2006
Msg: 2
Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 5:25:14 AM
My guess would be that perhaps it wasn't all that long since you split and she's not quite over the split yet.
She has one drink too many.
She also is one of those folk who will call/text when they have had one too many.
If the next day she says she doesn't mean it and it was drunk talk then just take that as it is.
You could block her number if it's bothering you.
Or..just don't read anything into it when she contacts you.
 Lori922
Joined: 5/29/2008
Msg: 3
Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 5:38:57 AM
Perhaps your ex needs to stop drinking so much.

But, if she does indeed say these things while under the influence, the saying goes...

Drunk minds speak sober hearts

So, sounds like she is telling the truth, perhaps..... but is embarrassed when you do not reciprocate the feelings????
 bklynrebel
Joined: 11/30/2008
Msg: 4
Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 5:49:33 AM
I would suggest that you ignore what she says when she's drunk. Personally, I do not want to deal with drunk people.
 tina7578
Joined: 2/2/2009
Msg: 5
Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 6:23:08 AM
I'd say it's time to stop answering her phone calls, especially the drunk ones, which, isn't that hard to figure out which is which since drunk dials usually occur later in the evening.

A lot of people when they drink get emotional and wishy-washy, and most get a little nostalgic, so more than likely, she's this type and maybe once she gets a little liquid courage in her, she decides she's going to call you and tell you how she feels, then regrets it the next day. It's not all that uncommon but it is annoying, which is why I suggest it's time to stop taking her calls all together.
 Anythyme
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 6
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Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 7:36:20 AM
We split up last summer. I still love her, but can't live like this!!!! It is like having your heart broken over and over again.
 *~*ChardyGirl*~*
Joined: 6/29/2007
Msg: 7
Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 7:40:07 AM
Op,just tell her you're on POF looking for a new girlfriend................

That should be a big enough wake-up call for her !



Messages this short,bla bla bla.........
~~~~~~~~`~~~~~`~~`~~`

*Edit*.......just read that you still love her......??
What are you doing on HERE then.......?
 afashionlady
Joined: 4/19/2008
Msg: 8
Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 7:42:48 AM
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

You wanna be the guy that no woman will date cause we can't be your ex? Go for it. You'll be even more dateless than you might be now cause we won't touch you with a 10ft pole.

Stop taking her calls
Let the feelings go---it's been almost a year
If she loved you she'd be back in your life
If you love yourself you'd realize you're being played for a fool--sooooooooooo not attractive to the next woman who will happen upon your picked over carcass.

Next time she calls, don't answer. I had a potential dating partner drunk dial me at almost 3 this morning. I think he should consider himself lucky I didn't hear the phone...when I called back and left a message this morning, it wasn't very pleasant and left no room for another call back. If you must call, do it the next day and be clear that you won't be talking to her again.
 Abbicci
Joined: 11/17/2008
Msg: 9
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Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 7:43:07 AM
Stop answering her calls. Especially the drunk dialing ones.
She isn't running hot and cold she is running drunk and sober.
 Anythyme
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 10
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Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 7:54:08 AM
I should have said that I still care about her very much..I have known this woman since I was 12, but she just came back into my life. She was my best friends older sister in highschool.
 LemmonJuice
Joined: 6/22/2008
Msg: 11
Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 7:55:09 AM
Because women are crazy!

Seriously...when she is out drinking and lonely, the next best thing is better than nothing. Sorry to say it, but it's true.

By the way...men do this too!

Good luck. You deserve to find a woman that wants you when she is drunk AND when she is sober.
 afashionlady
Joined: 4/19/2008
Msg: 12
Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 7:59:28 AM

I should have said that I still care about her very much..I have known this woman since I was 12, but she just came back into my life. She was my best friends older sister in highschool.


Baby that makes no difference at ALL. Just cause you care a lot doesn't mean anything to her.

Let it go. Or you'll be self-flagellating for years to come. Do you really want to spend 10 years wondering what if about the woman who is saying to you "who cares"?
 Bellydanza
Joined: 11/25/2007
Msg: 13
Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 8:07:43 AM
You know I seem to have a story for every question, i would guess a lot of us do.

But last night I saw a guy who I have this thing for. For some reason I just think he's so hot, and attractive. But he's a total player, has slept with so many women at the club where i dance. He charms them, lies about his name and ethnicity, and of course goes for the larger ones, or the not so attractive ones, drunk ones, the easy prey so to speak. He and I had our own run in once, before I knew his game. Nothing about him is good, nor spectacular, plus he smokes. Yet I just can't forget him, or stop myself from staring at him when I see him, even though I knew he's just dirt beneath my feet. I once told him he could have me, someone who respects him for who he truly is, and his culture...but he chooses the easy way out over a relationship.

Now so i see this guy again last night....and then i go home and dream about him.

well thank God I don't drink, and that I lost his number long ago. Because I'd be calling too probably. There's always that ONE person we know is no good for us. But under the right circumstances, we just pine for that person. Could be lonliness, could be deseperation, horniness, whatever.....most of us have made those knowingly stupid middle of the night calls to an ex, or someone we really like who won't give us the time of day.

If she's not saying it when she's sober, there is nothing you can do. She may still harbor those feelings for you, but when she's sober, she has better control over them and knows you're not the one for her.
 BBW2Love
Joined: 5/2/2009
Msg: 14
Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 8:36:29 AM
It sounds like a drinking problem.

When drunk she phones and cries all over you. I want you! I want you!

She doesn't have this problem when she is sober.

In the light of day, she thinks, I don't want him. What was I thinking?

She is not blowing hot and cold. If she was you would be getting the come here/go away drunk or sober.

There would not be this obvious dichotomy.

Hold out for someone who wants to be with you when they are sober, OP.

BLOCK HER NUMBER.
 hunnylookin121
Joined: 6/28/2005
Msg: 15
Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 8:42:28 AM
I think she pretty much told you the answer. Everyone wants to be with someone when they get drunk. Shes just not strong enuff to not drunk dial is all.
 Hush!
Joined: 4/17/2009
Msg: 16
Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 9:32:18 AM
Sounds like she doesn't meet any guys, feels lonely and decides to call. When she's drunk she will only think about the good old times and feel sorry for herself. If I was you I would talk to her one more time when she is sober about why she calls you when she is drunk and if there really aren't any feelings for you anymore. If she still says she doesn't want to be with you totally ignore you. Best block her number or get a new number. Sorry, that's cruel, but if you still like her it will always hurt you when she calls. Good luck!
 forums1
Joined: 5/14/2007
Msg: 17
Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 9:41:26 AM
You're letting her tear you apart over this - my best advice, get callerID if you don't have it, stop taking her calls...

Been there, done that - don't play into it. If someone wants you, they won't play "cold fish" with you when they are sober.
 *Meer Kat*
Joined: 3/11/2009
Msg: 18
Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 11:17:53 AM
She's hot and cold. Cold when hungover, sober .... hot when drunk.

 Worbug
Joined: 4/23/2009
Msg: 19
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Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 12:12:42 PM
What most people say when they are drunk is most likely more the true presona than anything else they say. When they are drunk, common sense, judgmnet, and inhibitions are out the window. The vault is opened. They normaly keep these thoughts to them selves sober. Not all people, some people are open all the time no matter what.
 Anythyme
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 20
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Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 5:38:57 PM
Those were my thoughts totally.
 Lori922
Joined: 5/29/2008
Msg: 21
Why are women hot one minute and cold the next?
Posted: 5/24/2009 5:52:25 PM
^^^ Yeah? Well, I said it first in post # 3 so give me some credit, man!
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