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 Lady678
Joined: 6/4/2006
Msg: 1
Invite to home means yes to sex??Page 1 of 1    
Ok guys, why if a woman you've met recently lets you know she just wants to date & wait for sex. She then invites you to her house to hang out. Do ya'll assume this is a greenlight to go for it, even though she has said she would say no to sex beforehand? Do ya'll see this as mixed signals ? if so why?
 bklynrebel
Joined: 11/30/2008
Msg: 2
Invite to home means yes to sex??
Posted: 5/26/2009 12:26:51 PM
I know you "asked a guy" but I always have an opinion. Someone else posted a similar thread. Personally, if I am not ready for intimacy with a man, I will not invite him to my home. It's that simple. I don't want to give the appearance of "mixed signals", it's just too complicated and I am too tired to deal with that.
 blowmydoorsoff
Joined: 3/19/2009
Msg: 3
Invite to home means yes to sex??
Posted: 5/26/2009 12:28:39 PM
What ?!?!

Ummm if Im getting anything like what your trying to say. The answer iz simple, guys think practically everything, iz a green light for sex.

For example: Theorhetical scenario. U just met some guy. Assuming of course, that U are ****able on hiz standards scale. Or he's drunk.

You: Ummm hi
Guy: Hello there ( he's ready to have sex with U, if U let him. )
 Lady678
Joined: 6/4/2006
Msg: 4
Invite to home means yes to sex??
Posted: 5/26/2009 12:30:59 PM
I know the other post is what prompted my question. Why would it be mixed signals? I say what I mean, I would not sit close to him or lead him on, why couldn't I invite a guy over for a BBQ and to hang out , without it meaning yes to sex?
 Bk2
Joined: 4/23/2006
Msg: 5
Invite to home means yes to sex??
Posted: 5/26/2009 12:31:28 PM
Hi Lady...

No -Final answer.

Wishing you the best.

O:)
 ççç™
Joined: 4/21/2009
Msg: 6
Invite to home means yes to sex??
Posted: 5/26/2009 12:35:53 PM
No, not always.
Depends on where we are, how many dates, how long we have been seeing/talking to each other.

My experience ; Women usually offer to cook on forth or fifth date. And that's the green light for sex.
She has 3-4 dates, enough time to make up her mind about me, then if it's a go, she invites me to her place. I've never had "WTF!" reaction when I made a move, ever.
 oldskool67
Joined: 10/11/2007
Msg: 7
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Invite to home means yes to sex??
Posted: 5/26/2009 12:37:41 PM
depends on what personality type you invite.

wimpy, clingy, needy, doormat type guy = bbq, scrabble, and maybe a kiss on the cheek.

confident, take charge, type A, stable guy = bbq, naked twister, and eggs benedict in the morning.

figure out who you are dealing with before you offer the invite.
 Greyfeld
Joined: 1/11/2007
Msg: 8
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Invite to home means yes to sex??
Posted: 5/26/2009 12:38:58 PM

I know the other post is what prompted my question. Why would it be mixed signals? I say what I mean, I would not sit close to him or lead him on, why couldn't I invite a guy over for a BBQ and to hang out , without it meaning yes to sex?


It really depends. Your body language, your tone, and the premise under which you invite him over all make an impact on said guy's expectations for when you invite him to your place.

That being said, don't let these other guys kid you, nearly every human with a brain and a penis would hope that getting into your place would lead to something, if even just a little playing around. That doesn't mean that all guys are ridiculously perverted, it just means that 99% of the male population is deeply tied with their baser instincts/desires.

However, you're old enough to know that if any guy is flooring the gas and you're not comfortable with it, it's up to you to put the breaks on before it goes too far.
 jakeya99
Joined: 5/9/2008
Msg: 9
Invite to home means yes to sex??
Posted: 5/26/2009 12:39:47 PM
If a girl is comfortable to have a dude in her house so early on... and it's nice and private with a bed within walking distance... a guy will give it a try anyway. He figures you really like him to have him in your house. After all, he was a complete stranger not too long ago.

I would say don't have him in your house until you know him.
 FunkyMonkee
Joined: 4/7/2009
Msg: 10
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Invite to home means yes to sex??
Posted: 5/26/2009 12:41:25 PM
It is always a green light.. they just don't necessarly know it yet.

A sensitive man will know what to and interpret the signals. just make sure you put out the right ones.... Having Barry White on and the bedroom door ajar might not be the best approach if a roll in satin isnt on offer.

if you stoke up his fire too much he may not be able to control himself....
 kickingfate
Joined: 9/10/2005
Msg: 11
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Invite to home means yes to sex??
Posted: 5/26/2009 12:44:27 PM
I never assume it means sex being invited to a womans house, the same goes with she shouldn't assume if i invite her. It definitely means i am comfortable with that person or she is comfortable with me. Then again i must say its been a rare occasion when the invite is presented that we didn't end up having sex anyways, but i never expect it by any means.
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 12
Invite to home means yes to sex??
Posted: 5/26/2009 12:46:46 PM
I don't see it as anything in particular. I'd play it by ear, but that's true regardless.
 farceur
Joined: 5/3/2009
Msg: 13
Invite to home means yes to sex??
Posted: 5/26/2009 12:53:38 PM
It's just another place to not have sex yet. The mixed signal could happen if your house is decorated with lots of erotic art, your dildo is left out on the nightstand, and your coffee table is obviously constructed to do double duty as a platform for bondage. It's hard to keep your mind on things when the environment is overtly sexual. A typically mundane decorating scheme would not present a problem.
 justwant2no
Joined: 11/14/2007
Msg: 14
Invite to home means yes to sex??
Posted: 5/26/2009 1:01:07 PM
Op, let me ask you - if a man invited you to HIS place, would you think he was thinking of sex? Think like a man, they do. If in his mind, my place = sex, it's safe to assume in his mind her place = sex. That's why you have to speak slowly and clearly. Perhaps you could clarify like: "It's such a nice time of year to cook out, why don't you come to my place for d-i-n-n-e-r. Maybe then, we could go out after d-i-n-n-e-r." That way he might actually think he's coming over for dinner?
 *Cowboy*
Joined: 4/28/2006
Msg: 15
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Invite to home means yes to sex??
Posted: 5/26/2009 1:07:15 PM

Perhaps you could clarify like: "It's such a nice time of year to cook out, why don't you come to my place for d-i-n-n-e-r. Maybe then, we could go out after d-i-n-n-e-r." That way he might actually think he's coming over for dinner


Nah he is just gonna think that she is D-I-N-N-E-R.

LOL

Cowboy
 Brian1342
Joined: 4/22/2009
Msg: 16
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Invite to home means yes to sex??
Posted: 5/26/2009 1:14:32 PM
I don't know, if a woman invites me back to her place at a bar, then yes she wants sex - I might be too stupid to realize it at the time, but yes. If you went out on a date and date #2 ends up at her place I usually play it by ear. Litereally I listen for things like her asking me in via "do you want to come in for coffee, night cap" = sex. However if she gives me the nickle tour and skips the bedroom = probably not. If she invites me in and kicks on a movie = a body language, eye's have it, play it by best guess type deal. If you help her unload her groceries/shoppage/etc, and offers up a soda = probably not unless she just comes out and invites you to have sex (let's go to the bedroom, etc).

I've actually been scared off by an overly agreessive woman (we were just friends, why did your hands dip below the shelf on our friendly good night hug?). I've been ambushed for a make-out session twice (I really behave myself on the first dates). I usually just stick to my guidelines - try not to have sex on the first date, don't try for more than a kiss or two on the 2nd date, let her start/indicate the first hand holding session but always later after having sex with her, the rest of the dates just see what happens, and if you have a good rapor with the woman she usually doesn't have an issue broaching a timeline for the first night of passion ("if you keep this up you might get lucky/spend the night" = next 2-4 dates the signs are good).

I usually don't want to have sex with you if I don't like you, not comfy with you, or think it is a bit early and don't want to ruin such a good start. I just can't bring myself to become a man-ho.
 justwant2no
Joined: 11/14/2007
Msg: 17
Invite to home means yes to sex??
Posted: 5/26/2009 1:19:53 PM

Nah he is just gonna think that she is D-I-N-N-E-R.

touche.
 artist_48
Joined: 1/27/2009
Msg: 18
Invite to home means yes to sex??
Posted: 5/26/2009 1:39:25 PM
the men in this forum continually cheer me up!

look at the answers to this question and you'll see a great range of the men (their

personalities) represented online. i love it!

from CCC and OLDSKOOL'S humor and wit

and PALTALK's comment's: good stuff

to BRIAN's conservative manner.

you guy's are great fun, as well as informative. Just a shout out to the guys!
 bear4uhoney69
Joined: 4/22/2009
Msg: 19
Invite to home means yes to sex??
Posted: 5/26/2009 2:13:05 PM
No it does not mean sex!!!! I have had a FRIST date with a few women AT THEIR HOME and we did not have sex and we have never to this day had sex because we just did not click. Even tho I let them know that I enjoy eatin them more than havinf sex we still just didnt click. I enjoy sex a lot bbbuuuttt if we do not click then there is no use in trying to have sex. Some times if she wants to have you over AND she does not tell you why that still is no GREEN LIGHT to have sex. I met one in B.R. and she let me meet her at her home, she was living along and I gave her a LOT of ways to say YES to SEX but she just was not ready for a relationship of that kind. We still talk but I do not think we will EVER have sex cause she does not want that she just want compaionship. Most women now if they have been with out a man for 5 plus years they just do not want sex and sometimes it does send mix signals.
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