| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/4/2009 8:44:42 AM | Hi!
Ok, so maybe the issue isn't with the men, maybe it's with me...but I need some advice. I'm Cuban American and I've moved to Sydney. Since I've been here I've had quite a different experience with men. I've only met one from this site and the other three have been through friends or at social gatherings. All of these encounters with men have been short lived...and this is why I need insight.
Where I'm from, Miami, men are usually open and forthcoming. Here it seems like men don't know what they want. One minute they're calling me and the next they aren't. I'm not over analyzing and I'm not some teenager who's looking for attention 24/7.
I just need to hear from Australian men - In the dating world in Australia, are things done differently? It feels like it's a little game, something I'm not used to..and quite frankly, I don't like it.
Thoughts would be great! I've never posted on a forum in my life but I guess I'm hopeless and I need further insight.
Thanks for reading! | |
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/4/2009 9:06:13 AM | How long have you been here? I'm sure there are huge cultural differences between your average Cuban American and an average Anglo Aussie. Might take a while to sort things out.
When you do, let me know coz I don't get Aussie men either. They're all weirdos if you ask me.  | |
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/4/2009 9:09:56 AM | Not a man, sorry...no I am not lol...but...they have no idea about the art of polite flirting...I so miss the european men. Here mostly if you do that they misconstrue it as easy...sheesh...and then they get peeved if they find the door was never truly open. Also a fair amount are intimidated by women with style. I do not wear makeup, dress classic and it amuses me the amount of times I am called glamorous...DO WOT? I wish. As for sensually sexy women can scare the bejasus outa most.
There is an insecurity here with their roles as men. It's macho and stud and not well educated (proud of it too)(i.e. no sense of sensuality and emotional intimacy thats for poofs and we hate them) or its educated wimps and poofters and often the women do not help.
Also there is the archetypal relationship here..read some short stories and see a few b class Aussie movies to get a jist of what the modern woman is up against. The myths of rough, hard, do or die men is valid for the first few generations because it was bloody hard but unfortunately the stories we can tell our sons are moving SOOSOOOOOO slowly. Thank your lucky stars you are in a city....the outback can be frightening prudish, judgemental and women seriously huddle at one end of the party whilst the men go out to the shed.
Okay huge generalisations here but DEAL WITH IT. I love this country and not all men are like this but rub their polish hard and it is rare to find a diamond most are tinnies, sport, and thongs underneath the PC veneer especially in a crowd. Note that I am only recalling from my observations of my generation and the youngesters are better however parents part shape kids. It will take time and not all is bad, there is an honesty and lack of reverence that is refreshing and I whole heartedly embrace.
also you must have heard this joke..whats the definition of australian foreplay? "You awake Sheila? Roll over!" | |
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/4/2009 2:21:07 PM | Hola buenas dias OP, welcome to your first post and thread! Poster #3 is correct on so many levels, I forgot I was a bloke! But while most of the descriptions are fairly spot on, there might be another factor to consider.
Could it be that the OP is sending mixed messages to begin with? Noting the fact that us Aussie blokes can be stoic at times, added that the OP does not want a long term relationship nor friendship then the only option left is dating, which is exactly what the OP wanted according to her stipulations on her profile, no? And dating to most of us mean, calling (sometimes), going out (sometimes), and generally when it is mutually convenient. When one becomes sacrificial and prioritising 'the date', then to my mind, that is not dating anymore...that's a level slightly above.
I'd argue that the OP got what she asked for, but perhaps does not recognise it in the Australian context? If we're going to stereotype, an American with a latin bent would be loud and passionate and can be awesome in certain doses but overwhelming for large doses....hence a somewhat controlled self-administering dosage for the 'datees', I imagine. That is if we are stereotyping....ignore if we're not. | |
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/4/2009 2:35:18 PM | | You are judging Aussie men from the four you have met so far?.There are millions of us here so just be patient.Seems to me you have only met insecure youngsters.Thanks also for opening the gate for another man bashing thread, should be interesting. | |
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/4/2009 5:30:28 PM | I had no idea there were men in sydney, now i find there are cuban americans there also.
what next ...mexican staring frogs from southern sri-lanka instead of our native cane toads.
I've been to both places (eastern USA) and find the scene's exactly the same. | |
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/4/2009 6:19:37 PM | OP I tend to agree with you. Even though I'm an Australian woman I have corresponded with both Australian and American men on this site and I can say most definitely that the Americans are way more open and honest about what they are looking for.
Let's just say if I didn't have shared custody of my children I would move to the US already........... | |
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/4/2009 6:46:54 PM | | your problem is that australian men are socially retarded,look at the way we brits treat women,with class and respect,make them feel like the queens that they are,ossie men just conjure up images of sheilas,beer ,crocs and trying to prove their masculinity,so very sad.if your heart desires love and compatability you're in the wrong country! | |
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/4/2009 7:13:02 PM | You say potato and I say spud. What some think is open and forthcoming is in your face and intrusive to others.
Maybe you scared them in the "next" minute or maybe our friend oldfrit is right and you just got a couple of retards.
You sound quite reasonable and funloving so you're better off without these timid drongoes anyway, just means you haven't found any of the good ones yet. | |
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/4/2009 7:31:18 PM | Aww leave them, alone...they are OK in small doses.
But.......
look at the way we brits treat women,
You are sh1tting me right??
Take an Aussie bloke and multiply all his faults by 10 and there you have a British bloke.....plus you get the added bonus of him being pasty white and wearing socks with his sandals.
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/4/2009 8:08:24 PM | Poster #9, I can't say I agree with the idea that British men treat women better than Aussie men do, but this...
australian men are socially retarded is 100% accurate. You are expressing the same thing I always say, that 'all men are pooheads', but are using grown up big boy words. | |
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/4/2009 10:00:30 PM |
your problem is that australian men are socially retarded,look at the way we brits treat women,with class and respect,make them feel like the queens that they are,ossie men just conjure up images of sheilas,beer ,crocs and trying to prove their masculinity,so very sad.if your heart desires love and compatability you're in the wrong country!
man we are so going to smash you dumb poms in the ashes!! and mate when we think of sheilas funnily enough we think of british blokes 
and as for wanting to prove our masculinity, you couldn't be more wrong! if you and i were in the same place right now i would take you outside for a good ol' fashioned thrashing.
as for OP - talk to us at 2am in the middle of a pub and you will find we are as open as any other nationality on the planet. if other blokes at more "regular" hours are quieter it's only cos we are shy and retiring. oh yeah and socially retarded. | |
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/4/2009 10:23:46 PM | Hey all, thanks so much for posting....
Some more information:
-I love men, all men, I wouldn't want anyone to think otherwise...I'm just looking for insight
-I've dated British men....and again, would hate to overgeneralize, but they are more socially retarded than the Aussies
-I'm a smart woman and I think that does put off a lot of men
-I've also begun to think competition with the girls in Australia is hard!!! These women are super models, I'm short and, lets face it, not the skinniest of girls.
I was just inquiring about men in Sydney, who seem to be either gay, already in a relationship or undecided. Maybe its the age...most of these men were in their mid-20's...I'm 22. I guess age may play a HUGE role in all of this.
I'm not giving up and I'm not desperate, just curious. I'll be here for over a year so I'll definitely have more questions...keep posting though, I have so much to learn.
Thanks everyone! | |
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/4/2009 10:36:58 PM | One of the things I like about American Woman is that they say what they mean, and they will tell you what they want. Its a cultural thing, plus your in Sydney well double dose Sydneysiders are just like that. You need a crowbar to get any sort of conversation out of them.
your problem is that australian men are socially retarded,look at the way we brits treat women,with class and respect,make them feel like the queens that they are,ossie men just conjure up images of sheilas,beer ,crocs and trying to prove their masculinity,so very sad.if your heart desires love and compatability you're in the wrong country!
Maybe you should ask Brittish woman what they think of their men, same goes for Americans. The ones that I went out with were very forthcoming about what they think | |
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/4/2009 11:28:19 PM | | did I fail to mention I glitch when editing silly things like punctuation..tis a new thread @what's up with these immigrant certified aussie chicks that claim to have an education? | |
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/5/2009 1:58:29 AM |
your problem is that australian men are socially retarded,look at the way we brits treat women,with class and respect,make them feel like the queens that they are,ossie men just conjure up images of sheilas,beer ,crocs and trying to prove their masculinity,so very sad.if your heart desires love and compatability you're in the wrong country!
This is rich coming from a Pom! Mate, your whole friggen country is socially retarded. That's one of the reasons so many of your countrymen come to live here in Australia. | |
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/5/2009 3:10:23 AM | This is rich coming from a Pom! Mate, your whole friggen country is socially retarded. That's one of the reasons so many of your countrymen come to live here in Australia
Too true... they sent all us convicts down to our own private, eden-like island continent paradise - and we're the retarded ones??? In the words of Bill Hicks "Let me get this straight, you keep the the shitty food, the shitty weather, and we get the Great Barrier Reef and lobsters the size of canoes? ... I'm Jack the Ripper!"
@Any non-Australian living in Australia - Get out of the cities. They're not the real Australia. They're little facsimiles of every other city in the world. Can't even see the stars, or the horizon, and everyone is rude.
And yeah, I might be socially retarded ... how many people are in Australia? 22, 23 million? the total are o Australia is around 7,617,930 SQ KM... so thats what, 1/3 SQKM per person? No wonder why we're social retards, we have no one close by to talk to!! (and I do maths... that might be my problem...) | |
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/5/2009 6:49:16 AM | | bloomers, waists highs, g strings, no knickers, my 10yr old y fronts....makes no difference at all. AM considering cast iron knickers cos Aussie men love a challenge. | |
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/5/2009 7:03:04 AM |
-I've also begun to think competition with the girls in Australia is hard!!! These women are super models, I'm short and, lets face it, not the skinniest of girls.
I was just inquiring about men in Sydney, who seem to be either gay, already in a relationship or undecided. Maybe its the age...most of these men were in their mid-20's...I'm 22. I guess age may play a HUGE role in all of this.
Maybe there is a lot of generalisations. I find that my age sems to put off a lot of womeon. Well at least thats what I think it is, having kids doesn't help. Just because you are not skinny does not mean you will not find plenty of guys that find you attractive. Online is really a womans game. Men get what they can because the women have all the choice. The Aussie women you mention are not your competition at all becasue you will find that 90% of them can get whoever they want online and will. With the great disparity of guys to women on dating sites, this still leaves 90% of the guys online with nothing.
As for age and maturity/knowing what they want. Ask any woman that has been around guys much and they will tell you that most guys under 30 aren't worth your time. Problem is at your age they are the guys you are targeting. If you want someone decent online you have to up your age preference. Sure some of those will still not be any better but on a percentage basis it improves immeasurably.
Hope this helps. | |
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/5/2009 7:09:01 AM | | ^^ Agree, I am totally over the woe is me bullcrap, the omg he made a pass at me and wants sex crap, oh he didnt ring me and talk to me 15 times today, only 14 times, he sent me 99 messages not the usual 100 messages. Or the 101 other Im so lonely because I cant find my hornbag perfect male/female stuff. Interent dating sites really give no indication of who a person really is, even the photos generally give the wrong impression of profile posters. If your not happy with the ones you have dated try dating some of the others that may not live up to your 100% perfect male criterea, you may actually find they are being more honest about themselves. Oh and yeah if you actually are looking for someone it may mean getting off your pretty little ass and finding one, i.e sending out mails. | |
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| Whats the Issue With Men in Australia ..
Posted: 6/5/2009 7:09:32 AM | Generally, there is nothing wrong with Aussie men, British men, etc, you get****eads from every nationality and background. Though I find European men to be the more chauvinistic.
You just haven't found the right guy yet. | |
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